Assisted Conception (and all the bits in between) volume 8

[lucylookout]

Looks like we need a new thread for Italian, Scrummy, Beginnings, womanly, lissy, rowing, fretfree, Teds77, keziah, frustrated and anyone else who wants to chat about assisted conception!

fishfingersarnie and bugsylugs welcome. fishfingersarnie sorry things are looking a bit glum at the moment, it will get better I am sure.

Josie sounds really positive meeting with your friend. Good idea to be alone in case you do get upset.

Pocket maybe you are imagining it. Maybe you should throw her off the sent. Come in eating a Krispy Kreme donut and just say, Blimey I can?t stop eating these lovely things I am putting on weight! If she dares say anything about babies, just smile and say, I?m going to start doing aerobics at home.

joycep not sure about your treatment but mine was a matter of starting to take the drugs and then being scanned and the actual final date for egg retrieval and embryo transfer were not decided until they saw how my body was responding, or in my case the donor?s body was responding, so for me we were coordinating more than one person! Personally, I would say do not tell work unless you want to. You could come up with a family crisis, a holiday that takes you away for two whole weeks or something like that, or you could say you have a medical situation but not say what it is. I?ve never told work why I needed the time off and I?ve had masses of treatment! But not everyone?s work is as flexible as mine. I tried hard to work so work things were sorted before treatment, I have arranged to work from home at times and that means I can work at home to suit me. As I say, not everyone?s work is so flexible. Many of these scan appointments are very short, 15 or 20 minutes so I could fit it into a lunch break or before work (my clinic opens early). For my final treatment I will tell them I am going on holiday!

mojangles hope it will all be working out whatever way.

Lucy, so pleased that all is well.

Weller, I really do hope we will be cycle buddies.

Lissy, Keziah, Rowing and all ? hugs, honeys.

My clinic consultant appointment was fine. I am not really sure what I thought they would be able to say but I didn't think it was this! I knew I had a fibroid and my consultant says that it has got a bit bigger and there is a really small chance that it is hampering things. So I can have a hysteroscopy (if my GP can recommend it) on the NHS. This is a camera in the uterus. After an angiogram I had a while back I feel it is no biggie! If they did find some big problem and wanted to remove my fibroid then it would be major surgery and would mean six weeks off work and three months recovery! I am a bit scared of that!

I talked about having the Chicago immunes test with the consultant, that is £1,000 and takes 6 weeks. I have talked about it before at the clinic. The consultant and my hubby were not keen on the test but now are both saying maybe it would be worth doing!

I am kind of scared. Scared of the hysteroscopy because that might mean finding out something bad about my uterus and having surgery. Also scared about the Chicago test, either I will be OK and it will be a total waste of £1K or I'll discoverer I have a problem - in which case it is £400 a go for Intralipids. I am just scared too it will be a case of I was right all along and we should have had them all along! I am kind of scared to know!

Lastly I am scared that none of my embies will survive the thaw and all this will be in vain. I am just being over dramatic but there is a real chance of this happening. I am almost resigned to it not ever working.

On the positive side I do feel as if we are coming to the end and I am ready for it all to come to a natural end now and us to move on.

Hugs to all

Can I get a reminder how many of you have had Intralipids or immunes drugs and got pregnant because of them either with IVF or without, please?

Chocolate boobs to everyone! and hugs and baby dust to all.

Dear Italian buer that fibroid. I'm sorry about your results and I can understand why you're worried. When will you decide whether to go to GP re the hysteroscopy or Chicago immunes (pardon my ignorance but does one mean you dont need to do the other?). What sort of timings are you working to? Lots of love and luck to you dear Italian. We're here if you need our support.

bugsy, good news about your 6 day scan and best of luck with your scan today, let us know how you get on - work sucks but as you say, hey ho!

arnie, sending positive vibes to those follies and tonnes of luck for your scan tomorrow.

I'm now confirmed for 5 day blastocyst on Saturday

Hi all,
sorry I'm in hiding, but just popped on to say hi! I'm sure you have worked out that I had a bfn on test day. I would have been straight on here if a miracle had occurred, but it didn't.
Italian if you can afford it, I would have the tests done personally. We are cleaned out now and I'm having a break from the whole thing, plus horrible cold. I just wanted to say that you can have intralipids for less than £400. There is a company, name of which escapes me, which visits you at home and, I think, it is just under £300, possibly £285?
I'm going to disappear for a bit, just can't think about AC right now, can't decide if it is definitely over or just one more....better get carbooting to raise funds though!
Huge hugs to everyone, you are all lovely, lovely, lovely. Mwah!

Italian - gosh that sounds confusing. It might be worth finding out more about the fibroid as depending on where the embryo implants I think it can increase miscarriage risk or can cause problems in pregnancy for some people. I had intralipids - 3 after a bfp (as it was a natural bfp) although the clinic did say 2 should be ok (I erred on side of caution) and it cost £285 each time, done at home at time to suit me by Healthcare at home. I know I needed immune drugs and intralipids have enabled my bfp to continue into pregnancy. But it all depends on what the tests say.

rowing you take good care of you, and hope you can enjoy Christmas with your family.

Rowing massive hugs to you.

Yes, Rowing - Keziah says Healthcare at home for at home interlipids, will defo give them a go. Keziah were you at Care, I am too but a different one to you, wonder what they will think if I say I want to go with Healthcare at home!

Pocket I really REALLY doubt fibroid is anything to do with it and would definitly like to go for Chicago test NOW but just persuading DH! Think consultant has thrown this fibroid thing in at last minute after years of treatment during which I have had a fibroid and feel vaguely cross but hey ho. I am not sure wht to think. What i do not want to do is wait 4 weeks, until New Year then end up waiting again to get a look at fibroid, then get told it is not relevant and then go for Chicago test 6 weeks after I needed to and end up delaying treatment but another month or two, Just too bloody tired for all that. I can't see fibroid is issue but just want to humour doctor and hubby. Bloody fed up really but no choice because if I don't check I won't know!

Italian I was with Care and they didn't do intralipids there so they actually told us about HealthCare at Home and it was them that booked our first one (in less than 48hrs after a surprise bfp!) so doubt they will mind. I was under George Nduwke and it was him who wrote to our Gp (the immune consultant and medical director of the Care we were at) to see what they would prescribe on the NHS for us. Just ask them for a private prescription if you need Intralipids. The actual product is not expensive at all, so there is a big mark up on nursing cost. They are a business at the end of the day (charged us £300 just because got pregnant naturally!) and if they are not competitive - tough!

Italian I know someone who is now pregnant, naturally, after 4 miscarriages and clomid and was awaiting NHS IVF which the NHS counsultant said she needed. Wasn't till she was pregnant she found out she had a fibroid (which is now large and means she has to be delivered at 36 weeks) which they said was what probably caused the miscarriages. Strange - the NHS funded clomid, would fund IVF, funded miscarriage tests and they now think it was the fibroid. Remember Italian your embies are frozen, so if there is a delay they are not getting older.

Italian how confusing can you do both at the same time then there would be no delay but I guess possibly more expense? How very frustrating for you.

Am not sure when they start doing immune tests etc is it after 3rd miscarriage? kezia George Nduwke has now left care!!!

arnie good luck with the scan tomorrow. Now listen you little follicles buck up your ideas and give your mum a break grow grow grow.

Scan today not bad felt a bit more deflated no real reason probably just tired from getting up at silly o'clock. Please tell me I am being daft. Think there are 5 on rt 4 on left maybe 4 and 4. rt 14mm, then rest between 9 and 12mm, left similar but no one in front. Am worried the bigger one wil cause problems I realise the others and numbers ok for an oldie. Lining thick hope not too thick. They seemed pleased next scan on sat same dose

Hello dearies

So sorry I have been a bit absent. Been spending quite a bit time with my friend over from home who just MC last week. Poor pet is very strong though.
Lucy so glad all is well with the bean!
Italian - you poor thing. Gosh you really do have alot to think about.
Rowing - very very sorry about your BFN.
Pocket - best of luck for your blasto on Sat!
Scrummy - a natural IUI sounds good. Do you feel different to be med free?
Arnie - best of luck for your scan darl.

AF turned up right on cue on offical test day. So it's a definite BFN for me this cycle. I'm fine, was quite prepared for it.

Hugs to all oxox

Wellerbabe have a lovely time in the Maldives. I've lost track a bit. Is next DE cycle January?

Italian it might not be the advice you want to hear, or even necessarily prudent, but I would get everything done (fibroid removed, Chicago testing etc). If this is your last go, you don't want to be left thinking 'what if'.

Rowing lovely to hear from you, take care of yourself and hope to maybe see you on here again soon.

Bugsy the scan results sound good. Even if you 'lose' one for being too big/mature, you've got lots of other ones all at a similarish size. Good luck with the scan tomorrow.

Sunnyg sorry to hear about your definite BFN, but glad you are OK about it. When's the next cycle? After Christmas?

Pocket yay! Good luck for tomorrow's transfer. How many are you going for?

Fishfingers any news?

No news for me . Things seem to be moving along OK and am back in next Wednesday for next scan.

bugsy here they do miscarriage/immune tests on NHS after 3 confirmed mc's. Yes, sadly George has left Care - meaning London is now where many Immune docs are, grrr.... if not live anywhere near London!!

Hope scans continue to go well for people.

Hi all, got my letter from the hospital a couple of days ago so on day 1 of my next period I have to ring and arrange my HSG so hopefully I can get it done and get the results before xmas, I want to know either way. I had an awful dream about it last night though and now I'm absolutely terrified!!! Pg friend posted a piccy of her 'bump' on fb even though she's only 11 weeks. Got her scan next week, it's going to be very hard.

Chins up girls (easier said than done I know)

Dearest Rowing, sending you the hugest hug and wishing you all the luck in the world with whatever you do next xxx

arnie how was the scan today? Got everything crossed for you

Italian wow you've got lots to consider - could you/would you just go for it and test everything? x

Bugsy good luck with scan tomorrow. Hang on in there, all the poking and prodding will be worth it. Deep breaths...

Sorry about your BFN sunnyg, are you going to go straight for another this/next month?

josie chin up to you too, hang on in there and before long you'll be the one showing off your scan pic. Good luck with your pre-Christmas tests

Hello to everyone else next post frome will be post DET YIKES

pocket sending snuggly baby box vibes for tomorrow and a special dose of dignity for the legs akimbo moment

rowing also sending ((hugs)) and hope you're okay with whatever happens next.

sunnyg more ((hugs)) for you too xx

italian lovely to hear from you. I think like lucy I'd be tempted to do everything so that you go for FET with every t crossed/i dotted sort-of-thing.

arnie hoping that there's some action at your scan and bugsy good luck for tomorrow.

Waves to all you other ladies. Weekend. Whoop.

Morning all, fingers crossed for those of you getting to the exciting/scary stages! I hope you all get the results you're hoping for!

Just to warn you that this will be a long post as I've had some bad news and need to get a few things off my chest and hoefully draw some positives from those of you that may have been in a similar position...

Our ICSI cycle was cancelled yesterday due to my lack of response to the Menopur. On my right ovary I only had one follicle at 16mm, the rest were 10mm or less. Yet again, my left ovary went into hiding so I have no idea how many follicles there could have been, but they said that even if they went for EC, it would be too risky to try and poke about to find it.
They also found 'something' on my right ovary and they couldn't determine what 'it' is, even after asking a few other doctors. They guess that this 'something' is about 5cm big but they weren't able to see it properly.
Off I went for a couple of blood tests (one for renal function and one to check certain proteins in my blood, ie, to check if this thing is something bad) and I'm also waiting for an appointment for an abdominal MRI scan.
They also passed comment that I seemed to have slightly less eggs than I should have for someone my age (32) - why did they not mention this sooner??!!

So......to say we're gutted is an understatement. The reason we were having ICSI was due to DH's sperm results so I (selfishly, naively) assumed that I was absolutely fine and now we know that I'm not.

They have said that this is not the end of the road and that should we decide to try again that they will have me on a higher dose of Menopur from the start. However, I was on the high dose (4 ampules) for a week on this cycle and only got one follicle so what difference will it make having the high dose for another few days on the next?
Should we be thinking about going elsewhere for treatment as we just went with where our GP referred us to, but as we are paying for it all then we have the freedom to choose where we go, right?
What if we have to go down the donor egg route? I don't know how I'd feel about that......although I'd give anything to experience being pregnant and give us the child that we want to complete our family (DH already has 3 kids)....but then would it be in the back of my head that part of the child isn't mine? Would that matter?

As you can see, I have a lot of questions but I just want to get over the hurdle of this growth they've found and take it from there.
If any of you can offer any words of wisdom they would be much appreciated as at the moment I just can't stop crying.....

Tis done. Went just for one as that was a strong recommend from consultant and embryologist. Thank you for all your kind wishes. Will let you know result.

Lots of love and luck to you all

arnie I'm so, so sorry to hear about your news. To get two big blows like that on one go must have been so hard. ((())) I havent been in the same situation as you, but I suspect that if I was, I would probably want to get a second consult at least on the drug response. But that should be secondary, as you really do need o find out what this growth thing is. Let's hope it's just a cyst and nothing more. And yes, you can choose whatever clinic you wish. I hope you ave lots of support available to you. Look after yourself.

rowing glad to hear from you. Totally understand wanting to go into hiding. I hope life brings you lots of joy and happiness, whatever you choose.

pocket best of luck. We'll try and entertain you during the 2ww as best we can. Anything special planned for distraction?

sunnyg although you're kind of ready or it, it still sucks. ((())) I'm much more relaxed and obviously without any hormonal side effects (DH might disagree, but hey), not that I had many on Clomid either. Haven't really given TTC much thought this week, but I'm sure that will change next week

bugsy hope the scan went ok today.

Italian I can understand your frustration. I would feel the same and would pose the question to them next time you see them. I would agree with Lucy though and get everything checked, so at least you've one everything you can.

Lucy no news is good news

Hello to everyone else - lissy keziah mojangles teds weller beginnings joycep Josie

Heading for my CD10 scan on Monday. Not quite sure what to expect seen as it is a drug free cycle.

arnie you poor love - I'm so sorry to hear your news. This whole journey is a very emotional one and you just have to take one day at a time (sorry that sounds cheesy). Cry today if you need to - that's perfectly normal.

Do go for a second opinion, so you know where you are (I had to, as have a few of us). And even if you have a low egg count, your eggs are young which is good. A clinic can help with all the other bits but young eggs are a huge plus on your side.

In terms if where to go for a second opinion, many of the girls on this thread really rate ARCG. I also understand the Lister is good. I'm with Harley Street Fertility Clinic (the one on Devonshire street, not the other one), Dr Venkat is amazing and I've had a positive and personal experience so far - also she got a friend of mine pregnant when she had just one egg!

I'd recommend calling a few clinics and just chatting to them about where you are and see what they say. You'll get a feeling for who you warm too and then you can take it from there.

Don't worry about egg donor for now - wait until you know your own results. And if at a later date you want to look into it, a few if us have done it. I know your concerns about this, for me it was my only option so I've done all the soul searching and i managed to get my head round it, so i am here if you want to chat about that later on.

Good luck to you dear arnie here if you need us.

X

pocket glad to hear you have your embie on board

arnie so very sorry to hear your news. So much to take in so hope you and DH are looking after each other. I think get the growth looked at and sorted out but definitely get a second opinion about your next cycle.

We started this journey because of DH's low sperm count and it then became clear that my ovaries were wrinkly for my age (I was 33 now 34). Three months ago, after our failed ICSI cycle, our consultant told us we were 'scrapping the bottom of the barrel' with my eggs (he even drew a helpful diagram to demonstrate... ).

So we switched hospital, found a consultant who was honest and said that we might have to look at donor eggs one day, but in her opinion we ought to give ourselves a good few chances with my eggs first as age was on my side, and here we are with a bfp. I was on high doses throughout and with both my cycles I only got 3 eggs - but you only need one.

Of course the odds aren't as good as they might be but I don't think you can tell very much from one cycle. I'd also look at other clinic options and can definitely recommend the Lister if you are in or near London. Like pocket says, I wouldn't worry about a donor just yet. In the back of mind I know that if my little bean doesn't stick or if it does and we want a second child etc then that might be the best option for us but I would definitely get a second opinion first.

xx

So sorry to hear that Arnie, I can't imagine how you must be feeling. I have also been told that my ovaries are about ten years older than they should be and I have had a blood test to see if my egg reserves are low (I didn't have as many as they would have expected when I had a scan recently) but my consultant was very optimistic and said that it only takes one egg so even though you might not have as many, it is definitely still possible. As to a donor egg, I suppose it's something you would have to think long and hard about, but cross that bridge if you come to it, until then, find out what the growth is (could just be a simple cyst) and take it from there

Arnie so sorry to hear that. Have you had the AMH test to check ovarian reserve? If the clinic say that they would increase menopur next time then my question to them would be - "during this cycle when you scanned me why didn't you notice that there were a lack of follicles/eggs and increase my dose during this cycle to give us every chance of eggs to retrieve?" (that is what clinics can do). As for medication you will find there is more than menopur - such as Gonal F. My consultant used menopur (we got 5 eggs) but he has moved clinic and I notice that he doesn't use Menopur at all now. Hope some time helps and definitely consider other clinics if you don't feel happy with that one. If you can get to London easily there seems good choice there, I have heard good things about Manchester Care (they do free open evenings at all Care so give you a chance to ask questions without paying!!) and there are Care clinics elsewhere in the middle of the country.

arnie please try not to worry. I agree with Pocket not to worry about donor eggs stuff yet. I know it is easier said than done. What is the plan with this growth, are they investigating, when will you know? For a start I would say that whatever is wrong it is only one ovary so the other may well be able to produce normally but they need to figure out what the problem is with the one first. I am sure it will not come to donor eggs but if it did it seems that people feel just as excited about being parents to a baby conceived that way. My dear that may not be at all necessary so please try and be calm, get as much info from the docs and see what the next step is. Praying all will be well for you in every sense.

teds, how heartless your consultant sounds drawing the diagram! I do think they sometimes forget we have feelings, we are not science students!

POCKET HONEY thinking of you. - by the way did you go for two or one???

Rowing big hugs to you.

bugsylugs, all the best with your follicles.

Weller am confused, are you to have a donor egg cycle? All the very best.

Lucy thanks, but no need to remove fibroid if it is not in the way (apparently). How are you?

Josie good luck, it will be fine. We say ?chins up? in our family as we all have round chins!

sunnyg so sorry.

Scrummy, hugs to you.

bugsylugs we did not have a lot of miscarriages (only one) but my failure to get pregnant with four embryos on two occasions (I mean two on each occasion) is what has made me wonder because with donor eggs the eggs would have been a lot younger than me!).

Hugs to lissy, mojangles, beginnings and joycep. Hope I have not missed anyone. Apologies if I have. Thinking of you Londonlottie, PerfectDromedary, late, Val, and Horton if you do ever look in on us.

Regards to any lurk-ers (those who read and do not post).

Keziah, Lucy, Pocket, Teds, Scrummy, sunnyg and bugsylugs thanks for caring. I think I must have the Chicago test, my DH says he doesn't think I will feel happy until I have had it. Apologies to all who have had the Chicago test - who has by the way?? - but I kind of feel like it is flushing £1,000 down the loo but if I don't do it I will regret it.

I am worried none of my embies will survive the thaw and the dream of having another baby is very much slipping away. I just want it all to come to an end but don't feel really able to discuss it with friends in real life any more. I know people mean well but often say things like 'Maybe it is not meant to be', which is very, painfully, obvious but I don't yet feel able to get off this not-so-merry-go-round!

Keziah thanks for your very kid words and your thoughts. I guess my concern is that I am getting older not that Serentis, Jenever and May are! I know it sounds so selfish but I am desperate to have the treatment before I have another birthday or more to the point I want to have a baby before my DD has another birthday. I just don?t want to wait any longer, 6 years is enough! I feel. Also, if it fails we will need to wait six months before we can even look into adoption! I know it sounds petty but so tired of life being on hold to some degree!

Feeling very creaky and old and not sure how I would even cope with being pregnant again. Ironically, our next option would be adoption and for this I would need to be healthy and fit too!

Want to move onto adoption without all this but can't turn back now.

On a lighter note, has anyone tried the Asda luxurious range. I am dead curious, is it as good as they say in the advert??

Hugs to all