TTC for 10+ months, part 3

[joycep]

The other thread was just about to fill up and so here we are again with a slightly different name now as many of us have been trying for well over 12 cycles now. We had a few great successes on Part 2, with a couple of people getting bfp's on their 17th and 19th month of trying. So let's hope for more successes on Part 3. (Moaning, crying, sadness, anxiety & bitterness is certainly allowed on here!)

It is quiet at the moment. I've been away with work but am yet again in my post-ov/pre-af slump, and have been feeling too gloomy to post really.

I now always start spotting at 3DPO, this lasts for about a week until AF arrives so I have no luteal phase to speak of - it means I end up feeling like Eeyore for the last ten days of my cycle, nothing can pick me up. I hate feeling like this - need to figure out a way of feeling brighter - 10 days out of 30 is too long to be miserable! mrsd - it must be hormonal, it feels like there's no control over it, no matter how much I tell myself feeling miserable won't make a difference, I still can't snap out of it.

izzy - Sounds like you had a rough time of it after your daughter was born. Losing weight is so tough - you've taken the hardest step though, and a 5lbs loss is great!

On a proactive note (in the absence of medical appts), I've been looking at Clearblue fertility monitor today - has anyone got experience with this? Is it worth it? Also took a look at the DuoFertility monitor - until I realised the price, not sure I'd get away with that particular purchase!!

Ladygee - i diod justify a dufoertility monitor but really don't think it was worth the money. A lot of what you pay for is their 'dedicated support' which was really good to be fair, as in they responded to emails quickly etc. However, most of my questions were about using the monitor so I wouldn't have had to ask the questions if I hadn't had the monitor. Anyhoooo, I came to the conclusion that if you can be bothered to wake up at the same time every morning and take your own temp, then doing that and using fertility friend would be a much more cost efficient way of achieving much the same thing.

Having said that, we did get pg while using the duofertility monitor but in the cycle we conceived I felt it hindered us more than helped as it kept retrospectively changing when it said I had ovulated (eg it said i had ovulated on monday say, then on sunday decided 'oh no you haven't'. Well we could have easily stopped SWI by 6dpo so it was more in spite of the monitor than because of it that we actually got there. I'm still not sure when I ovulated that month, and my scan dates seem to suggest the earlier date which made it all just a bit confusing. DH was all for complaining and saying we wanted our money back but then once we had actually got pg, that wasn't really feasible, even if we got pg without their help!

I wish I had bought a clearblue instead. Duofertility is good for confirming that you are ovulating (as I think temps are the most reliable thing to track it apparently) but it wasn't actually that good for predicting when you were going to ovulate. I never tried a clearblue but I think that sounds better at predicting.

Sorry, I know you didn't really ask if anyone had had the duofertility one, but thought I'd put my two penneth in anyway. Hope you don't mind. Happy to answer any questions you have on it though?

Greetings all. Nice to see you on here biscuits as always, is it your next scan soon?

Big love to you izzy but it is still early. The whiteness of the stick is horrid. I don't do them anymore now until fertility friend tells me to do a test. That still ended up being a let down last month tho! The one I did at the hospital last week didn't feel so bad because I knew I couldn't be preggers at all. I still looked at the line with contempt though! I can I imagine how much this cycle means to you cos it's been a good un, so I'm keeping everything crossed for you.

lady gee I know what you mean about the spotting making you feel blue. For me, they are shitty days because you still have your period ahead of you and know it's a dud month but implantation bleeding messes with my head. Hold on in there. I know quite a few people who had spotting but got pregnant with little trouble, even though I worry about it, I think it's pretty common.

mrsden it is quiet at the mo. But I'm here often, so if anyone feels lonely or chatty then just say, cos o can talk all day! I am ten dpo and have sore boobs. Am monitoring symptoms carefully. Pretty much the same as every other month but also plenty of things I'd be obsessing over if we were in with a chance. Unless I feel dramatically different when I finally get pregnant I don't think I'll ever know in the two week wait. And we WILL all get pregnant. Lets keep boosting each other up. It's just a longer endurance of patience for us!! Or not, depending on my mood!

Hi biscuits - Thanks for your advice - that's really helpful and most welcome!

I should have asked if anyone had used it as, at first glance, it sounded like it ticks a lot of the boxes for me. Mainly that I hate waking up and laying there with a thermometer in my mouth every morning! But your experience answers the main question that I had about how it predicts your fertility. I'm assuming it needs to build up data over time to be able to do that accurately?

It claims to predict it six days ahead, but then if it changes retrospectively - as it sounds like it did with you - it isn't really predicting anything, more like just having a good guess which I think I can do without spending the ££!

I already know I ovulate because I do temp (as much as I can!). The ClearBlue one appeals to me as I think sometimes, because I don't always OV on the same day, I miss the window before the 'peak' days. It would allow me to get to grips with that a bit more and I think I'd still temp for the key period.

Lucky you ignored it and kept going that month!!

Hope all is well with you?

Ah I see Lady - well that is exactly why I went for it too. Because it said it could predict up to 6 days ahead. And I hated the whole temping in the morning thing - gah!

It certainly was easier to wear the sensor all the time to get the temps, so it was easy to use.

But like you I read all the guff and thought 'wow - it can predict - it must be magic!' I actually thought (and am maybe embarrassed to admit) that maybe it did more than just take temps (by magic perhaps)? I thought it must do more to be able to predict it in advance. I thought maybe it did more and they didn't explain all that in the literature because it would give away their secret sort of thing?

However, what I think happens is that it uses the data it builds up and then just tells you 6 days before you usually ovulate. Now, I had a 28-29 day cycle so the first cycle we used it it obviously predicted I would ovulate on day 14. But it never seemed to change it's estimate based on the data it was recording. However, we conceived on the 3rd month of using it so perhaps it didn't have long enough? (giving it the benefit of the doubt here).

Also, DH liked the money back guarantee thing, which said that if you'd had sex at least once or twice (can't remember which, twice I think) during the 'green' days and nowt had happened in 12 months you could have your money back. But then when it had worked out when I'd ovulated, it retrospectively moved my 'green' days to be around the actual time of ovulation rather than the predicted time. My ov's were not masses away from day 14, but still varied every month. So maybe a week after ovulation, when it 'confirmed' ovulation, it would move the green days (which did at least show if we'd hit the most fertile days) but I worried about then whether we had ticked the box for the money back guarantee. For the 3 months that we used it, luckily we did even on the revised fertile windows but I always worried that if we aimed for the predicted ov window and then it was off, we might have not hit the right days (either for the best chance or for the money back thing). It was sort of as if there is no use predicting the ov date if it could be 3 or 4 (or more) days before I actually ov because if I aim for then, then I'd miss my real fertile window.

And the other thing, when I had the 'moving ovulation' in the last cycle (which I wonder if it was actually ov and then an implantation dip?) and I emailed them about it, they said 'well, we recommend that you SWI every other day just to be sure' Well, Jesus, tell me something I don't know - I thought it was going to predict it for me so I could be more targeted (in no way was I fed up of having to SWI every other sodding day) but to then go and say well really you should just do it every other day - I was a bit

Sorry, that;s a bit rambly - hope you can make some sense of it.....

Hi lovelies,

Hope everyone is well. Just popping in to say hi on my phone. I too have been feeling very gloomy but am snapping out of it now, expecting AF tomorrow. Can't believe how much we are all slaves to our hormones but it is reassuring it's not just me.

Had my hospital appointment last week. Doctor basically said it's either unexplained infertility or a tube problem. Not bothering doing any other bloods tests as my day 21 was good (60). Bit surprised he didn't want to the FSH test but also a bit relieved as it scares me. I've got a pelvic ultrasound on Friday and then HSG within the next couple of months. After that I have another appointment for feb and he basically said it'll be straight to ivf if it's unexplained, and I get one nhs go. At first I was pleased to have a plan in place and the prospect of some treatment on the horizon, but then I had a massive (probably hormone induced) few days of gloom and despair and a general feeling that it was all really unfair. Nothing new there :)

Will catch up properly with everyone soon but just wanted to quickly say good luck to joycep and I an rooting for you.

Love to all xxx

Hello,

Not much to say really cd3, so not much going on, I had acupuncture today and we spoke about my short mutual phase, and starting to talk to fertility clinics, I think we'll get the move out if the way (next week woo) then I'll bring it up with dh, I think he is pretty anti as he wants us to do it naturally, but well errr it ain't happening yet is it!

Joy cep any news?

Kitty why do you have to wait till feb?

Does anyone know if there is anything online that shows success rates of clinics?

I've got a clear blue ov monitor, I only really use it a couple of days a month as after months of trying I can pretty much tell when I'm ov now...

Hello all,

I've got my hospital appointment tomorrow, expecting to be in a similar situation to you Kitty as my GP has seemed pretty positive about the blood & sa tests. I guess I'll find out! Have others had to wait for a few months for a hsg too?

It's cd 27 for me today and I think I'm 12dpo. Might just poas tomorrow morning just in case, though I'm not holding my breath!

Hope the hormones settle down a bit for everyone.

Hi everyone,

I'm on call tonight hence the v early/late reply!

I guess you are all right that 11 dpo is early, its just when i had regular-ish cycles my LP was always 10 days. This is the first normalish month for ages in that i ovulated but it was really late- cd25.

I cant remember who asked but we have a clearblue monitor. I love it! We conceived DD after 3 cycles of use nad it has been fab. When i ov (not often these days) the day can vary by ten days! This means without the monitor we would likely miss it. The added bonus is as well as detecting impending ov by detecting LH it also detects rising oestrogen levels which indicates HIGH fertility as its the rise in oestrogen that promotes fertile mucus. So in a 'normal' cycle you would maybe have 5 high days followed by a PEAK. All in all i think its great.If you have any questions just ask, i check the thread a few times a day! [sad emoticon!]

Hope everyone is well

kitty - sorry you've been feeling down too. It's horrid but it seems that most of us feel the same at that pre AF stage so at least that's some reassurance that it is hormonal.

pixie - I'm waiting for a HSG at the moment - they couldn't fit me in this month. I think it's the system they use to book appts that means you often end up waiting for a couple of months. Because you can only call on CD1 I guess it's inevitable that they can't always fit everyone in.

Thanks for all your comments and advice on the fertility monitors. I think I'll invest in the Clearblue one as my ovulation day changes every month so knowing when my oestrogen levels start to rise will be a huge bonus. Amazon here I come!

izzy - No doubt once I start using it I'll have plenty of questions. How many sticks did you have to use in the first couple of months? I was just wondering how many to buy as they come in packs of 20. I've got everything crossed for you too.

Hi ladygee,

I think its normal to use 20 for the first cycle. The monitor gets you to poas from day 6 so ten tests only takes you to day 16 so if it hasnt detected a PEAK it gets you to do 20.

I have long cycles so generally always use 20 :( however i recently discovered that after you get first PEAK the rest of the results are automatic ( a 2nd PEAK, one HIGH day then low) so there is no need to use sticks once you get your PEAK meaning you save sticks and therfore money! Useful to know!

I'm away to bed now after my marathon 16.5hr shift!

Ps just poas and stark white again :(

Izzy leave the sticks alone :)

I used lots of sticks the first month with the monitor, but I ov around day 11/12 so I only start weeing around day 9, and once I have the peak I stop so, much cheaper now :)

hi - sorry everyone is feeling very gloomy.
Hope you're feeling better wine and are having a relaxing week.
izzy - hang on in there. Crossing fingers for you as am I for you pixie. Hopefully you won't need that hsg.

no news my end. I am suppose to test on Friday but i think i will just take my last progesterone tonight so i can get on with my next cycle and not waste a poas. 100% know it hasnt worked this month. The boobs are the dead give away. It's all so frustrating as all you ladies know too well.

Joy cep you just don't know, so wait and see! Signs are just changes in hormones, and some months our bodies show them more tan others, and the signs for pregnancy are the same for our periods... So just wait :)

Joyce I have to say I'm inclined to agree with karbea - just give it a few more days and wait and see. I know you feel it's not worked, but a few days to be sure won't make any difference in the grand scheme of things.

Sorry if this is a thick question but what does the progesterone do? And what is the impact of having the last one tonight? Can /should you continue to take it until test day?

joyce I just wanted to say that the two times I've been pregnant, first time boobs were really painful, second time not at all. So they are not always a good indicator of pregnancy. I am really hopeful you will get pregnant soon so please don't lose hope - if it doesn't work this time I'm sure it will next time or the time after. I would just try to 'zone out' (I know it's easier said than done) and do whatever the doctors have told you - so focus on that rather than the possibility of being pregnant. This is what I'm trying to do - just doing as I'm told and making it the doctors' issue whether I get pregnant or not (well, trying to anyway).

I know I'm hardly ever on here as it is but I am going to take a break from it for a bit, I've been knocked sideways by latest AF appearance and feel like this is all getting too much for me - I just can't think about it any more - but I do hope you all get your BFPs really soon!

yes you're right, i will just wait and see! biscuits - progesterone extends the LP so to give a bean a better chance of implanting. Plus as my levels are on the low side, if i was to get pregnant then the levels would be supported. As soon as i stop taking them my period comes within 48 hours.
munki - thanks for your words. Also zoning out is just what i need to do, I'm sorry about your latest af and hope you manage to stop thinking about it .

Ah I see Joyce well I would say Do. Not. Give. Up.

As munki says, try to zone out and do what the doctors said. I know it's hard when you feel a certain way. I also had no boob symptoms first time I got pg and sore ones this time. The one thing this pg had taught me is that however well you think you know your body, it always has one or two more surprises up it's sleeve for you! You have to give it the best possible chance and be a Good Girl . If it hasn't worked this time then we'll start working on the next one.

I'm still keeping everything crossed for you.

And if it doesn't work, then we'll be here with and chocolate and cuddles.

munki sorry to see you're going but I do understand needing to take a break from ttc for a while. Be kind to yourself and I wish you luck. Hope you get an ironic BFP by 'not' trying

Hello ladies,

Just a quick update. I poas this morning but as expected I go a BFN, so trundled off to my appointment. I had more bloods taken (for thyroid function, rubella immunity & AMH - have to say I'm feeling a bit wobbly about the results that AMH might show, but positive mental attitude & all that). As soon as I get to cd1 I need to ring & book in for a hsg & than DP & I will be back for a follow up appoitment to look at all of the results.

The specialist nurse seemed to think that GPs couldn't book hcgs, hence why it hadn't been done before when my GP had tried (& I'd ended up with an ultrasound), though I'm quite pleased I'm going to have one, as I've sort of convinced myself that it'll help . She also confirmed that the results from the tests that DP & I have had so far have been normal.

I'm feeling pretty positive all in all, roll on cd1!

Pixie that sounds good.

DH and I had a long chat last night and he said that as soon as we move we are going to go to a fertility clinic. Quite excited, feeling far more positive

joycep I second biscuits! I know that you will be protecting yourself from disappointment but I truly believe that until af comes, it really is impossible to call. I'm no gynae ( good job or I'd be scanning myself all the time) but maybe carrying on with the progesterone is important, just in case a little egg is trying to nestle in? Id be tempted to follow the instructions, even if you do just wish the waiting were over? And we are all here for you, whatever happens. I send calming vibes.

pixie glad to hear that things are all moving forward for you and kitty and that all results look good. kitty how do you feel about ivf being bought up? No one has mentioned that to us yet, but maybe after the lap and dye they will. No ivf rounds on my pct tho. They did mention clomid but im confused about that because im ovulating fine and my progesterone is good. She said it helps egg quality, so maybe they think thats what my issue is..I'm not brave enough to have a repeat fsh test on day2, but I am praying that it comes back at 8ish and not 9ish, it will make me feel a lot better. Would hate it to get worse!! Maybe next month. I'm 11dpo and no spotting. I didn't have very much spotting last month but there was a bit. If there isn't any at all this month, I'll be suspicious as I swear I never had it before I started ttc.

munki sorry to see you go for a bit and that it's all getting too much, but i hope a break does you good. And if you ever need us...

izzy sending a hug

Karbea glad to hear youre happier

Having done a lot of research on my medication and ttc and talking with my gp, I'm not using contraception next month. A lot of women take losec while pregnant and my gp said it was ok, so long as I stopped if I was to get pregnant. It doesn't feel ideal but I don't want another month of not trying, even thought the break has had a lot of nice things about it. Im finally startng to feel better today so dont want to stop the meds either. But, I'm going to try very hard not to talk about ttc with my dh at all. I go on about it far too much and I think it will be a good test to just get on with life and give him a break from mucus and temperatures! I'm not going to opk either. I might guzzle some cough medicine though. Just for ttc kicks!

Whatever happened to pout?

biscuits - i can tell you 're a mummy already!! Sometimes I wish you girlies weren't just anonymous internet buddies as you're all so nice!! Anyway, I would fall off my perch if my boobies had been playing tricks like that with me. They're always spot on.

Pixie - sorry about the bfn but i'm pleased things are moving foward for you and that everything is normal so far and you are positive.

Karbea- that's great you'll be moving towards a fertility clinic. It's a good feeling to feel like you're going to be getting assistance.

wine - at scanning yourself. It made me think though that purchasing a scanning machine could be a profitable business - i shall take it to dragons den. It costs £200 per scan at a private clinic and all they do is switch on the machine and put the cam up there and measure the size of the follicle. We could do it ourselves, who needs a gynae and i would never charge £200. I see Theo Profeetus' eyes lighting up already.
Is losec for the stomach ulcer? is it any better? Good idea to just carry on ttc.

yes i hope pout is ok. I think she must have weened herself off MN. I do wonder sometimes whether it feeds my obsession a bit but i find it calming to write things down. I don't think I would go onto the pregnancy boards if i got a bfp so will ween myself off when that miracle happens.

I'm still resolutely crossing my fingers for you Joyce - I know you know your own body, so I'm ready with chocolate for you if you're proved right.

I still might arrive at your house tomorrow to make sure you're taking the progesterone!

Also, sorry if I was a bit bossy and mummy-ish earlier

I just wish we could all fast forward and just know when each person will get their BFP. I always thought I wouldn't mind the wait so much if I knew there was an end to it all and roughly when that would be. Still I suspect we've all had those thought :(

Bloody hell, DS has just wee'd all over the TV unit! Grrrr He knows he's not supposed to stand close to the TV (and especially not when he's bare bottom potty training!) Gah!

I wish I could just send him to nursery and tell them I'll haver him back when he's totally potty trained! I hate this bit :(