TTC 10 plus months, part 6

[mrsden]

A friendly, supportive thread for those of us who are taking a bloody long little longer time than average to conceive.

Well princess I'm sending you a big virtual hug after what sounds like a real pig of a day. i feel so much for you to find that out unexpectedly when you were out and about. the only way I like to hear about pregnancies is by text in the comfort of my own home, preferably in my pyjamas. Once the tears come sometimes it is difficult to reign them in. I hope you are feeling a bit better today. And try not to worry about it, it always feels worse when you are the one crying. And you have had a long, hard tiring journey so you are well within your rights to be upset. But it will end this journey, for all of us, in the end.

nelly some days the babies get to you don't they? And others not so bad. I find shopping lately to be a bit in my face, babies, pushchairs, bumps. Cafes on a Sunday morning give me the tumblewomb too. Love to you.

pout how did the bunting go?

euro good luck, I laughed about the mooooo! Go get thyself inseminated!

gin sorry about your dh, but hopefully it was helpful to him. Mine had a chat before Christmas with his best friend. Unfortunately last night when I was out I was drinking water (as I am really trying hard to stay tee-total, bar a little fail on Friday when one glass made its way into my belly by accident) and he got excited and said exctedly oh, baby action?! I said no and he was a bit mortified. The joys. I hope you are bearing up ok. Other people's two week waits on here feel long to me, god only knows how dragged out it must feel when it's you. Thinking of you x

kitty I hope you have had a happy and uneventful weekend of letting it all sink in

waves to artemis lisa and any other weekend posters I've missed. It's been a busy one!

Yesterday I had the most god awful ovulation pain ever, I had to stay in bed for most of the day with a hot water bottle and paracetamol didn't touch it, it was horrible! I have no idea why but it was worse than period pain, I was a bit worried. it was all over my abdomen and lower back but today it is entirely gone, so as yesterday was cd14 that is all I can think it was, not peeing on sticks though. Has anyone ever had a really painful ov when not on meds? I wonder if it is a bad sign and to write this month off again due to some explosive egg disaster.

And pout you will hear your baby crying! One day I will remind you whe it won't stop crying

Hallo again everyone! Thanks so much for the lovely warm welcome ☺. You are all ace.

euro, thanks for the advice on Verity. I have taken a look at their site and it looks very useful although I?m not sure about the low GI diet ? clearly am too greedy/in denial. Good luck for tomorrow with the IUI, I really hope it works ? I?ll have my fingers crossed for the little swimmers to do their job efficiently, outsourcing or no outsourcing!

Princess I am sorry to hear you had a crappy day. I know exactly the type of person you mean when you talk about the exGF who ?picks on you in subtle ways?. I remember reading a book where the author described those kind of people as being like jellyfish, floating along innocuously enough until they sting you with a tentacle. It sounds like your DH is a sweetie, I?m glad he looked after you. It?s so unfair that you?ve had to deal with this? it really does suck.

Muddy sorry about your rough day in Edinburgh. It is a strange and horrible sensation to not feel able to look at other people?s babies ? it can feel like being stabbed in the heart. I hope you have been able to enjoy your wedding planning ? I remember totally obsessed with American DIY wedding blogs when I was planning mine.

Lisacn I hope this is your lucky month ? three peak days sounds highly promising.

GinSoaked I hope that your embies are snuggling in and that you?re feeling ok. The injections sound miserable. I have to take progesterone to make me have periods ? not suppositories, but they do make me feel awful, really groggy and spaced out, sort of like a constant hangover. I have heard from a friend who did the suppositories that they gave her peach coloured CM, interesting!

Pout I love that you?re making bunting. Is it for a party? A friend of mine who?s visiting from London just bought me some very snazzy Jubilee themed as a present from Fortnum and Masons (I live in the US) and I?m so excited about having a party and putting it up later this summer! What are you going to do with yours? Oh and about the doctor telling your DH to provide a sperm sample in the hospital loos. Good grief.

Frannie sorry to hear about the birthday period. Boo.

Beryl many congratulations on your new home!

Artemis Sorry to hear about the man flu. That is frustrating indeed. Nothing seems to put Mr Critter off his stride more than hearing that it is shag week? and I?m afraid that I can be very unsympathetic if he is ?not in the mood? or feeling ill?!

Kitty, mini, whatmess, stacks and izzy I loved reading back through the thread and hearing your positive success stories! Absolutely gorgeous to hear good news, it reminds me to keep my chin up ☺

Apologies to everyone else for gauchely not namechecking, I am hugely looking forward to getting to know you all better. I got a smiley face on my OPK today so Mr Critter was drafted in to DTD. Shag week is about to commence in earnest. Although not holding out much hope as I got a smiley face last month but still didn?t ovulate? harrumph. Anyway, the sun is shining here and I?ve been having fun pottering about in the front garden, so life is good.

Thanks ladies, your support means so much. I am feeling less of a sad sack this evening. pout i realise now that meadow does sound rather grand, in reality it's 4 packets of wild meadow flower seeds that I'm sowing at the bottom of a modest garden -because neither of us like mowing lawn- as I think it will look rather romantic and pretty. it will happen for all of us. It just gets you somedays and then others it doesn't seem to matter so much. DH has been great and we woke up to a really nice text from our pregnant friend to send lots of love and not to worry about leaving. It did make me feel really bad tho and set the crying off again as I felt like the child that always spoils the party. Hey ho.

euro thank you too. Hope your treatment goes well tomorrow. Fingers crossed for you.

lisa massive thank you xxx

I'm now exhausted from the moving rubble / digging modest back garden / eating loads at pizza express so am going to chill out with DH on sofa. As im still a bit sad i may get tea on tap. Worth a try eh?! Hope everyone else had had a lovely day. Thanks again for kind words, you're all so lovely :) xxxxx

Delurking to say good luck to euro tomorrow!

Good luck euro.

Am I missing something re bagels pout? Why so rare? Can't say I'm much of a bagel fan myself, I prefer floury baps . Preferably stuffed with bacon. I know what you mean about the glimpses in other people's lives with their babies, and wondering if it will ever happen for you. We've talked on here before about feeling like an intruder in the baby aisle in supermarkets, and I know if I'm ever around my friend's babies I tend not to hold them or play with them much - as if that's reserved for the Chosen Ones only.

Princess I'm so sorry you had such a bad day. I hope the smashing up the kitchen floor let out some anger - and also that this was a planned bit of DIY and not just an expensive punch bag! The wildflower meadow sounds lovely, as does the pizza express!

Good luck for Outsourcing day euro, I really hope this is your cycle. Massive LOL at Prossie sex . I agree, Mr Artemis needs to deliver the goods, cold or not!

gin are you feeling any more comfortable today. I missed the bit about your DH crying with his mate. I think that's reassuring to hear actually, nice to know it matters to them just as much as us, I think? Hope you are both feeling ok today, between hangovers, bruised bits etc.

kitty glad you have some symptoms! And stacks great that so far so good on the scan.

lisa and purple impressed at your globetrotting. I lived in the caribbean for a couple of years which was nice but not very unusual. And teu I'm so jealous of you living in NZ, it's by far and away my favourite place of everywhere I've been.

I do feel ov wine but nothing that ever keeps me in my bed. Any word on what Mr Big has to say - might be worth a question regarding your missing fibroid, in case it's related? There are so many things to worry about aren't there?

I don't think I said hello critter. thanks for the sympathies - I'm lucky I guess that Edinburgh is a nice place to be in a sulk I suppose .

Hello karbea how are you? We miss you here, hope all is well with you?

Feel a bit less maudlin now but was still in a bit of a funk. I didn't do heaps today which never helps, but we did at least buy a new (old) dining room table off gumtree for much cheapness. And we have pretty much agreed we are going to replace our kitchen! This is very exciting as it's very old and manky, so much so that it doesn't even have a single drawer in it .

Sorry for everyone I've not name-checked, you know how busy this thread is. Will try try try to keep up during the week!

Hello, hope you've all had relaxing weekends. No time to post properly now, have had family down for the past few days but really wanted to say thanks for all of your support following my rant the other day. Will catch up properly tomorrow night but sorry you've been feeling so crap princess hope you are being served lots of tea and treats. Also wanted to wish euro the best of the British tomorrow- wishing you lots of luck x

Hi nelly,

I'm ok, I've had ivf but it failed. I've been putting on this 'I'm fine' face, but it's occurred to me this weekend that I'm not really, just very numb.
We go back to the clinic on the 1st may and they'll give us feedback, we will try again...

Hope you are all well, sorry I've been AWOL.

I'm very sorry karbea :( I know it's trite but they do say IVF is a multi-step process, and that it seems more likely to fail on the first go than to be successful. Hopefully the cycle will have given them some useful information to use next time. Hugs to you.

Thanks for all the good wishes everyone!

critter I think it was the Tamoxifen that made it 3 days in a row, I don't have any kind of symptoms AF/PG think its all masked by the progesterone, I'll test on Tuesday but have already put in my prescription for next cycle.

karbea sorry it didn't work this time, hugs x

nelly impressed you have been to NZ, it is rather nice Graham Norton said he thought kiwis were smug , my dad is a doctor so that is why we travelled a bit

karbea a close friend of mine had an unsuccessful first round. She then had an FET - which is now a cheeky toddler. They had one frozen embryo left so used that not expecting it to work and planning to go through another full cycle and ended up with identical twins!

She remembers her consultant telling her when she went back after the first attempt that the hospital considered it a successful cycle. She looked at her in disbelief and said "but I'm not PREGNANT!". But it all turned out well, so please don't feel that one "failure" means IVF will not work for you.

I hope this helps. Hugs.

I'm sorry about your upsetting day Princess, hope you're feeling better now. There is no good way to hear a pregnancy announcement but at least if you're at home you can swear at the computer/phone and cry undisturbed. Getting handed a scan at a party has to be the worst way. Your DH sounds lovely and I'm glad the friend was sympathetic. I like the sound of the wild flower meadow!

Nelly you are by no means the only one to avoid eye contact with a baby. I can't deal with them at all. I stand around being stiffly polite while everyone else is gurgling and cooing, it makes me feel like a freak. I haven't found any good way of dealing with it but I am at least reassured by your Marie Claire article saying that these feelings we have are normal...

Euro good luck for today, fx for the outsourcing! Nelly I too have considered outsourcing the whole job of sperm donor when MrA is pissing me off

I'm really sorry the IVF didn't work out for you Karbea. I hope the hospital have got some helpful info about what they need to do differently next time. Hugs to you.

Have any of you had irregular cycles on clomid? I have no idea what my body is doing. CD18, still no positive OPK, I might have missed the surge but my temps are all over the place too. Last month's clomid cycle was textbook, ov on day 15 with a clear temp rise. I may just declare shag week over and count myself out for this month. I'm knackered and fed up of peeing on sticks and obsessing poring over the stupid charts and chasing a reluctant MrA round the house like some rubbish parody of a Benny Hill sketch. At least it will make the 2ww less traumatic MrA seems to have recovered from his manflu but spent the weekend sniffling and whingeing, though I managed not to have a complete meltdown about it. Instead I picked a pointless and unnecessary fight with him yesterday over a jumper...

I'm losing track of this thread, it moves so quickly. Love to everyone and good wishes for a better week... Gin I hope you are feeling better. I had best get myself moving and off to work. I've got one of those meetings where I will have to spend the morning massaging important people's egos and I am really not in the mood!

Massive good luck wishes for today euro. Exciting!

princess glad to hear that you are feeling better. Meadow flowers are beautiful aren't they. I love poppies and cow parsley.

karbea I'm so sorry to hear that your IVF hasn't worked out this cycle but agree with others who have said that it is a more than one cycle treatment. Next time!!

gin hope that you are feeling less battered and bruised. Cystitis..yuk. Your DH sounds so sweet BTW!

artemis I did laugh at your DH risking death is he didn't come up with goods despite his cold.

lisa how are the tiles?
Adoption isn't for us but I have a plan b for a barren future which involves moving back to our old stomping ground of NW London (we won't need a family house if we have no sprogs and can get a flat again).

kitty I am glad that you are feeling pregnant. I am so happy about your BFP
Also thanks for explaining about the tablets to stop AF. I was a bit confused before about how on earth it all worked.

purple any movement on AF front?

nelly I was sorry that you had such a crappy day out. I get in those moods and can't shake them, usually when shopping!
Yay for new kitchen table. I would love a new one, one of those Victorian pine ones with turned legs would be my dream table. At present we have two tables pushed together because I like a big table. Unfortunately they are different heights and sizes . A strategically placed table cloth covers this up fairly well but you have to be careful where you place your drink!
Bagels..I love the ones from the Morrisons bakery.

Oh and I agree with you about the feeling awkward around babies. I do smile at them when cornered but I feel like I have a big flashing barren sign over my head and that I oughtn't be engaging with them because I am a freak.

wine Sorry about your ovulation pain. I have had something similar only once. I was babysitting my nephew and the pain was so bad I couldn't stand up straight or walk properly and was shaking and sweating with the pain. I panicked because DH was away and at one point I thought if this gets any worse it is an A&E jobby. Weird. Anyway I hope that you are feeling better today.

critter Fortnum and Mason bunting, yikes I bet that is nice salivating smiley I saw some postage stamp bunting on ebay and loved it but I knew that DH wouldn't have it in the house. He is Scottish and hates all things "royal" or Union Jack
My bunting looks surprisingly okay so far but it's not finished...have made 35 flags so far, double sided and all hemmed [proud & astonished smiley!!!!!!!]. DH clocked all the flags & looked at me in panic and earnestly asked "we're not having bunting everywhere are we?"!!! It's for the bathroom which is the crappest room in our house so I am embracing the kitsch!

Big confusion in the house of Pout. I spent all day yesterday being 100% convinced that my period was about to start complete with period pain, period headache, sicky feeling and that clear CM. Confusing as it was only CD21. Also TMI info alert but my cervix was the lowest & softest it has ever been?????????? Can not having SWI for a month affect your AF?

Hey Nelly and Artemis, avoiding eye contact with babies? Well I'm thinking of avoiding eye contact with humans...try this on for size....
We have one son, who is adopted, and trying for a second using remembering to shag and doing so at the right time of the month method.
In a random conversation about kids today I was advised that perhaps if I REALLY wanted (I guess rather just pretending) my "own child" (someone just shoot me now), I would do IVF.

pout cross posted..yes I'm CD2 now. Most of me is unsurprised, a little goes WHAT, I did EVERYTHING right..etc. I was also on another thread with three ladies with matching cycles, all now BFP. What are the chances? I have been off the pill for years (and years) just holding on to a small hope that I can tip the balance somehow (yeh mainly by actually shagging).

Hi lovely ladies.

lisa - we don?t have anything like an occupational health dept in my office. There are just 7 of us and only one other woman but she is not a boss. The guy in charge is a bit of a knob if i?m being honest and his deputy is an even bigger knob, a snitch, a teacher?s pet. Also i?m going to try and get a hysteroscopy on the nhs at my meeting next month. Hope the spotting has stopped now.

carebear - at ?that?s why god created 2 tubes? comment. It is just awful the amount of extraordinary comments we have all received from various people in the medical communities. I?m sure there are plenty of nice things but it?s always the awful ones that stick.

pout - let us know what your DH?s boss says. I am sure most people are understanding...but somehow i just don?t think my lot would be if they found out.

gin - so have you been on sick leave all this time? Also how come you are on the steroids?? I?m sorry you are feeling so battered and bruised. The 2ww must be hideous as well. I?m sorry that your DH cried ? it?s quite cute but it just shows that it does affect our men too but it?s all beneath the surface.

kitty - i?m glad you are having some symptoms and glad all is going ok so far. So exciting!

nelly - it is comforting to hear that we are ?normal? in hiding ourselves away. I?m sorry about your trip to Edinburgh. It?s horrible when you find yourself tutting away as you walking down the street. If I am in a particularly glum mood, I find myself scowling at people with kids. You know you are being a witch but you can?t switch it off. I hope you are feeling better now. Hopefully the new kitchen will take your mind off things for a while at least.

princess - i?m terribly sorry about your awful Saturday. Did these friends know what you are going through before she waved her baby scan in front of you? Being told face to face is the most unpleasant way to deal with such news. I hope you are feeling a little less teary today.

euro - best of luck today! We definitely need an IUI success on this thread.

wine - i am sorry about the ovulation pain. Isn?t it strange how our bodies are doing different things every month. Perhaps you released more than one egg but probably worth mentioning at your next meeting.

critter - welcome critter. at your dh being drafted in to dtd!! That?s a very good way of putting it actually!

karbea - i?m terribly sorry about ivf not working this time. As others have said , they will have learnt a lot and hopefully will adjust various things for next time.

artmeis - yes i had very irregular cycles on clomid. I hated being on it because it delayed ovulation for me and made my period come even earlier. I also had a 21day cycle whilst on it. I must have spent hours looking at my charts over the years. Sometimes i have found myself getting in a stew over one temperature which looks out of kilter.

pout - have you had any swi this month or have you given it a complete miss? I have always found in the past if i didn?t have any sex, my cycles are different.

purple - who on earth advised you that? What an appalling comment . Did you advise them that your son is your own child? Staggering.

It looks like my Dh is having to go away for a month at the end of this week . So irritating as it?ll mean he?ll miss our meeting with our nhs consultant but mostly I feel pretty lost when he?s not around really.

Hi ladies! Gosh so many of you have lived in exotic places - I'm very envious. I've only lived in Cambridgeshire and London!

princess so sorry to hear about your weekend. God, I'd have gone nuts at that kind of preg announcement. It's so sad that this ttc shite puts such a downer on 'normal' life. I hope you are feeling a bit better. Big hugs.

wine ouch at the ov pain! I tend to get twinges -some quite severe- but not normally enough to send me to bed. Having seen the corpus luteum on screen though, I'm surprised it's not more painful more frequently! Good luck with your appointment.

critter yay for the smiley face! Hope you are getting in some quality swi

nelly pleased to hear you are starting to feel a bit better. DIY projects are a good distraction I think.

karbea sorry to hear that your ivf cycle didn't work. Was it your first? Hope you get some good advice on the 1st.

lisa are you testing tomorrow [excited emoticon face!]. Good luck chuck!

artemis must be very frustrating to have your cycle mucked up, esp when you are taking something that's meant to be helping! Maybe your eggs are just making sure they are lovely and mature?? at Benny Hill DH chasing round the house.

euro lots and lots of good luck today. Hope it all goes really well.

pout I'm super jealous of your bunting. Wish I was good at that kind of thing. I'd love to Cath Kidstonify our house. I've noticed that less sex = weird cycle. The more we have early in the month, the sooner ovulation seems to be.

purple at those comments. Your little boy sounds lovely. Was the adoption process relatively easy?

joy I had tues-fri last week as sick leave. EC was on a bank holiday, so that saved me a day! As I was sedated for both EC and ET, I needed at least 2 days off for each of those. I've also had bleeding & soreness that meant I couldn't have worked, but that's not normal. I'm off on annual leave now until weds afternoon. One of my friends asked me why could I have sick leave for it. Ffs, cos I've got huge tears in my lady bits! Luckily I was just back from ET when she called, so still chilled by the sedation. Sorry to hear your DH is going to be away. Mine has been away for just the weekend and I've missed him so much.

I'm feeling much better now but yesterday wasn't good - ended up most of the evening on the loo crying with the pain from the cystitis! Rang my clinic who said I can take the cystitis powder and that combined with using the pessaries up the back door, seems to have helped loads. at your tight arse comment lisa - mee too, stays in place much better! Having felt so rubbish, just pleased to feel more like myself and trying not to focus on the 2ww (now 1ww)...

Oh ffs. I just wrote a monster post and MN had a wobble and I lost it! I'm feeling a bit wobbly and not sure I can retype it all! The gist of it was sorry you have cystitis on top of everything else gin, purple you have done a fantastic thing by adopting, Artemis letrozole messed up my cycles a bit - put my usual days 14-16 ov back to day 20 on my first go, so don't give up hope yet!

I'm just back from my IUI. It was ok, just a bit uncomfortable and undignified - similar to a smear/HSG. The only bad news was about Mr euro's sample. It wasn't great - low volume (0.5ml) and low count (13million), although motility and morphology were good. His worst results do far. The clinic staff went through lifestyle factors with me and as he doesn't smoke, has a good diet and drinks very occasionally, there isn't anything he can do to improve it other than take his manvits more consistently but they said that isn't going to double or triple the count. As he had already left the clinic by the time I went, it was left to me to break the news to him.

Hello,

Wow, so much to catch up. We do talk a lot on this thread. I love it! I'm afraid I won't be able to do a monster post now because I've got to go to the dentists. But I wanted to say to euro that 13 mil isn't really that bad. Was that the total count in the sample? If the morphology and motility were good, and they've timed it right and put them right next to where the egg will come out then surely there is a good chance it can work. And if you do move on to ICSI then remember you only need one per egg. If it's the semen volume that's a problem, has he seen a urologist about it? Because I know that can sometimes have several causes, many of which can be helped ie blockages, low testosterone.

pout I love bunting, you're so clever to be able to make stuff. I am hopeless at anything crafty.

joycep sorry your DH is going away, you'll have us to keep you company though.

princess what a horrible way to hear about a pregnancy. I love the sound of your meadow, very grand.

purple how mean to say that about your son. Some people have no idea do they?

gin I'm sorry you've been feeling rubbish. Cystitis is awful and not what you need. You're so close to the end now and I'm keeping everything crossed for you.

I've got to go now and see my dentist. He's a bit of a hunk so I don't mind going , although I think I need a filling and no amount of eye candy can make the drill more appealing.

Poor gin, cystitis has made me cry on more than one occasion. In answer to your question, I don't think you will find anyone who found an adoption process easy, each one is different but all pretty demanding. Anyway long term TTCers know about demanding.

euro glad you got through that. Poor Mr Euro, that's rubbish news, sometimes it's even harder when there is not much you can do about a situation. Fingers crossed for you.

Waves to all.

Hi everyone, I thought I should join you all as we've been trying about a year with nothing happening, which seems odd to me as most people seem to get at least a cp in that time. So I'm pretty sure something's wrong...

Anyway, to introduce myself, I'm 29, dh is 30. We recently went to the gp and have started blood tests etc for me. Day 3 bloods ok, await day 21 next week. Husband's sa was 5ml and 580million, but morphology only 3%. He's going to do another one next week, post shag-week.

mrsd and kitty both kindly replied to my thread on this saying it may just take us a bit longer... So here I am! I am a,very impatient person, so finding this quite hard. Dh is lovely but doesn't want to talk about it all much...

euro very exciting for iui, good luck!

Welcome keep, I'm new-ish to the thread too, me and TTC have been hanging out together for around one thousand years. Seems I'm a bit rubbish at making babies... Good luck with the tests, not a fun process I know.

Afternoon lovelies!

Sorry I could not be here this morning to wish you good luck, euro. So sorry the sample was not as good as you would have hoped, at least they did not need to swim as far. What were the numbers after prepping? (They throw all the rubbish away, and according to our clinic if you're over 5million at that point, you are doing very well).

Massively sorry about your failed cycle karbea.

And generalised waves, about bath room bunting pout, about pg announcements, except on here and vvvvv about That Comment, purple. Sorry you're DH is away for a month and going to see consultants on your own is rubbish joycep, hope you feel a lot better soon gin, keeping fingers crossed for the last WW, hope you survived the dentist ok, *mrsd. And cakes and cups of tea for everyone else!