Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake, wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting, weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 16)

[olismum23]

Hello! If you have recently miscarried and are thinking of or actively trying again come and join us! We offer plenty of cake, tea and wine if needed! Come in and laugh, cry and rant as needed, and don't be afraid of asking whatever questions you need answers to and we'll try our best to answer them.

Add yourself to the stats list whenever you are ready.

wttc = waiting to try to conceive
ucl = usual cycle length
wtf cycle = the time after your mc when you have no idea whats going on with your normal cycle

Lets hope this is a lucky thread and we all get our bfps!

stats to follow

Part 15 here

Afternoon all!

pie I thought the opk rationing idea was genius and may be tempted to give it a whirl when we can get back to TTC!

ciwi and sunshine so to hear about your experiences of MC.

dizzy glad you got a BFN - sounds strange to be saying that but am sure I'll be looking out for one in the next couple of weeks too! ses hope yours comes soon too!

Well, I had to go back to the hospital this afternoon as they wrote the wrong date of birth on my bloods yesterday so the lab wouldn't take them! So I'm now doing a good impression of a bruised pin-cushion!! On the plus side my docs were really good and have sorted out a sick note covering the whole period from the first scan through to Monday next week and my boss rang and said just to call him on Monday and see how I'm doing which is a relief as it takes the pressure off a bit.

shell if you're interested in 'taking charge' of your cycle and find the internet daunting, might you give fertilityfriend a try? It's online, yes, but has simple online tutorials that walk you through the steps of charting. I found it to be so empowering/enlightening when I started!

- join here

I've heard good things about TCOYF so I hope you get on with the book (although I've not read it myself)

Well, I've had a wobbly day; I know it's still 'early days' for me, too, but sometimes, it just seems to come from nowhere. I was laying with DS2 to put him down for his nap and as I looked at his sleeping face I was overwhelmed by my love for him. That wonderful happy feeling then jumped to an intense feeling of NOT wanting to ttc because I want my little boy that has gone, not a different baby. I kinda let the feeling sweep over me as even as I felt it, a small rational voice was telling me that I DO want another child, for all the same reasons that I wanted one when we tried to get pregnant with DS3 but it was still quite horrible.

Then I read a thread about overdue women being fed up (as they rightly do get!) and all I could think was 'be grateful you're term and hope labour goes well'. I don't even mean it, if you know what I mean? I just get these thoughts which I guess are similar to the ones you guys are getting when people voice gripes over minor things. Ugh.

Anyway, feeling a bit better this evening, I think.

Thanks ciwi, that's how I feel so that is good advice to split the month up and do diff exercises each half, thanks : - )

MandaHugNKiss - thanks for that, if the book is too heavy going (its like a textbook!) I will check that website out. And I know how you feel abt it hitting you all of a sudden, and having thoughts that are really not part of your normal personality at all...feeling very uncharitable at the moment!

Hi Peeps,

Hope everybody is well! I have been bleeding heavily and passing very small clots today so am really really hoping, 4 weeks after I started miscarrying, that this is it. The hospital called last night and said my HCG level was 32 so i'm nearly there!. I will be so glad when it's over though as the constant spotting/bleeding for a month has been a daily reminder of the loss :(

We are away on hols (SW Scotland) on Saturday so it will be a nice break. We are going with friends who also had a miscarriage very recently, so will be having lots of wine and tears no doubt. Sadly the colleague that I had bumped into in the EPU yesterday had also had a miscarriage (I work with the hubby) so it's really coming to the fore how common an occurence this is. Hopefully none of us here, or my friends in RL, will have to go through it again!

shellshock - I would also really recommend TCOFYF and the fertility friend website. I had no idea about the temperature thing and find it really interesting.

blue - glad to hear your boss isn't giving you any hassle about taking a week off. I do wonder if i'd taken time off if I would have recovered quicker rather than not taking any time off at all (I really, really didn't want work to know).

manda - I know exactly what you mean about overdue women. A friend of mine was constantly moaning about how fed up and fat she was and she just wanted the f thing to come out. I said 'i'm sure your baby can hear and sense everything that's going on so just calm down and remember how lucky you are'. I was most annoyed!!

Hope everybody else is well, for some reason I can only see one page on my PC so sorry for the missing name checks! Off to cook tea to enjoy with the Apprentice! I've taken tomorrow off work to get a totally new hair-do, going short and the thought has cheered me up a bit :)

Any word from googie ?

x

Hi Ladies,

Feel it's about time to jump on here now. Sorry for everyone's MC experiences and losses. Wish we didn't have to be on here, but I take great comfort in being able to openly share stuff with people who actually know what it's like. Well-meaning friends (with no experience of MC) in RL just don't get it.

Had ERPC on 16th May after MMC. it was obviously devastating, and still hurts, but I feel ready to move on from the miscarriage threads (sort of feel staying on there is holding me back a bit). This seems to be the positive, forward-thinking place to be!

Recognise several names from previous threads (wave to Bluecrane Shell* Bats Hotcross whatsoever). Haven't managed to read right through from beginning yet (I start work at 8.30am ooops!), but Hi to everyone else and best of best of luck to everyone on this crazy journey!

Morning all and welcome missgiraffe

pie really hope you've nearly finished, sounds like a really rough 4 weeks hope the holiday provides a good break and time to relax and start to recover. Enjoy the hairdressers too!!

manda how are you feeling today?

Well, I'm off to the hospital in an hour for my ERPC, bag packed and trying not to think about it if I'm honest. Will be pleased to have got this bit over with though so we can start thinking about moving forward, I just feel as though we've 'wasted' the last 2-3 months with all of this, very frustrating!

blue hope things go ok for you today and it is all over with as quickly as possible xxx

THinking of you blue. I found the time in the hospital... strange. It was very much an 'in a bubble' type feeling - it was nice to be in competent, caring hands which somehow helped.

Haven't caught up yet but hope everything goes well today and you're ok Blue, thinking of you.

Has anyone had preconception counseling? if so what is it? My GP's nurse phoned me today to book an appointment for it. When i asked what it was, admitted i didn't understand, she simple said in a you're a thicko voice it's preconception counseling. Figured it's free so why not! The appointment is with my GP. Is it talking about health and poss tests they can do on me or something else?

Off to read through everything i've missed!

Blue hope all went well the with ERPC yesterday.

Pie hope you are nearly done....

I've not been on for a bit so lots of catching up to do for me. It's 17 days since my ERPC now. This time last week, DH and I were talking about starting TTC again at the 14 day mark if everything seemed OK, as the bleeding and discomfort had stopped. Unfortunately, the bleeding started again at the weekend and has carried on so that has put paid to that. No pain and it is light but wondering at what point I should bother going to the doctors? I don't have any symptoms of infection and the histology results from the ERPC were normal so I'm not sure what else they could check for.

Hopefully it will stop soon, and DH and I will actually be TTC not just thinking about it! In more positive news, we had a nice few days in the Lakes - even if no bonking was involved

Morning all, well all went well yesterday despite the 3 hour wait and them having to insert a tablet (sorry TMI) to soften my cervix before I went in which wasn't the most pleasant! All the nursing staff were lovely and gave me some nice strong painkillers, a cup of tea and a scone with jam when I came round!! DH has been a star looking after me and the pain and bleeding seem to be lessening this morning, will see what the next few days bring. The sister gave me a sick note signing me off next week which takes the pressure off but will see how I feel Monday/Tuesday.

whatsoever sorry to hear you've started bleeding again - what a pain! I take it there's no chance it could be your first period and it's just come early? Have you done a test to see if you're getting a bfn yet?

bats I know my BIL and wife did preconception genetic counselling so I don't know if that's what they're suggestion?

DH's parents are coming to visit tomorrow and bringing lots of yummy meals to keep us going for the next few days

watsoever i think you can have all sorts of weird bleeding after a mc. I had medical management then about 4 and a half weeks later had a light af (still heavy enough for me to think it was a real one) then 2 weeks after that i had a heavy af and i think i ov'd 2 weeks after that. just waiting for the witch to show now and i would have had my 1st proper cycle. think we are going to start ttc after that. you may not ov till you have had a proper af afterwards i dont think i did x
blue glad it all went ok for you, its never going to be a good experience but at least its over with now. you should relax and be pampered all weekend xxx
well i got my bloods today and my thyroid levels are nearly normal again, i persuaded them to up my dose though because i want them completely normal so they have and i reckon in 2 weeks the levels will be good enough to ttc again!

Ah, the cervix-softening pessary, I had forgotten that joy. Reminded me of an "expereince" in a tent age 15 with a boy who didn't know what he was doing and just decided to rummage around....not pleasant, but no lasting harm done

Blue glad you are being looked after by DH.

Definitely not my period yet - too light and it's still old blood I think.

Glad everything went well blue and that you're being cared for.

I didn't have a cervix softening pessary - unless that's why they inserted the first three cytotec internally? But they were tablets and not a pessary (the following 2x2 at three hourly intervals were oral).

whatsoever I had 2 days of spotting followed by 18 day light... then 10 days later what appeared to be a light AF (and the timing was right for when they said it would turn up). But the fact there was only ten days between my bleeding stopping and the 'af' means there wasnt enough time for it to be a true hormonal cycle. 33 days later my 'true' af turned up, shockingly heavy and painful... and has just waned away to spotting today. I am pretty sure I did not O for either of those cycles (I get several signs and they were all mia) so finers crossed that this will be my 'getting back to normal' cycle where I do O as we are officially ttc from now.

Where did you stay in the Lakes? I've spent lots of time there as had several members of my maternal family living there.

Good news the bloods are headed in the right direction ciwi. Do you really think your dose needs upping or does your body just need a little more time to adjust? My uncles wife had trouble with her thyroid (overactive) and I now they tweaked her meds for some time before she went ahead ttc.

manda they used tablets rather than a pessary for me too...said it was needed because it was my first pregnancy and I hadn't started to bleed at all yet and they were worried about causing cervical trauma if they just went in without trying to get it to open itself a bit first! Oh the joys of being female eh!

the posts about how/when you have bled have made me think that I need to start a little diary to keep a track of the next few weeks otherwise I'm not going to have a clue where I'm at!

Just booked flights to Cork, Ireland for our long weekend in July and now trying to sort out a B+B - keeping me busy for the mo though which is good! Staying pretty close to the sofa today

ciwi and manda glad you're pretty much back to TTC!

whatsoever from what the others have said it sounds as though your body's still sorting itself out...what a pain!

HI there, may I gate crash?

I just found this thread today after lurking on the miscarriage thread and I'm so sorry about all your losses.

I found out about my missed miscarriage about 2.5 weeks ago and miscarried 2 weeks ago today. There seems to be a wealth of knowledge on here so I hope you don't mind if I pick your collective brains....

My miscarriage all happened very fast after it started. I started bleeding heavily on Thursday 26th May and had passed all but a 2 cm piece of tissue by 9am Friday morning. The tissue passed a couple of days later - was weird actually seeing something...

I'm still bleeding fairly heavily - bright red, clotty blood - this is normal, isn't it? Are blinding headaches, mood swings also normal. I'm being an absolutely horrible parent to my 2 year old at a time when I feel that I should be appreciating her not being impatient and annoyed!

Why does everyone talk about taking a pregnancy test when the bleeding stops (the hospital just discharged me without any advice/follow up)?

I'm finding the whole thing quite hard to handle. I'm not good at showing my emotions and I think I seem quite hard or over it or something. Instead of crying, the emotion comes out as anger or silence. MY DH has been good to a point, but I think the whole physical aspect (I lost a lot of blood and went into shock) seems to have passed him by. He just expects me to be better and I feel so tired and physically drained all the time.

Gosh sorry, going off on one now ... Just wanted to say hi and I'm sorry that so many people are going through this - it's shit....

Hi ladies, think I would like to jump on to this thread, although sorry I have to

This sucks. Started mc on 28th May, they reckon 6 or 7 weeks (unsure about ov date) but when I got to the EPU the test was negative so I didn't need to have any other procedures etc. I thought before this happened that if it was early on I wouldn't feel so bad but I was so wrong.

It was the last day of our holiday in Greece, 1st proper one with DS who is 15 months. We had a lovely time then on the evening before we started our 2-day adventure back to the UK I started bleeding and by the next day it was clear what was happening. I felt like my world had ended.

Anyway, I have dusted myself off and here I am again, feeling more nervous this time though. CD14 today, no sign of ov yet (I am using Fertility Friend as I have crazy long PCOS cycles) but starting to feel positive again.

I haven't had chance to read all of the pages yet, but I am very sad to see some names I recognise from TTC buses such as BlueCrane - so sorry for your loss, and everyone else here

I'll add myself to the stats in a sec, my copy and paste hasn't worked...

ok, stats list below - couldn't find one more recent than last thurs so please feel free to correct any mistakes/omissions...

TTC

Tokyotwist ttc #2 cycle 1 cd 71 ucl unknown
MissTinaTeaspoon ttc #2 cycle 4 cd 25 ucl 28
Stitchinline ttc#1 cycle 4 cd 15 ucl 33ish
Loup23 ttc#1 cycle 5 cd 16 ucl 33
Thefalconsmistress ttc#2 cd 7 ucl 35ish
Poppyjen ttc#2 cycle 1 post mc ucl ? (loooong and unpredictable)

WTTC

CuttlefishDramas

Recent BFPs

Lily06 ttc#1 BFP 13/05/11
Piglet ttc#1 6+5 weeks
laylasmummy09 ttc#2 6+2

Hi all, just a quickie because i need to pack for my hols!
manda they recommend low normal levels for ttc and mine were just on normal hence the increased dose. the doc was fine with increasing it one he knew we wanted to ttc and i was only on a childs dose anyway. am now on the lowest adult dose so still not much xxx
whingy you do a pg test as it confirms that the mc is complete and there is nothing left iykwim. The hospital should do it and it was on the leaflet i got but no one arranged for me to have one so i just checked myself xxx

Morning all

ciwi hope you have a great holiday!

poppyjen so to see you here too but glad you're starting to feel more positive with TTC.

whingey I feel so out of control with my emotions since erpc on thursday - it's horrible! Was awful to DH yesterday, up one moment and so down the next and his parents are coming today and I just know i'm going to be a nightmare so not really looking forward to it! I just keep snapping at everything and can't seem to help it...reminds me of the awful pill they put me on just before I got married which turned me into a dragon and I had to swap onto a different one...here's hoping my hormones sort themselves out quickly

Blue - sorry for those pesky hormones. Hope your visitors behave well and they help take the workload for a bit. Are they aware of what you are going through?

poppyjen - hello! Sorry you find yourself here but fingers crossed for sticky beans all round v soon.

ciwi - enjoy your hols! I've got an underactive thyroid too and am feeling much better on my new dose of 200mcg. Hopefully we're both settled on the right dose now and it does the trick!

whingey - I also have a 2yo and found it tough to begin with but this week has been much better. My DH doesn't really get what it's been like for me either. He doesn't think it's possible to lose so much blood and doesn't appreciate the hormonal ups and downs. I suppose I don't really understand exactly what it's like for him though. He's lost a baby too but out of the few friends that know, no one really checks how he is.

MissGiraffe - welcome to the thread. I'm pleased you're starting to feel ready to move forwards.

8 days since ERPC and bleeding has reduced to spotting but I still got a BFP this morning. How long does it usually take to get a BFN?

Thanks hotcross DH's parents here and know the situation and have brought SO much food - I could barely fit it all in the freezer...but not a bad thing as means I don't need to cook much in the next week or so! I seem to be feeling a little bit better than I was first thing this morning but just very tired...but not bleeding anymore which seems a bit quick in comparison to everyone else going to wait until Thursday (a weeks after erpc) to check for bfp/bfn.

One thing that is bothering me is that I think they may have damaged a nerve in my hand when they put the line in to give me the general anesthetic as it was very very painful when they put it in and afterwards and excruciating when they took it out and now I have weird feelings running up into my fingers if I touch (even lightly) where the line went in...going to monitor but may need to go to the docs on Monday...in fact just noticed weird feeling in my hand as I type too...grrrr...

Hello all! Do you mind if I also join you? Have been lured over here by MissGiraffe from the miscarriage threads.

I had a mmc on the 11th of May and an ERPC on the 13th. My AF arrived yesterday (so exactly 28 days post erpc) but I had some spotting a week before AF which, according to Dr Google, can apparently mean I'm still in "progesterone withdrawal" (any ideas what the implications of this are???).

I'm dying to get going on the TTC but the days seem to be dragging by, it's driving me mental!

Poppyjen - I can relate to your story, my dd is 18mo and I really wanted to have another one soon so that they're close in age.

Anyway, I will add my stats...

Lovely to meet you all waves

TTC

Tokyotwist ttc #2 cycle 1 cd 71 ucl unknown
MissTinaTeaspoon ttc #2 cycle 4 cd 25 ucl 28
Stitchinline ttc#1 cycle 4 cd 15 ucl 33ish
Loup23 ttc#1 cycle 5 cd 16 ucl 33
Thefalconsmistress ttc#2 cd 7 ucl 35ish
Poppyjen ttc#2 cycle 1 post mc ucl ? (loooong and unpredictable)
Marathonmama ttc 2 cycle 2 post mmc cd 2 ucl 29-30

WTTC

CuttlefishDramas

Recent BFPs

Lily06 ttc#1 BFP 13/05/11
Piglet ttc#1 6+5 weeks
laylasmummy09 ttc#2 6+2

Anyone know where I can find a hash key on my apple notebook???