TTC 10 plus months, Part 7

[lisacn]

A friendly, supportive thread for those of us who are taking a bloody long little longer time than average to conceive.

Morning all, well it's certainly busy on here! No time to hang around today. But I thought that I would welcome Hocus. I'm glad you've stepped out from the shadows to join us! Good luck with your lap & dye on Friday. Hope you get some answers. I'm going to add my bit to the list but I'll do that on a separate post.
Thanks also to Purple for sharing re adoption. That's all very helpful. I have had no qualms about adopting, just not in the right place at the moment and am skeptical of the UK adoption process. Your son is very lucky to have you. It breaks my heart that someone could leave their baby on the side of a road. It makes me wonder how awful that poor persons life must be to have to do such a terribly sad act. Carrie sorry to hear that the Clomid saga is still on-going, I think you need to ask to see the original consultant to get some proper answers and to have some monitoring. It just seems plain dangerous to leave you on your own out there. Right-ho. I'll add to the list and pop back in later. Waves and hugs and to everyone.

Hi Ladies, seemed to miss a tonne of posts when i posted yesterday. dave ...is that you pout? I?m getting in a muddle now....sorry about your colds but does that mean you don?t have high NK cells? I always think the perfect time to try and conceive is when the immune system is low. Which CD are you on?
purple , it?s very interesting to hear about your experience with adoption, even if it?s outside the UK. Unbelievable that someone can just dump a child on the side of the road but from such a rubbish start, how wonderful that he has found a loving home. It is terrible you couldn?t take leave to adopt your son, thankfully I believe this country gives the same right to people giving birth and those adopting. Although I think if you do adopt here, you have to take 2 years off work.
hocus-pocus - welcome and sorry you have been at this for a long time too. Good luck with the lap and dye. What is it btw , is it a lapascopy?
nelly - sorry you ended up depressing yourself by going on the grads thread. We are all suckers for punishment and I sometimes go on to the pregnancy boards.. wtf?. I have sort of learnt to stay away from various threads on here because it would depress me so much. This is my little haven. I find I look at pregnant people in the street and just wonder how their bodies do it. The whole pregnancy thing and a growing bump just seems utterly unattainable to me as well. I?m glad you have done some research though ? Embryoglue sound interesting. I?ve been wondering whether someone could ever develop a system/body where a baby can grow outside the womb and inside some robotic human being that functions the same as a woman. Mind wandering at work again. Always a bed in central London here if you want one because our spare room is just that and not a nursery! I?ve looked in to ivm and really like that idea although I am not sure of the success rate of it so far.
sarlat - it?s the fear and anxiety that is the worst part to deal with. it?s difficult to know how to control it apart from thinking about the positives and you do have good blastos on ice which is fab. There are obviously some difficult hurdles to overcome but I hope a consultation with someone else will give you some better advice and at least allow you to go for FET. The ivf thing doesn?t feel real to me yet. I think once the first appointment is here then I will start to feel the pressure and the reality of it. I do feel very uncomfortable about doing it without a good reason to do it if that makes sense. Without a diagnosis for infertility then I will be going in to this with a lot of trepidation.
lemon - have you been offered a lap?
Have you seen in the news today that apparently men?s lifestyle doesn?t affect their fertility? I hope MrJoy doesn?t see this because he will be desperate to jump in to a hot bath and quit the pills i have him on plus start smoking again.

Still can?t get hold of this doctor at the hospital. I don?t want to be pushy but then again i have no idea if the receptionist is passing on the message, she sounds so vague and spacey on the phone. just want my results now and to be referred for a lap.

lemon both 33; TTC 24 months, unexplained, 3 failed iuis, next up lap&dye, then more IUIs or IVF (help!?)

Purple 39 and 47 TTC on and off for years. Unexplained. No medical assistance (yet?).

Sarlat 32, DH 47; ttc 25 months, diagnosis: damaged and fluid filled tubes, likely due to endo. Mild / bordeline male factor. Had hsg /ultrasounds / blood tests. 1 failed IVF cycle and 5 blatstos on ice.

buzzy 39 DH 38, TTC #1 for 14 cycles, miscarriages in June @ 6 weeks and October @ 10 weeks, 2 x ERPC's with a perforated uterus. Diagnosed with High NK cells, 2 cycles of Super Ovulation on Tamxifen, starting 3rd SO cycle on Gonal F. Possibly looking at IVF next year. Also having Acupuncture and taking a cocktail of drugs and supplements

euro 36 and 37, TTC properly for 20 cycles. Unexplained save for high NK cells. Tried 3 cycles of superov and 2xIUI. Now about to go for IVF.

princess 30 and 34, TTC #1 for 29 cycles. MC in June '09 @ 6wks and May '11 @ 7 wks (year off Oct '09 - Sept '10) . Poss blighted ovum and chemical MC in Jan 12. Blood tests show hormone levels fine except progesterone which is low but doesn't provide any useful information re ovulation as 7 DPO test hasn't been done. Right ovary has a polycystic appearance but no other PCOS symptoms. Under care of NHS Fertility God aka Arrogant Consultant. Blood test in July '12 to test progesterone levels, anticardiolipin and lupus anticoagulant (last 2 linked to recurrent MC). Also seeing nutritionist and following a preconception regime for 3 months. Advised that medical treatment (unless problem with next blood test) unlikely. Not actively trying from end of April until end of July as some of the supplements I take are not suited for pregnancy (i.e. can cause miscarriage)

lemon both 33; TTC 24 months, unexplained, 3 failed iuis, next up lap&dye, then more IUIs or IVF (help!?)

Purple 39 and 47 TTC on and off for years. Unexplained. No medical assistance (yet?).

Sarlat 32, DH 47; ttc 25 months, diagnosis: damaged and fluid filled tubes, likely due to endo. Mild / bordeline male factor. Had hsg /ultrasounds / blood tests. 1 failed IVF cycle and 5 blatstos on ice.

buzzy 39 DH 38, TTC #1 for 14 cycles, miscarriages in June @ 6 weeks and October @ 10 weeks, 2 x ERPC's with a perforated uterus. Diagnosed with High NK cells, 2 cycles of Super Ovulation on Tamxifen, starting 3rd SO cycle on Gonal F. Possibly looking at IVF next year. Also having Acupuncture and taking a cocktail of drugs and supplements

euro 36 and 37, TTC properly for 20 cycles. Unexplained save for high NK cells. Tried 3 cycles of superov and 2xIUI. Now about to go for IVF.

princess 30 and 34, TTC #1 for 29 cycles. MC in June '09 @ 6wks and May '11 @ 7 wks (year off Oct '09 - Sept '10) . Poss blighted ovum and chemical MC in Jan 12. Blood tests show hormone levels fine except progesterone which is low but doesn't provide any useful information re ovulation as 7 DPO test hasn't been done. Right ovary has a polycystic appearance but no other PCOS symptoms. Under care of NHS Fertility God aka Arrogant Consultant. Blood test in July '12 to test progesterone levels, anticardiolipin and lupus anticoagulant (last 2 linked to recurrent MC). Also seeing nutritionist and following a preconception regime for 3 months. Advised that medical treatment (unless problem with next blood test) unlikely. Not actively trying from end of April until end of July as some of the supplements I take are not suited for pregnancy (i.e. can cause miscarriage)

Joycep - 32 & 30. TTC over 2 yrs. m/c July '10. Unexplained. Tried clomid, IuI with gonal F. First ivf appt In July. Hoping for a Lapascopy & hysteo before ivf.

Just de-lurking to recommend to Euro to buy the Zita West CD for IVF. A lot of us on the IVF thread used it and found it really helpful - something about her voice is very reassuring.

Thanks carebear. I've just taken a look on Amazon. I'm not convinced it is for me though.

Morning lads! So I said to Mr Nelly last night "can I ask a question?" ( when he's working you have to talk to him like a toddler to ensure full attention!). So I asked what he thought about adoption. He looked she'll shocked and said he wasn't expecting that! Anyway he'd not thought about it but agreed it was one to tuck away in the Musing aisle for now.

Looked a bit more into natural or mild IVF last night so quite keen to follow that up more. For high FSH it may be as successful if not more so, for less cost per cycle? Any views from you educated lot?

nelly 37 Mr nelly 34. Trying for my first for nearly 2 years. All bloods ok except FSH of 11, but a year out of date now.SA all fine. Dildo-cam fine, HSG clear. Giving it a couple of post HSG cycles, then considering IVF but interested in natural/mild.

Carrie 32 OH 37. Him low mobility me one tube, previous ectopic and cysts, endo one child 6.Hsg proved remaining tube clear. 2nd cycle clomid with side effects around ovulation

June list

lemon both 33; TTC 24 months, unexplained, 3 failed iuis, next up lap&dye, then more IUIs or IVF (help!?)

Purple 39 and 47 TTC on and off for years. Unexplained. No medical assistance (yet?).

Sarlat 32, DH 47; ttc 25 months, diagnosis: damaged and fluid filled tubes, likely due to endo. Mild / bordeline male factor. Had hsg /ultrasounds / blood tests. 1 failed IVF cycle and 5 blatstos on ice.

buzzy 39 DH 38, TTC #1 for 14 cycles, miscarriages in June 11 @ 6 weeks and October 11@ 10 weeks, 2 x ERPC's with a perforated uterus. Diagnosed with High NK cells, 2 cycles of Super Ovulation on Tamxifen, starting 3rd SO cycle on Gonal F. Possibly looking at IVF next year. Also having Acupuncture and taking a cocktail of drugs and supplements

euro 36 and 37, TTC properly for 20 cycles. Unexplained save for high NK cells. Tried 3 cycles of superov and 2xIUI. Now about to go for IVF.

princess30 and 34, TTC #1 for 29 cycles. MC in June '09 @ 6wks and May '11 @ 7 wks (year off Oct '09 - Sept '10) . Poss blighted ovum and chemical MC in Jan 12. Blood tests show hormone levels fine except progesterone which is low but doesn't provide any useful information re ovulation as 7 DPO test hasn't been done. Right ovary has a polycystic appearance but no other PCOS symptoms. Under care of NHS Fertility God aka Arrogant Consultant. Blood test in July '12 to test progesterone levels, anticardiolipin and lupus anticoagulant (last 2 linked to recurrent MC). Also seeing nutritionist and following a preconception regime for 3 months. Advised that medical treatment (unless problem with next blood test) unlikely. Not actively trying from end of April until end of July as some of the supplements I take are not suited for pregnancy (i.e. can cause miscarriage)

joycep - 32 & 30. TTC over 2 yrs. m/c July '10. Unexplained. Tried clomid, IuI with gonal F. First ivf appt In July. Hoping for a Lapascopy & hysteo before ivf.

nelly 37 Mr nelly 34. Trying for my first for nearly 2 years. All bloods ok except FSH of 11, but a year out of date now.SA all fine. Dildo-cam fine, HSG clear. Giving it a couple of post HSG cycles, then considering IVF but interested in natural/mild.

Carrie 32 OH 37. Him low mobility me one tube, previous ectopic and cysts, endo one child 6.Hsg proved remaining tube clear. 2nd cycle clomid with side effects around ovulation

Just a sneaky lunchtime pop in. nellie I did mild ivf, so if you have any questions do ask. I chose to do it cos I prefer the idea of less drugs and don't see why they make you down reg.

euro have to admit that zita was a good friend when I couldn't sleep in the early hours. I'm very unwoo, but did like the relaxation aspect of it. I've ordered yet another of her books on ivf. I also bought the Maggie Howell cd, but in the first few minutes it made me really cross by telling me to let go of anything that might have subconsciously stopping me getting pregnant. Urgh what bollocks.

Please could someone add my stats? I'm on my phone...

Gin 33, mrgin 33. TTC almost 2 years. MrGin has a very low count (3.5 million has been his best so far, with the ultra good ivf microscope) and the sperms have poor morphology and motility. Round of icsi at Create in April, using mild ivf protocol. Good no. of eggs, but only 2 embies made it to day 3, possibly due to sperm quality. BFN. Planning another go in Oct/Nov and trying to decide whether to do some of the eggs with donor sperm this time...

Waves to everyone. Will catch up properly later.

June stats:

lemon both 33; TTC 24 months, unexplained, 3 failed iuis, next up lap&dye, then more IUIs or IVF (help!?)

Purple 39 and 47 TTC on and off for years. Unexplained. No medical assistance (yet?).

Sarlat 32, DH 47; ttc 25 months, diagnosis: damaged and fluid filled tubes, likely due to endo. Mild / bordeline male factor. Had hsg /ultrasounds / blood tests. 1 failed IVF cycle and 5 blatstos on ice.

buzzy 39 DH 38, TTC #1 for 14 cycles, miscarriages in June 11 @ 6 weeks and October 11@ 10 weeks, 2 x ERPC's with a perforated uterus. Diagnosed with High NK cells, 2 cycles of Super Ovulation on Tamxifen, starting 3rd SO cycle on Gonal F. Possibly looking at IVF next year. Also having Acupuncture and taking a cocktail of drugs and supplements

euro 36 and 37, TTC properly for 20 cycles. Unexplained save for high NK cells. Tried 3 cycles of superov and 2xIUI. Now about to go for IVF.

princess 30 and 34, TTC #1 for 29 cycles. MC in June '09 @ 6wks and May '11 @ 7 wks (year off Oct '09 - Sept '10) . Poss blighted ovum and chemical MC in Jan 12. Blood tests show hormone levels fine except progesterone which is low but doesn't provide any useful information re ovulation as 7 DPO test hasn't been done. Right ovary has a polycystic appearance but no other PCOS symptoms. Under care of NHS Fertility God aka Arrogant Consultant. Blood test in July '12 to test progesterone levels, anticardiolipin and lupus anticoagulant (last 2 linked to recurrent MC). Also seeing nutritionist and following a preconception regime for 3 months. Advised that medical treatment (unless problem with next blood test) unlikely. Not actively trying from end of April until end of July as some of the supplements I take are not suited for pregnancy (i.e. can cause miscarriage)

joycep - 32 & 30. TTC over 2 yrs. m/c July '10. Unexplained. Tried clomid, IuI with gonal F. First ivf appt In July. Hoping for a Lapascopy & hysteo before ivf.

nelly 37 Mr nelly 34. Trying for my first for nearly 2 years. All bloods ok except FSH of 11, but a year out of date now.SA all fine. Dildo-cam fine, HSG clear. Giving it a couple of post HSG cycles, then considering IVF but interested in natural/mild.

Carrie 32 OH 37. Him low mobility me one tube, previous ectopic and cysts, endo one child 6.Hsg proved remaining tube clear. 2nd cycle clomid with side effects around ovulation

Gin 33, mrgin 33. TTC almost 2 years. MrGin has a very low count (3.5 million has been his best so far, with the ultra good ivf microscope) and the sperms have poor morphology and motility. Round of icsi at Create in April, using mild ivf protocol. Good no. of eggs, but only 2 embies made it to day 3, possibly due to sperm quality. BFN. Planning another go in Oct/Nov and trying to decide whether to do some of the eggs with donor sperm this time...

Artemis 38, DP 40, ttc no. 1 over 2 years. MC at 6.5 weeks March 2011. Unexplained - bloods and ultrasound fine, sperm normal, on cycle 4 of clomid. HSG booked for next month, then 2 more cycles of clomid, then IVF. If HSG shows any problems we'll go straight to IVF. Not thrilled about that but it seems the only choice...

Carebear - how is everything with you? Are you doing another round of ivf? I haven't ventured off this thread for ages so I have no lurking knowledge. Well I know you have high Nk cells- do they think this is the main problem? I may end up getting these CDs when the time comes.

Just spoke to the doctor- got her direct dial finally so result. She said all bloods normal apart from amh ....and then said they had cocked up with the results. Phew she panicked me there for a bit. I don't know why but she wants me to do another monitoring scan so in I go next week again and I will get the amh done again. This is going to drag into July. Do you think it is worth me postponing my ivf appointment which is booked in 4 weeks until I know the whole deal with the nhs? I am thinking I better postpone until September....

Talking to a working DH like he is a toddler made me smile nelly. I know exactly what you mean. It is on the shelf for later here too. It does surface now and again.

Yes, joycep I got offered a lap&dye but got cold feet (and cried), so I have to confirm or decline next week. I did do the pre-op intake, since I had already taken the morning off work. I'll do it though, as I just need some answers. Btw euro the number quoted that was found to have endo or other things (adhesions/infections) after being unexplained was 40% by our docs. So still a 60% chance of continuing unexplainedness... The joys.

Re: lifestyle I made no progress with getting DH on any sort of adjustment, as he seems to get the best scores on his SA after going on holidays and drinking loads. I am sure he'd happily sign up for that for the duration of our TTC woes...

Hi all

Wow, it's busy in here. Some really interesting conversations.

Welcome to Hocus. I'm glad you decided to join us. Good luck with your lap on Friday - can I ask if that is a standard investigation where you are, or if they suspect endo or some other issue? I just ask because even tubal patency testing isn't generally done here, I have had to insist on an hsg.

I'm finding the adoption thoughts really helpful Purple and Nelly. It's at the back of my mind but I think being in the middle of all this investigation and uncertainty now is not a good time to be able to think rationally about it. I feel I want the whole experience of being pregnant and having my own biological child but those feelings may change if that turns out not to be possible.

Lady that's great news on your funding though it's a shame the family drama is still going on!

Buzzy thanks for the Trevi fountain wishes - if anyone on the thread gets diffed this month I shall be crediting it to you!

Nelly, step away from the grads thread! I have to stop myself. My secret hobbling is far less dangerous energetic than yours, though it does involve exercise (no it's not zumba!) I am intrigued by the embryoglue - what do they do, shove some Bostik on it?

Carrie have you been in touch with the clinic? You really need monitoring, Clomid does not sound as though it's agreeing with you at all.

Joycep I looked up that piece on lifestyle and male fertility. I'm keeping it from Mr A! He is already fond of blisteringly hot baths and cycles a lot but there was no problem with his SA. He finally quit smoking a year after we started ttc and I think the prospect of having the SA had something to do with that decision given that years of nagging, crying and strops from me had made no impact at all. I do think there are many positives to not having kids. My mind moves in that direction, when it's not busy mentalling, faking symptoms or despairing over my useless biology.

We saw the consultant this afternoon for the results of Mr A's sperm Olympics - all fine, they seem to be able to go in the right direction and at the right pace so no likely problems there. I took the opportunity to quiz the consultant about IVF. He is recommending it to us largely on the grounds of my age and because we are unexplained. He said it is also a 'diagnostic tool' - I said 'bloody expensive diagnostic tool' and he agreed but explained that there is a lot the current tests don't tell them. For example we know I am ovulating but not whether the eggs are good quality or not; MrA's SA was fine but doesn't mean the sperm can crack an egg and so on. I have asked for the HSG which I will have after my next AF. It means skipping a month of clomid but he didn't think that would matter. If the HSG shows a problem we'll go straight to IVF. If it's clear I'll do two more months of clomid desperately hoping for the mythical post-HSG diff then IVF after that. We are eligible for one NHS funded cycle but because of the time issue I'm thinking of self funding a cycle while we are on the NHS list. It would at least give us a head start. I'm envisaging 3 cycles with the NHS one in the middle. I haven't yet thought ahead to what we'll do if all 3 fail.

I suppose i should feel better that there's a plan but it is riddled with uncertainty still. It seems we are heading inevitably in the IVF direction and I am unhappy about it for the same reason others have said - no diagnosis, there seems to be no good reason I can't get pg (other than being ancient and knackered) - but as he pointed out, time is running out. Sarlat I totally agree, the fear of what comes next takes up all your energy.

Purple yep I've had my head in the sand for years too. Yesterday a friend asked me if I had considered getting 'accidentally' pregnant in the past. I do sometimes feel great resentment towards the men I had relationships with in my 20s and 30s who said 'maybe one day', which I now realise was short for 'maybe one day, but not with you', but had I gone down that route (oops! forgot to take the pill!) I would have been on the fast track to being a single mum and I knew I didn't want that. I knew when I met Mr A that I wanted children but it took him longer to be fully there with me. I guess I was ignoring the racing of my body clock but who can know the consequences of your decisions further down the line. We are where we are I guess.

In other news, I am already symptom spotting at barely 3 dpo. Tempers, if you use OPKs how long is the typical gap between getting a positive and your temp starting to rise? I had the positive on Saturday but my temp didn't go up until today. I think I have ovd but I don't know when - we may have ended shag week too early MrA went on strike No doubt our failure to get pregnant is a result of not having sex every other day throughout my cycle for the past 2 1/2 years Purple I loved your 'with who?' to the consultant - TBH I can't even think of any fantasy person past or present that i would want to have sex with for 17 days straight!

Waves and manly hugs to Dave, Keith, Jim, Lemon, MrsT and anyone else I've missed

Atremis you seem to have a lot to take in and choices to make.
I must be the only one who is happy to try everyday lol my OH isn't so its every other day over a week so we know we hit the ovulation time.
I have called clinic said i am not happy with last consultant, side effects and lack of monitoring so they have given me an appoint in a month. I knew it would be a while but any pain like last time I am straight at my gp, I have even booked an appointment for next week in case I need it

Thanks for all the lovely warm welcomes everyone :)
I think it will take me a few days to get up to speed with keeping up with everyone! Although I love how busy this thread is.

carrie A friend of mine was treated for Endo a few years ago. She had it quite badly and was told it could affect her fertility. She now has 2 fantastic DCs.

joycep Yep, it is a Laparoscopy to have a good look around, and then they'll inject dye through the tubes too to check for blockages. All under a general, which I am kind of pleased about as the indignity of it all is rubbish, and I'd rather sleep through it! :)
Still feeling nervous though as it gets closer, and also part of me feels irrationally angry that I have to go through it at all and my body can't just work like everybloodyone elses seems to

Artemis I think it's a bit of both to be honest. The Consultant said that they like to exhaust all possible causes before moving on to treatment of any kind. He described it as like a triangle of things that need to work in order to conceive - Ovulation happening, sperm ok and tubes ok. We know from tests that the first 2 are apparently fine, so the next step is to check the tubes.
He gave me the option of L&D or I think the other one was an HSG. He recommended L&D and I think he wanted it done specifically as he described it as the "Gold Standard" for seeing what is going on, and also due to there being a history of PCOS in the family (although I apparently don't have it according to the ultrasound) and a 'delightful' ExBoyf giving me an STI many years ago which it's possible (though hopefully very unlikely as treated early etc) may have caused some problems bastard

I'm finding all the details about IVF going on at the minute really interesting. It's always seemed very last chance saloon for me too, but hearing other experiences make it sound less scary. One step at a time though I guess.

I'll try and add my details to the list in a separate post.. will feel almost like a 'proper' member then!

June stats:

lemon both 33; TTC 24 months, unexplained, 3 failed iuis, next up lap&dye, then more IUIs or IVF (help!?)

Purple 39 and 47 TTC on and off for years. Unexplained. No medical assistance (yet?).

Sarlat 32, DH 47; ttc 25 months, diagnosis: damaged and fluid filled tubes, likely due to endo. Mild / bordeline male factor. Had hsg /ultrasounds / blood tests. 1 failed IVF cycle and 5 blatstos on ice.

buzzy 39 DH 38, TTC #1 for 14 cycles, miscarriages in June 11 @ 6 weeks and October 11@ 10 weeks, 2 x ERPC's with a perforated uterus. Diagnosed with High NK cells, 2 cycles of Super Ovulation on Tamxifen, starting 3rd SO cycle on Gonal F. Possibly looking at IVF next year. Also having Acupuncture and taking a cocktail of drugs and supplements

euro 36 and 37, TTC properly for 20 cycles. Unexplained save for high NK cells. Tried 3 cycles of superov and 2xIUI. Now about to go for IVF.

princess 30 and 34, TTC #1 for 29 cycles. MC in June '09 @ 6wks and May '11 @ 7 wks (year off Oct '09 - Sept '10) . Poss blighted ovum and chemical MC in Jan 12. Blood tests show hormone levels fine except progesterone which is low but doesn't provide any useful information re ovulation as 7 DPO test hasn't been done. Right ovary has a polycystic appearance but no other PCOS symptoms. Under care of NHS Fertility God aka Arrogant Consultant. Blood test in July '12 to test progesterone levels, anticardiolipin and lupus anticoagulant (last 2 linked to recurrent MC). Also seeing nutritionist and following a preconception regime for 3 months. Advised that medical treatment (unless problem with next blood test) unlikely. Not actively trying from end of April until end of July as some of the supplements I take are not suited for pregnancy (i.e. can cause miscarriage)

joycep - 32 & 30. TTC over 2 yrs. m/c July '10. Unexplained. Tried clomid, IuI with gonal F. First ivf appt In July. Hoping for a Lapascopy & hysteo before ivf.

nelly 37 Mr nelly 34. Trying for my first for nearly 2 years. All bloods ok except FSH of 11, but a year out of date now.SA all fine. Dildo-cam fine, HSG clear. Giving it a couple of post HSG cycles, then considering IVF but interested in natural/mild.

Carrie 32 OH 37. Him low mobility me one tube, previous ectopic and cysts, endo one child 6.Hsg proved remaining tube clear. 2nd cycle clomid with side effects around ovulation

Gin 33, mrgin 33. TTC almost 2 years. MrGin has a very low count (3.5 million has been his best so far, with the ultra good ivf microscope) and the sperms have poor morphology and motility. Round of icsi at Create in April, using mild ivf protocol. Good no. of eggs, but only 2 embies made it to day 3, possibly due to sperm quality. BFN. Planning another go in Oct/Nov and trying to decide whether to do some of the eggs with donor sperm this time...

Artemis 38, DP 40, ttc no. 1 over 2 years. MC at 6.5 weeks March 2011. Unexplained - bloods and ultrasound fine, sperm normal, on cycle 4 of clomid. HSG booked for next month, then 2 more cycles of clomid, then IVF. If HSG shows any problems we'll go straight to IVF. Not thrilled about that but it seems the only choice...

Hocus 32, DH 43 TTC number 1 for 15 months. Bloods/SA all ok, ultrasound ok so unexplained so far. Booked in for Laparoscopy and Dye in June and will go from there I guess..

Ello lads/ladies. Will attempt a bit of a catch up.

Welcome hocus. Sorry you find yourself on here but nice to 'meet' you.

carrie well done for getting another appointment. What a nightmare. It does feel a bit like they play roulette with our hormone sometimes.

Good news about Mr A's sperms artemis. Ivf as a diagnostic tool, wtf? Expensive and painful both emotionally and physically! Good that you have a plan tho. Fingers crossed for post lap diffedness.

lemons at your DH's best post booze up results. Like you, I'll be hiding that report from my oh.

joy yay for normal results! Do you feel ready for ivf or would you like a little more time? I know I just wanted to get on with it asap. More time, especially if you want to be 100% certain that there are no obvious issues that can't be fixed may be a good idea. And you can enjoy your summer.

purple your description of your life with ds made me :) He sounds gorgeous and v lucky to have you as parents. Adoption is definitely something we'll consider if all else fails and/or for a sibling. The only issue is I'd really want a baby and know it's v unlikely.

buzzy boo to the spotting. Loving the idea of you chucking a coin in the Trevi for us all.

sarlet I feel anxious on your behalf! God knows how you must feel. As you say though, keep in mind those lovely little frosties awaiting you.

ladyg sorry about the family crap. I too have issues there. Don't they understand I want to focus all my attention on not having a baby!

dave hope your cold is subsiding and good luck with the symptom spotting. I think I've finally learnt that feeling sick and bloated is af on its way although I normally pee on a stick anyway

princess the idea of the consultant as your beeatch made me a lot.

nellie I once tried to find our grads thread, but couldn't! Probably for the best...

I think someone mentioned that they feel pregnancy is unattainable? This is totally how I'm feeling at the moment. I just don't believe the ivf will ever work for us and I can't imagine actually having a baby (although cant imagine not ever being pregnant). Have a fear that I may need to reconcile myself to this, although we would adopt, if they let us. I worry they won't, not that I'm a worrier or anything.. Wish I could just switch off from it all, but it's v hard when everyone else seems to be getting updiffed (another announcement tonight...) I'm not feeling too down just meh, it'll never happen to us kinda thang.

gin I can relate to how you feel, ERTD is due tomorrow and I feel that I'm never going to have children, a friend is pregnant and its sadly not working out, although I feel really sad for her I just keep wondering why can't I get pregnant again, man I'm feeling really sorry for myself

Hello all,

Apologies for being awol - the problem with not checking in for a few days is that when you do, there's tons to catch up on!

purple sorry to only get back to you now about the identity question. I guess I don't worry about it too much - partly because I think of MN as being a UK-centric site, but also because even if someone who knew me did figure out who I was, I wouldn't mind. I'm rather an oversharer anyway and tend to spill my heart out to anyone who'll listen! So most of my colleagues and friends already know about my TTC woe. Very interesting to hear about your experience with adoption - thank you for sharing it. How unbelievably sad about your little boy being left at the side of the road. I'm so glad you've found each other!

welcome hocus! Good luck with your lap on Friday.

buzzy welcome back and glad you had such a lovely time. Thanks for wishing for us in the Trevi fountain!

artemis it's great that you have a plan. I think what you've laid out sounds sensible - the hardest part of this is the constant waiting, and it really helps to feel like you're going in a good direction. I'm sorry that IVF is looking like the next step - fingers crossed that the HSG will do the trick. As princess said, plan for the worst, hope for the best.

princess it sounds like your meeting with the consultant went well, arrogance and insensitivity aside, and your OH sounds like a gem - I'm glad he stuck up for you and made the point about how hard this is.

joyce how irritating about the spacey receptionist - did you get the results yet? I would be as pushy as possible. Must be living in the US that's made me more assertive than I used to be - at the end of the day, I try to tell myself that I don't care what

Morning everyone!

It seems that I have missed so much chatter while I've been away. I've tried to catch up this morning, and there was so much I wanted to comment on but now my mind has gone a bit blank.

First off I want to say thanks to joycep for organising the meet up. I'm sorry that I had to leave so early. What did you get up to after I left? It was so nice to meet you all and to see that we're all normal! I was very nervous before getting there because like some of you have said, ttc has made me a bit of a social recluse. I found being in the UK quite hard because I was meeting up with family and friends I hadn't seen in a while and the inevitable questions about when we're going to have a baby kept coming up. I've got quite good at giving some bland non-comittal answer which normally stops the line of questioning. It didn't work with my aunt though. She's a midwife and when I said something about "well, we do want children but not just yet blah blah" she then proceeded to lecture me about how I'm over 30 now and time isn't on my side etc. I wanted to cry. She also said that she's convinced K-mid is pregnant on the basis that her cheeks were looking puffier than normal at that jubilee concert . Did anyone see the photos of her yesterday in that blue coat? I must admit I think she's pregnant too although I thought she was ages ago too. Didn't the Edward and his wife have ivf after she had an ectopic?

That's enough about the Royals! I met up with some old school friends at the weekend and of course I was the only childless and non pregnant one. It was ok actually although I did glaze over everytime they talked about babies. I can't remember who said it but I also feel a bit meh about getting pregnant. I don't feel like it will ever happen at the moment. It feels like something that happens to everyone else. Being pregnant seems like such an alien concept.

sarlat I'm so sorry that this round didn't work. It is so cruel to go through ivf and then get a BFN. But I agree with everyone else that there is every reason to think that it will work in the end.

euro I can't believe you'll be starting ivf so soon. Have you got your head around it yet?

princess it sounds like your Dr knows what's he's doing. I find it reassuring when they seem confident it will happen.

pout I like the new name but you'll always be pout to me

I'm sorry I'm not name checking everyone. I've totally forgotten what I wanted to say and now I'm scared I'll lose everything I've written so I'm going to post this. Waves to everyone I've missed.

Morning all,

Nice to see you back MrsD. Sorry to hear about the insensitive aunt comments like that are really not very helpful when you are trying your absolute best. Oh and K-Middy, I think she is too, I reckon the announcement will come in August / September time. Everyone will want to have a baby and whatever the name of the royal addition is called will be being screamed across parks and down high streets across the land in a couple of years' time. I've got my money on Elizabeth (maybe daringly Diana??!!) or Philip because, yes, they really are that original.

Critter and big snort at the R Kelly mention. Maybe we could add a TTC chapter to his hip-hop-era? Actually I think that someone called Bridget got pregnant by a midget in it... he is a bizarre man. I've got my fingers firmly crossed for your shot and scan tomorrow. Let's hope that an egg is making it's appearance. Sending you good luck and love vibes across the Atlantic!

Gin Sorry it's feeling unattainable and particularly sorry for the announcement. I have been somewhat sheltered from the announcements recently. No doubt they'll be a whole new batch soon. You've had a really rough ride and it must seem like a long time until Sept / October. But it will fly and you never know what luck you might have before then. I hate the meh place, the sad place, the manic positive happy place, in fact I hate the whole TTC place. I'll join in with the meh chorus too.

Hocus your consultant sounds switched on and it's great that you're getting a 'gold standard' service. Impressive! at the ex boyf I hope that doesn't have anything to do with your problems.

Carrie well done for getting in touch to say that you are not happy and the pre-emptive appointment. I think you just have to learn the ways of the system for it to work for you. I hope that this round isn't as painful as the last. As Artemis said, you MUST be monitored if this is putting your health at risk.

Joycep how annoying that they got your results wrong and have to start again. However, at least you might get them to acknowledge when you ovulate based on your own knowledge unlike last time when they told you you were wrong.Fingers crossed for successful cycle monitoring this time. Have you delayed the IVF appointment?

Artemis glad that MrA's sperms got top marks at Aquatic Crufts. Did they give him a rosette? But pardon, what, diagnostic tool? IVF is not a diagnostic tool, surely? Yes I can certainly see that it will tell them certain things such as the crackability of the eggs (oh bit Wallace & Gromit) so in that respect I can see where he's coming from. Yet it seems like such a ridiculous comment. Just seems absurd to me. Have they put you on the waiting list or do you have to wait for the Clomid and the HSG stuff to have been discounted because we don't plan for failure ? Incidentally, I would argue that they do, given that I've been told to chill out and that it will happen later this year yet I'm having my blood tested and he's booked in another appointment clearly because he thinks there's something wrong with me - otherwise, why would they have booked the appointment. If there is nothing wrong with my blood I'm in the unexplained camp too. Grrrr to them all. I can't answer your temp question because I have only just started, however, my temp went up significantly 3 days after my positive OPK last month (the temps I had at OPK time were wrong because I wasn't taking my temp correctly).

Well in Princess news, the plasterer starts next Wednesday and I have put in place a proper schedule, which finishes the weekend before our anniversary trip away in July. That means we should be able to move into a newly decorated pad apres le mini break. We're not going abroad just to our fave place in the UK for a couple of nights - can't wait, 2.5 hours of spa treatments for 2 booked up - for newbies Mr Princess is very metro and loves a facial. If I can come back from the break to a finished house I will be very happy. I also had a letter to confirm my next appointment on 17/09, impressed that I got it 2 days after the first appointment. But also buggers up the holiday plans, as I only had a week and a bit in-between other family events and the appt is smack bang in the middle. Still, I think trying to book a holiday for September is too ambitious with the house stuff and possible move requiring days off. We don't have a date but I am anticipating August, however this could easily roll into September, which is a busy month for us already (a big 50th and 21st - taking up 3 weekends - in the nicest possible way!). I don't want to start moving my appointments as it's at the same time as the last one, which makes me think I may get to see the Consultant again, early on a Monday morning although secretly hoping that I will upduffed by then My temp chart is looking much more normal than the ones I did last year. I had temp rise after the OPK last month, and temp drop on day of period and continuing to drop into new cycle. This must mean that there is some semblance of normality and that my levels are ok-ish?! Oh and another behind the hand not helped by the good chart I'm not doing very well at the mindfulness stuff and found myself planning, yes, planning my future 12 wk pregnancy announcement that will happen in October in the shower this morning Must try harder to move these thoughts along and go "hmmn what an interesting thought brain. Next!". Like I'm going to get pregnant after attempt 1 post diet regime in July romantically at my favourite hotel on our wedding anniversary, which happens to be the predicted ov day on FF God damn you evil spirits of TTC madness! Be smited back to Mothercare and pick on the fertile ones...

Waves to everyone else, is Beryl out there lurking and where has wine gone?! Right onwards with the day.... hopefully I can move along the mentalling with some meditation technique at lunchtime....

lemon - what is the pre-op intake?
artemis - never quite understood how ivf is a diagnostic tool. Do people actually go through ivf and then find out what is wrong ..? I?m sorry you are feeling very unsettled about ivf. It?s difficult to get one?s head around. It?s great you can get 3 goes on the nhs then. I think we can only get 1. Is there anyone on here who is in an area that doesn?t offer anything? Apparently the Epsom area gives no funding.
hocus - i totally understand when you say you feel angry about having these procedures when most people don?t need them. I have this habit of thinking about my pregnant friends whilst I?m having my monitoring scans. I just think they don?t know how lucky they are to just get pregnant , go for exciting scans and give birth. Anyway, you?ll be fine with the Lap. Let us know how it goes.
gin sorry for the pregnancy announcement. Mrjoy tells me that we have to just get use to the announcements which i find incredibly unhelpful because I can?t really get use to them. Every one of them stings.
buzzy - sorry you are feeling like this . it?s so crap and frustrating when our bodies don?t play ball.
critter - i don?t think i have ever met an unassertive American. My cousins and SiL are American and they would never take bullshit. I have been told to go on an assertiveness course many a time but never have. It?s times like this that I wish i had. I know from friends that it?s those who always throw their toys out of their prams and those that kick up a fuss will get heard and seen to quicker. I just don?t have the balls to do it !
mrsd - welcome back, I was wondering how you were getting on. It was so lovely to meet you and I agree at how nervous I felt going but the nerves didn?t last long. We were all very tame really and just had dinner and left. I?m sorry about your unhelpful aunt. I guess as a midwife she only sees people giving birth and doesn?t hear people?s back stories. But I still would have thought a midwife would be sensitive towards the topic. I find it depressing thinking about middy and the possibility she is baking a bun. The media frenzy will be ghastly. However, on the flip side i wouldn?t wish her to have problems because it?s bad enough being a nobody and not being able to conceive...could you imagine the pressure? I can?t believe they haven?t not been trying up to now anyway. And yes as far as i am aware Sophie is one of the few people in the Royal family to have had problems. She did have ivf.
princess - you must be looking forward to your anniversary trip. That sounds fun.

I?m going in to my clinic at lunch to postpone my ivf consultation. I think I?m going to put it in the diary for October. I?m working on the basis that i will get a Lap and if that takes several months to book in then I will need some time to recover I guess. It?s still not that far away.

For those who have done ivf ? what sort of time period would i be looking at if I had my first consultation in October...would i get in a cycle before Christmas?

We are not entitled to IVF due to the fact I have a DD from a previous. No consideration is given to the fact that my partner doesn't have a child of his own. Yes he helps with DD but she has a dad who is very involved. She's the lucky one I guess.
Total emotional breakdown at work, didn't help I started the day with an awful headache which is not normal for me so guess another side effect of the clomid. Sorry I am being misrable but knowing that was our last chance before IVF which we can't have has left me very lost. A full month to wait to see if a miracle has happened and they can do something else otherwise we will have to try to come to terms with it all being over for us

Hi everyone

I'll join in with the 'meh' today... MrsDen and Gin I can't imagine getting pregnant either. Though having said that, like Princess I have on occasion caught myself rehearsing the 12 week announcement and thinking about what a lovely time i would have on maternity leave. What a strange kind of doublethink. I need some mindbleach to wash these dirty thoughts away. Speaking of dirty thoughts, Critter a massive and snork at the R Kelly comment... hope all goes well tomorrow and you get some insight into what's going on in your pants

Princess well done on your renovation planning, sounds like it's going really well. An anniversary diff would be perfect... MrA maintained a calm appearance during the appt but I think he was doing a little victory dance inside. I imagine him leaping about like a Crufts winner but with little wriggly sperms on the end of the lead instead of little yappy dogs. Yes i was unimpressed by the 'diagnostic tool' thing. I think what he was driving at is that IVF can help them understand what the problem is at a much greater level of detail so that treatment on subsequent cycles would be adjusted accordingly. He said he would expect it to need more than one cycle. We can't go on the waiting list until I have had the hsg and completed 6 months of clomid - a month later than I hoped as I can't take clomid in the month I have the hsg. I'm hoping I can have the hsg next cycle because I'll be away at a conference during ov week anyway. It might do me good to have a month off - a month of no mentalling, that would be strange indeed. My acu lady has told me to take some time off from that too. You know you're in trouble when even the woo people start to lose faith

Joycep like you we are only entitled to one cycle of IVF on the NHS. I would need to pay for the other two. Because the waiting list for NHS treatment is about 10 months my thinking is we should pay for a cycle while we are on the waiting list so that we get a head start. I could probably afford a third after the NHS one, but I think that would be my limit both emotionally and financially and I'll be well past 40 by then as well (eek). It's like an IVF sandwich with the NHS funded cycle in the middle. Here they will fund one cycle plus up to 4 subsequent goes using frozen embies from the first cycle, but he said that only about 25% of people actually get embies good enough to freeze so we couldn't rely on that. Plus the cutoff age is 39 at the time of treatment.

Hocus I'm glad you're getting the gold standard investigation. at the ex boyf but AFAIK infections don't generally cause problems if they're caught early. Fingers crossed.

Carrie I'm sorry you're feeling down today. I was very emotional and headachy on clomid, especially the first few cycles, I think your emotional state as well as the headache may owe something to its effect on your hormones. How are you feeling otherwise - are you getting the ovarian pain? Sounds like a good plan to book a GP appointment in advance. The rules on rationing of treatment do feel particularly cruel when only one of you already has children.

Waves to everyone and hope you're all feeling OK