Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake, wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting, weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 12)

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A safe place for everyone on the TTC after MC rollercoaster. Welcome and come in - virtual wine and chocolate for all, and lots of support and hand-holding until you get your BFP!

The thread moves fast but don't let that put you off - feel free to come along and stay to chat; or dip in and out with any questions.

If you want to join the stats, just add yourself to the list:

WTTC = waiting to TTC
UCL = usual cycle length

Good luck to all - here's hoping for lots of healthy, sticky BFPs by the end of the thread

For reference here's a link back to the previous thread

Latest stats to follow in a moment!

Hi,

and sorry if I sound snappy - I do appreciate everybody's support!

wannabe AS is Ashermans Syndrome. video link Its when you get scar tissue growing on the uterus walls or in the cervix usually caused by ERPC, c-sections, traumatic birth or infection. Scar tissue is quite hard to get rid of once established, it tends to just grow right back. I had an operation to remove it and then 6 weeks of high dose estrogen to help the lining grow rapidly before scar tissue can form, also an HSG afterwards to "flush out" any new forming filmy scars. Lots of ladies in the UK dont have access to good health care for this syndrome either. The best AS doctors are in the states and germany. There are only two in the UK (one private, one NHS) but they use slightly different (not as good?) protocols. I chose to get treated in England because it meant being with family which seemed easier at the time, but often suspect I might have been better off going to the USA. The vast majority of women with AS have to travel very far to get treatment, those that dont and have surgery locally nearly always end up with more scar tissue than they started with and then need repeat surgeries (by an expert). I am part of an international group of AS sufferers/Doctors and I read their stories everyday.

At the moment I cant really do anything except wait... and maybe moan a lot to you guys

Thanks Izz you have listened to me go on about this for the longest I think, so you probably know I will find my optimism again soon. xxx

mummya moan away on here as much as you want, that's what we're here for x

I meant it though, I do hope you get your bfp this cycle, you've had a spectacularly rubbish time of things and deserve a break!

Fx the counselling helps a little too. I think so much of it depends in whether you (both) click with the counsellor, so if for any reason either of you feel it's not right, don't be afraid to try someone else x

Izzy Ta.

I hope we get BFP's too!!! The pressure is just unbelievable now, I feel like I am going to explode if it doesnt happen!

We have seen this counsellor before, a few years back when DH got run over by a bus (making our life sound great arent I?) and we also went back for a couple of sessions when I mc'd. Should have done more at that time really but it was hard to get childcare so we let it slide.

much love xxxx

Its sounds awful mummya i just wish there was something i could say.... i have no words that will help.

OMG and your husband beng hit by a bus?? You have really had rotten luck.

I agree, you chole and Izzy have all been on here way to long and are deserving on BFPs. My fingers are crossed tightly for all 3 of you next month (and for myself of course ) Not that i want to get rid of you as you are a fountain of knowledge!!

Hi ladies, can I join?

Am currently having my first MC after ttc #1 for the last 4 months. MC started on Weds at what would have been 5 weeks.

DP and I have decided to start ttc again straight aways as soon as the mc has finished, whenever that may be :(

I have no idea what to expect as don't know anyone else who has had a mc, hormones and emotions are all over the place ATM.

Any advice on what I should do? GP has signed me off work until Mon, but not looking forward to going back.

Welcome Hils Sorry for your loss and that you find yourself here.

By Weds do you meand your mc started yesterday? Gosh that's so recent for you, i'm really sorry.

First of all I would say not to rush back to work on monday that is very soon. I mc late Dec and was due to go back after the christmas break but just couldn't face it. I think it takes more time than you think to physically and emotionally recover.

Its natural for your emotions to be everywhere. One minute you feel you're coping ok, and boom the next minute you are in floods of tears. Just let yourself feel however you feel. I made the mistake of trying to be 'over it' too soon because i felt thats was what was expected. Just give yourself the time you need.

I only joined this thread a week or so ago and the ladies on here have been amazing. Feel free to rant, vent, cry on us, we're here as support if thats what you need.

xxxxxxx

evening all.
izzy that sounds much better than pom juice.

mummya so sorry things have been so difficult for you the last few years. hell being hit by a bus is just bloody awful.

"Decidual bleeding is a term for a partial shedding of the uterine lining during the first few months of pregnancy. This bleeding can be similar to a menstrual period and can occasionally prevent women from realizing that they are pregnant until other signs develop." That's what i think i had last time, and why i got so mental last week.

If this time is a start of a new trend then mine is definately lighter than pre mc. 1st was normal this one lighter.

I need a bit of advice not sure what to do. today is first day of completely no spotting, my possible ov days are 5th, 7th, 9th and 11th. i have to get sessions in that could cover all days but that aren't every other day and having dh moaning. (not groaning .)i had thought of tonight, 6th 9th and 11th. so i mostly have a 2 night gap. but should i wait till i have ewcm? i'm worried that firstly i'll finish him off before ov time and then he won't be able to do it when i really need to. but then i'm also worried that i'll not do it enough and miss it again like last cycle.

What i'm asking is should i do it tonight with no ewcm or leave it. last cycle i seemed to get ewcm at a different time to when i think i ov'd. help..

I hope your session goes well today.

hils so sorry for your loss. i second what dw said, i mc'd beginning of dec and had all of december off. emotions will be everywhere just take the time to feel better at your own pace. the ladies on here are very supportive, feel free to unload on here and ask any questions you may have.

Hils, just to second what DW said really. All too often it seems that we end up being expected to 'get on with it' far sooner than most of us are ever ready.

As far as you MC goes I lost a baby at 5 weeks and a MMC at 12 weeks. The 5 week MC was actually more painful oddly enough although the 12 week did require surgery. If you were anything like me then you will prob have cramps for a few days and some very heavy bleeding, lots of clots and sometimes some people (including myself) witness losing the sac If your bleeding hasn't stopped after a week or so (but be aware that you might have some brown discharge for longer than this) or if you notice a horrible smell or uncomfotableness down below then you need to get back to the doc.

Do not be afraid to go back to the doctor on Monday to be signed off for longer if you feel you need it. The emotional side of things will stick around so much longer than the physical . I am sorry you are here and I hope your stay is short in the nicest possible way

Thanks everyone today for your support earlier. Like you Mummya, I think I am having a shitty day emotionally but lets hope we both feel a littl brighter in the morning

chloe i saw mine as well, had died at 7 weeks, i saw it floating in the sac. it actually made me feel a sense of goodbye cause i'd said no to looking at the scan.

hills I'm sorry for your loss but welcome to the board. I hope you're getting lots of RL support too. Wednesday is very recent - if you mean yesterday, then I think you can usually sign yourself off work for 7 days, ie until next Wednesday. If you've already had a week off, then give your doctor a ring on Monday and I'm sure there won't be a problem getting signed off for longer. Obviously though, if you think you would feel better being busy then you could try going back. Everyone's different with that I think - I had three weeks off and then a weeks holiday (that I'd had booked for ages) and wouldn't have been any use going back sooner x

Hi ladies, sorry some of you are having such a shitty time of it. Today was the first day I've not had plans with someone so I took myself off to the shops but just managed to put myself on a downer seeing all the bumps and babies

I phoned the gp for my results today and everything has come back normal - I'd asked for my thyroid function to be checked. The TSH level was at 1.34 so perfectly suitable for pregnancy. Part of me was disappointed because at least that would have been an answer IYSWIM. Bugger.

My 50, yes 50! OPKs arrived today. Just need to fast forward a few weeks and DH won't know what's hit him!

xx

Thanks all, yes, I do mean yesterday, the last 2 days have been awful. I'll see how I feel on Monday and ring the GP if I can't face work.

My mum kept me company today and I feel a bit more optimistic about the future. Luckily we only told parents so don't have to explain to everyone what happened.

Hils sending you love and hugs and hoping that you won't be on this thread long. It's a horrid thing you are going through but I promise it gets easier. Hugs to all esp MummyA.

Hello ladies, do you mind if I join? Been on the m/c boards and need to make some tentative steps back TTC. I'm sorry to read all your stories, they have provided me with some consolation to know that I'm not alone in going through this. Thank you for sharing.

Hils, so sorry to hear your news. Do get yourself signed off again, your hormones will still be all over the place - i'm about to go into my 4th week away from work and would be next to useless if I was there.

My m/c diagnosed 14/01 at 12 week scan, and finally had emergency ERPC 27/01 (I opted for conservative mgt, that went a bit wrong - feel pretty stupid about that and needing to call an ambulance..) Bleeding finally stopped yesterday.

DH and I TTC #1 since July 2007, diagnosed with PCOS last year and finally fell pregnant after 6x cycles of Clomid. Shock of miscarriage seems to have brought back all the despondency and heartache of TTC in the first place. All our friends are parents, or have become parents since 2007, so we're feeling like life is leaving us behind. Stupid feelings I know.

Nervous about trying again - think we're supposed to wait until first cycle is complete, but without help, I might not ovulate. So wonder if we should just get going just in case!

GP is great and is refering me back to specialist who is also great. Just don't want to miss any more time - m/c feels like we've lost another 4 months of trying.
Perhaps needs to stop obsessing so much, though that's hard.

Hola,

Mouse glad to see you are ok-ish honey xxx good on you for getting back on the horse so soon iykwim. Sorry the tests came back neg - will they test for anything more specific?

mummy you are always/have always been there for everyone else offering good sound advice so the least we can do is support you through a rough spot :) I can understand your frustration, and i think you have been totally calm through the entire shit you have had to endure during the past year....do not worry about ranting on 'ere!
I so hope you get what you need from couples counselling (i think DH and i should follow you!!) and i hope your lining isnt getting thinner. :( (((((hugs)))))

Waves to Izz and babes and all the others on herexxxx welcome to the newbies and i hope your stays are short xxx

welcome newbies :) Everyone on here is fab and it's a good place to be :)

oh mummy I wish I could magic myself to you and give you a real hug, I hope this mahoooosive but virtual one helps a little (((((hugs)))))

welcome hils and black the ladies here are fabulous. Sorry for your losses

awww thanks wheetabixNix a big squishy hug for you.

Hils I am very sorry for your loss. Those first few days are very rough, do look after yourself. Plenty of chocolate, wine and unpasteurised cheese if you can manage it

BlackKat welcome to the thread as well. Please dont feel "stupid" you have been through so much, dont beat yourself up on top of it. Medical management went wrong for me and I spent sometime wondering if things would be different if I had made other choices, but there is no way of knowing. These things really are out of our control and that is what is so scary about it. Feeling left behind/jealous is totally normal, every single one of us on this thread has felt it, so next time you catch yourself saying that your feelings are "stupid" - please delete that word and replace it with "normal"

My personal relationship with obsession is to embrace it wholeheartedly I dont think anyone can be nonchalant about TTC after mc, why pretend?

mouse your collection rivals mine! I take it you will be weeing twice a day? Sorry about all the pregnant tummies. We need pregnancy blinkers

blackkat so sorry for your loss and welcome to the thread. they're wonderful ladies on here.

mummya how did it go? sorry if asking to early have no idea of time difference.

ok wierd blood moment. I've had no red blood last few days and no spotting at all today, went to loo earlier and had a few drops of bright red when wiped, soon went after few more wipes. what on earth is going on with me.

Am off for a bath and glass of wine, will pop in again later.

cep its only 2.20pm here, appointment is at 5,30pm.

thanks for the explanation of decidual bleeding by the way, of course I tested on day 2 just to be sure (BFN)

I dont know what to suggest about your SWI days/bleeding, because its unclear where you are in your cycle. I think until you have charted for a big longer its impossible to say whats really going on (in which case scattergun approach is best) Did your temps drop with this bit of bleeding? Can you post your chart again?

xxxxxxxxxxx

Ooh cep a glass of wine...

Thanks mummya and nix I shall indeed be poas twice a day! Planning on a 2 o'clock sneak one when I'm back at work and maybe a 5 o'clock one?

Thanks for your kind words mummya particularly when I can see what you are going through. Good luck today. Enjoy your evening Cep hope things clear up for you soon.

I am cheering myself up with chocolate and repeating " I am normal, I am normal" thanks for making me chuckle.

xx