Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum! Find your sea legs and sail on the seven seas in the BESH Pearl

[HaveALittleFaithBaby]

Argh, and be welcome to our new pirate Fred. Be finding yourself a parrot and a wooden leg and hop on board for the trip of a lifetime. Argh.
If ye be new and wantin' to join our motley crew, be filling in the BESHtionnaire application below. Argh.

1. Do you like gin? (This is compulsory, you must say 'Yes')

2. Men - are you a gold digger or a cradle snatching cougar?

3. Baybee-making - to put a baybee in your tumtum, which hole do you use:
   a) weewee
   b) poopoo
   c) foofoo
   d) none, you just pray to the baby Jebus.

That's a "c", right there...

4. Testing - when someone wonders if they should test for updiff (pg), do you:
   a) bellow 'POAS!' at them non-stop and punch them repeatedly in the kidneys till they wet themselves anyway.
   b) Sprinkle them with babydust and send them hugs and kisses on lickle baby angel wings.

5. Is R2D2:
   a) an adorable robot from Star Wars.
   b) the source of all evil.

6. Number of pets?

7. Inappropriate (read: weird) crush of shame?

George Michael. He'd be off the drugs and on the straight and narrow ('scuse pun) if we ever met...

8. Lesbian crush?

9. What are your views on camping?

10. How much money have you spent on sticks you then urinate on?
    i) Oh nothing, I'll probably catch first time and then get the doctor to confirm it.
    ii) Over 100 quid
    iii) I opened an account on ebay solely for the purpose of purchasing sticks

Finally, tell us how you found the BESH and why you'd like to join us pliz.

Steady on, lem, let me finish sechsing first!

Anyone ever applied for a stop gap job massively different from their previous career? How much do I need to soft pedal previous career history? They ask outright about previous salary, for example, and (not at all a stealth boast, so please don't think that, especially as I know there are plenty of high earners here) it is about 5 times what this one will pay. Will they shun me straight away as a result? Should I just lie outright?

I'd be inclined to the honest and put under reasons for leaving :Due to relocation and wanting a change in direction...I think bizarrely enough, in the current climate, people are going for jobs they'd rather do to be happy so you should be ok..
We really need to start sechsing soon. I have a tendency to ovulate early on. Tick tock!
dor, glad to hear you're still diffed! :) Did you put your pregnant chart in the gallery on futility fiend?

I think I put it on faithy.

I have just found out that a girl I used to work with is also diffed - she must be a few weeks ahead of me. It's very exciting as she has had lots of fertility treatment.

They don't ask for reasons for leaving. Argh! Maybe I will find a space to put it anyway.

Aw dor you have a little preggo friend to hold hands with during the early stages of the journey! That's luffly
norf can you put it in a covering letter? Explain that you've relocated, you recognise it's a very different role/pay scale but you want to go in a different direction and have a new challenge?

Good idea, feefee.

I hope so - she said she has already had a few scares which means she is not getting her hopes up too much yet. Bless her.

Did you tell her you were diffed too?

Hurrah for still being diffed and having nervous pg-friend, dor. That sounds perfect for hand-holding. Although I really hope both your nerves will turn out to be for nothing. When will you be telling anyone? Except your parents and the GP, of course...

Good plan faithy. I am having an informal job chat with someone tomorrow and got myself completely confused this morning, and convinced myself it was Thursday and I was late. Neither was the case...

Yeah I did tell her I was diffed. Seemed like the right thing to do as we have shared everything else.

I am having trouble keeping my gob shut to be honest. MY parents and sister know and my best friend. I hjust HAD to tell her. I am hoping to keep my trap firmly closed until 12 weeks now .

Blimey, we've nearly used up fred in all the excitement. Anyone have any ideas for the next one?

Must be time for a Eurovision fred soon.

dor when I did my midwifery placement she was a tad about keeping quiet during the first trimester. Her ethos was you should tell people because you'd need their support if anything God forbid did go wrong. I wouldn't tell the world, but I'd tell close family and my best friend. I'll tell the people who would be there for me.should the worst happen so I think the people you've told are fine.
Oh dear, I'm watching Homes under the hammer and they're in a fire damaged property :( Memories flooding back. Actually it's worse than ours!
I dunno about the new Fred though I would suggest we do 1st post as intro to theme, then the beshtionnaire as 2nd post so the OP isn't massive to scroll.down if that's cool?

I think that's my theory too. I am not about to tell Joe Public, but there are some people I want to know.

Agreed about the BESHtonaire out of the first post (in fact, I think it is unfair to make it this easy I found it and stayed, didn't I?) Although we do need new blood, considering we had a blond and dot win this fred. :) I would also quite like another language themed fred? Deutsch anyone? Or Italiano?

Pleased you've told those really close to you dor, I agree with faithy's midwife. So I would tell my parents and sister for definite.

Italiano might be quite sechsy? Although Italy has a low birth rate. Can't imagine the Deutsch getting you all in the mood although if you go for the stereotypes, some German efficiency might be good for all the regimented timed sechs.

dor first time round everyone and his dog knew I was diffed by 8 weeks. Obvs it didn't work out but that wasn't because I'd told work and in a way it was good to have understanding from others. Second babyfail nobody knew and it was really really hard having to tell people who didn't know I was diffed what was the matter. You just do what you feel comfortable with. In any case I have just superglued your fanjo shut.

I've never really understood the need to keep duffage completely quiet until the 12 week scan. If anything were to go wrong, I would tell close friends and family so why not tell them I am duffed in the first place? (Obviously I have had ages to think about who I will and won't tell because it is taking SO BLOODY LONG). Ahem.

I think there's a line isn't there? You don't want have an awkward conversation with someone you don't see often, but if they're close, it's exciting to share with close family and friends :)
drizz I know what you mean, but we always need fresh meat. Actually, I don't think we have had any newbies on this Fred despite the beshtionnaire at the top!

Maybe the next fred title should be a shameless plea for new meat.

How to make friends and DIFFluence people, maybe.

No, that's shit.

Come on down to the BESH party in town?!

Dor someone on the 10+ fred got her BFP last night, also on month 19. You have a duffage twin.

I quite like the idea of a Eurovision fred next. We can be all camp and stuff. It's fitting because I am about as capable as producing offspring as your average gay couple. No scratch that, less so.

Bitter, moi?