How do you approach gift buying for adults?

[thebrowncurlycrown]

Every year I ask what the adults in my life want, and every year they'll say "nothing". I wish I was one of those thoughtful people who bought the loveliest gift they didn't know they wanted or needed and doesn't get thrown to the back of the cupboard forgotten, but alas here I am !

Kids are easy to buy for. They are not afraid to tell you what they want. Otherwise I like the "something they want / need / wear / read" approach.

Is there anything similar you use for adults? I just wonder if people have a simple way of thinking about gift buying for adults so I don't get this headache every year.

When I say nothing I mean just that, maybe they do. There's no need to buy presents for the sake of it. 😬

If they say nothing then get them nothing except a chocolate Santa.
You asked - they answered!
(unlike me who has a permanent wish list of dozens of things I would be happy to get as a gift.....)

Best gift: an agreement to stop buying presents for each other.

Second choice is to find somewhere where your interests/taste overlap. E.g. if you're a coach potato and your friend's a cyclist, don't buy them bike stuff because you'll probably get it wrong. But, maybe you both love vintage jewellery or murder mystery books, buy those instead. It's so much easier to buy stuff that you like and know about.

I get what you mean but with my lot nothing does mean "I want something but I'm too lazy to think of ideas at this moment in time"

Stop trying to be a mind reader. When they say nothing get them nothing.
If they are to lazy to decide to give you an idea why are you thinking for them?
If they complain say you said nothing if you wanted something you should have said.

Well to use a very hated phrase on mumsnet they need to use their words. I can accept someone saying I don’t know, but nothing well then I will accept that you mean that you being an adult and all.

So buy them a voucher for somewhere very generic like Amazon, M&S or Just Eat. I'm sure they can manage to spend that in however many years before it expires. Tape it to some chocolate if you feel they must have 'something to open'.

I'd happily be given nothing. If I have to tell people what to buy, it's not a gift, it's just another chore for me so someone else can pat themselves on the back about how generous they've been.

And I don't want other people choosing anything I have to use, wear or look at so wouldn't appreciate anything like that.

I'd happily receive fizzy wine, gin as long as it's not pink and certain kinds of chocolate or biscuits but apart from that, I'm quite happy with nothing

“If there really is nothing you want, shall we skip Christmas presents this year? Or I can just get you your favourite chocolate/gin?”
Or if the adults are your (young-ish) adult kids, maybe give them cash?
For us, one side of the family has largely stopped doing adult presents by mutual agreement; the other side usually gets each other tickets/experiences or consumables.

I make my DC a hamper of nice things they can never afford to treat themselves to. Nice coffee, posh biscuits etc and I throw in a gift card for a nice meal out, and for the supermarket, which will cover a shop.

I also still do Stockings (including for their partners) with items to pamper themselves, face masks, pretty Tissues and chocolates etc

My eldest is 33 🫣🤭

**edited to add - one year, I made a friend a "babysitting voucher" as she's a single parent. There was no limit to how many times she could ask me to babysit

what's your budget and interests for each person @thebrowncurlycrown

I'm sure MN will come up trumps for you 😊

I've pretty much given up buying for my parents although they're pretty bad for not buying things they actually need because it's too much effort to use google and they refuse to use Amazon so I often buy them things they need at other times of year and say it's for your birthday / Christmas. They're fairly easy to buy books for as they both read daily and i've done theatre tickets in the past.
My brother and SIL are easily pleased with a bottle of spirits, PJs, socks, that kind of thing.

I have the “nothing” lot too but what they mean is that they expect you to be creative and mind read what they want which will be beyond a reasonable budget and will look down on you if you don’t live up to it. I got fed up with this so I now donate to charity or similar, you can donate toilets, school equipment, goats, lifeboat kit, all sorts of things. You usually get something to wrap up for the recipient. Then if they are unhappy with it they look like ungrateful selfish idiots!

We don’t buy for adults anymore. Our grown up DCs we give them cash or voucher and a stocking with their favourite sweet treats, toiletries etc. We don’t buy gifts for siblings, nieces or nephews anymore as they’re all grown ups though if they host a party we always take nice wine, Christmas chocolate, M&S fancy tins that kind of thing. DH and I get a few treats for each other but we would rather book a holiday than spend cash on gifts for each other just for the sake of it.

The only adults I buy for is my DC and hubby sorts out pil. I have best friends and we agreed not to buy for each other etc but what we do is treat each other to different things during the year such as one gets tickets for something I pay the meal and vice versa. I'm at that point where I dont want clutter and friends are the same 😂 now I've a teenager I'm glad the days of " stuff " isn't cluttering up the house. But we get things we know will be used and not just sit gathering dust.

Consumables. I buy my brother and brother in law a box of steaks each from Donald Russell. Mil and fil get smoked salmon and nice biscuits. Gin for my cousin. My sister gives me a list or gets a voucher. Sil gets a hamper of cheese or chocolate.

Buy the same thing every year for Christmas pretty much. Sometimes do restaurant vouchers.

Totally agree with consumables. If they drink alcohol, then a bottle of decent wine/ a variation on their favourite spirit or liqueur.

I know there are mixed views on hampers on MN but they have their place - artisan biscuits/ crackers/ good quality jams/chutneys/confectionary. People on here will say 'I wouldn't want that' but assume you know the tastes of the people you are buying for.

A plant for a garden if they have one or a house plant in a pot.

These are all things I would appreciate, don't want things I don't want or need.

I agree with the posters above, when I say I want nothing I mean it. If you're unsure, you can't go wrong with edibles, so posh chocolate or tea/coffee gift set could be a great option. If these are distant relatives that you won't be seeing this year, make a merry christmas slideshow to email and call it a day.

I would happily be given nothing too. And brought this up one Xmas a few years ago. They all looked aghast at the suggestion. But I like your suggestion of a gift voucher.

I would buy a generic supermarket/ Amazon / Costa coffee voucher and wrap it with a selection box .

£50-100 per adult couple, for singles £50-75. Interests are varied!

DH and I have proposed no presents year on year and it's (mainly the ILs and their extended) who turn their nose at the idea! Only my parents, brothers and SIL are happy to go no presents

This is exactly it! They say nothing but will pout on the day if they get nothing! I love this suggestion thank you.

Adults in my family all do a secret santa. Works well. We do the draw online and the site we use also has a wish list function.

I hate the idea that you are responsible for coming up with ideas for what you want - it's not lazy not to want to come to with ideas, it's for the gift giver to do that

It's an opportunity to think about the person and what they like and use. But if you want generic ideas:

Consumables you know they like - wine, gin, whiskey, or chocolates. Or wool if they knit

A subscription to something they like - get a book a month from a book subscription, that diet of thing

A photo gift - a key ring with a family photo, or a mug, or a framed photo

Luxury versions of things everyone needs - e.g. Really nice socks.

If you really want to outsource the thinking - this company has good reviews.

themysterygiftbox.com/product/gender-neutral-mystery-gift-box/

@Pistolpunk sorry I didn't mean to quote you!