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Christmas

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Original poster

Their list is so expensive!

136 replies

flowerygloves · 27/11/2023 22:28

So - we have exchanged the kid's lists. Ours were encouraged to aim for about £10-20 per gift with say 2 things at £50 ish for grandma and grandad.

One of my siblings has sent a list and EVERYTHING on it is £50 + should I ask for lower cost ideas? Or is £50 what you need to spend nowadays on 13 year olds to get anything decent?

OP posts:
AtrociousCircumstance · 27/11/2023 22:29

Just tell her “hey our budget for the kids is 10 - 20, can you send some more ideas please? Thanks!”

Don't be apologetic, just be clear and open.

sunshineandshowers40 · 27/11/2023 22:31

We spend around £20 but I have 5 nephews/nieces, as they have got older it's gaming vouchers or cash.

Original poster
flowerygloves · 27/11/2023 22:31

sunshineandshowers40 · 27/11/2023 22:31

We spend around £20 but I have 5 nephews/nieces, as they have got older it's gaming vouchers or cash.

I was thinking maybe I should suggest cash/vouchers

OP posts:
Original poster
flowerygloves · 27/11/2023 22:32

AtrociousCircumstance · 27/11/2023 22:29

Just tell her “hey our budget for the kids is 10 - 20, can you send some more ideas please? Thanks!”

Don't be apologetic, just be clear and open.

Ok got it. Thanks. Non apologetic. Also sets the expectation we don't expect them to spend more than that.

OP posts:
ACynicalDad · 27/11/2023 22:33

Either buy them vouchers, give them cash or send a message saying the budget is £x is there anything they'd prefer to a voucher.

ToDoListAddict · 27/11/2023 22:33

Do you have the same number of children?
Just wondering if she's thinking she's buying 3 gifts and you're only getting 1? (For example)

Musiclover234 · 27/11/2023 22:35

I’ve always spent 15-20 on nephews/nieces or friends kids. That’s my budget no matter how old they are. it’s a token not a big gift. That’s for parents!

Pepperama · 27/11/2023 22:53

My DS tends to prefers money as he can pool it. There’s not that much he now likes that is £10-20 and he always struggles coming up with ideas for presents in that price range.

pacora · 27/11/2023 22:57

It's all so tacky isn't it.

Sugarfree23 · 28/11/2023 00:53

I've a nearly 13yo boy who's the same.

It's done my head in trying to come up with budget ideas. Reality is most budget things just no longer exists, video games, films and music are all streamed. Lego is the only toy he wants which is ££.

For lots of kids that age they are in adult sizes for clothes so ££ too.

Options suggest you and another family member split for something off the list or give money for them to save for a later date.

Helenahandkart · 28/11/2023 01:53

I always make sure that lists for my family have a range of presents, from £2 up to £50, plus a couple of outliers in case anyone’s won the lottery (new car, country house) so that people can pick something that matches their budget.
But if you’re being given a list that only has expensive items on it then I don’t think there’s any shame in saying sorry, that’s out of our price bracket, what do you want for £20?

SwishSwashSwooshSwersh · 28/11/2023 02:02

Personally I’d just text her that you need to allocate 20 per child and would it be better to move the cash into your sisters account for her to coordinate gifts? Then put cash across asap.

it’s a bit strange you didn’t agree a budget beforehand

LaurieStrode · 28/11/2023 02:26

Kids should receive from parents & Santa.

Giving actual demand lists to extended family is nonsense. Nip it now.

caringcarer · 28/11/2023 02:46

Just send them a £20 voucher each. They sound grabby.

justanothermanicmonday1 · 28/11/2023 03:04

caringcarer · 28/11/2023 02:46

Just send them a £20 voucher each. They sound grabby.

This

Topseyt123 · 28/11/2023 03:12

I'd just send them £20 in vouchers too and be done with it.

Mummyoflittledragon · 28/11/2023 04:37

Give them cash. Teens like cash.

Original poster
flowerygloves · 28/11/2023 05:44

ToDoListAddict · 27/11/2023 22:33

Do you have the same number of children?
Just wondering if she's thinking she's buying 3 gifts and you're only getting 1? (For example)

Yes same number of children as she also buys for my stepchildren

OP posts:
Original poster
flowerygloves · 28/11/2023 05:47

Sugarfree23 · 28/11/2023 00:53

I've a nearly 13yo boy who's the same.

It's done my head in trying to come up with budget ideas. Reality is most budget things just no longer exists, video games, films and music are all streamed. Lego is the only toy he wants which is ££.

For lots of kids that age they are in adult sizes for clothes so ££ too.

Options suggest you and another family member split for something off the list or give money for them to save for a later date.

That's what I'm wondering. If she's just let the kids ask for whatever they want with no guidance.

Anyway I'll ask - I don't want to add to her load so will offer vouchers/cash

OP posts:
PersephonePomegranate23 · 28/11/2023 05:56

Just send them a £20 voucher each. They sound grabby.

No don't, because then there's a chance they'll buy two of the £20 items for your kids, OP.

Stick with the plan of laying out your budget.

£50 gifts does seem like an excessive expectation, but it's just mismatched budgets. It's not 'grabby' either, they are planning on exchanging gifts, not extorting things! Again, it's just a misalignment in budget expectations that needs to be put right!

Equimum · 28/11/2023 07:27

Talk to her, but equally feel free to give cash or vouchers at the level that suits you. My eldest is 11 and we have struggled to come up with cheaper things he'd like this year. Switch games are generally £40*, his hobby things are expensive etc. we've been honest with the extended family and said that he's at an age where his wants are pricey, so please would you consider vouchers towards x, y &z

ranoutofquinoaandprosecco · 28/11/2023 07:34

I think after a certain age cash is king for teenagers as they'll save it up to get the one thing they want. If I'm asked for an idea for a present I'll usually try and suggest something around the £10 mark for family members, luckily I have a DD who still loves craft and DS who is prime mad!

Needmorelego · 28/11/2023 07:54

"Sorry Sis but that wish list is waaaay beyond my budget. Can you get the kids to have another think. No more than £20. Thanks"

Gunpla · 28/11/2023 08:00

I'm from an extremely large family. Years ago we agreed no children's presents at Christmas (that is, berries and nieces), and we set an agreed budget for birthdays. Now, my husband and I have 25 nephews and nieces between us, so you can see why, but the principle of agreeing a budget might work for you?