Their list is so expensive!

[flowerygloves]

So - we have exchanged the kid's lists. Ours were encouraged to aim for about £10-20 per gift with say 2 things at £50 ish for grandma and grandad.

One of my siblings has sent a list and EVERYTHING on it is £50 + should I ask for lower cost ideas? Or is £50 what you need to spend nowadays on 13 year olds to get anything decent?

And I bet there are loads of cheap bits and bobs that teenage boys want and need relating to their hobbies. Just because I don’t know any teenage boys intimately enough to talk to them about it and therefore can’t pinpoint exactly what they are doesn’t mean that they don’t need bits of sport kit, or art supplies, or clothing accessories, or books etc.

I'd send, "Hi our budget is £20 per child. Please send some more ideas x"

I've given small chocolate gifts (so there would be something to open) together with vouchers since my nieces/nephews became teenagers. Unless you know them very well, you are otherwise going to have to buy something random and generic or risk getting it horribly wrong.

IME teens buy presents for their friends. I doubt they spend more than £10-20 so it seems it's actually possible to spend less than £50.

I disagree, @Helenahandkart - with streaming ruling out films and music, games being £40+ each, it can be hard to find something good for a teen for under £20 if he doesn't read. The "hobbies" mine had were gaming or tabletop games, which again are pricy.

There's always toiletries and whatnot, but most lads aren't going to be exactly delighted with another Lynx set (god, I was glad when they moved out of the Lynx years!)

Almost everything mine want other than books are £25 and up.

@KatBurglar if teens can't possibly think of something under £20 then you get them a gift voucher for whatever takeaway food place is nearest their school 😂
I sometimes pop in a particular McDonald's for lunch which is across the road from a 6th Form. I am guessing they don't have a canteen because at lunch time the entire student body can be found in that Maccyds. They must be spending a fortune on their lunches each week.
(Actually do Maccyds do gift vouchers 🤔.....I must Google this 😂)

@KatBurglar quick check...... Maccyds vouchers are a no. Greggs however do them. I'd be happy with a £20 Greggs voucher 😂

@Needmorelego that’s you sorted!

I’ve already done a year of Starbucks vouchers for them all (because that’s the nearest)

@KatBurglar totally agree, I've still got a lynx africa set in the cupboard from last Christmas. Too strong a smell for the boy!

Sports / hobby stuff isn't necessarily cheap either.

I don't care if you hate lists. I wasn't here to discuss lists and if they are shit or not. We do lists

Lists are fab. I'd prefer to know what to buy instead of getting useless crap.

That’s great. That’s YOUR kid. Not EVERY kid. Perhaps there are other kids who ARE bothered about specifics. It doesn’t make you a better or worse parent doing it your way or another way.

@flowerygloves Calm! I think most families use lists.

If I didn't my LO would end up with about 6 Nerf guns, Grannies, Aunties etc have ask 'What would you like?' Nerf Gun, and they all think the same thing - that's in budget I could get that. NOOO!!

What have you decided to do with your DN?
Just teen boys aren't easy to buy for. I'm hoping it gets easier as mine gets older and wants nice clothes etc. That said my 18 yo nephew isn't easy to buy for either.

You said in your OP 'one of my siblings...'. How many siblings do you have @flowerygloves? Any chance of combining budgets with other siblings to get the kids one of the more expensive gifts they'd like? That's what I'd probably do in a similar position. Or I would give a 'cash contribution' towards one of the items. But we do specify a very clear budget of £15 per child. £50 presents should definitely come from parents or maybe grandparents, not aunts and uncles!

Separately, Menkind has a lot of good gift ideas for teens u set £20.

I'm going for cash. As someone said cash is fun at that age.

Sorry its just not very nice having your family's way of doing Christmas slagged off

Send a voucher for £20. Job done.

@flowerygloves cash is a good move!
I prefer cash to vouchers.

Don't stress most of the posters with teenboys are agreeing they are a hard age group to buy for. Mines been called a snob on this thread. Honestly he's anything but!

I only do birthdays but my younger relatives get 25 quid in cash. Friends kids get that either in cash or gaming voucher. Used to be 20 but that doesn't go very far these days.

Christmas I just buy a few family/pet gifts for everyone to enjoy.

I would hate to buy for nibling without a list. I don’t know them like I know my own children. I know my parents find it easier to buy for my lot with a list too.
Op, I like the idea of clubbing together with a sibling and buying something between you. Is that possible?

We have a £20 limit in our family and have for quite a long time now (for nephews and nieces, we don't buy for siblings at all). The older ones get cash and the younger ones can chose something up to the value of £20. Otherwise it just gets ridiculous.

Don’t worry Op. we do lists too and it’s really helpful ( apart from when some people give us theirs only a week before Christmas).
Would much rather buy something that someone wants and can be put to good use

DH’s family do lists. I hated them at first and thought it was really impersonal but when you watch the kids open the presents we put on the list vs the stuff my family get them, it really hits home how much more enjoyment they get out of something we know they will love. Also I will love my lovely new coffee machine from my in laws vs the out of style scarf my mum will probably buy me. I won’t be any less grateful but I’m a list convert now.

Also to answer your question OP, if you asked for the list I do think it’s best to say something to your DSIS. She may have just copied a list the kids gave her without checking prices. Or be being a CF. Either way best to say something

I'd say £25 seems to be the average in our family for nieces and nephews and we all spend about the same. They range in age from 10 to 16 boys and girls and all presents are about that price range so there must be something they would like!

I think it depends on how close you all are as a family. My nieces and nephews I see as pretty much my own so £50 is I think is reasonable. If though you’re not overly close as a family then I can understand why you’d feel it was a bit OTT.
I wouldn’t dream of spending that for my husbands nieces for instance as we don’t tend to see them from one year to the next so they get more of a friends kids type budget which would be around £20