Anyone who doesn't do the elf thing, what do you tell your kids?

[YouLookLikeStevieNicks]

DD is only 2 so I don't really need to worry about this just yet.

But a friend said to me today "ooh she will be old enough for an elf next year" and it hit me that I really don't want to do it. I can't even explain why, I love christmas and I want to make it as magical as possible for her, but I really don't want a bloody elf!

Is it a really big deal these days? Will she be the only one in school without one?

My kids have never mentioned it but we don’t do Santa either so it might be that

We just say we don’t believe in it. Our kids are well aware that it’s just something that some parents choose to do but not to ruin it for their friends (they are 5 and 7).

Mine never had an elf. It never occurred to them to ask. If you do it you’re tied in for years - don’t do it!!

DS is 6. We’ve never bothered and he’s never asked about it. No idea if any of his friends do it.

Christ no. Don’t get started with that shit

Just tell your kids you have your own arrangement with father Xmas so you don’t need an elf to spy on you

Never mentioned it and they never asked!

That I don’t like it

When mine asked I told her I thought they were weird and I didn't want them in our house. She was quite happy with that and I have never regretted the decision. Creepy little fuckers.

I’ve also never done it, 4 children all primary aged and below. It has been mentioned a couple of times, and I just say we don’t do it. I think once or twice I said that they were well behaved enough not to need an elf keeping an eye on them for Santa.

the older ones have now passed the message on to the younger ones 🤣

I felt the same. Mine didn't ask for a while. Then when DD1 got to about 7 she did, and kept asking from around mid November, when her friends were starting to talk about. I said 'some families have them, and some don't.' She was genuinely really sad. So as much as I'm not a huge fan, I thought sod it and we have one now. She doesn't do anything naughty (we have a good elf!) and it brings the DC so much joy.

Long story short - I'd only bother at the point when she wants it more than you don't want it, if that makes sense!

My kids asked once, and i said only the really naughty children get an elf as they need to be watched to see if Santa wants them on the nice list.

My then 6yo piped up that it was indeed the naughtiest kid in class who said they had an elf, they reinforcing my excuse..

They never asked again!

I told DS it was a recent invention and not a tradition our family would be creating. 🤷‍♀️ I’m not playing along with that shit. It’s all for social media clout as far as I can see.

I do love Christmas though! Just not the unbridled consumerist/ clout chasing bits!

I do the elf and I told my kids that I have to let father Christmas know that we want the elf and he decides if he sends one
That way anyone else in her class she hopefully doesn't go on about the elf to

I wouldn't start going on about not believing it unless you want her to consider father Christmas not being real either

“No, we don’t have an elf. It’s not real”

My kids think it's the really naughty kids who need to be kept an eye on that have elves so they are delighted we don't have one.

I haven't discouraged that train of thought.

I say I don’t want a naughty elf living in my house. I absolutely point blank refuse to do elf on the fucking shelf. It has nothing to do with do with the meaning of Christmas and is pure unadulterated late stage cheap shite capitalism. I hate seeing and listening to people doing their ‘simple’ and ‘hilarious’ elf pranks as if this isn’t an absolute waste of everyone’s time, energy and effort. Someone will trot out that they say the elf is in quarantine or has broke its leg or something for most of advent - in which case why bother doing it at all! Argh. I’m hoping it’s run its course as a fad tbh for all our sakes.

We did similar and the kids weren't too bothered about not having one. Luckily for them, as we were never getting one!

DD is nearly 6. She's asked half heartedly a couple of times. I told her we don't let the fair folk into the house 😁

Why would not believing in the elf- which is available to buy in every other shop- mean not believing in Father Christmas?

No flipping elf in this house. My dc asked once and I'd never heard of if. Now much later I realise it is a thing. But no. No elf.

i told mine that she didn’t need an elf as she was well behaved and so Santa didn’t need any elves to spy on her.

she did have a cuddly elf toy and one year I did move that about once a week so she could join in the stories in class as she upset to be left out. Luckily she’s my youngest and 10 and it only really became a thing in the last few years so I’ve pretty much escaped it. She obviously knows they’re not real now.

i think they’re freaky and weird looking and I don’t like the concept of them being naughty while spying on kids for their behaviour.

I wasn’t planning on doing the elf till she started school and was 4.5 and dec 1 said after having one at school and all friends had one that am - why didn’t I have one mummy 😢😢😢😢

we actually brought an elf when she was a baby by sheer fluke so I said well go and have a wee and then I have to tell you something

dashes to hide elf on top of sofa

guess what - I came home from town and found one

but she’s a hiding elf. She doesn’t do tricks /not a naughty elf

she was so thrilled and so it began

yes peer pressure but God sake don’t do it at 2 !!

and all Nov been talking about how hers will come tomorrow bless her

I caved to the pressure when my eldest was in Year 1 and she asked why we didn't have one. We're still going 7 years later and I wish I'd never started it; the kids do love it though!

Can I just say add, there are no rules and has never been any mention of our elf being a spy. I've only ever heard that said on here.

Don't get one.

My kids saw it in the shops "oh those elves aren't even real magic look mum".

They sell them in shops. The kids can see they’re not real. It’s very different to Father Christmas