Hi Shaninie - I see you have been to Care, which is where we went after many years ttc#1 and after all NHS tests done (~the NHS are good but it took many months of testing once we were first seen). Are Care offering any tests before they suggest IVF, because if not that concerns me. My basic tests were (and not sure how much NHS will offer as they don't fund fertility treatment if you have a child, but will do some testing):
3 day and 21 day bloods
internal examination or scan perhaps
recent smear and chlamydia test (I knew I didn't have an STI but you have to have a test before can have IVF and cheaper to do on NHS!! - your practice nurse can do for you)
a HSG to see if fallopian tubes blocked
At Care they used my NHS tests and did a few more, including AMH test (to see what my egg reserve was like) and a scan to check my follicles.
Also Dh had to do several semen analysis tests and each are 3 months apart (as yes, just because fathered one child doesn't mean that isn't where the issue is). This will also help you know whether IVF or ICSI is right for you.
There are reasons for secondary infertility - and many people go down the immune tests to discover that is the cause and ivf unlikely to work without medication for those issues. You can usually get many level 1 tests done by your gp saving yourself £££ at Care, but need level 2 tests at Care.
Feel free to ignore all of above if you know or it is not relevant for you. Our story is 7yrs ttc, 3yrs on CBFM, NHS testing showing male infertility. Failed ICSI at Care, then we paid for immune testing which showed up issues with me (the main immune people at Care are Mr Patel at Manchester and it was George Nduwke at notts, but he is now in London and Maha has taken over, but not as experiences as the others obviously and she told us to try 2 more cycles before doing Immune testing which we ignored, saving us heartache and £££ as we already had some idea that was our issue due to some illnesses I have etc).
Anyway, there often are reasons for taking longer to conceive a 2nd child, so for me I think lots of tests before self funding IVF may be helpful. After all of this we conceived naturallly, my first ever BFP - due to treating my dh's infertility as much as possible and taking immune meds as soon as got my BFP to prevent miscarriage.
Good luck!!