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Original poster

To make dreams come true regardless of price?

109 replies

workstealssleep · 07/12/2024 18:41

I am not sure what to do.
Ds is in his last year of believing. He wants a particular toy for Christmas.
Dh says it is silly money to spend on a soft toy, and is right.
But I do love that moment when they get what they asked for...
I know there is not one right answer. Different things work for different families.
But if he doesn't get his one most wanted gift, how do I frame that on Christmas Day? I'm sure other people have been here before.

OP posts:
DarkDarkNight · 07/12/2024 20:13

Buy it. It’s Christmas, get him the one he wants. I wish there was something my son desperately wanted, I feel he’s going to be massively disappointed.

Bournetilly · 07/12/2024 20:13

I’d buy it. If you can’t afford it I would return the £30 one and get the one he’s asked for (even though I’m sure he would love that one too).

Tinaforshort · 07/12/2024 20:16

workstealssleep · 07/12/2024 19:30

Yes it is a Jellycat. I have actually bought him a different one for £30 which I know ĥe will like. He loves them all. But top of his list is this particular one. I might just tell him they are not available (the one he wants is out of stock, but there is a similar one for the same price, and I think he'd be just as impressed with that, just hasn't come across it before).

Edited

Personally I would return the £30 one and buy the one he has on top of his list, it’s then not an extra as such.

I remember growing up the disappointment of not actually getting what I wanted but something similar that my mum thought was better for me - and it wasn’t even expensive stuff.

A Christmas list to me is not a list of demands but for me it’s the one they would like or not at all.

Hayley1256 · 07/12/2024 20:19

If you can afford it then I'd buy it

DurhamDurham · 07/12/2024 20:20

I think longer term a better life lesson is that you don't always get what you want and you have to live within your means

Is Christmas Day the right day to start getting that life lesson underway? The last year her son is likely to believe in Father Christmas? He's asking for a £50 toy not a Ferrari and Op has already said she can afford it.

I'd return the one he hasn't asked for and spend the cash on the one her actually wants.

GameOfJones · 07/12/2024 20:26

Buy him the one that he wants. I have spent money before on presents I wouldn't choose but that's the point, it is their choice.

I would much rather spend the majority of the money on a present that DC really wanted and then just get a few other little bits to fill their stocking than to spend the same money on lots of random stuff.

NImumconfused · 07/12/2024 20:29

I think if it's within the budget you'd normally spend, I'd get him the one he really wants. Jellycat are stupidly expensive, but kids live them and it's his opportunity to have something he really wants that he likely knows is too expensive to ask for any other time of year.

EmberAsh · 07/12/2024 20:30

Would you be happy saying which soft toy it is? People on these threads can be quite good at finding items that are out of stock hidden away on a shelf somewhere.

Dearover · 07/12/2024 20:31

Itching to know now which one it is. I hunted down one of their Christmas decs earlier and felt very pleased with myself.

DancefloorAcrobatics · 07/12/2024 20:32

My DC always wrote a list for Santa and he then picked one or two items off that list ....

Not sure what you tell your DC so you might be stuck and have to buy it!

Fluffycloudsfloatinginthesky · 07/12/2024 20:40

I would return the £30 one and get the one he wants.

I have not spent quite £50 on one but have got a couple in the £30-£40 range. My daughter is getting the bagel for Xmas from her gf - that was £30 which I thought was quite a lot for that size....

user2848502016 · 07/12/2024 20:43

workstealssleep · 07/12/2024 19:05

We can afford it. But he is one of three, so I feel that setting limits is sensible, no matter what our finances. I don't want them all to expect an endless budget.
Of course it is not a soft toy for £500! I would never waste money like that. It is over £50, which is mad to me. We always think carefully about our purchases.

Just buy it then, they're not children forever

ChanelBoucle · 07/12/2024 20:45

Oh do it. They’re only young for such a short time. I wish my two still wanted cuddly toys 🥰

LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood · 07/12/2024 20:46

Get him the exact one he wants.

He will always remember that moment of opening it.

If it is out of stock on the Jellycat website then it is still likely available elsewhere. Honestly I struggle to understand parents who can afford to get something (under £100 or so) for Christmas that their child really really desires but choose not to.

All my 3 have memories of Christmas mornings when they got the exact thing their heart desired. And in terms of soft toys they all (now aged 23, 20 and 13) still have the ones they particularly asked for.

I am plainly only saying this as you have said OP that you can afford it.

verycloakanddaggers · 07/12/2024 20:46

I think £50 on the one he actually wants is far better than £30 on a different one.

Caffeineneedednow · 07/12/2024 20:49

We also have 3 and set a budget for each of them. If this is what he wants it becomes his " main" present and his other ones would be less expensive to reflect the cost of this one.

BeerForMyHorses · 07/12/2024 20:49

Return the £30 and get him the one he wants. For an extra £20 it's not worth the potential disappointment.

Potatosaladsalsa · 07/12/2024 20:54

Growing up, I know for certain my mother would have got it! She would have done it, simply because I was just a kid. On my last year of believing, she spent out on a trip to Lapland to meet Santa. She and my dad swore it was the trip of a lifetime and that it was the most amazing experience, so it was worth it.
I’m now in my 20s and my partner (who knows I love Jellycat and doesn’t mind that I do) sent a jellycat over for my mum to buy me for Xmas - I know she would have thought the price was daft, but it was in budget and she got it (I’ve pieced this together - partner and I are done with shopping, but the same evening I told him how much I wanted a certain Jellycat my mum messaged me about a surprise partner had arranged lol).
anyway, it’s not about the value of the gift so to speak. If you can afford it go for it. You could get a pair of £70 boots, which he doesn’t want, or a £70 Teddy he really wants.

Unsurewhattowear · 07/12/2024 20:59

Which Jellycat is it? Primark have their own version of some Jellycats for about £7.00 I got my son the penguin one

To make dreams come true regardless of price?
Original poster
workstealssleep · 07/12/2024 21:12

Useful opinions, thanks. The siblings will not compare who got what, they will just be excited to be spilt for the day.
It is a 50cm dragon. I could get him a different colour 50cm dragon, or keep the totally different dragon I have for now.

OP posts:
LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood · 07/12/2024 21:17

The 50cm dragon is the most wonderful toy. I got him for DS (then aged 11) when he needed to have major surgery. He is the perfect size for cuddling. DS is now 13 and says his dragon will be his friend forever. His is the black one. The bigger ones definitely have the edge in terms of cuddliness.

Billybobranaway · 07/12/2024 21:18

I have 4 DC and we have never had a strict budget. Children very rarely care what gifts others have. Even now mine are older they are just happy they have the gift they wanted.
Also if money is not an issue please do not buy cheaper versions (obvious is you are unable to afford the original that is different). I was always that child who never got the thing they wanted but the cheaper "dupe" version. My parents could afford the original they just did not like spending money. It is something I always remember and it bugs me still. In my experience children would rather get less gifts and get the things they actually want.

fishfingersandchipsagain · 07/12/2024 21:21

workstealssleep · 07/12/2024 21:12

Useful opinions, thanks. The siblings will not compare who got what, they will just be excited to be spilt for the day.
It is a 50cm dragon. I could get him a different colour 50cm dragon, or keep the totally different dragon I have for now.

I’ll bet if you posted the one he wants, someone would be able to find it.

TheBeesKnee · 07/12/2024 21:22

workstealssleep · 07/12/2024 21:12

Useful opinions, thanks. The siblings will not compare who got what, they will just be excited to be spilt for the day.
It is a 50cm dragon. I could get him a different colour 50cm dragon, or keep the totally different dragon I have for now.

Awhh I would probably get him the exact one he wanted. I still remember asking for Barbie and getting some kind of corner shop knock off 😂

Is there anything you can return if you're trying to save money? I think he'd rather have his special dragon than a different toy and some random trainers etc.

SlightlyJaded · 07/12/2024 21:26

Agree that you should return the one you have and put it towards the one he wants. It's a sweet thing to want and he will be made up to get the exact one he is dreaming of.

Not quite the same thing, but my DH came from a very poor family. He never got quite what he wanted. No Chopper bike, Branded trainers, Bionic Man toy, Atari etc - it was always a market version that his mum could afford. When he was 21 she saved like a bloody maniac to buy him the 'exact version' of what he was dreaming of and he is 51 now and that gift still makes him happy - as does the fact that his lovely mum made such an effort to get it right.

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