Assisted Conception (and all the bits in between) volume 8

[lucylookout]

Looks like we need a new thread for Italian, Scrummy, Beginnings, womanly, lissy, rowing, fretfree, Teds77, keziah, frustrated and anyone else who wants to chat about assisted conception!

Chutney - my dh took Menevit supplement, which Care clinic recommended to us. A hassle to get we thought as only from NZ/Australia - but you can get all the component parts in about 6 bottles (the zinc, the lycopene etc) BUT we ordered online, came in a week and costed about £45 for 3 months supply, so was cheaper than buying separately. Also took high dose Vit C, 1000mg. He ate brazil nuts also! We couldn't believe the numbers increase, although did take 12 months!! Yes they can do SSR. Although not great news, if that is the only problem then it means ICSI etc could be very successful for you .

scrummy so sorry re bfn, it is so hard have a cry then try to distract yourself in the seasons fun. Have a few tipples enjoy hubbie and take the stress off yourselves for a month and when you are ready big breath and on. I am sure 2012 will be a good year for you. I am in a way so glad I am testing pre christmas as I have to be cheerful for ds so there will be distractions and no work Yippee. Thinking of you. Sorry am rubbish with words

Thank you so much everybody for your thoughts and words. You are all so lovely. I don't know what I would do without this forum and thread, possibly just go mad. And bugsy there is no such thing as not saying the right thing here. It can be so difficult sometimes to put your thoughts on words when in RL we would probably just want to give someone a hug. We all mean well and what you said was perfect.

DH and I decided to have a little party last night and shared some bubbly with some fab (forbidden) food (soft cheese, chocolate cake...) so feeling a little fragile today but ok. I try my best to put things in perspective and as hurtful as it is each month to get that BFN, I do have so much to be grateful for in life so I'm doing my best to not let it overburden everything. So, the plan is to keep trying for that magical natural BFP and have the immunes done in January. I always had it in my mind that March would be the time for IVF (don't ask me why). Looking at my work commitments and holiday plans for next year March seems like the earliest we could do any treatment and I don't want to waste too much time now for another IUI. Let's face it, I'm not getting any younger.....So, IVF in March it is....if we need it.

Welcome chutney! Re SA, I can give a positive story on that. DH SA wasn't zero, but we had an issue with morphology and motility, with the former at 2% ( on a scale from 6%) and latter at just below acceptable. With diet changes - organic where possible, fish at least once a week, cutting down alcohol to next to nothing (1-2 pints of beer or glasses of wine per month) - and men's conception vitamins (we even went on Fertility Plus for couple of months) his morphology was 20% (on a scale from 15%) and motility 90% last month. It has been consistently improving with time. Did they discuss about him going to see a urologist to see what the reason might be?

Bit of a mammoth post. I hope I didn't bore you too much!

Thanks scrummy. Your 'survival tactics' sound lovely - I think thats the perfect way to pick yourself back up again. You're amazing for being so strong and positive. I really REALLY hope the next stage is successful for you.

Thanks also for your positive story. I'm really trying to remain upbeat in the lead up to the next test results (the 1st week in Jan). Once we've got those results I think i'll be able to more sensibly pull together a battle plan (like the healthy eating and diet tips you mention). At the moment it all seems so uncertain and frankly, depressing! (hence LOTS of eating and drinking!!)

At the moment having an option of going to IVF would be a relief as it would mean there was something for us to work with on DH's side. Gosh - its scary how quickly we've gone from 'just trying' and keeping patient - to despair and hoping iVF is an option!

Anyway - dont want to end on a low note. Thanks again for all the adivce i've received so far and lets hope some Christmas magic rubs off on us all!

Chutney, I think it's a good plan to just enjoy Christmas and deal with the next results when they come, but just to throw my tuppence worth in as well; my Dh also had high abnormality (98%) and after 3 months of taking a men's fertility supplement (I'm sure any would do, but we used 'Fertility Support for Men' by Marilyn Glenville for the Natural Health Practice, can be found on Amazon, in Whole foods), so if SA isn't absolutely zero, there are very effective and easy ways of improving it. You could start him on the supplements now and it could only help things, definitely not do any harm...

You've had a lot to take in, in a short space of time, but even though you might not have had the news you wanted, it has at least now been identified as the reason why you haven't got pregnant so far, and something can and will be done about it, and you will get your BFP soon.

Scrummy I love the sound of your party. Good for you, you sound like you are being very positive and optimistic. Have you had a review with ARGC yet? I do think that immunes would be a good idea, given that you've had at least two months of absolute spot on sperm-in-the-right-place timing. Here's to a wonderful 2012 for you (and IVF in March, could mean a Christmas 2012 baby! )

Bugsy thinking of you.

Lissy are you around? Hope all's good with you. I was just wondering when ARGC stopped your clexane injections and cyclogest pessaries. I'm on 3 cyclogest a day and 1 clexane. I'm not complaining at all, in any way, as I'm sure they're in part responsible for getting this pregnancy going, but over the last few days I have thought to myself how nice it would be to not have to take them anymore. Just wondering what your experience was.

I'm doing OK. Next scan on Friday, when all being well, I'll be nearly 10 weeks

scrummy- Sweetie, I'm sorry to hear about your BFN. But it seems to me that you really have your (for lack of a better word) shit together. I'm glad you're remaining positive, and that you and your DH have formulated a plan. It's so easy to get mired in time scales, and we have all been so impatient over this process, but it sounds to me that you're keeping a level head in terms of planning. I wound up postponing my IVF cycle (I'm sure you've heard this)...I could've started in February, but would've gotten my BFP just in time to go to Hawaii, so we waited until we got back. I'm glad we did...

Josie- Glad to hear your HSG went well. Hope the discomfort has eased off, and have a great time over the holidays

chutney- Welcome! You'll really enjoy this forum, as the ladies are so incredibly supportive, and knowledgeable! As far as your DH's sperm count, my husband had to have a TESA due to his condition (he is a T3-T5 paraplegic), and we managed to get 12 vials of viable sperm. What's amazing about that is that he had been in a chair for eight years (and therefore hadn't ejaculated in eight years). I second the supplements and the healthy eating, it seems to have worked for loads of ladies on this thread.

lucy- Ugh, three pessaries a day! I only had to take two, and they weaned me off of them around 23 weeks. TBH, I hadn't been taking them for a while anyway, because my piles were so bad (TMI!) I think they'll want you to continue the clexane until you're 30 weeks or so, but again, I stopped taking them because they messed up my stomach something fierce. May I recommend arnica cream for the bruising? That stuff really works great! Yay for 10 weeks!!!

bugsy- Hope you're hanging in there, love...

pocket- How are you feeling?

Keziah- Hope you're recovered from your illness, and that you're feeling good...

Waves and chocolate boobs to everyone else!

AFM, back to the midwife tomorrow for a follow up appointment re: gestational diabetes. I've been testing four times a day, and so far the only reading that has been giving me trouble is after breakfast. Haven't cheated, and I'm really missing the chocolate and ice cream. Argh. Also have an appointment with the physio to try and ease some of the groin and pubic pain. Neighbors are still unbelievable assholes, and we've now had a solicitor draft a letter to see if there's anything that can be done.

dear bugsy not sure when you're testing but sending you lots of positive vibes for you Christmas BFP. go embies go xx

bugsy hope you're ok darling. Is it test day yet? Thinking of you

Lucy haven't had a follow-up yet. Will see about getting an appointment when the immune test results come back. Did they book this automatically? wow, nearly 10 weeks tomorrow

lissy Hope your appointments with mid-wife and physio go ok today. And here's hoping your neighbours calm down over the holiday period. Thanks for your thoughts on the timings too. I know it may not always feel like it, but March will be here in no time. And yes, I'd like to think I've got my shit together too right now

pocket How you are you doing symptom wise?

chutney I can assure you it isn't always easy to stay positive, but I'm in a good place in my life right now and I really do think it is just a matter of time for us. There have been times when I have felt quite the opposite, so I'm taking nothing for granted. Lucy has good advise about starting vits now rather than later....are you with NHS? I just find that they should be looking at making an appointment with a urologist first before talking about anything else. They should try and find out why his count would be zero. Who knows, they may even be able to treat that. Our GP suggested that straight away after our first test. I hope you both can still enjoy the festivities and most of all, be good to each other.

italian have the santa duties finished yet?

sunnyg in answer to your earlier question, I'm sad that it's another Xmas with no BFP, but feel positive about next year.

Josie hope you've recovered from your HSG and glad to hear you didn't find it too bad.

Hi to keziah and teds

scrummy I think its lovely that you and DH had a little party and lissy's right, it does sound like you've got your sht together which is great. 2012 has a big tag with your name on it! xxx

Lucy how lovely that you'll get to see/hear jeanie again tomorrow, before Christmas. Hope all is going well and she's growing big and strong (just realised that I've said 'she', decided not to change it, I wonder if I'm right?)

lissy hope your midwife and physio appointments go well. Boo hiss to your awful neighbours, when will they receive the solicitor's letter? I really hope that does the trick

sunnyg my fingers and toes are still crossed go embies go

No news really from me really - i feel rather normal other than a bloated tummy (akin to having too much bread) and slightly sore boobs. But otherwise, its almost like nothing has happened. Famous last words, give it a couple of weeks and i'm sure the morning sickness will kick in and i'll be eating my words?

lots of love and Christmassyness to everyone

xxx

Scrummy so sorry to hear your news ((hugs)) but am glad you have a plan for 2012. It didn?t get rid of the underlying sadness but after our failed cycle, DH and I devised our plan and then had three lovely weeks of treats before our follow-up appointment. Things still hurt but I remember feeling very loved. So I?m hoping that the Christmas Elves wrap you and Mr Scrummy up in lots of love for the next few weeks.

bugsy thinking of you too today.

lucy hope you enjoy your scan tomorrow ? am a little bit

Lissy hope your appointments go well and am wishing your neighbours a visit from the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come?

Josie glad the HSG went well. I?m a high FSH/low AMH lady. I only got two fertilised eggs and right now they are both growing little beans! Age and quality turned out to be on my side ? and I think I may be a good 6/7 years older than you xx.

Welcome Chutney. You?ve had loads of good advice already but just to add my two pence?s worth? DH?s count wasn?t zero but was very low - 0.2 million/ml. Combined with poor responses to stims we lived by the mantra that we only needed one egg and one sperm and knew that one sperm might have to come by surgical retrieval ? though it didn?t in the end. I hope that you get some good advice on 2 Jan and hopefully because of ICSI you?ll be in business.

Pocket famous last words indeed! I am, err, ?embracing? the symptoms here. I spent so many months cursing moaning pg ladies that I am determined not to become one!

Special to Keziah sunnyg Italian and weller and anyone else I have missed.

So very Happy BFP!!! Obviously nervous especially after m/c in Summer but delighted to have passed another hurdle.

Well off to do xmas shopping today as we are in a tip, not wrapped/ bought cards not done but no really excuse but. Tried the green bottle spiced fruits good bit sweet will try adding lime/lemon and I do love mulled wine so thanks for the suggestion as a great compromise.

Bugsy, congratulations on your BFP! What fantastic news! Of course you're nervous, it's natural, but you are over a first, big, big hurdle. And you've had your share of bad luck so I'm sure it'll go smoothly from here on in. Good luck with your Christmas shopping!

bugsy congratulations. What a wonderful Christmas present!

merry Christmas everybody see you again in 2012! Thanks again for all your support this year. You're all marvellous!

Wow congratulations bugsy wonderful news

Merry Christmas everyone, thanks so much for all your support and advice and may lots of fabulous things come to you all in 2012

xxx

wooo hooo! A big Christmas congratulations to you bugsy. That is the most fantastic news.

Merry, Merry Christmas everyone. I haven't been here long, but already I feel better from all of your support and just having people that don't judge, but understand, and always show interest.

Wherever you are and whatever you are doing over the festive period I hope you have a wonderful time.

See you all in 2012 oxox

bugsy fantastic news and what a lovely Christmas pressie for you both

More good news makes me feel really positive for the new year and my treatment and I hope 2012 brings everyone here what they wish for. Happy Christmas all

YAY BUGSY!!!!:):):):)

Happy Holidays to everyone!!!

Congratulations bugsy what wonderful news - and a perfect excuse to take it easy over the hols .

What a wonderful Christmas present bugsy

Happy Christmas to all too xx.

Bugsy CONGRATULATIONS.

Thanks for the kind wishes to me, I am not Santa, sadly, but if I were it would be babies all round.

To all the lovely assisted conception ladies MERRY CHRISTMAS to ALL

Hi all

Had a great day, got cooked a yummy meal and lots of fab presents. I also read an article reminding me that we eat this meal only once a year! Actually had an extra one this year but that is still under 50 times in my life! Compared to frozen pizza, which apparently most of us have had 500 times!

Anyway, have a good one.

Hi All

Hope you all had a fab Christmas Day!

Had a few days to ponder the coming year, so apologies in advance if this post is going to be a bit 'all about me'.

Inspired by scrummy's positive and planned approach for 2012 myself and DH also have been thinking about making some firm plans, instead of meandering along. Whilst I'm the first to lecture about taking it one step at a time, as another Christmas has passed childless I feel more and more determined for next Christmas to be different. I'm sure you all understand that.

So...... I've been thinking and researching a lot into egg-sharing. As myself being the egg sharer with IVF. A quick review on my CV for you all: Myself 34, DH 37. Diagnosed male fertility issues and since had 1 unsuccessful IUI. TTC now 2.5 years. Due to start next IUI (nhs) hopefully in next 4 weeks. Despite all of this I think I may just meet all criteria for being an egg-sharer and our consultant did say I had a 'good follicle reserve' (wooo hoo!) which I imagine would bode well.

So why the rush into egg sharing? Well it wouldn't really be a rush, but the more I've read, and the more I've learnt from you ladies, especially those that have been or are undergoing being egg recipitants, and the more I express this journey, the more I agree with the principles of it. If I can help someone else out whilst also hopefully achieving my own goal then why not?

And obviously getting very close to the age limit (35 in June) has now put this at the forefront of our minds. I wouldn't do anything before at least giving the next cycle of NHS funded IUI ago as that should be really soon. But given that I doubt we could afford IVF privately, and that may be where we are heading, and I'm not sure how long I would need to wait for IVF on the NHS (also all those rumours with the cuts it may be harder and harder to get) I don't know it just seems maybe the way?!?!

Any thoughts, suggestions, concerns, stories would be gratefully received.

At the very least I thought DH and I could go along to one of the info sessions at one of the london egg-sharing clinics. Anyone got any advice on which clinic has the best reputation? I know in London there is The London Women's Clinic, The Lister, CRM, the Bridge and perhaps the Lister?

Sorry for long-winded message!

Waves to you all!

Hi everyone

Hope you're all surviving Christmas and managing to keep the Quality Street more at arms length than I am

Sunnyg i absolutely loved your post and i think its all a brilliant idea. My hat is off to you for being so kind to think of someone else. As a donor egg recipient i can vouch for just how thankful someone will be for your gorgeous eggs - its an incredible gift and one so gratefully received. You are a total star!

I did all of my treatment with Dr Venkat at HSFC (www.hsfc.org.uk/). They work with other clinics for egg share so i'm guessing that somehow there's a network of matching donors and recipients - but i'm sure a call to any clinic would clarify. During my treatment I had egg share paperwork for Herts & Essex Fertility (btw they offer free IVF for egg share hertsandessexfertility.com/Treatment-Options/Fees/Free-IVF-Treatment.aspx) and the Lister (which is where Dr Venkat did my actual transfer - the team there were also great).

Another place that may be of interest is Altrui who match donor and recipient(www.altrui.co.uk/) - in the early days of my info searching, I found these guys and had a long phone conversation with Alison Bagshaw who runs it. She was incredibly helpful and although I didn?t go this route (donor and recipient journeys are different), she may be worth a quick call. I think she works out of a number of London clinics...

I am naturally impatient so I would always go for the speediest route, why have a long wait if you can jump the queue through egg share? Might even be worth making a few calls soon just to understand how the clinics work, their donor/recipient matching times, whether they have any recipients waiting (I'm sure they will have), get their paperwork etc.

Its great for you to have this as a back up, but you know you wont need it as your next round of IUI is going to work and you'll have that BFP by the end of January anway xxx

Teds sorry you've got lots of symptoms, I've read that those expecting twins often suffer more. Hopefully mine will kick in soon (am starting to get a bit worried) and that will alleviate yours

No news from me - I cant wait until my scan next week when I hope I'll find out everything is fine? I've found this wait harder than 2ww!!!

Big hello to everyone

xxx

Sunny, I think it's a brilliant idea too. We all know how grateful we would be for someone else's eggs in order to have a child, and also how much we would look after them. It's a great plan and a really positive way to start the year. In terms of clinics I had my IUI at CRM (through viveka) and wasn't particularly taken with them. The lister on the other hand seemed much more caring and very thorough. The lister has an open evening once a month, maybe you should go to that, and enquire as to whether CRM has something similar.

Pocket, how many weeks are you now? Try to not worry too much about symptoms, with ds I was absolutely fine throughout, i was really lucky. Not long til that first scan now and you'll see all is fine with the bean.

Hi to everyone else too. I hope you all had a very peaceful and lovely Christmas x