Anyone who doesn't do the elf thing, what do you tell your kids?

[YouLookLikeStevieNicks]

DD is only 2 so I don't really need to worry about this just yet.

But a friend said to me today "ooh she will be old enough for an elf next year" and it hit me that I really don't want to do it. I can't even explain why, I love christmas and I want to make it as magical as possible for her, but I really don't want a bloody elf!

Is it a really big deal these days? Will she be the only one in school without one?

Same as ours

they are little for so short time that talking maybe 5/6yrs if start it at 4/5yr when start school so happy to do a small thing that takes 30 seconds a day to give fun and pleasure to mini blondes

I have been asked a few times by kids and I usually just say no. If pressed I go with Mummy is too busy to deal with any more chaos in the run up to Christmas and they are super creepy. I don’t want to spoil what anyone else is doing but I feel like doing all the possible Christmas things just becomes way too much so it’s fine to skip some.

I will point out to those who say all of this is for social media. I do elf on the shelf (but don’t put it online) and barely see any of it on my FB and Instagram. If it’s all over your feeds then that’s because of what you’ve been watching/ searching. It isn’t on my algorithm.

We never did it and the DC didn't ask.

Very glad we didn't. Father Christmas, the tooth fairy and the Easter Bunny was definitely enough. No need add extra stress to an already busy month by having to come up with something new every single bloody day (unless you genuinely enjoy this kind of thing!)

Oh, and we do also have the Christmas Elves. They sometimes come on Christmas Eve, ring the bell but there's no one at the door except a basket with Christmas PJs, hot chocolate for the DC and some nice booze for the grown ups.

But that's really simple, and it's a nice way to signal it's bedtime on Christmas Eve, basically.

I have never done it. I’m glad. My son has ASD, he likes social rules to be clear cut. The idea of an elf who was incredibly naughty, spying on him so he could report back to Santa on whether DS was naughty or nice, would confuse the fuck out of him.

DS is 11 and has never once asked why we don’t have an elf.

The elf is a freaky little plastic voyeur and we will not be having one in our home. He’s the epitome of plastic tat. Luckily my children never wanted one of the little perverts.

Never did it.
They are in the shops all over the place and when DC first saw them I said some people do things with the elf for fun (but usually a bit naughty - like tipping out a bin, or cutting up paper), but we won't be doing that.

We don’t do it. We’ve not invited the elves. Just as a few of our friends haven’t invited Father Christmas (for a variety of reasons, including different faiths and avoidance of consumerism). You have to invite them, it would be weird if people (magical or otherwise) came into your house uninvited. Don’t you think?

We don’t do an elf on the shelf type elf. We talk vaguely about ‘the elves‘ who do nice stuff like bring the advent calendar. It’s a refillable one so ‘they’ put a little treat in each night for her to find in the morning. Sometimes if something nice happens (I pick her up a treat at the bakery or set up a craft thing or something) I might credit ‘the elves’ but not every day and no expectations.

When she talks about the elf at school or that her cousins/ friends have I just say well your elves bring you your calendar and fill it up each night and she’s happy with that. We just talk about different things happen in different houses. She’s come to the conclusion that elves visit every house where there’s children but they do different things and ours are invisible and she’s happy with that.

Last year after a lot of overthinking, and despite knowing I never really wanted to get into it, I decided to try hiding a little elf toy we already had (it’s like a mini teddy not the elf on the shelf type) for her to find and she did, but later that day asked me if elf could go away now as it was making her scared. So that’s kind of confirmed it for me not to do it - I had to tell her it had been me moving her and I was just playing a game, but we still had to put the elf away after that!

If she ever asks, tell her it’s a behaviour tool that she doesn’t need because she’s generally well behaved.

I do the elf but no one else I know irl does. It’s really not as popular as social media makes out

I tell my kids I don’t need any more cheeky in my house than I’ve already got 😂 I do hide a little sylvanian mouse around the house, but she doesn’t do anything and she’s certainly not spying! Santa doesn’t need spies, he’s magic ✨ 😂

I can believe it. DS has told me he’s “90% sure you’re actually a real magical witch”.

(I’m a bit “woo” by nature, wear a lot of black, and crucially, can read him like a book- which looks a bit spooky if you’re 9 and thought you were being stealthy when you raided the biscuit tin 😅)

I told mine it was a made up thing from America and that I worked full time and was too busy to do it. A grandparent gave them one but I just ignored it. I just did not have capacity for anything extra.

You might not have to say anything.

But if questioned "Not every house has an Elf. I think I'm glad we don't, apparently they can be naughty."

And then change the subject to something nice about Christmas or Santa or their feet or whatever.

I work with wee ones. Vast majority don't do Elf and don't question why some do. They don't really care.

I dont do it because I did it once and they were absolutely terrified of the prospect. So I told them it wasnt true and never did it again. I just say it’s a fun story and some people believe and that’s ok. Luckily they havent said much else.

I also love this as a response (image may take a while to load though).

Majority of my friends do it with their kids. I’d say it’s a 60/40 split on ones that regret ever starting it and ones that enjoy it. If you like it then it’s awesome. If it will stress you out just don’t do it. It’s not worth it.

😂 I like this.

We have two cheeky elves, they don’t spy on my Dd or report naughty behaviour or anything awful like that and no one I know does that. I also don’t post on social media, but don’t see anything wrong with that. It’s a bit of fun and Dd adores it. Our elves do silly things or sometimes bring a little note or small craft/activity idea or just hide if I really cba. It’s true, it’s a bit of a ball ache at times, but she really loves it, so it’s worth it. Have never done Christmas eve boxes etc, everything else fairly low key

We have an elf but we don't plan to do the whole prank moving him palaver. DS is 3. He'll probably just perch somewhere as a decoration - perhaps we'll occasionly move him.

This year is the official end of elf ! 2 dc 15 and 10 ( 15 yr old has been aware for some time and helps out with ideas for elf pranks) but as of tomorrow they will wake up to the elves that have been the Bain of my life every year for far too long. With a card explaining they can now keep them as dolls as there magic has been passed on to littler ones this year and they will leave them each an advent calendar some sweets and a voucher . It will be worth every penny to get rid of the little shits. 😂
All my own fault . It’s been lovely and fun but also been a massive chore at times .

We have some and they just play with them

Mine died of COVID.

I really dislike the idea of them spying and doing things at night.

Omg lol