Their list is so expensive!

[flowerygloves]

So - we have exchanged the kid's lists. Ours were encouraged to aim for about £10-20 per gift with say 2 things at £50 ish for grandma and grandad.

One of my siblings has sent a list and EVERYTHING on it is £50 + should I ask for lower cost ideas? Or is £50 what you need to spend nowadays on 13 year olds to get anything decent?

Sorry, nephews not berries!

How old are your children OP? Children are more expensive as they get older, I spend more on my 15yr old nephew than i would expect my sister to spend on my 3 year old.

Op just a thought, she's probably tried to get her kid to lower the budget but struggling to come up with ideas.
She maybe doesn't want to ask for money so is hoping you'll take the hint and offer money. If she doesn't want to suggest money.

It's just not easy in this age of streaming, I really miss things like DVDs and CDs they used to make good budget gifts for people. And boys are so hard, girls are slightly easier with accessories like make-up, hair and nail stuff.

@Sugarfree23 seriously there's nothing under £20 that you think teens would like.
My 15 year old is into Manga books or Penguin Classic novels. They cost on average £7.
I bet there's plenty they would actually be happy with. They just need guidance with the budget.

Seriously I can't think of anything around the £20 mark. I've really struggled with my son for the same reasons. He's not fussed by books and music and films are all streamed.

I've a couple of stocking filler ideas, battery pack, rubix cube but I've really struggled.

You could always reply with a list of more expensive presents, saying "Oh, I didn't realise we were spending £50+ on each other's kids this year - here's an updated list for my lot".😂

@Sugarfree23 t shirts? Qwertee is a bit whacky but mine have some from there or Redbubble. You can upload an image/pic onto a mug or coaster so it can be very specific to them.

We do an actual wish list, we all (my siblings etc) do £10 for a child and they can club it together so get up to £40 for any item.

@Sugarfree23 your son must have very expensive tastes.

I’ve always bought for nieces and nephews and I’m sure I’m not the only one. Not everyone WANTS to nip it in the bud.

I’d rather they had something they wanted though, so lists are helpful, but there always something in my budget range on theirs.

I agree if not then vouchers or “money towards” is fine. Decent kids will be grateful for any combination.

I think they mean send the kids a voucher for Xmas, not directly to the parents to buy a gift on behalf of OP.

Anyway, families need to talk to each other and agree. Surely if you're close enough to exchange gifts then saying "I was thinking of a budget of about 10-15 quid for the kids, is that OK?" should be fine.

I presumed it was a list to be helpful rather than demanding?
We all buy for nieces and nephews...i.e. the children in the family.
We don't exchanges lists, but do ask each other.

As for teenagers: unless they specifically want toiletries, socks, small electronics (power banks, cable tidies), chocolates, it's vouchers all the way!

We always suggest what extended family should buy as they ask. That way the child gets a present they'd like rather than something they'll never look at/use and family don't have the stress of wondering what to buy and if it will be liked.

We do however ask the budget before asking our children to think about what they'd like.

Yes! It's helpful usually!

Hehehehe

I would just say it's out of my budget. You can definitely get lovely gifts for a 13 year old priced between £10 - £20.

I always send cash to teenagers. Much appreciated.
Just stick to your budget.

That's Christmas for ya !

@pacora what makes it tacky? Wish lists are perfectly normal. It's just everyone involved needs to agree on the budget.

I just buy what I want to buy in the budget I can afford. Might be a selection box, might be a book, might be a £5 toy etc...

When on earth did sending lists out become acceptable?

When I was a kid that would have been deemed 'begging'.

Yeah, I don't think I bought my teen anything over £20.

Hes got BBQ fire pit (which is what he wanted, B&Q black friday sale reduced from £45 to £15) then Hexbugs, Meccano kit, a kenetic ball desk toy, band t-shirts, new gaming controller, wallet ninja type thing, books, a fidget thing, a calander, acne light and bottle opener.

Just checked the spread sheet and nothing over £20.

@housethatbuiltme surely lists are normal. It starts from small childhood - sending a letter to Santa or visiting him at a Grotto and saying what you'd hope to get at Christmas.
Surely lists mean you are getting something the person really would enjoy.
I also think with children it's good to get things that go with their main present from their parents.
So if parents are getting a train set - Aunty can get an train or the matching station or whatever.

Nope we never did lists, neither have my children, neither does any of DH family.

There is also no expectations of presents from each other, anything people get are an extra.

Why would someone expect me to buy the accessories to go with THEIR main gift to their child? thats their job, its literally part of what they are gifting.

When did it become 'expected' to get more than say a selection box from an aunt?

I think they mean send the kids a voucher for Xmas, not directly to the parents to buy a gift on behalf of OP.

Oh no, I meant if OP gets a £20 voucher without discussing budget, her sister might go and buy two of the £20 presents because she thinks OP will be getting her kids something more expensive!

@housethatbuiltme so your children were never taken to see Santa and answered the question "What would you like for Christmas?"
Have you spent their whole lives buying them random things - or do you ask if there's anything special they want?
As for the "expectation" from Aunty. My sister doesn't have children and never will. I only have one child and won't have any more. So my daughter is the one and only - so my sister does enjoy gifting her "more than a selection box".
I don't "expect" anyone to buy extras for a main present. But it just makes more sense if a family get together and join forces to match to give a child a decent toy that gives long term play.
What makes more sense?
Train Set (from parents)
Matching station (From aunty)
Extra train (from granny)
or
Train Set (from parents)
Random unrelated toy (from aunty)
Random unrelated toy (from granny).

@Needmorelego I'm totally with you makes more sense to get things that 'go' together.
I've had it in the past with random toys that are just never looked at.

This year all my DS wants is Lego, I've offered a new phone, new guitar but nope Lego is what he wants. Part of it might be he's doesn't like change. I have suggested money (which is a bit boring) or a couple of Aunties clubbing together.