Emmsys weebling onwards and upwards into summer.

[VJay]

Here we are a new spruced up greenhouse

Wow you lot have talked! not that I should be knowing how we all are but that does mean I can't do a proper catch up as only got access to pc whilst at work so apologies. So those I remember

Vjay Massive hugs for today my lovely, hope it's not too stressful and emotional a day for all of you x
thief Love the new name and brilliant to see you posting lots
Barbie Can't get on FB but did spot you asking the flavour question- I have to say would be more tempted for a second dc - so do it do it do it Remember to have some chill out time whilst you're running around too
curly Sorry about BFN, but great to see you officially on the bench keeping 4ever company.
Sabs Thankfully E is not a huge fan of In the Night Garden as I detest it, also not rocking the new Baby Jake? What's all that about?? E loves it though sits and laughs his socks off at it.
Neeko Your dd is adorable, bet you had such a lump in your throat seeing her off. Just waiting for ensuite photo now
Moon I remember feeling just like this when my SIL had her first baby, I was so pleased for her but felt so sh*t and then felt guilty for feeling awful it's such a roller coaster of emotions and you feel as if no-one "gets" how it feels, so please keep sharing if you can with us , as we "get" you my lovely
Blue How was it this morning?
4ever Glad you had a fab day out Stop trying to "out" me on the small panters bench naughty! I will confess to doing a pg test last month when late and being disappointed, possibly maybe look at ttc with earnest next year by which time you will be on the medium pants bench

Well I rang the hospital yesterday with our decision and we are officially on the waiting list for the operation felt slightly sick after but know that we are doing the right thing. So wish I could afford to go private so that I wouldn't have all this waiting and hand wringing
E has now started telling us "ov ooo" (love you) and asking for cuggles and giving kisses randomly without being asked - it's so adorable and makes up for all those sleepless nights and tantrums

Another quickie post to let vjay know I'm thinking of her and ajay today. Hope it all goes as well as can be.

Blue How was this morning? Did you take any photos?

buddha Good news about about E being officially on the waiting list. Hope you don't have to wait too long

curly Have sent you the website for ITNG.

Be back soon

....and breathe....
He didn't have it done in the end, we are soooo relieved, the peanut butter is now in the bin. When we got there they'd decided that as he was still so young and the initial reaction he had was so big they they would just go ahead and give us the protocol without testing. The protocol is a set of 'rules' that we have and can pass onto to nursery/school for when he has a reaction. They are going to repeat the skin prick tests before he starts school then do the challenge when he is around 7. We just have to avoid all nut products.
While we were there we had epipen training, which was good to do. We also asked about CJay, because, up until recently, he was a very fussy eater and has never had nuts, so they are bringing him in for a skin prick test. i'm not too worried about that as I'm sure he would have come into contact with nuts at some point so far.

Anyway thankyou for all your lovely messages

buddha well done, {{{hug}}}, and E is just too cute

1st chance to get on her today, was trying to get on early to say I was thinking of all our brave mums today, vjay, blue and Buddha. Looks like you have alll come out the other side ok so breathe easy now, feet up and relax.

I'm rushing as normal back tomorrow...loads of love xx

Just a quickie to say good newsVjay relieved you didn't have to open the PB, hving rules and protocols makes us feel in control and in charge which can only be a good thing xx

Buddha - so glad you've made your decision too, its for the best but you know that. Your E is a wee charmer, watch him

First day over, all went well, emotional wreck last night but proud as punch Mumy today, he skipped into class without a backward gance, how it should be . Thanks for all your good wishes x

Back tomorrow for catch up as I have three, yes THREE whole hours to myself whilst Isaac's at school as Benjy at Grannies..

Evening all - I'm away for a week & I totally loose the thread of the errrr.... thread.

Vjay so glad it went well with AJay & you can breathe again.

GG omg can't believe you have another little bun in your oven - massive congrats. Dd1 went in her bed at the age of about 2 and a little bit.

Strawberry have just sent Neeko a text as I was totally confused by your identity, now I know who you are!

Blue loving the photo's on fb - it's not one of those schools that makes them go in wearing shorts in the winter is it??

Moon I know how tough it must have been to see your sisters' baby. Next month, next month you will begin to get answers & treatment & then fingers, toes & eyeballs crossed - what you've been waiting for & so so deserve.

Sabs dd1 used to love night garden. I'm sure dd2 would love it too but she has to watch whatever her big sister is watching which is usually Peppa Pig or Ben & Holly!

Not much to report from me. DD2 was supposed to be having her MRI on Thurs but her swelling has gone down so much on its own that the consultant says he'll see her & decide if it still needs to be done or if we wait until it comes up again.

Really glad you didn't have to go through the trauma of the tests vjay...

Buddha yay to making your apt and going for the op, will be worth it in the end..

Blue so pleased young Isaac loved his first day at school bless his cotton socks!

Mls glad Kitty seems to be improving..

Sorry didn't get on yesterday to post that, should of been my mum and dads 37th anniversary so had Dmum round for the day...

Vjay Thank goodness you didn't have to go through the scary nut experience!
Blue Managed a 5 minute peak on FB last night at Mum's house as pc still at the "doctors" and saw the adorable pictures of I, it's typical that all these milestones leave us an emotional wreck but the dc's are skipping and jumping in glee! Much easier on you than if he was holding on to your leg screeching!
Oops just seen time, got to go will try to get back later x

Hello girls, I have come down with a bad cold...sore throat and temp. Meh.

Dolly is teething, her last few and has been a grump too. We are both here feeling sorry for ourselves.

Still no news.

Had a few barbie moments and dolly is following in my footsteps first one was while making Jamie olivers toad in the hole. Read about placing a tray under hot fat to catch drips..sod that I thought, I will just use deeper dish. Beaming on my own genius I did just that and we went to bath dolly. Next thing we know house filled with smoke and oven on fire thank god dh has more sense than me and is trained in fire fighting!

Dolly is a hoot, she will copy any word you say to her, so yesterday on Skype to my mum so put her head in her hands and sighed. My mum asked her what is wrong and the little madam looked up, brushed her hair out of her eyes in dramatic fashion and said 'bored'

We also went to visit a friend who just had new baby, on holding the baby dolly can bounding over and removed the baby hand from mine, looked sternly at the new baby and said 'it's my mummy'

Buddha has is potty training going? Dolly tells us now as she is doing a poo, by grabbing her bits and saying uh oh, poo! She also says the same for wee however give her the potty and she gets in it, legs and all or will drag dolly around in it. The one time she took her nappy off she came running out of play room and said the magic words, she was covered in shit all over, I picked her up I got covered too (boak) so put her in the sink.......just as the water pressure dropped and nothing came out. I was cursing I can tell you. For hours after I couldn't get rid of poo smell. Until I realised it was in. My hair. Nappies are back on for now!

4ever hope you are ok, yesterday must of been hard. Have a hug from me xxx

Sorry for typos I pad changes all the words!

Barbie it's so cute when your lo gets all territorial over Mummy. DD1 keeps saying "my Mummy" to dd2 & I have to keep reminding her that I'm both of their Mummy's!

It's been very quiet on here for the last few days. I took dd2 to the consultant yesterday & he's now concerned that the lump isn't what he thought it was as although it's shrunk, it's now small & hard. He thinks it may be something called a branchial cleft cyst & if it is then she's going to need surgery to remove it. She's going to have an ultrasound next week.

Oh & now dd1 has a bloody lump on her wrist!! I've done some googling & I think its a ganglion cyst, if it's still there next week I'm going to take her to the docs.

Moon any appointments booked? Next week is Sept, yay!

Off to tidy up now as my parents are coming down for the weekend.

Having a crappy one, think Af maybe due back soon so 3months of pmt and hormones flying around.. Have had 3 different people ask how the pregnancy is going this wk, so have had to hold it together while i tell them and then have all the pitying looks and quiet awkwardness that follows.. On the other hand i feel its now a closed subject with everyone else that does know, problem of putting on the brave front I spose, makes me feel like it never existed.. Think I'm also feeling crap cos September is round the corner, and all the sad dates, my 4th edd on the 8th, my 2nd edd on the 23rd, and will unbelievably be 4yrs on the 14th since my 1st miscarriage.. I think in RL people don't think its healthy to remember these dates but I saw all my babies heartbeats, they lived inside me, for however short a time, and i want to remember they existed.. It should also be my Ddads 60th birthday on the 11th so its so sad that he isn't celebrating it with his only grandchild, though i do like to try and think of my 5 lost angels up there running him ragged!

Sorry for me post, just needed to get it out my system, obviously these dates looming is worse cos of what I've just gone through, its all raw again.. Last sept was nowhere near as bad, as Summer was newborn and the heartache was totally cushioned by our little blessings arrival the yr before Id felt so destitute as my edd approached, and we actually conceived Summer on my dads birthday! That does help even things out, and of course there's our holiday to be looking forward too as well... Onwards and upwards eh? Had my wallow, now kicking myself up the arse and dusting myself down, as you were ladies....

4ever That is one multitude of emotional gut wrenching dates in such a short space of time so you are most definately allowed a wallow like you said it's all being made worse by your last lost angel so recently and AF from hell being due. We know it's not a closed chapter no matter how brave a face you put on, and of course you will remember the dates they are etched on your heart and are still your dc's my lovely so feel free to unload as often as needed
I prescribe a vat of chocolate, a barrel of wine and some hair strokes x

Thank you so much Buddha definitely hormonal as your lovely post has just made me cry... The tears are streaming down my cheeks, i think i needed someone to validate that its ok to feel shit and acknowledge the fact my heart is allowed to ache and the bit about them always being my DC just done me.. Thank you for my hug, hope you can still breath cos i squeezed you back very very tight.. I'm off to eat my vat of chocolate now...

just a quicky cos there be thunder 4ever a vat of chocolate sounds just up our street. buddha gold star for you this week for being lovely!

Not long stopped crying, healthy i spose cos tbh only actually cried about 5 times... made my vat of chocolate a bit salty tho! Strawberry take one of your shiny gold stars for ya self cos your always very lovely too y know... X x x x x x

thunder has gone. do you all remember your nans running around taking all the plugs out when it started thundering

15 mile tail backs coming into Cornwall

4ever it is probably a good thing to have a good howl. it always the really shitty thing with mc that it is usually about now that you need the shoulders to lean on and of course everyone is back to 'normal' in rl. that horrible hormone crash is foul and i think we had better prescribe that you stay partly submerged in the vat and watch out that vjay doesn't try putting a straw in it!

come on 5pm friday come onnnnnnnnnnnnnn

submerged in vat makes me think of dhs office where i should have been submerged in his vat quarter vat of chocolate much nicer thought.

and more rain.

Chocolate???? Where???? Pulls 4ever out of the chocolate and starts eating what is left, not much! I am so sorry this coming month is shitsville for you, as always my lovely weeble we are all here to hold you upright as you may wobble. I wish I could make it all better for you, but I'm only too aware of my situation and what yours should be. I don't know what to say really, so instead I will give you another hug and share your chocolate.

Rain? I miss the rain, although not enough to want to come back and face a winter in the uk!

Vat of more like sssllluuurrrpppp

4ever hair strokes and wine sharing coming your way

Just had a thunder storm up here too, the dog kept whimpering while ajay slept

I love you ladies so much.... thank u for being there, for understanding, and for providing chocolate and wine! Feel much better for offloading but still a bit grouchy so think AF def imminent... oh joy

Barbie i know you know and just that makes a world of difference, you're a sweetheart...

Vjay pass that straw over here my darlin

Been chucking it down here too but had to go and buy a friends DD 2nd birthday pres for party tomorrow, quite looking forward to it, my girls a bit of a social butterfly, whilst out i got drawn into Next and couldn't help a bit of retail therapy, always helpful

Oh 4ever you poor poor love, it must be so hard at the moment. I'm glad that these slightly nuts but very lovely ladies managed to cheer you up a bit today hang in there lovely xxx

Big waves to everyone. I'll be back tomorrow to catch up. I'm a bit poorly so going to get my head down tonight. Pass over some wine and a straw though - purely medicinal dontya know

Very quiet in here?

We are just back from hospital, my heart is playing up and I have been having at least 3 or 4 palpitations a day for the past few weeks, by far worse than last time. I have to go back and see the heart specialist in a week or so. James asked to find out the sex today the place where we had the 12 week scan offered to tell us but we declined, however I know dh really wanted to know so told him he could find out. Who wants to know? Any guesses?

Barbie moment big time yesterday, drove off the petrol forecourt with the petrol thingy still attached! Whoops....lots of beeping and men running towards us flapping their arms, dh was so embarrassed

Hope you are all ok, speak soon xx

Nobody wants to know? Ok sod you all then... I'll be over on the baby name board if anyone wants me.

I do I do I do, I lurked on phone last night as PC still poorly and can't post on it so I've come to Mum's specially just to find out so please pretty please tell me????? Its a boy isn't it????????????
Please??