Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake, wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting, weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 15)

[meliesmummy]

Hello! If you have recently miscarried and are thinking of or actively trying again come and join us! We offer plenty of cake, tea and wine if needed! Come in and laugh, cry and rant as needed, and don't be afraid of asking whatever questions you need answers to and we'll try our best to answer them.

Add yourself to the stats list whenever you are ready.

wtcc = waiting to try to conceive
ucl = usual cycle length
wtf cycle = the time after your mc when you have no idea whats going on with your normal cycle

Lets hope this is a lucky thread and we all get our bfps!

part 14 of the thread

stats to follow

sorry to hear your news stitch big hugs, glad you have your mum around for a sympathetic ear x

Oh Stitch I am so sorry to hear your news, that?s utterly crap. And on your lovely trip too. So sorry for you sweet, sounds like you were very brave while away though. I?m glad to hear that DH has been lovely and that you have your mum to lean on too.

I tell you, one thing I?ve realised these past few weeks is that FR and CB that have such early tests have a lot to answer for. I was very guilty of using them and testing way to early, but I am not sure I would now, it doesn?t seem worth the pain.

((hugs)) for stitch I hope you get lots of love and hugs in RL to get you through it.

Glad he slept better Cep

Sorry to hear about the cp stitch, how was new York otherwise?

I feel completely drained, like I could just go to bed now and sleep till tomorrow :(. Dh is cooking dinner because I can't pull myself off the sofa, I haven't felt this awful since the first few days after the mc. I survived soft play but got v grumpy when I had to go across town to the sorting office to fetch dds ballet shoes only to discover they had sent the wrong size! I tried to send them back but the sorting office didn't have any working scales (?!) so I'll have to go to the post office tomorrow. Then when I got home we had missed another parcel (presumably my opks) so I have to go back again! We had a nice afternoon, took dd to see 'the way back home', if it ever comes to a theatre near you I can recommend it, it was lovely.

melie - you don't sound right at all. Would it be worth going to see your GP? At the very least they could maybe recommend something to make you feel a bit better?

stitch I'm so sorry to hear your news. I agree with Collie, early tests do make things a bit harder in some ways. When my mum was having kids, there were no tests and you just had to wait and wonder. There were no scans either!!! And funnily enough, she never had an mc ... although had very irregular periods ... so my question is, did she really never have an mc? Or did she just not know about it.

thumb and flg thanks for the info about your ov dates. After my last mc I thought I didn't ov, but maybe I just missed it. And flg, you're still young - it probably is worth waiting (assuming it's not months!!).

We'll definitely try again this cycle harassed. I've never conceived again after mc without having a cycle first so I'm not hopeful it'll be a success. But I can't not try! Try and not think too much about those awful anniversaries. I know it's hard ...

Chloe, I'm hesitant to suggest this as I don't know your history very well, but could it have been an implantation bleed yesterday? I always get my bfp's very late, never before or on the day af is due.

mel second ochaye, would be a good idea to call drs tomorrow.

Hi all

melie I'm thinking ochaye and cep must be right about the docs, it just doesn't sound right. Maybe you need an iron supplement? I know that low iron makes you really tired- I'm no doctor though!

stitch so sorry to hear your news. Hope you're ok and glad you have a great dh and mum to look after you. Sending a hug x

fx for the anyone on the tww

Thanks for all the lovely congrats messages. Still got the pains and am trying really hard not to test every day just to make sure it's still there! Trying to be more positive this time, as last time I had brown bleeding from a week before af which just never stopped and it never really 'felt right'.
Meant to be doing a zumba class tomorrow night-which i love- but am worried if i go it might all go wrong? Do you think it's too early and i shouldn't risk it?
God I'm going to be a nervous wreck for the next 9 months-which i know is just what everyone wants the chance to be so don't at all want to sound ungrateful-i'm just terrified it'll all end in the next two weeks! [nervous emoticon]

minnie - I don't think the zumba class would really hurt but if something were to go wrong, you might blame yourself for doing it, so perhaps give it am iss until you're a bit more secure?

melie - you need to go to the doc and get your blood levels checked, sounds like you're losing/have lost too much for your own good and you need to know your haemoglobin level.

Thanks for all your worrying about me but it's a right pain to get bloods done around here! You have to go to the gp for a form, then fight hunt for a parking space at the hospital, sit in a queue for about an hour, have the blood taken, then phone the drs daily for the results only to discover they are lost/not on the system/not back yet/the gp who ordered them is ill/on holiday/not in and no one else is free. If I still feel awful on sat I'll do a finger prick and use the machine at work I think. I'll see how I go. Ive got reflexology this morning anyway so can't go today because the surgery have training on thurs afternoons anyway.

stitch I am so sorry you sound like such a lovely person managing to hold it together for the sake of your dh's feelings. I know why you did but I think I would have fallen to pieces, I am so glad you managed to contain the emotion until you got home - that must have been very hard.

melie you sound like I was feeling for a little while. It is def worth speaking to someone if you can. I hope your day today is better than the one before. Chin up my lovely.

ochaye I so wish that I could get excited about the prospect of it being an implanation bleed but for the past few months I have been on Clomid I have tended to spot for a week or two then have a full blown horrendous period (like melie explained). I am utterly convinced I did not ovulate this time round as I am now 5 days later than my last cycle and if Clomid had anything going for it it was regulating me to a much more friendly 31 days! So, it just goes to prove that my last consultant was shit and I have taken the drugs pointlessly this month! STill waiting on my appointment through from next town consultant.

Morning,

Stitch I'm so very sorry to hear your news, and you've been so brave. I think these early testing preg tests make it a lot harder on all of us. Huge ((()))'s.

Chloe did you do anything about seeing a kinesiologist?? Just that my af/cycle changed so much for the better after starting to see mine. Going again on Monday when I'll be cd27 after latest mc, so she can check all my levels.

Minnie I don't think zumba would do any harm, but I think you'd use it as a stick to beat yourself with if, god forbid, anything should go wrong. I 've been wondering if the running the week before my bfp caused my latest mc. In my head I know it didn't, but then hormones don't really make you rational!!

Mel I think you should get checked out lovely.

I'm stupildy symptom spotting. On one hand I want a bfp, but on the other I'm absolutely flipping terrifed!!

Ooh and hopefully tonight we're going to view a house! Fingers x'd it's lovely as it's the area I want.

Morning ladies

Stich I am so so sorry hun. You have been amazingly strong and I am glad you have your Mum and DH for some cuddles at this time. The more I hear of stories like this the more I think those early tests really shouldn't have been created as it is so disappointing and upsetting.

Mel hun if you are going to wait to go to the docs at least take some iron supplements. You sound totally drained. I know you are super busy but could you call in sick - sounds like you need to rest for a day or two.

Minnie do you do zumba usually? if so and you are used to it they usually say it is ok provided it doesn't put a strain on your tummy. I know yoga teachers won't teach pregnant people for the first 12 weeks unless you are really used to it and know your body so I guess it depends on whether you do it regularly.

Harassed very exciting about the house. Where abouts are you looking?

Morning Cep Loup Collie Chloe Thumb and anyone else I've left off.

News from Bump today...we finally DTD !!

Thanks for your lovely messages, it is so great to know other people understand what i?m going through as haven't told anyone in RL here.

I would love to have my mum for cuddles but being on the other side of the world it?s a bit difficult so DH has to do the job.

Did break down a bit last night and DH has agreed that we are going to have a 'chat' about our future at the beginning of next month. He is crazy busy at work and going back home for a wedding at the end of the month so now is not the best time. I don?t really have the support in RL that I need over here at the moment and I don?t think I'm coping very well emotionally with the losses.

Kind of feel like I?m just going through the motions and waiting for life to happen, financially it makes much more sense to have a baby here and get all my work maternity benefits etc... But then I also don?t think it?s good for me to let it be the sole focus of my life and as we have been talking about a move maybe we just need to get on and do it now. Would love to move back home but likewise happy to settle for something just a bit closer than a 24 hour flight.

I do agree that the early tests are not good for the heartache they can cause when this happens but the doctor has stressed that I do need to test on the first day of my missed period and that was when I got the BFP. I need to know asap so that they can get the drugs right to prevent miscarriage. With no treatment I have a 1 in 10 chance of a live birth, that gets better with the drugs but they do have to get the dose right.

Go bump with the DTD action

Stitch - where are you now and where is home? Agree that being the other side of the world from your family is rough - am in the same position with my Dad etc. - it's hard!

Bump - yay for DTD!

Harassed - symptom spotting is difficult to switch off, isn't it.

thumbwitch - I'm in the UK and home is Australia, I love living here but just wish it wasn't so far away at times like this.

Morning all, stitch i hope a chat with DH does the trick and you work out what's best for you, not sure where home is for you but I know after mc (which I haven't told my mum about) I would have loved to just go back to her house and hideaway. Big hugs for you.

Yay bump for DTD, fingers crossed for the next couple of weeks.

harrassed i know what you mean about symptom spotting. I am now comparing every day to the month I did get my BFP when I spotted on and off for 14 days before a BFP - this time no spotting so change my mind between thinking that's a good thing to thinking i'm obviously not pg. Promised dh I wouldnt do ridiculously early tests and found myself with my head pressed against the window this morning trying to see an imaginary line on an internet cheapie well I made it to 8dpo rather than last time's ridiculous 5!! When will you test harrassed? and hopeful1 how are you?

Waves to all xx

Awh stich hun I'm so sorry you are so far away from family and your DH is busy. Bad things always seem to happen at the worst time. I had my MC and my husband was then away on business for 3 weeks (left the day it happened) and it was so hard. I actually got a bit stronger when he was away but when he got back I seemed to go back a step and was crying a lot. Its only natural for you to be feeling really emotional - don't think you are not coping because you are - this is a really sad and upsetting time and your feelings are perfectly natural.

Do you think it might be worthwhile going to the doctor and asking if you can speak to someone about what has happened? Might help to talk to a third party and just get it all out. I seriously considered it as I felt so low just before my AF but things seem to have gotten a lot better now so I think it just take time.

Sending you a virtual hug!

Ah Loup I remember the days of our ridiculous 5DPO testing!!!! I think you have done very well to get to 8...fingers crossed for the next few days.

I just can't switch off the symptom spotting no matter how hard I try! I've weaned myself off ov stick and stopped poas stupidly early so that at least is progress .

Loup I'm going to test on Monday. It'll be cd27 of a usual 28 day cycle, but I'm seeing my kinesiologist in the afternoon so will be good to know if I can. I have one internet cheapie!!

Well yes bump i see i've made progress! I've been fine up until today, for some reason I am overly obsessed today and not really sure when AF due as on cd31 already but didn't ovulate until cd22/23 - anyway shall probably continue peeing on internet cheapies to satisfy my urge! Must stay away from Boots at lunchtime......

Good luck hihp, the internet cheapies didnt give me a BFP until dpo14 last time however see that I do not take my own advice in any way...... For once this weekend will be a slow one I suspect!

Opposite to me then Stitch! Perhaps I should send you to my Dad and I'll go visit your mum and we can trade hugs?

I'm hoping to get back to the UK in May though - just trying to persuade DH to come with us this time, he's not keen (he's Aussie) but we'll miss his birthday if he doesn't come. :(
I have a gynae appt on June 7th and can't miss it - it took 4m to get that one!

Hi guys. Sorry its been so long again! I've been lurking, but never get the time to actually sit down and write something.

stitch I'm so sorry to hear your news, must make it twice as hard when life is hectic and you're so far from family. I know its not the same, but you always have us guys. Really really hope things start getting better for you soon (huge hugs) xx

mellies how are you now? hope you're feeling better. I know how you feel about the doctors, i live in a small town where its nearly impossible to get tests, and the nearest hospital that'll do them and scans is over an hour away. But if this carries on please get yourself checked out, you can't carry on feeling this rough!

Huge congrats minnie on the BFP.

bump yay for DTD!

harrassed good luck with the house.

Sorry for everyone i've missed, hope all is well with you.
As for me...Still feeling sick every morning, but did a test on Sun morn and BFN :( not sure if its just too early to detect, or if the symptoms are all in my head! Not sure when AF is due because of MC but i've locked the sticks away and am trying my hardest not to test again for at least another week!

Thanks bump angela loup and thumbwitch, it does help knowing you are all thinking of me.

Sorry about the me rant before, it is quite good to actually write it all down and just get it off my chest. I am OK but just a bit down at the moment - coming back from holidays always makes you a bit flat and this just added to things.

stitch I know what you mean about going through the motions, I felt that way after my mc and like I wasn't really 'here' iykwim? It must be so tough for you away from your family, especially if dh is busy, the end of the month seems like a long way away for your chat though.

Stay strong 2 week waiters!

Enjoy bump!

I think I will have to go back to the gp (I am spending far too much time in that waiting room!), I can't even get through today without a sleep, ive picked dd up, put her to bed and gone to my bed. Sooo tired. Im not working until sat, but I don't think I can phone in sick for being tired, the NHS sickness policy is really strict, 3 periods of sickness in a year and you have to have an informal interview, another one within a year after that and it's a formal warning so I try to only be off when I am really ill. On the plus side my tampons are lasting 3 hours at a time today!

mel glad you've decided to go back to the drs.

stitch i'm sorry you're feeling so low at the moment, is only natural, and don't worry about having mememe moments on here, we all do it.

bump yay for dtd.

angela sorry for bfn, hopefully was just to early.

fx for all 2 weeks waiters.

Angela you poor love it must be so fristrating. Well done for trying to hang on with the testing. I hope you get a BFP soon.

Melies glad you are going back to the docs. Wow your work policy is strict. Mind you, if they interviewed you I think you have a pretty good reason for being off given you've had a MC. I do understand though that employers are not always as sympathetic as we'd hope.

Loup resist the boots urge!

My OV sticks have arrived. Am hanging on until 3pm to test and I am busting for the loo. Seriously, had a small drink of grapefruit juice (thank you Cep) at lunch with my food and I really need to go!!!!!