Poncetastic Christmas 2024

[StiffyByngsDogBartholomew]

@vivajen hasn't posted on MN for a year so I've taken the bull by the horns. I can't wait any longer !
Wherever you are, Fellatio, here's to you. I hope you're brining a turkey and had crafting authentic organic woven tinsel somewhere.
"OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom.
So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobs worth ponce, join me on this thread.
Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapés and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.
Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessie’s' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

🎄🎄🎄🎄

Do you mean the recipe says an 11 inch square cake tin? An 11 cm square tin doesn't seem right (as in its really tiny) It's likely to be 11 inches/ 28 (ish) cm.

I have a cake conversion chart in my good Housekeeping book which I can try and look out for you later, or you could Google a cake conversion chart.

Sorry can't be of much more help, the cm / inches thing has thrown me.

Just to add that I'd probably just try and get a round cake and a loaf cake out of the mixture personally. It sounds like it would roughly work out (although at varying depths)

Edited to add: you could also post the recipe / page here for us to look at

@PumpkinSpicedTea i am happy to work out the volumes of your various tins and give you ratios to use, put please could you do measurements in all cm or all inches so I don’t make a mess of it!

My standard size loaf tin is about 2/3 the volume of my 20cm round cake tin and so it’s easy to convert amounts , but cooking time is by skewer test

@RainbowZebraWarrior and @LemonTurdCart thanks for your replies and apologies for the confusion, as I'm confused myself.

I'm wanting a small cake so googled it and Nigel Slater came up on a Webpage on the Guardian.

A small, rich fruitcake
This quantity will make a deep 11cm square cake or 2 small loaf tins 13cm x 6cm. (I hope you don't mind if I mention that cake tins are traditionally measured across the base.)
450g dried fruits
3 tbsp brandy
the grated zest and juice of a small orange
125g butter
70g light muscovado sugar
55g dark muscovado sugar
2 large eggs
70g hazelnuts
40g ground almonds
125g plain flour
½ tsp baking powder
a knife point of ground cinnamon
a knife point of ground nutmeg
the merest pinch of allspice
brandy for feeding the cake

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2008/dec/07/baking-dessert

First of all when he's saying a deep 11cm square tin, how deep do you think he means? I'm digging out more tins in the back of my cupboard as I type 😂 I'll then go back and measure.

@PumpkinSpicedTea
you said
“I've got a 22cm round tin that's 6 inches deep, a smaller one that's 13cm and 3 inches deep”
so I just wanted to check correct before I get the calculator out, not 6cm & 3cm deep !

@PumpkinSpicedTea the attached photo shows the metric measurements for the recipe that I use. It has different amounts for different sized tins.

Argh sorry 🤦🏻‍♀️ don't know what I've done there.

Hopefully these make sense: I am so bad at measuring in case you didn't realise.

Round tins :

23cm x 6.3 cm (approx.)

19cm x 3.5cm

Rectangle (not square 🤦🏻‍♀️😂)
25cm x 3cm
27cm x 3.5cm
30cm x 4cm

All approx. 🙈

This is good! Thank you.

I guess what I need to know, does deepness matter?

@PumpkinSpicedTea I don't know if this helps - I'm not sure about needing to do maths before I bake 😂. I just fill my tins almost to the top - there's no raising agent in this recipe so they are the same height coming out as they were going in. If you make more mixture than your tin depth then you could bake the extra in a clean bean tin and make mini cakes.

Bake at 140C/275F or gas mark 1 until a skewer comes out clean.

We've just been to Ikea for a wander & I spotted these, but they were oos.

If they happen to come back in stock, pre-Christmas, do you think they'd be ok on a ceiling light fitting? I have two & think they'd be pretty ❄️

@PumpkinSpicedTea

I think Nigel’ssmall pans are about 2/3 the volume of your 19cm pan.

The recipe calls for 450g of fruit, but here is his recipe for a 20cm round tin with 650g fruit, the cake is meant to come out 9cm high

amp.theguardian.com/food/2021/nov/22/nigel-slater-christmas-cake-recipe

So, you could use this recipe with either of your round tins, or scale up the original recipe by about 40%.

Use Nigel’s directions to increase the height of your cake tin using a big strip of baking paper.

@LemonTurdCart thank you so much for taking the time to look into it for me and for finding another recipe as well. So helpful I really appreciate it.

I'm just updating my Christmas planner (seeing as it's November tomorrow), and I will be making Nigel Slater's Orange and Apricot Brandy. I have the ingredients all on the bench ready.

Happened across this on the Waitrose website, and I rather fancy the idea of making individual stuffing 'pannetoni' myself. I've got the poncy brown paper tulip cupcake wraps, so I guess that would work.

Hello. Hope you're all doing OK. Just me again muttering on to myself. Made my Apricot Brandy this morning and I've just watched the Sainsbury's Christmas advert (I won't spoil it)

🎶 It's beginning to look a lot like... too early?

@RainbowZebraWarrior May I have your recipe, please?

It's from Nigel Slater's Christmas Chronicles.

(N.B. I don't add the star anise as I don't like it. I also topped mine up with a shot of Aperol which I figured would work well with its orangey bitterness)

@RainbowZebraWarrior Thank you very much. Apricots will be in season here soon so I can do something then, ready for next year. I have it written out.

Funny you should mention Aperol. DD was just after talking about it at dinner this evening.

The lady on Etsy would sells the reusable cracker pattern sent out a 10% off code, so now I have to make them don't I? 🤣 Off to browse christmas fabric now.

Apricot brandy sounds fab, but I'm more interested in the waitrose stuffing pannetoni... Was that a recipe for it on the website or do waitrose sell it ready made? @RainbowZebraWarrior

I was going to do the apricot brandy with the excuse of apricots leftover from the cake, but Small Child has discovered them so now I need to buy apricots as well as brandy!
I don’t need any more booze in but @RainbowZebraWarrior ’s bottles look so pretty.
Maybe I’ll throw a drinks party for the neighbours. DH will hate it 😁

I read Nigel Slater this morning and briefly thought about making the Apricot drink, but then remembered that I don't really like apricots. I will strain some sloe gin that I've had in the cupboard for ages tomorrow tho...

It's a new Christmas line that they will apparently have instore from 22nd November. I'm just going to wing it (as usual) and make my own variation.

@Christingly I bought the wonder cracker pattern last week but there are 49 steps to making it so I have been put off trying so far! I am really busy this weekend but might try and make a start

Ooh I've just looked at the cracker pattern and am now tempted to order it, I don't think I'll have time to make them before Xmas now.

Yesterday we did stir-up Sunday Friday as DS was here for the day. Now the puddings are steaming away in the slow cooked. DH doesn't think it's going to be hot enough to 'sterilise' them so I might stick them on the hob to steam properly for 30 mins at the end just to be certain. I ended up making on medium, one small (in one of y hand made bowls) and one micro pudding as that's the only combination I could fit in my SC. Will 100% be making mini pudding bassins which will all fit nicely next year.

Don't think I'm going to get much else done for a while now as have to lesson prep for the next 6 weeks 🙃

(*one medium)
Not very exciting photo 😂

The other advantage of doing them in the SC is that I've put it in the veranda which limits the amount of humidity added inside (we're really struggling with it this year, it keeps going above 80% in the sitting room 😳)

@LaChatte You husband doesn’t know what he is talking about. The mini ones probably only need 2 hours. The medium one I would give 6 hours and they will be lovely.