TTC after a miscarriage - Ready to try again, we can do it this time!!!

[Diddle]

Well I think after all our chatting its about time we had a new thread, as the previous one was very lucky for us, lets hope this one remains just as lucky.

Remember ladies - Our time will come, but our bodies have to be ready, and we are all here to support each other.

For those new people please feel free to check out our Stats thread, to see some info about us and leave you details if you want to.

GOOD LUCK!!!!

Also I've always had very unusual periods. That was mainly why I was taking the pill in the first place. Since I had my m/c (operation needed) they've been even worse.

Now I dont know whether I should come off the pill now to let it all settle down before trying but I have no other way of protecting esp seeing as I dont really want to be pregnant over xmas as the worrying will ruin xmas for me.

Mumswish - I would come off the pill to let your body adjust, but only if you want to be pregnant pretty soon, or if you would rather wait maybe stop it at the beginning of december, or january. there is not guarantee that it won't clear your system before 3 months. could you not have sex, or try to avoid it mid-cycle.

ok so If (boyfs logic) want baby to be born around end of august that means I should be thinking about being pregnant around Nov which means I should be coming off my pills after this round yeh? (2 more weeks of pills to go)

Dont know when my mid-cycle is as never had regular periods. To the point of bleeding for 3 weeks one month and only 2 days the next. With a space of 2 weeks between them. Its soooo confusing this pg lark. Was meant to be easy.

be back soon, as off for lunch and only have net access at work.

Welcome Mumswish!
Sorry to hear of your loss. Nice of you to join us though. Have you put your details on our stats thread?
Any abbreviations your're not sure with either check out the acronyms list at the top of the page or just ask.
No idea where I am cycle wise (varies constantly).
Brief abbreviations are:
Dh/dp= darling husband/partner.
dd/ds= darling daughter/son.
bfp/bfn= big fat positive/negative.(for pg tests).
pg=pregnant
mc=miscarriage.
ov=ovulating/ovulation.
cm= cervical mucus (lovely! )
Can't think of many others but any questions, ask away!

Pill wise I'd go ahead and stop now. I came off 1st Jan and fell pg 12th Feb. But as Diddle says, it normally takes around 3 months or so to clear out of your body.

Off to get bits and pieces done all. Be back later xx

mumswish- yeah it is nov beginning of dec time for due date at end of august, i know as my dd was due on 25th august and born on 31st august and i was due to be born on 25th august too and was born yep youve guessed it 31st august so my dd and i share our birthdays which is great- as her 18th will be my 40th cool eh!

although if your boyf want baby to be oldest in school you need to make sur baby is born after 31st august as this is cut of date and dd is youngest in class- although its not that bad as you dont have to wait an extra year for them to start school.

mumswish - you need to watch be prepared for the fact that if you don't get pg straight away that you're child may miss the cut off and not go to school when you hope them to.

AF = Aunty Flo/period

Just been having a look at the stats thread.

Slinkie - Notice you are a student. What you studying??

Babybloos - Your MC was same time as mine. Mine was 9th August. I already have 3 boys and it was my first MC too.

Mumswish - Your not too young to start wanting a family. If you feel ready then whynot! I was 21 when I decided I wanted a family. It took me 3 years and clomid treatment to fall with my first though so was 24 by the time he came along!

mumswish - i agree with coathanger you're not too young. Lottielou who is on here with us too is only 22 and she has had one miscarriage and poss another one recently although unconfirmed.
I'm 25 and started when i was just 24, as long as you feel ready then there is not right or wrong time.

hi coathanger i am studying multimedia computing i am suppose to be going into my 3rd year this week but have decided to take a year out as my stillborn baby was born 3 weeks before i finished my second year so have assignments still to resit and also i don't know whether i am up to hectic 3rd year.
although i am still wondering whether i am doing the right thing, if i get pregnant straight away then that is great as then not being at uni is a good idea.

mumswish- i was only 19 when i fell pg with ds, was not planned but wouldn't change anything.

Slinkie - that sounds like a very posh course!! You must do what you think is right in regards to your course and falling PG. People can ive you advice but at the end of the day it is your choice. xx

Diddle - how do you feel today, hun?

Have just invited another lady over from another thread i hope you don't mind

I know you don't

coathanger - hmmm don't knwo fi we can let anyone else come on here now haha as if thatw ould happen, come on the more the merrier!!!

I know nobody minds but, well, you know what I'm like Diddle, always apologising and being defensive Didn't want to take it on myself to invite folks along! She seems really nice and will love this thread, as we all do

Where you all gone????

Thanks for all the messages guys. I dont really care when baby born I wanted to b pg 2 months after mc. Which I think is a need everyone has and it really doesnt dissapear so Coathanger I really feel for you. My boyf asked me to wait and I waited this long in bouts of tears worrying about when/if it was going to happen again. I'm so chuffed now tho. and I'm not even pg yet.

Is it harder to become pg after mc? Its just after reading these posts it seems as tho everyone is having such a hard time. It makes me think I'll have trouble which is something I really wasnt thinking about. I just assumed that if it happened once it would happen again. I was more worried about whether I could make it stay than whether I could get pg in the first place.

I remember the whole thing at the hospital was "its very normal to have a mc with your first pg" why didnt anyone prepare me for that? I just assumed u only had a mc if you did strenious stuff.

My bestmate is heavily pg, due today and has been in labour (Slow labour) for 3 wks on and off is this normal? I'm not 2 sure how I feel about it at the moment as it bugs the hell out of me when you c all these women with kids who smoke, drugs etc when I couldnt keep mine. My best mate has polysistic ovaries (sp?) and she got pregnant one night when the condom snapped (she was on the pill and took the morning after pill) and she still got caught. And kept it. Why cant it be the same for me?

I'm sorry to ramble and about such mundane things aswel.
Thanks for all advice gals.

was also wondering does being overweight play a factor as 2 whether a mc will happen? I'm well overweight (doc told me)

I think the same as you. I still see these very young mums, with their babies surrounded by the mums school friends smoking, swearing , being generally unwholesome, and I think "why then and not me?". I saw a PG woman smoking just a coupl eof days ago and I found it a real strain not to go over to her and say something. It is very hard. But I just tell myself over and over that it was out of my control, I did everything in my power to make sure my baby was happy and healthy, but it just wasn't to be. I used to get very upset when people said "there was obviously something wrong with it" or "it wasn't meant to be" even though I knew these people meant no harm by saying htat. But now, I can kind of see that there is some truth in that. You did everything you could, Mumswish, to make sure your baby was doing well. It was nothing you did that made the difference.

Being overweight might make it harder to conceive but not impossible, there are lots of larger mums out there. I'm not exactly skinny (although i must say this cold is working wonders for the diet ) and I fell no problem with my last 2. As long as you are healthy, eat well, and look after yourself, thats what counts.

Your time will come, Mumswish. As it will for everyone, even me!! I'm hoping DH will see how much this means to me and agree to TTC again. But in the meantime I'm here to give everyone a bit of moral support, and, when I'm feeling up to it again (bloody cold), a bit of a laugh.

Being overweight shouldn't make you MC, should it? I've never heard that before.

I'm 5ft4 and 14st. I went to docs to ask advice about what to do this time. (different docs from mc as I@ve moved since) and she said "first of all you need to lose weight you're too fat to have a baby" exact words.

I'm really scared that this is true (although she could have put it nicer) we eat heathily, just not one with the excersise thats all, hence the weight.

I think it was very mean of the doctor to put it like that - what ever happened to being sympathetic?

If you eat a healthy balanced diet (and yes, that does include chocolate!), you don't smoke or drink heavily, then I see no reason for you not conceiving. Obviously, in an ideal world, it would be better for you to be a skinny 9 stone, but this isn't an ideal world! There are more important things to worry about, like the smoking and drinking. And exercise doesn't mean running and aerobics necessarily. Walking is said to be the best form of exercise - and its free! Or try swimming.

You have to get things into perspective - yes it would be great if you were nearer your ideal weight and got a bit of exercise, but lots and lots of women who smoke heavily, drink like fish, are grossly overweight, fall PG everyday! Most of which didn't mean to fall PG!

mumswish - that's an awful thing for your doctor to say - you can complain. Do you know who runs your surgery. Being overweight has nothing to do with your ability to fall pg or to carry the baby to term. I mc at 8 weeks - I did nothing strenuous (other than chase round after my 2yr old ds). My doctor told me (very gently) that it is probably natures way of dealing with an embryo. Another very good gp friend of mine told me that it is infact very common. She works in a women's clinic and sees a lot of women in our position. She also had a miscarriage, has had IVF (twins!) and has recently fall pg naturally and very unexpectedly. I hope this gives you some hope. My advice would be to come off the pill, try not to get too bogged down in planning brith dates, and get bd-ing.

HC - I tested today - saw a really,really,really,really faint line. Got dp to look and he said he could see it too. Trying not to get too excited.

wowowo congrats a faint line is a line its a big fat positive!!!