Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake, wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting, weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 12)

[KnitterNotTwitter]

A safe place for everyone on the TTC after MC rollercoaster. Welcome and come in - virtual wine and chocolate for all, and lots of support and hand-holding until you get your BFP!

The thread moves fast but don't let that put you off - feel free to come along and stay to chat; or dip in and out with any questions.

If you want to join the stats, just add yourself to the list:

WTTC = waiting to TTC
UCL = usual cycle length

Good luck to all - here's hoping for lots of healthy, sticky BFPs by the end of the thread

For reference here's a link back to the previous thread

Latest stats to follow in a moment!

Nix I hope you're having a nice rest after your 1st week back
DW glad to hear you're feeling a bit better, no need to apologise we all have off-days - or weeks in my case
AandR I'm so if your building plans, and so looking forward to hearing about it. I just want to sell our pesky flat we've rented out then we can buy a house
Knitter glad you're making progress on FF and chart. Someone said that TCOYF says rely on body signs 1st so must be something in it
Mummya glad the counseling is helping, it's a good positive step. My counseling helped me no end, and I went back for a top-up session last week to sort me out. Well worth it
Chloe me and DH love Red Dwarf! When it was time to leave work the other day I sent him a text to 'break out the jet powered rocket pads and junior bird man the hell outta here' too far?
Izzy at Victoria sponge and wistful thinking about doing that with a dc one day
Mouse sorry you still have a BFP, fx your list happens soon

Curry was good even if I do say so myself. DH sounded a bit surprised when he complemented it cheeky! I'm venturing out first time on my own to go shopping today, silly as that sounds, since my bleeding [brave smile]

grrrr just did a huge post n lost it!

in summary;

hello to all
I've got FF crosshairs a day earlier than expected so I'm panicking (for no reason lol).

Will be back to catch up later properly

Hurrah just sitting on the plane waiting for take off so thought I'd have a quick catch up. Am so excited! Still no sign of AF which is a bit frustrating but think I'll worry about that when I get back.

Oops better go as I'm being told to turn my phone off. Have a great couple of weeks ladies and here's to the SMEG SMEP experiment!

hadrian have a fab time x

velvet why the panic? Did you get plenty of swi in?

orange the Victoria sponge cake didn't rise properly and was more of a Victoria sponge biscuit which we had to disguise by smothering in melted chocolate so don't be you're on your way now so soon it will be your turn to trash the kitchen with dcs while making very bad cakes

Cd14 here and cbfm still on low - this is unheard of. Had a most impressive temp jump this morning which would seem to indicate otherwise, but then again that may just have been the

right time to catch up :)

hadrian have a great time. I am very too!

I love Red Dwarf too to those who have been talking about it. It reminds me of my mispent youth

orange glad to see you are venturing out and that things seem to have settled down for you.

AandR i am also jealous of your building plans. I'm all excited at the moment coz we are getting our bathroom done so dont know how I would be about a whole house!

helloooo Izz yrmotb how are you 2 getting along? Quite a bit of SWI but I wasnt expecting it to be on day 13 thats all even though thats when I had loads of eggnog. DH also REFUSED to DTD this morning even though bil was not in because I am going out tonight and he says that proves that I am not commited to having a baby. He thinks I should only have a life during AF. I can't carry on like that!

Mummya I'm glad that your counselling went well and that DH is keen - at least that's part of the battle won!

and anyone I've missed

Hello all,
In the interests of science I am pleased to report very good results from the grapefruit juice
BUT may need to take me off the SMEP list for this cycle as DH had emergency root canal treatment this am [serious pain emoticon]
He's asleep now from the painkillers so there may be some hope for later
Will update progress tomorrow

you can't put your life completely on hold for three weeks every month until you get your bfp - you'll go mad! Fx you've done enough anyway.

I'm still waiting for ov, and not sure that cbfm has got it right (is still on low, should have gone to high by now) so we'll see...

I have a feeling yrmotb might be away for the weekend but anyway x

mummya how did the secnod counselling session go?

Ooh, love the new available. Does alcohol (of the real variety, rather than the virtual!) the night before increase temp the following morning?

Velvet you go and enjoy yourself, perhaps you can remind your DH that being relaxed and happy has a positive effect on TTC so going out is in fact a vital part of the grand plan!

Izzy the cake still sounds good - if its covered in chocolate it will be delicious in any case. Reading that has made me want to bake too - last time I made Nigella's chocolate guinness cake, might look that recipe out tonight. Any recipe that starts by melting an entire pack of butter into a can of guinness, then adding chocolate, has to be good.

DW , Pink and Izzy thanks for the acupuncture info , will do some googling this afternoon.

Blackkat pleased you had a good day yesterday, hope today is good too. It was really useful reading your info on monitoring and clomid too.

Mouse your list sounds perfectly reasonable to me too. If you find the magic cure please do share!!

Chloe did you POAS yet? Keeping everything crossed for you (well, nearly everything).

Can I sign up for the SMEG plan too, as soon as af arrives.

Sorry for the self-pitying post the other day. Feeling much better today and a lot more relaxed about everything. Have been tracking temps and although I'm on day cycle day 48, ff isn't predicting af til end of next week - first month charting so really interested to see if this is right.

just came on to boast that FF has a new game where you guess when ovulation occured - I have just done the first 5 charts and got 100% correct back later for a proper catch up and to finish the game!

xxxxxxxxxx

Happy Saturday everyone. Just catching up on all I?ve missed.

Firstly, collie is back after popular demand After a rethink, perhaps some desperate sad case is not how I want to be portrayed (even though it might be true), I think a happy bouncy border collie is much better!! And I am pretty sure noone is sad enough to stalk me?.. if only my life was interesting enough to be worth stalking!

chloe I wonder if I can beat your strange dream?.my male cat was pregnant and I was beside myself with jealousy!!...and not at all perturbed by the fact that he?s a boy!!! It was actually a couple of nights ago but only just remembered. Think I am losing it.

Have you POAS stick yet chloe ? fx for you xxx

mummya so glad the counselling went well and that dh is positive about it. I really hope it helps you both. You are so kind and caring of everybody, always saying the right things, you deserve a break. Xx

blackkat glad you were feeling better yesterday, a day without tears is good, but don?t be too hard on yourself if they come back unexpectedly. Hope you are still ok today? X

izzy is the cbfm the clear blue monitor thingy? Have you used it before? Is it any good?

Zam I too can report good results from the grapefruit. Only on day 3 and had no cm over past week (ish) but had some yest and more today. Not loads, but don?t think its that ?time?.

velvet I think dh comments about you not being committed are utter tripe!! You are entitled to a drink and need to be able to let of steam. Its easy for him to say when hes not the one stressing and thinking about ovulation and being pg every since minute of every day. I?d like to see him not drink all blooming month!

Mouse I hope your are ok? How are you doing? Thinking of you. I can almost match your 50 opks?I have 40 more on order?and a stash in the cupboard

Hope everyone is doing something nice today/tonight?? I bought tickets to the little theatre in our village a couple of weeks ago. Thought they were for last night only to find it was closed and they are for next week!! I?m such a plonker! I would have blamed that on ?baby brain? 2 months ago?. Is there any such thing as ttc brain??

Have been out today for lunch with mum, aunt and nan. Mum brought up my neighbour friends being pregnant and I told them I cried when I got the news. ?Oh you should be pleased for them? ?did you send them a nice text back?? ?it will be your turn soon? ?. Aghhh FECK OFF will you!!! Seriously!!

Anyway, little rant over, just good to get that out of my system.

Off to the cinema tonight. DH wants to watch something on 3D?horn I think. No idea what its about?.anyone?? Will I regret it???

PS No AF for me yet??. Aaghhhhhhhhh

PPS Mummya and your ff game score. I am not sure if I should be please or worried for you!! lol

Hi collie I'm ok thanks, met a friend this afternoon and was able to talk through everything very honestly -the back to back miscarriages and the job stresses which was v cathartic. She asked if I thought I could be depressed but I honestly think it's just grief and stress. Not a great combo but I dint think I have depression.

Did I tell you my boss phoned again yesterday to tell me her and the deputy would like a chat tomorrow after work to 'catch me up' so I'm stressed about that because I don't believe that's what it will be. Surely they could catch me up (on the 9 days I've missed) in an email?

Grr. This is not good for ttc.

izzy good luck with the cbfm

velvet there's no way I could give up my social life indefinately for ttc I'd go mad! Tell him to bugger off

mummy hope the counselling helps you and DH

Waves to all I've missed xx

Hi all,

Just got back from a lovely family trip to the local butterfly farm, DS loves it there

Izz My counselling session was really good actually. I've learned loads already. Both the couples therapist and my own therapist think I have post traumatic stress disorder because the mmc complications went on for so long and involved so many nasty procedures, and my own therapist pointed out that after my mc I went through the classic stages of denial, anger, guilt but instead of then going on to sadness/depression and then acceptance and recovery I put everthing on hold because the medical problems escalated. So I focussed on getting through them instead of dealing with my feelings. Now that I have the "all clear" from the medical problems I have suddenly got really depressed. (picking up where I left off!) Makes a lot of sense.

Velvet I agree with the others, anything to take pressure off, make you feel relaxed is a GOOD thing, not bad thing. Here is a tip from my therapist that I tried last night : when you are spending time together, like on a date, ask him things like "what was it that attracted you to me when we first met?" "What did you like about spending time with me" Give them lots of time to answer and watch their face and body language change as they go all romantic and smiley remembering the good times It totally changes the atomostphere/ their attitude !

Zam interesting gusset news Perhaps we need a list/graph/science prize for this experiment. How much did you drink by the way? I am still on one glass a day, nothing yet but its early in my cycle.

mouse PLEASE give them a leaflet from the miscarriage association, these people are not acting as they should! Maybe seeing in print from a reputable organisation what they should be doing will embarrass them into behaving better? I hope to god they are not going to be pressuring/bullying you in that meeting. Why not email the leaflet and say something like "it seems like I am in the unusual situation of being the first person in the workplace to be in these circumstances. I am just learning about miscarriage and its effects myself and was given this to pass on to you, it may be helpful to you as a guide not only to understand my cirucmstances but for other women that this may happen to in the future" ? "
and/or
"I am happy to talk about work I have missed, but considering the extra stress that I am under at the moment, it would be easier if we could do this via email unless you consider a face to face meeting absolutley necessary. "

Sorry if I am overstepping the mark here, just feeling very on your behalf and would like to give these people a peice of my mind myself!!

collie's back!

mouse sorry that should be "feeling very on your behalf"

SATURDAY'S LIST

Chloe55 TTC #2, cycle 5 post MC#2 UCLrandom CD29
KnitterNotTwitter TTC#2, MC#2, cycle 6 UCL 25-30 CD26
BackOnceAgain TTC#3, Cycle 6 UCL28-32 CD22
Getawiggleon TTC#2, Cycle? UCL28-32 CD21
AandRmum TTC3 cycle 4 UCL29 CD 17
Velvetcu TTC #1 Cycle 6 UCL 30-33, CD16
ZamMummyInGabs TTC#3 cycle 2 postMC#2 UCL26-28, CD15
IzzyWizzyletsgetbusy TTC#3 cycle 7 UCL 24-30 CD14
Loola2shu TTC#3 Cycle 6 UCL35-38,CD13
Youremindmeofthebabe TTC#2, Cycle 6 UCL33 CD12
Kat2504 ttc#1 cycle 6 ucl28, CD8
Cep TTC#2 Cycle 2 UCL24-28 CD8
Ochaye TTC#3 cycle 1 UCL 31 CD6
MummyAbroad TTC #2, cycle 2 (Post AS Op)) UCL28 CD5

WTTC
Choccybick TTC#1 (post mc1) cycle 6 UCL 27
Barrenbrook TTC#1, MC#4 Oct 2010
Hadrian TTC#1, MC#1 Dec 2010, WTF cycle
Mousebacon TTC#2 MC#2
Collie TTC#1 MC#1 Dec 2010

MIA
BrownB TTC#1 cycle 1 (post MC2) UCL 24-26

RECENT BFP's
Digitalgirl TTC#2, MC#3 Oct 2010
Emoo TTC#2, Cycle 1 (post MC1) UCL 26-30, 30/1/11
DachshundsRule TTC#1 cycle 5 UCL28 CD31 BFP 25 Jan 2011
Hairytriangle TTC#1 cycle 1 (post MC2) UCL ?28 BFP Jan 2011
Tigger15 TTC#2 cycle 22 UCL24-9 CD29 BFP 16 Jan 2011
Pinkfondantfancy TTC#1, cycle 5, UCL 28-35 CD29 BFP!!
Lemonsherbert BFP 18 Jan 2011
HongKongBaby#2, cycle 5 (post mc1), UCL 37, CD30 BFP 18 Jan 2011
MamaPower TTC#1, cycle 5 (post MC#2) UCL 25- 27 CD28
Wombat33 TTC#1 Cycle 3 (post MC) UCL 31
LadyBee TTC#2, cycle 5 (round 3) UCL27 CD27
Owlbooty TTC#1, cycle 5
Nickstermum TTC#2 cycle 2 post MC UCL 30-40
PrettyQuichey TTC#1, (round 7) UCL 28-30
Lovebeingadaddysgirl TTC#? WTC cycle
GetDownYouWillFall TTC#2

RECENT GRADUATES
BUnderthebonnet BFP 20 June
Muser BFP 22 June
northerngoldilocks - BFP 12 July
Magic8ballhastheanswers BFP 14 July
Hopefully BFP 22 July
IvySedai BFP 1 August
PenguinsMummy BFP 15th August
VivClicquot BFP 25 August
Loopymumsy BFP 29 August
CaribouMoo BFP 7 September
StarflowerGirl BFP 24 Sep
Appleblossoms BFP 9 Oct
Littlemiss72
Urbanlolly BFP 1 Nov
Inbetweener BFP 10 Nov

Thank you mummya I really appreciate your support and I will give them that leaflet. I'm also prepared to explain that my body still thinks it's pg so I'm yet to deal with leaking milk and losing hair (both of these things happened last time) not to mention the hormone crash that's headed my way. If the meeting starts to go the way I think it's going to go I've decided to be brave and stop the meeting and ask to reschedule when I have someone there to support me.

Can't believe I have to worry about this!

At least I don't have mrsa this time

xxx

evening all, hope you've all had a good day so far.

mummya so pleased counselling is going well so far. Sounds sensible to me that you focused so much on all the procedures rather than focusing on the grieving process.

mouse so sorry that emp is adding to the stress. As others have said they're not allowed to do anything based on the pregnancy that' why sickness related to pregnancy doesn't count towards the sick total. Fx for the meeting that it is a simple catch you up.

velvet Relaxing is a fundamental part of ttc. All the advice is to relax about it all. Do you go out often?? does he? (just out of interest) it just doesn't seem sensible to think that 1 evening out means you're not serious about it all.

blackkat glad you're starting to feel better.

I can't remember if i asked this or not but is ff 338746 anyone on here?? just wondered cause i ok'd them as friend but can't get to see who they are or anything about them, but maybe i'm doing it wrong.

Hello to everyone else hope you're all ok.

mouse so sorry to hear that work is so sh*te. I don't think that work can have a "difficult" conversation (if that's what you are thinking) without giving you written notice and offering you the right to have someone with you.

However, irrespective of that they are clearly being outrageous given what has happened to you recently, hope the mummya leaflet does the trick. Outraged on your behalf.

mummya sounds like you had a lovely day - the butterfly farm sounds beautiful. So glad to hear that your sessions have helped. You are a tower of strength on so many of these boards, thank you x

Collie glad you are back. Good to hear you rant, and I imagined you ranting in the style of Mrs Doyle from Father Ted..splendid! Hope the 3D experience was good?

Lily glad the never-ending Clomid stuff was useful - I was worried I had gone on too much

velvet absolutely concur with all others, fwiw - anything that helps you relax at any time in the month.
personally I tidy up the airing cupboard and then take a peek everytime I go upstairs - having one thing in my life I'm in control of really helps

(((hugs))) blackkat your friend sounds lovely. We had a cremation for mc1 (and have another on march 2nd) and it was a lovely, peaceful service. We were pleased we went. I hope you have the same experience. Thank you for the work advice.

xx

Mouse just popping by to say tell your manager to naff off! How dare they? That's just sooo bad! Get your dh to write them a mail on your behalf, you shouldn't have to deal with that as well :( sorry, outraged for you!

Mummyabroad glad your session and family day have been good:) sounds like you are making progress:)

Waves to everyone, Mwah xx

blackkat we had a cremation service for dc3, it was very very (obviously) but really beautiful. I hope it gives you some peace x

collie I have a love-hate relationship with the cbfm (yes it's the monitor) or the Evil Shag Dictator as it's known on this thread . I've been using it now for 6 months - definitely giving it a break next cycle. In theory it should give you 2-5 "high" days before the 2 "peak" (equivalent of a + on an opk) so you get more warning of ov and therefore more chance to swi upfront. However although I've had a couple of months like that, I often get 6, 10, 12 days of high before the peak which is unhelpful. Then again, my acupuncturist has said she thinks I have some symptoms of pcos so maybe it's just not for me. I know lots of people have more success than me!

mummya what your counsellor says makes a lot of sense. I hope talking it through is helping (although I imagine it's very emotional) and that everything starts to fall into place soon - preferably with a bfp )

Have had a lovely afternoon here watching Tangled in 3D at the cinema and spending lots of lovely money in Monsoon getting a new work outfit and a new casual top, just settling down with a drink now.

mouse I say again, your boss is an Arse. Please don't feel pressurised into anything you're not ready for. Unfortunately it's very difficult for people to understand mc unless they've been through it, but that's no excuse for the lack of respect and compassion that's being shown towards you. Please get dh to deal if you can, I refuse to believe there is anything so urgent they need to meet you tomorrow x

Adding in BlackKat I put you in Waiting to TTC, hope thats alright, dont be shy if you want to move yourself or add more details, just copy and paste the lot if its the next day just change add 1 to everyones CD numbers. (CD is cycle day, you can use your mc/ERPC as CD1 if you like.UCL is usually cycle length)

SATURDAY'S LIST

Chloe55 TTC #2, cycle 5 post MC#2 UCLrandom CD29
KnitterNotTwitter TTC#2, MC#2, cycle 6 UCL 25-30 CD26
BackOnceAgain TTC#3, Cycle 6 UCL28-32 CD22
Getawiggleon TTC#2, Cycle? UCL28-32 CD21
AandRmum TTC3 cycle 4 UCL29 CD 17
Velvetcu TTC #1 Cycle 6 UCL 30-33, CD16
ZamMummyInGabs TTC#3 cycle 2 postMC#2 UCL26-28, CD15
IzzyWizzyletsgetbusy TTC#3 cycle 7 UCL 24-30 CD14
Loola2shu TTC#3 Cycle 6 UCL35-38,CD13
Youremindmeofthebabe TTC#2, Cycle 6 UCL33 CD12
Kat2504 ttc#1 cycle 6 ucl28, CD8
Cep TTC#2 Cycle 2 UCL24-28 CD8
Ochaye TTC#3 cycle 1 UCL 31 CD6
MummyAbroad TTC #2, cycle 2 (Post AS Op)) UCL28 CD5

WTTC
Choccybick TTC#1 (post mc1) cycle 6 UCL 27
Barrenbrook TTC#1, MC#4 Oct 2010
Hadrian TTC#1, MC#1 Dec 2010, WTF cycle
Mousebacon TTC#2 MC#2
Collie TTC#1 MC#1 Dec 2010
BlackKat

MIA
BrownB TTC#1 cycle 1 (post MC2) UCL 24-26

RECENT BFP's
Digitalgirl TTC#2, MC#3 Oct 2010
Emoo TTC#2, Cycle 1 (post MC1) UCL 26-30, 30/1/11
DachshundsRule TTC#1 cycle 5 UCL28 CD31 BFP 25 Jan 2011
Hairytriangle TTC#1 cycle 1 (post MC2) UCL ?28 BFP Jan 2011
Tigger15 TTC#2 cycle 22 UCL24-9 CD29 BFP 16 Jan 2011
Pinkfondantfancy TTC#1, cycle 5, UCL 28-35 CD29 BFP!!
Lemonsherbert BFP 18 Jan 2011
HongKongBaby#2, cycle 5 (post mc1), UCL 37, CD30 BFP 18 Jan 2011
MamaPower TTC#1, cycle 5 (post MC#2) UCL 25- 27 CD28
Wombat33 TTC#1 Cycle 3 (post MC) UCL 31
LadyBee TTC#2, cycle 5 (round 3) UCL27 CD27
Owlbooty TTC#1, cycle 5
Nickstermum TTC#2 cycle 2 post MC UCL 30-40
PrettyQuichey TTC#1, (round 7) UCL 28-30
Lovebeingadaddysgirl TTC#? WTC cycle
GetDownYouWillFall TTC#2

RECENT GRADUATES
BUnderthebonnet BFP 20 June
Muser BFP 22 June
northerngoldilocks - BFP 12 July
Magic8ballhastheanswers BFP 14 July
Hopefully BFP 22 July
IvySedai BFP 1 August
PenguinsMummy BFP 15th August
VivClicquot BFP 25 August
Loopymumsy BFP 29 August
CaribouMoo BFP 7 September
StarflowerGirl BFP 24 Sep
Appleblossoms BFP 9 Oct
Littlemiss72
Urbanlolly BFP 1 Nov
Inbetweener BFP 10 Nov

Morning ladies

Just read the news about Amanda Holden losing her baby and it's brought it all back for me feeling really sad today

Just such an awful thing....

Hello all!

collie I would have been exactly the same. "relax it'll be your turn soon" just doesn't really cut it!!

mouse just wanted to add my outrage to the others'. So wish we could all come with you-that'd scare her!!! what does your union rep say? I think your plan is good that if they overstep the mark you stop the meeting and tell them they can recommence when your union rep is there with you. So sorry you've got all this to deal with.

velvet I am with your DH. I think living your life as if you're not ttc i.e. Actually going out with friends, having a few drinks etc is a) the only way to stay sane and b) relaxing so helpful in the whole process!! How dare he say you're not committed to ttc. I think it's outrageous, sorry :( alternatively, tell him you'll go with his plan as long ad in return he's not drinking tea coffee or booze and not going out except for one week a month-can't imagine he'd be keen for that one??!?!! So if he won't, why should you????

mummya the counselling sounds really positive and what they're saying makes a lot of sense to me.

izz I like your cake-bulking style :) like orange my happy place is thinking about doing that sort of stuff with dc.

I've just bought a book called "how to stop worrying and start living"-a friend of mine highly recommended it-I'll let you know what it's like!!!

Morning all,
Cross me off the SMEP list for this month, humph.
DH's dental work yesterday was NOT mood enhancing, and I'm going to Zambia tomorrow until Weds so looks like will have to wait till next cycle. TCOYF predicts ov for today tho, so toothache permitting will try and sneak in some SWI tonight....