Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake, wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting, weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 15)

[meliesmummy]

Hello! If you have recently miscarried and are thinking of or actively trying again come and join us! We offer plenty of cake, tea and wine if needed! Come in and laugh, cry and rant as needed, and don't be afraid of asking whatever questions you need answers to and we'll try our best to answer them.

Add yourself to the stats list whenever you are ready.

wtcc = waiting to try to conceive
ucl = usual cycle length
wtf cycle = the time after your mc when you have no idea whats going on with your normal cycle

Lets hope this is a lucky thread and we all get our bfps!

part 14 of the thread

stats to follow

Ah cep thanks hon. Men eh? Sorry your DH is on that bandwagon too but I guess its good to know we are not alone! My DH was so excited when I was pregnant but I think he doesn't cope very well with being in debt and he just freaks out when we have a big visa bill....I hope that's just what it is anyway and he would be excited if I got pregnant again (that is if I can convince him to DTD with me!)

It just feels a bit rubbish when our best mates are trying to get pregnant and the husband could not be more excited. He cannot wait for his wife to get pregnant whereas mine...well if it doesn't work for the first month I think he will be pleased whereas I will be gutted. I just never imagined this is what it would be like and thought when you try for a baby you'll both be really excited.

I'm also mindful that we were really lucky to get pregnant first go first time around and then there was the MC...it could take longer next time or go wrong again (you can see I have a very positive mental attitude today!!) and I just want to get cracking asap.

I didn't even look at the painting...its going back and when I manage to speak to him again that is what I will be telling him!

bump i hope he gets back into it, cause it does hurt when you read all the stories about ptnrs feeling kicks and all that when dh wasn't bothered. I have the same mental attitude, if this one fails i have a limited amount of time left.

Morning ladies - congratulations blackat and mumtum brilliant news, hope it's catching for all!

Sorry to hear about your P bump, I know what it's like, since I had the mc all I can think about is being pregnant again and we too were going to tell parents in a couple of weeks (and stupidly my diary still has weeks every Thursday so I see that I would be 9 weeks today - lesson learnt for any future pregnancy...!). Will a month really make a huge difference in terms of finance? I second what the other girls say that if you sit down and explain to him how you're feeling maybe he'll understand. My DH also ranted about finances but I think children are expensive whenever you have them and one month won't make a difference....! I hope you manage to speak to him and I hope you get to DTD this cycle!

I'm hoping I O this month without having had an AF since the mc - have nay of you with a BFP now got pregnant after mc without waiting for AF? x

Thanks Really I did try telling him the other day how upsetting it was that he was so negative when our friend's husband is so excited and he says it is just because of money. I guess I haven't really said emotionally it would cost me a lot more to wait so I will try explaining it that way - I just feel like he should know that and I shouldn't have to force his hand to have a baby with me now.

Cep we are all super excited for you on here so I know it won't be the same but hopefully it will make up for it a little and I am sure he will come around when the baby arrives.

Loup was thinking of you yest and wondered how you are doing. I so know what you mean about learning for next time! I didn't write it down but it is all in my head though. I think once I get past what would have been 12 weeks it will be easier as I sort of never thought past that. Even stupid things like I have a massage booked this week as a present from my Mum and at the time I thought "oh I'll need to change it to a pregnancy massage" and now I don't need to Still I can eat soft cheese and sushi and drink wine...every cloud!

x

Hi all, back from Reflexologist. It was really relaxing, he said that my Fallopian tubes and ovaries felt bumpy (?!) but he's massaged the bumps out. I guess time will tell! And guess what? I've stopped bleeding. WTF?????? Nothing since I first got up. Although I still feel a bit crampy so im hoping things will start again soon because I am completely and unbelievably sick of this! Am I day 2 or 9???? It was definately proper blood last night though, and I felt really crampy! I think I might actually scream if it's stopped properly!!!!

That sounds tough bump, I agree, send the painting back and have a good chat tonight about how you are feeling.

Good luck for Monday collie, will you be 6 weeks by then? I hope that your weekend isn't too stressful.

Did you use opks this month loupe?

bump you'll have to all pretend you can feel it as well. oooh wine, have a glass for me. once my 12 weeks are up i'll be having a glass. i have had the very odd 1, (think i've had 2 small glasses since bfp) they say you can have 1-2 units a week, but to avoid in first trimester and i have actually been trying to stick to it.

mel glad the reflexologist went well. good grief what on earth is happening with your bleeding? are you still having no blood at all?

bumpwanted you poor love, im sorry that you are feeling so wrethched today, sounds to me as cep says maybe a chat with him later today to suggest taking the picture back so you dont have to delay TTC another month, perhaps he has other reservations like not wanting a december baby but he maybe to worried to say that to you ? Have you thought of an alternative something nice to do on mothers day to stop you mentalling over what was meant to happen still be able to enjoy mothers day ?

cep it had slipped my mind you were on a time limit too, odd in a way isnt it that i only had this month to or i had to wait a whole year til after the wedding to start again ,almost makes you think there must have been an accute desire to don suspenders and ravish OH every night for a week twice a day extra push for determination from somewhere fx these beans stick ....

collie glad the new gp went well always think thats a big help straight away, as for your cousin and wife pi think all of us on here know better than anyone that its really a bitter sweet peice of news when you are not the one announcing your bfp im sure they will be pleased for you but that you are from all the advice you give on here you come across as a strong and compassionate enough person that when you do break the news you will do so with appropriate grace and humility x

really im defo freaking out, didnt want to stretch in bed this morning in case i pulled ny insides around too much. really must stop worrying / mentalling stressing out over ridiculous things !!! Have had to come home from work though as after vomitting twice in the loos it got noticed ive claimed a tummy bug .... cant keep doing that though, i guess my hcg must be shooting up to be feeling so nauseous already not that im knocking having symptoms of course they are in an odd way reassuring ...

mumtum it was ironic for me as the one that got there (i think) was the quickie in the morning that i thought was too late. you'll soon get fed up with ms.

oops sorry was trying to catch up and posted before i realised i still had this page to catch up on !

mels glad the reflexology was a positive experience for you bumpy ovaries? not sure but wtf with your bleeding, im sorry im of no help i can only say i have my fx that it sorts itself out for you soon x x x

loup thank you ! we did say we would wait for 1 af before ttc again, then i thought i had one 9 weeks after mc ( 5 days but only very slow brown tmi sorry) but i was so eager i took this to be my af (had used opk which suggested i had ov 5 days prior to the 5 day brown bleed) 4 weeks later i did then get a proper af..... so i guess the short answer is yes i did wait for 1 af ended up i think really taking 2 cycles after mc to get my bfp...

cep funny how is works isnt it ? with DD i suffered so bad with morning sickness i ended up in hospital for most of my preg on a drip. With the 2nd preg i moaned so much about it and then it all dissapeared and i was so naive pleased then of course i mc (lesson learnt) this time ive promised myself deicded i will embrace my ms as a positive sign mental stupidly if ms dissapears that was until i got caught out at work today of course

MumTum sorry you are being sick but yay for all the extra hormones!!

Mels your bleeding has us all puzzled....anything since the feet prodding?? Glad you found the guy to be good.

Cep I shall be having several glasses of wine for you tonight.

Thought for the day..."Lorraine Candy shut up moaning, some of us would love to be pregnant for the 1st time let alone the 4th"

Why I read the Daily Mail I don't know. There are a million pregnancy articles on there today and I just want to tell them to shut it!!

OMG get this...husband has just emailed in response to my email saying how I felt (thought it might be easier to write it all down as I tend to just burst into tears when I say it) and he says comment last night was "a joke" and said with a smile on his face.

I don't get his sense of humour.....

Just a tiny (as it a few drops) bit since first thing Cep. I'm not sure what to think any more. Think that unless it starts properly again I'll stick to the plan of opks from tomorrow. Sick of this limbo. Sorry everyone for my moaning x

Just picked dd up from nursery, she gave me a mothers day card that brought tears to my eyes, she had got them to write 'i love my mummy because she helps me to ride my bike and we make cakes together'. She did spoil it a bit though when we got home and she told me that she would rather have stayed at nursery for tv time than come home with me!

Ms already mumtum??!!! I'm telling you, there's (at least) 2 in there!!!!

bump step away from the daily mail...I have to confess though that I've got absolutely no idea who Lorraine candy is? Your dp does indeed have a strange sense of humour, maybe it's just that he's hiding how frightened he is that it'll happen again?

Collie I forgot you earlier, I am sorry - am so glad the doctor has been helpful and you have an appt booked for Monday, even if it is a horrible reminder of what happened (hmm, I say. Having failed to make my own appt for the same reasons). And sorry that you had a horrible dream, you poor thing.

bumpwanted I bet he'll understand after tonight's chat and will see who visibly distressed you are (just in case, hold up a sign saying 'I am visibly distressed'. Wouldn't it be lovely if they could read our minds? No flipping chance in our household .

Mumtum Sick in the loos twice? OMG, that is very early! I hope you are coping with it okay. I know it must be reassuring to have a symptom but a shame you get it so full on. And I imagine it must be very hard not to stress out.

Cep I'm sorry, why is there a time limit? Am being nosey

Hi Loup Would love to know more answers to your question too!

Melie Congratulations on your smoothed out tubes! I have no idea what that means but it sounds kind of good. Am so sorry that your cycle is out of sync. Can I ask if it has been like this since the mc or did it go funny on this cycle? I hope you don't mind me asking, am new to the thread and have lots of catching up to do.

And hello to everyone else!

Melies you did make me laugh. I have stepped away! Lorraine Candy is the editor of Glamour or one of those magazines and she's written some article about how hard it is for her being pregnant for the 4th time!

MumTum do you have any twins in your family? That would be so exciting!

Really I have a tendancy to become incoherent when visibly distressed and then make noises that only a dog could hear so I think the sign might prove useful for him!

I have to say, if he honestly said it as a joke I think he is a total moron. Ashamed you all now know what an idiot my husband can be !!

really before my mc I was a 28 days girl, I would have 2 days of brown spotting then heavy flow for 2 days then it would tail off over the next 4. After my mc I bled for 2 weeks, then a week later I had a heavy bleed with no pain whatsoever over the course of a day, then lighter bleeding for 2 days, then it stopped. I was told that that was af. 2 days later I had more light bleeding for about 5 days, gp said it was cervical erosion. 9 days after that, last weds, I started bleeding again (are you still with me?!) but it was really mucousy and not like af at all. Then last night I had cramps and normal period blood, but now that's practically stopped too, although I still have cramps. So who knows?!!

Melies did you have a scan to check it had all come away properly??

I had a scan 4 weeks ago which was fine, and several negative tests since so it's not retained products. The gp I saw on Monday was unconcerned. He just said it takes 3 months to get back to normal. I just hate not knowing where I am in my cycle tbh.

Hello!

I have been lurking for ages but have just been prompted to post because I have no idea what's going on with my cycle this month and am really freaked out - would massively appreciate any advice at all...

Basically, I discovered I had a mmc at the end of Jan when we went for the 12 wk scan. Totally normal period, no spotting or anything, on the 13th of March. I'm now on cd19 and what I think is 8dpo of I guess the 2nd post mc cycle. Tons of brown blood on Saturday (cd14), sharp pain on the left-hand side on Mon, brown blood going a bit pinky, and today v painful pains from womb area and a gush of bright red blood. Period's not due for at least a week and it doesn't seem like period blood - no lining bits or anything like that.

Sorry, this is a bit long, but I just don't understand what my body is doing and I HATE it - has this happened to anyone else?

mel just back from my reflexology too - I had it post m/c and it helped get rid of the stuff that stubbornly wouldn't move, have had 3 sessions since and my reflexologist who specialises in sub-fertility and ante natal reflexology worked to ease the bumps in my fallopian tubes and also around my pelvis - I could feel the bumps too. There must be some benefit in it bcs I've had the first normal 28 day cycle with o/v slap bang in the middle I can ever remember, without stimulation. I really, really hope it settles things for you. Drink loads of water to wash away any toxins that are floating about and get an early night if you can
I'm keeping mine going as long as I can.

Thanks everyone else for nice msgs, I'm still in shock, just been to see my parents but decided not to tell them anything yet as Dad is back and forth from the hospital a lot at the moment.

collie dream sounds unsettling, FX for a good scan for you on Monday hun x

cep from lurking I realise you're scanning next Tues too, will be thinking of you too love x

bump sorry that you were upset this am, pleased DP has explained, though I'm with you and don't get that sense of humour! I am too about people whinging about being updiffed, insensitive idiots, the ladies are right step away from the magazine tho!!

mumtum sounding awfully like twins to me

harassed hope you're doing ok love?

Chloe hope you're ok? xx

Waves to Rue Loup Laylas Wellie and to everyone else,

Porpentine so sorry x posts, so sorry to hear about your loss , welcome here, glad you've posted, the ladies here are amazing.

Can I ask a couple of questions? Have you had a negative test since your m/c, have you had a follow up scan to check there's nothing retained? Do hope you've had the all clear.

If you read up a little you'll see that mel's GP has suggested that it can take up to 3 cycles to settle down after m/c , but if you're concerned or in pain, then I'd urge you to get some proper medical advice (((hugs))) we're all here to listen and help x

Awh Melies so sorry your cycle is playing around hon. I can imagine you are just fed up of it now. Very encouraged to head of Blackkats reflexology feedback and really hope it helps you. Sounds like you might need a couple of sessions but that it really has a positive effect.

Hi Porp can't offer any advice I'm afraid as I haven't had AF since MC yet. Am getting niggly pains so hoping it is on its way this weekend. If so, it will mean my cycle started from day one the day I stopped bleeding with MC. No idea if that is normal!

I did see that about the 3 cycles thing, I suppose I'm just reluctant to accept it... No scan or test, but had an erpc and have had a period since so presumed all ok - does it sound like it might not be? Think I'm going to the doctors tomorrow, where I'm sure she will just say it takes time, but at least I'll have checked and I can ask about the follow-up scan thing. This whole experience is so hideous and frustrating, I can't believe its so common...

Porp so sorry hun. I am sure you must be so frustrated. I hate it when our bodies don't do what we want. I think you are right to go to the doctors and I would demand a scan to have it double checked. I have no experience in this area so please don't take it that I mean there might be something wrong but you are obviously concerned and unsettled by it and I think if you can get some reassurance it might make you feel a bit better. Sending you a big xx