TTC for 10+ months, part 4

[eurochick]

Time for a new thread as the other one is just about full.

Fingers crossed for lots of patiently-awaited BFPs on this one!

pout personally I never get boob pain before ov at all. Mine usually starts with a few twinges a day or two after ov. I usually know just before futility friend confirms ov (which is after 3 raised temps I think).

I will keep you posted on the immunology stuff.

Bring on the desert island!

Pout I like the idea of your dogs only opening their presents. I told my DH last night that I either want a baby or a new pet next year. I want something cuddly and warm that I can look after and dote on. Our cats aren't cuddly cats at all, and the snake is lovely but not really cuddly. I think I might go for a couple of guinea pigs or rabbits. I hope your ovulation happens soon, I've never really noticed much boob pain around ov, so can't give any advice there. I just go by my temp change.

Joycep I was diagnosed back in 2009, so got my first all clear in 2010, and again in 2011 (by CT scan), they don't check your bowel in the CT though, so I get the colonoscopy for that. They found signs of polyps in the scan last year (which could develop into cancer again) but they weren't too worried. I was, and still am.. but hopefully this scan will show no changes. There's about a 60% 5 year survival rate for my age group (or by older data a 48% rate for how advanced it was). The 10 year rate is similar, so if I stay all clear for a couple more years they'll consider me "cured". Kind of wish I hadn't looked that up again. I had to do a lot of should searching before thinking about tic after my first all clear. I wondered if it was selfish to have a baby when I might not see it grow up. If I'm honest, it's still a concern of mine. I hope your period or a BFP turns up for you soon. I'd be really frustrated and angry if I was in your place. Really hope your doctor replies soon, and with useful information.

Kitty I'd love to go on a Carribean fertility retreat :) I hope AF hasn't turned up for you today. I also have got to the point where I want to know WHY. DH has decided he wants to get his results asap, so he'll be calling the docs tomorrow. We discussed how it might make him feel if the results are bad, but he's decided he'd rather know for sure, and not just worry. That sums up how I feel about the whole thing - unfortunately it's not so easy to get that kind of answer for the general fertility problems. I think I'd even welcome an IVF referral, though I can see me feeling very differently if I get one. Just feeling like I'm moving forward would be good.

Wine I'm sure your lap and dye will go ok. Many people go through them, and I've never read an awful account of one. I hope you keep enjoying boozy evenings and manage to SFF.

Euro I hope you continue to have no side effects from the drugs. The immunology results sound interesting. Have you ever had a BFP? I must admit I am very worried that after a year of very well timed SWI I've never had any kind of BFP, chemical or otherwise. Is 'Pred' prednisolone (or however it's spelt?).

Nelly hope your internet gets better soon! Posting from a phone is painful and slow. Do you use a MN app (i.e. on an iPhone) or just use the website? I really like the new mobile site for reading. So much easier and quicker, and no adverts at all (which is nice, as I hate the adverts on here, all kids and babies and pregnant women). My DH would never cancel a work trip for SWI, he'd be very apologetic, but he's just not the sort to tell the boss "no". Your OH sounds properly committed :)

Lemon really hope the bleeding clears up soon. Try and get some enforced relaxation and enjoy lots of Christmas tipples, pate, brie etc. I hate feeling like I missed the chance for a month, though I guess there's a chance some of those swimmers will still have got through and be waiting for the egg.

I've spent all morning writing this between meetings and working. FF says I'm on 11DPO, but I think it's actually only 10. I've had slightly lower temps this morning, but not low enough to expect AF, been feeling a little sick too, and also so flight cramps. I think AF will make an appearance tomorrow morning. I don't really think there's any chance I'll be pg this month, but if AF doesn't turn up for the weekend I'll have to take a test, as I can't do the colonoscopy if I'm pg. Sunday will be CD31, and my longest previous cycle was 30. I'd say 99% chance that AF will arrive in the morning. Back to work I guess, this has turned into a MAJOR post, but I wanted to respond to everyone. Maybe I should have kept it all short and to the point...

pout I get sore boobs from anywhere between 5dpo and 10dpo. I never get them before or during ovulation but I'm sure I've read that some ladies do. What CD are you on now? I admire your gallant SWI effort.

euro that's interesting about high nk levels. I don't really know anything about it though, except what I read on HFEA website. It's good that you're getting somewhere, next stop BFP! Have you ever felt that you've got to an embryo stage? I wasn't surprised in many ways about the diagnosis for us of low sperm count because I'm certain that sperm has never met egg in our case. I've never had anything to suggest that I've been even a little bit pregnant. Total tumblewomb!

lemon I always bleed a bit after a smear and also after dildocam. Did you get any SWI in beforehand?

wine I will be thinking of you when you have your lap. I agree with kitty that you will be so relieved when it's over and then you can have a nice relaxing xmas, even if you are a bit sore.

kitty I'm liking the sound of our fertility spa retreat. If I win the lotto I am going to make sure all you lovely ladies get to be mummies by paying for you to see the top fertility bod in the whole wide world. I have no idea who that is by the way but I will hunt him or her down.

stasi I am wishing you so much luck and hugs for your hospital appointment.

joycep did you hear back from your gynae? I'm so sorry you got a BFN. I can also completely relate to your toilet meltdown. It might be hormone related if you are close to AF. I've felt so bad the last few days but I think I'm through the other side now. AF is on the way out and I'm not tearful anymore. Thanks to all you lovely ladies for making me smile and feel better about everything. It means so much to know others understand. DH is fantastic but he doesn't know what to say or do when I'm blubbing.

I am going to try and get in the xmas spirit and write some cards. It's a bit late now though because I've probably missed the overseas post but nevermind. Does anyone else dread opening xmas cards in case they contain the words "our big news is we're going to be parents in 2012!!!!"

Stasi I hope your results are good and you can relax about that for a whie (and just have ttc to mental about!). Pred is prenisolone or however you spell it. I can never remember the name, hence my references to pred!

mrsd I think sperm has met egg several times, although I have no proof. Back in early 2010 before we were properly trying but not using proper contraception either I had a month where I got light pink bleeding long before my period would have been due (in 23 years of mensturating it is the only time I have seen that sort of watery pink blood). I also felt dizzy and spaced out for a few days. When I googled, I came across implantation bleeding (I had never heard of it - they were much more innocent days!) and learned that the dizzyness could also be a pregnancy symptom. It took me a few days to pluck up the courage to test and by that time I was bleeding properly and it was negative. At the time I wasn't too perturbed because I had bought my wedding dress a week earlier and would never have fitted in it if I had been pg. I also thought it was encouraging that we seemed to have got pg without really trying.

Then we started trying properly (trying to hit the best days) a year ago. The first cycle I had nausea for a day and some of the same dizzyness as before, but my period came as normal. The next cycle I had indigestion (for the first and last time in my life) and a few other symptoms. But my period came as normal. I had symptoms for the next couple of cycles too. I got cramping a few days post-ov. In one cycle around 7dpo I got sharp stabbing pains that stopped me in my tracks around the supermarket. But in the past few months I haven't had any symptoms. As I understand it, this pattern would be consistent with an NK cells issue as it seems that each "miscarriage" makes them stronger (people with recurrent miscarriages tend to get them earlier and earlier). I am trying to get my head around the fact that I probably have had several very early m/cs. It is horrible to think of my body shredding potential embryos. All those non-babies :(

More phone posting as at work. I use the App Stasi but am just a rubbish typer on it! Good luck for the hospital and of course for no AF! OH has only just realised I need him to get on board properly (no pun intended) and I was surprised he was so willing.

Thanks for the NK explanation euro, that's a nasty sounding name they have!

I'm not normally so charitable pout but I know if I let that thought in, it might never leave

Very sore period like pains today which I assume are ovulation related unless I'm pregnant even though I've had BFN and a period so am on gusset-watch Plenty shagging thus far so I will really have earned a BFP if this is the month. But not as much as that nympho pout

that is sad to think about euro, but at least it is something they can do something about and hopefully stop it happening again.

stasi I agree it's probably best not to dwell too much on statistics but it sounds like you're doing really well. Did you have chemo? Would that have affected fertility? I have a colleague who had bowel cancer and she has just reached her 6th year being all clear .

My friend's DH has just texted me to say she had a little boy last night after a very quick 2 hr labour. I've just realised that everyone I know who has had a baby this year has had a boy. Where are all the girls? Also, the name they have given him is the same one that two other friends have chosen in the last couple of months. It's funny how names become suddenly popular, I'm sure they all think they've chosen an unusual name. I picked names out when first starting ttc so I can safely assume they will be long out of fashion by the time I get to use them .

I never thought i would write this on here but hip hip hooray , my period arrived today. It was really beginning to panic me and there is nothing like sending off an email to the doc to spur things on. She hasn?t got back to me mind you. Never cursed someone as much as i have been cursing my doc under my breath. Thanks everyone for all your words, you?re all such a supportive bunch . I cannot believe that the next time AF arrives, it will be 2012 and i will be a few months off the 2 years of trying mark. How bloody depressing.

pout - i think reading the other conception threads to self torture ourselves just goes with the territory. I will never understand why i open threads like ?ttc dc5, month 2 and 2ww is torture? It just leads to misery and bitterness. On the boob pain front mine usually occurs as soon as ovulation occurs. Apart from last month where i was in agony before ovulation but then ovulation never happened. My doc, if she is to believed, says you should only really get it after ovulation but i?ve decided to take everything she has told mea pinch of salt.

Gin - what an amazing story about your friend?s friend. It obviously took her 8 years to learn how to relax.

kitty - really liking the idea of a Carribean spa fertility retreat. How amazing would that be! Sorry about the spotting though.

wine - hubby got out the yantra last night on his own accord. He lasted 45 seconds! I think I?m going to try and do it a bit more.

Euro - so your inkling was right. Does your doc basically say that the high NK cells are more than likely to be the reason behind you not conceiving? By the sounds of it you may have been conceving a lot. Don't they say that people with high nk cells are less likely to get colds and illnesses?

stasi - as ever your posts are always humbling. Screw the stats. Stats are ultimately bollocks on an individual case by case basis. You'll be absolutely fine.

mrsd - totally dread the xmas card thing. I'm already nervous about going home tonight as i'm expecting this card from an old school friend. When i last saw her, she was in the same position as me, m/c and trying for a year. I am sure she is pregnant again. She was very upbeat and positive about things when i saw her. I quite admired her.

hi to everyone else.

I guess so, joycep. Since I heard about NK cells I thought it might be the problem and when all of the other tests came back as normal I went for it and tested. I do get very few colds. Some of the ladies on the Pred thread were talking about it and they are the same, so there are some advantages to having a ninja womb. Mr euro has a mental image of a vicious game of British bulldog going on in there each month.

OK going to try for a quick C/P post this time, as my boss isn?t here right now.

euro I cross-posted earlier. It does sound ummm what?s the right word ? sad, worrying, possible, evidentiary? ? that there was something going on in some of your cycles, as you say. I?ve always thought I?ll know if something is happening. The last couple of months my body has played mean tricks on me, but I guess in my heart of hears there was nothing really symptom-wise, certainly not in the way you describe. I don?t know if it?s a good thing or a bad thing that you may have made sperm meet egg? I guess the good sign is that, if there is an issue with rejection, then if there is something you can do to fix that, it surely bodes well for a BFP? My current concern (like stasi )is that despite 19 gallant attempts, I have not a shred of evidence that the two have met. Maybe IUI might work . I know we?ve said it on here before, but when you do get the BFP and your own little bundle, then THAT is the baby you were meant to have. It?ll be perfect, and it will all be worth it.

Ooh stasi my friend has piggies and loves them, although she has just got a bunny too and they are all super-cute. I am pretty sure my cats would have a bunny for breakfast though, so any new pet in our house would other be ginormous and neigh a lot, or woof at the very least .

So sorry the bleeding is still going on lemon and that it will lead to a wasted month, I won?t even try to pretend you will feel alright about this because I refer you to my earlier ?panic?. Sometimes when we?re in bed at night and OH is falling asleep, if I know it?s close to OV time, that?s when I get the panic at the fact that that was probably the golden egg, you know, and the daft lump is snoring beside me instead of doing his duty . Maybe though you can use Christmas parties to your advantage and have a genuinely good time, not worrying about what you might be pickling (other than your liver). My AF is also due between Christmas and NY, and going by previous cycles I will likely start spotting on Christmas day. Oh joy. So of course if I don?t then I will just be going mental instead even though I know that ERTD will arrive at some point like the least wanted Christmas present ever

Who was asking about boob pain? I never get it, so perhaps that will be a new one for me to mental over in future cycles? So when I start saying ?oooooh my boobs hurt, I wonder if this is a pregnancy symptom?? you can all kipper me and remind me that my body has a sick sense of humour.

On the contrary though, I normally get noticeable tummy pain, and today it is really bad. It?s been constantly sore for a few hours now, definitely period-style. Usually my OV pains are a bit sharper, but perhaps this is just the pre-OV phase. I think I?m not due to release the useless prune golden egg for another day or two; but we?ll be getting Jiggy later anyway.

mrsden I don?t think I?ve ever seen a BFP announcement in a Christmas card. That?s what Facebook is for, innit? Plus, who could be bothered writing that 40 times? It?s all I can do to sign our names! Good news about your friend though . Our friends went through a spate of all being boys. Maybe the girls are all waiting for us? I did at your choice of names being unfashionable though!

Does anyone know anything about taking aspirin in the 2ww? What would it do? I would ask if anyone has tried it, but as a scientific experiment, we probably aren?t the most conclusive of results .

Oh dear, typed this ages ago. Just going to submit then go home and catch up later!

Hi everyone. Just a quick post from me as i was on call last night so pretty knackered (16.5 hr nightshift).

I POAS this am and got a HIGH on my monitor. Its about 5days early but i think its correct as i had copious EWCM yesterday (couldnt do anything tho!). Hopefully that is the metformin kicking in!

Apologies for not namechecking!

Evening ladies,

I'm supposed to be preparing for a pitch tomorrow but have found myself reading a couple of days worth of this lovely thread instead. Posts from cakes, kitty and wine were just what I needed to read this evening in a soul-less hotel room 200 miles from home I seriously don't know what I would have done without this thread over the past few months. I'd be a little less sane, that's for sure. My bags are packed for the desert island!!

wine - belated happy birthday to you. Sorry it was combined with AF. Good luck with the lap & dye, are you having that because the HSG didn't go ahead in the end? Apologies, my memory is rubbish at the moment.

mrsd - sorry you were feeling low, good to hear that you're coming through the other side. I do dread the Christmas cards, we have a few friends who write the obligatory 'our year on a side of A4' - I struggle to read these anyway but this year I don't think I'll even try.

stasi - I can totally understand ttc not being top priority - I'll be thinking about you for your hospital appointments. I'm sure they'll be fine. SA results are an interesting one - we had a similar situation in that we could ring up to get the results the day before we went on holiday in July. DH just wanted to find out so he did, it wasn't great news but tbh we didn't really get a full understanding until the consultant appt a month later anyway. I'm sure yours will be fine though.

euro and pixie hope the drugs are being good to you still.

euro it sounds like the NK cells might provide an explanation, I hope it's the start of good things to come for you. It makes me wonder what else gets missed on the NHS system, and if we are doing the right thing by going straight to IVF without getting some of the more detailed tests done. Though, on paper, our problems are pretty cut and dried.

lemons - so sorry to hear about the wasted month and the bleeding, I hope it sorts itself out soon

pout - kudos to you for your commitment to SWI - it's got to pay off! I don't really get boob pain any time of the month so can't advise there, sorry.

nelly - good luck with the rest of shagweek!

joycep - hooray!! So pleased that your period has turned up (sounds weird writing that!) - we can add emailing consultant to the list of surefire ways to get the witch started!

Christmas is edging closer and I'm praying for some little miracles for us all

So what has TTC tainted for you? Me- orange juice (slippery womb!?) alcohol (how can I still be allowed to drink, even my reduced limit?), Ice in drinks / ice cream (cold womb?), hot tubs (never have much to do with them but have now avoided a hotel which had one)...

For my DH I fear it might be SWI!! In an effort to reduce pressure I wasn't going to tell him when OPK showed the smiley face (which of course was that morning) but he really couldn't get in the mood and always knows when it is SWI... (and is strangely more in to it when the shagfest window had closed!) Thankfully we managed it this morning but all feels a bit of a slog. Was feeling positive as ov seemed a couple of days early...

How do you all keep it going???

Snow it is only really duty swi that has been tainted for me I think. I'm ignoring orange juice and all of the other things that have been suggested might be a problem now. I am just sticking to reduced caffeine and alcohol, as there seems to be some scientific support for those.

Nelly I tried low dose aspirin (all cycle, not just in the 2ww) for a couple of cycles back in the summer. The NHS gynae rubbished it saying it does nothing to help, so I stopped. The private gynae I am now seeing for the immunology stuff insists all his patients take it. It's yet another thing there seems to be no agreement on! I didn't have any ill effects from it, but I did noticed I bruised more easily, particularly from acupuncture.

Thanks euro -I only thought of it as I was hungover on Saturday and now avoid NSAIDs. Asked OH if we had any paracetamol but he said only aspirin or cocodamol. The latter knocks me out so that got me thinking about aspirin. I might try it for this cycle, could it hurt I wonder ?

So snow no ibuprofen for me. But not sure I've let anything else take over. Didn't go to bed till 11.30 last night, way too late, so we had to "make" ourselves shag. Luckily though we both still get enjoyment out of it but no way would we have done it unless desperately TTC! I have probably cut down alcohol a little bit, but that said got smashed last Friday and may well do the same this Friday. Oops! Still have a coffee a day. Cold food and drinks are off the menu anyway as it's winter

Morning ladies.

lemon How are you today? Has the bleeding stopped? That sounds horrible & must have been frightening. What butcher did you go to for your smear? It's unbelievable and makes me think of a blood test I had at my old GP surgery when the nurse said how she wan't sure whether she had wanted to train to take blood because it had made her feel a bit sicky. I have to say it was the only time a blood test hurt! BTW have passed on your doggy cuddles & am now passing back to you lots of doggy slobber

Stasi A new pet sounds exciting. I keep fighting the urge to get a rabbit but common sense tells me that this would be a bad call and Bugs might end up as dinner for one of the mutleys. What type of snake do you have? I'm terrified of them and have an irrational (I hope!) fear of one popping it's head up out of the toilet bowl while I'm on it. DP wanted a snake a while ago.

Mrsd I'm glad that you are feeling better and coming out the other side of AF. I think that things always feel a bit better when another ovulation is on the horizon. I'm on CD18 now and think that I have ovulated. How is the Xmas card writing going?

Joycep Like you said it's a weird thing to type on this thread but I'm glad that your AF has put in an appearance. I am annoyed at your consultant too for not getting back to you especially when she has been happy to bank your money Are you going to carry on with her?

Nelly How is gusset watching going? Ladygee hope the pitch went okay and that you get home soon.

Thanks for the boob advice ladies, very helpful as always!

snow The only thing TTC is currently ruining is our sex life which has gone from quality over quantity to quantity and no quality Having said that I was thinking last night, as I was sat on the couch feeling generally depressed (again), that TTC vainly for what feels like forever has generally sucked the joy out of everything. I have a lot that I should be happy about at the moment but instead I just feel low and miserable all the time.
I have given up on the giving up things for TTC IYSWIM except for the fact that I won't take Ibubrofen unless it's for period pain and I know I definitely have my period.

I have wondered about the aspirin thing too. The trouble is I sometimes take it for my migraines and it gives me the most awful heartburn so I'm not sure about taking it regularly. I've heard baby aspirin mentioned but am being thick and don't know what that is and if it is any different to normal aspirin.

Going off tangent here totally, what do you ladies think of faux fur jackets??? I have seen one that would totally match the dress I am getting married in and it would be nice and warm for a Glasgow wedding but having watched My Big Fat Gypsy Christmas last night I am a bit I really don't want to look back at the photos and think "what the hell was I thinking" but I don't want to have frostbite either.

Hi ladies, bit of a mamouth moan coming up I'm afraid! Hope you are all ok.

DH had his urologist appointment this morning and confirmed the disasterous SA results and that ivf would be out only option, although that might not work (and there's no funding). DH has something called oats (oots? Not sure of spelling!), which basically means there's v little normal sperm. He has to have an ultra sound on his bits and then we both have to go back at the end of Fed to discuss options.

The urologist has also referred me for tests, which I'm a bit about. I totally hate anything like that and would want to talk to a dr about it all first and also possibly request a female gynae. Mental I know. Also I only want them doing once, so don't see the point of NHS ones if we end up going private (having robbed a bank!) and having to have them again.

Has anyone with males problems had sperm frozen? Apparently the dr suggested it, as we don't know if the numbers are all going down rapidly. I don't know if the NHS would pay for this...

Sorry for the moan. I was expecting all this, but it's still hard and i've ended up crying on dh again. Stuff like what Stasi is going through puts it all into perspective.

Have told DH that we're getting a dog if we can't have kids. I don't care if he's allergic!

Afternoon lovely ladies!

Pout I am so pleased you are back on the thread, you make me laugh nearly every time. And thanks for the slobber :) we live in a flat and I am fairly allergic, so we are not allowed any pets. But I am jealous of your menageries... Sadly I have a very vivid imagination so next time I go to the loo, I won't be checking for blood, but for a snake instead. It should make a nice change . And I am your boob sister - and it starts with me from about 24 hrs post ovulation (read I started being a bit more sensitive yesterday and this morning my DH mentioned their increased size).

Thanks for asking after the bloody bleeding, it seems to have cleared up and I did ring my GP and she reassured me on Monday, so I have not worried too much since, I am convinced my egg came and went yesterday and although my DH was trying to convince me that it was not too late for some gentle SWI (I think he just wanted the S part), I refrained. So that is a boxing day period lined up for me.

I completely overlooked your results euro so sorry. You got me inspired and I have completely over-googled immuno-stuff today. And I am actually quite convinced that this is not what is wrong with us. If all else fails I'll succumb at some stage, but I get every cold going, I have blood that fails to clot quickly (read: easy bruising). It is good though that you finally have something they can try to treat. It is better than the beating aroung the bush that us unexplained ones need to do.

Whilst googling - I might have dipped into medical literature for unexplained infertility and pg chances, and I did see that our anecdotal evidence that those with DC already get pg sooner is true, also scientifically. Just if you have had a pg before, your body seems much more likely to manage again. And that also goes for MC, joycep. I won't elaborate too much, as I found it all quite depressing... But we still have a good chance, all of us!!

Hmm, things TTC has ruined for me, snow, that is interesting. I loved not being so intimately acquainted with my lady parts and more for it, that no one but DH ever saw them was better too... Oh, and it has completely taken the joy I used to feel when people announced pregnancies or births. Thankfully, I do still love children and babies, although I have had some sneaky tears whilst cuddling my baby nephew. For us SWI is still going quite well, we both enjoy it and have a whenever-we-fancy approach, which is much better for me than the enforced must do it now regime.

Hope all is well during check up stasi and I reckon you are definitely overdue some amazing luck, so fingers crossed for the BFP combined with new pets. Always good for a bit of sod's law timing! Hurrah for AF joycep and imminent egg(s) izzy. I hope the coming cycle brings us some more luck. We are overdue some cheery news! Nelly cycle - sister you must be nearing the end of the shag-fest as well. But what is up with the stomach aches :( I picked out our girl's name at the start of TTC, as well mrsd and it is not such an unusual one, so I have been stressed by all the baby girl births. We have been enjoying the unusual (read bloody weird) names that friends gave their little ones, in fact we discuss them regularly and cackle in evil ways . Hope you get to go home soon ladygee because being miserable miles away from home sounds rubbish!!

Right, this is a monster post already. Waves and festive mince pies to all of you (both mentioned and missed!)

gin Could oats? be a shortened form of oligospermia (low count) and teratospermia (poor morphology). That's what they said DH's SA showed. Severe oligoteratospermia or something like that. Freezing sperm hasn't been mentioned to us. Have they found a reason why your DH's sperm is like this? What sort of tests does the urologist want you to have? Is this in preparation for IVF? Is there no way you can have IVF on the nhs? I'm so sorry that this is the diagnosis, I know how totally hopeless it can feel. But, ICSI has a good chance of working and that's what I focus on. As long as they can find one decent sperm then it can work. How is your DH feeling?

pout I have just about written all the cards, I need to post them now though and it's pouring down with rain so I might wait until after work to do it. I've only had 4 cards so far this year, do you think people don't bother sending them anymore or am I just really unpopular?

city ttc has stopped me letting DH have a bath and also we used to love going to a spa with hot springs but we haven't been because I worry that the hot, themal water is bad for sperm. I've given up worrying about what I eat and drink. Not to sound depressing ladies, but I think our problems are more fundamental and won't be fixed by a few tweaks in diet.

I feel ok today, Af has gone. I even had ewcm this morning which seems very early (only CD5) so I'm a bit . I was hoping to have a bit of a longer respite from SWI but looks like we might need to start again. I hope I do ovulate early because we are staying with family over xmas and there is no way I would be comfortable getting down to business on an airbed in the lounge. What if Father Christmas disturbed us?

Cross-post with gin, so sorry about your news. That sounds awful! I would refrain from too many tests if you are not able to go for IVF at the moment anyway, I did not enjoy them much. But that said, now I have had them all I could not care less who looks at me down there, remember it is their job. It may be worthwhile to inquire whether you can "transfer" your results from the NHS to a private clinic, if you were to go for treatment, as it would save you paying for them again. No idea about freezing and stuff - we are unexplained...

And X-post with mrsd, good you are feeling better and getting ready for some early SWI, much rather do it now than on an airbed... But I hate to break it to you, father christmas does not really come to fill your stockings, although being disturbed by your mother/father would probably be worse than by father christmas.

mrsd I am just behind you - CD4 here. I agree about the tweaking diet bit. I've tried avoiding peas, soya and various other things I read about on the interweb but now think I need hardcore drugs to get anywhere rather than dietary tweaks!

drizzle it is good that something has been found but I wish it was something less "experimental" so there was a bit more certainty over treatment. Still, I am not complaining! There is a treatment protocol and I am on it from this cycle's ov, so at least we are moving forwards.

gin my private gynae has accepted all our NHS results (bloods, HSG and SAs) although he wanted to do his own dildocam scan (and of coure carried out the additional tests we were there for). I suspect the NHS IVF clinic will want to rerun a lot of the tests as by the time we get there the first ones we had will be almost a year old. Sorry I can't help on your sperm Qs.

pout and nelly I don't think they call it baby aspirin any more (maybe people were trying to shove the tablets into tiny babies or something...). I get mine from Boots and it is just labelled 75mg aspirin. Make sure you don't get the full dose stuff as that is too much to have on a daily basis. I bought my last lot alongside some Pregnacare and got questioned by the pharmacist but she sold it to me when I confirmed that I had been advised to take it by my consultant. No one asked me anything when I bought it without the pregnacare. I think so many people (particularly older people) take a daily dose now to ward off a variety of ailments.

gin I hope you're ok. There is a lot of information to process when you have these sort of appointments and it takes time to sink in and to understand what was said. If you can get your tests done by the nhs then maybe the private fertility clinic will accept them and so you will have had them done for free. You will have to have them all done at some point if you're going for IVF even if they know the problem is with DH. Most of the tests aren't that invasive. I think the hsg is the worst but I'm sure a private clinic wouldn't make you do that again if you've had a recent one.

One of the things that this long term ttc has taken away is the excitement of poas, as crazy as that sounds. I always thought that I would poas and then there would be a clear two lines and I would wrap it up and give it to DH as a surprise . But now I've had so many negatives, poas is not exciting to me. It's associated with total disappointment. Also, I know that when I ever do get a BFP I will be terrified of something going wrong and I wish that I had the ignorant bliss that most people have who never consider that it won't work out perfectly.

pout I like fake fur, but then it's very fashionable here. Actually I suspect that some of the rich people here are probably wearing real fur which I don't like to think about so I convince myself that it is fake they are wearing. I have a fake fur shrug which I love to wear if I'm going somewhere smart in winter, I always feel cosy and warm but it looks chic (well, I think so anyway!)

euro - I wonder when they'll properly look into immunes and its role in sub fertility as there is so much mixed reporting on it. I guess until they have conducted a controlled scientific study the hfea won't be able to change their guidelines. it would seem this could potentially help a hell of a lot of ladies but not sure how the nhs would cope with such treatment. I have been wondering about it for some time but only on the basis that I never get colds or haven't done for some 5 years. Whereas I use to get them a lot when I was younger. But it may be that I eat a lot of fruit and veg.

pout - I'm fuming too about my consultant. That was the last time I was going to see her unless my cycles don't go bac to normal after this. I normally am to blame as I huff and puff and fume to myself and to DH but I can never say anything to the people I am cross with. Sadly DH and I are both doormats in that respect. Anyway more importantly faux fur jackets - do you mean the long white fur bridal ones? I am beig totally honest here but I looked in to the
For my winter wedding and when I showed it to a friend she was really rude about it. Ok I don't think I have the best choice in clothes. So I never went down that route and just froze. For me I think i was pleased I didn't get it but I have seen people wear fur shawl types things and I think they look nice. But obviously i don't know what it looks like or what you look like so it may look good. If you think there may be a chance you will look back and wonder why you got it, I wouldnt buy it.

Gin - I am sorry about your awful day and your husband's SA results. I don't know whether the nhs freeze sperm, I hope they would if there is a good reason like this. I do think you should probably get your tests done if you go down the ivf route as they always need up to date tests anyway. What a shitty day. I am sorry but they can do amazing things with ICsi.

Snow - what hasn't TTC ruined?! No seriously the biggest thing for me is SWI. That having to do it is so tedious. That thought that you have to orgasm after the man puts so much pressure. Also agree with lemon and I can't enjoy other peoples announcements anymore. I use to get excited for other people- I am now just bitter and miserable after I hear any news.

So what is everyone's fertility plans for 2012- if those elusive bfps don't show?
I am going to TTC naturally for 6 more months - with a bit of acupuncture thrown in for good measure. We are going to save as much as possible and Around may/June - I will set up a meeting with Argc and I will get immunes checked there prior to ivf. By the time all this takes place I will be well past 2 years of trying and so if all those stats are to be believed, I think I can safely say it ain't going to happen.

Sorry a lot of the above is non sensical - on phone!

Your plan sounds similar to mine joycep so therefore I think it sounds like an excellent plan! We are saving up for IVF, I think we will approach the clinic in May but I have no idea what the waiting list is like and how quickly we can get started. I'm hoping that we will have an ivf cycle at some point during the summer. Of course my real hope is that we get a miracle BFP before that. I know this is unlikely, I understand how low the odds are but I still hope. I am not thinking past the first cycle, I have no idea what we will do if it fails and I know that there is only a 20% chance that it will work but I refuse to think about that yet. One step at a time and all that. I frightened myself yesterday reading something about how pcos makes IVF complicated. My gynae did mention that I would be at risk of over stimulation.

Is your DH still going away with work in the new year joycep? My DH has to go away quite a lot next year, only for a few days at a time but I can guarantee that it will fall at key SWI times.

I feel with your gynae too. Is AF like a normal one? Do you think you did ovulate in the end? I've emailed my gynae today to ask for copies of all my test results, I've not heard back yet.

MIL is really testing my patience at the moment. We're going back to the UK for xmas and it's turning into such a headache. We're with my parents for xmas day and then we're supposed to be going to PIL on boxing day. But now she's moaning that she isn't seeing DH on xmas morning (you'd think he was 5 not 31) and she's saying it would suit her better if we spent xmas day with them because they've been invited to a party on boxing day. I wouldn't mind but we sorted this all out months ago and now she's moaning. Oh well, deep breath. Also, I know she will drop lots of unsubtle hints about wanting grandchildren, I've warned DH that if she does I might blurt everything out which would be certain to shut her up.