Three more days until the little man is 10 and I'm feeling emotional tbh. I had a good talk with DH and did have a few tears because I just wish I never let the Christmas anxieties consume everything. Really had a wakeup call this year about how shit I've actually been coping with this time of year all this time. But this year will be different.
The other month I also sat DS down about it and asked him how he felt about Christmas, his birthday, and presents. He's really excited for Christmas but doesn't really feel anything for his birthday. I asked him to be honest and if it was because of how it got glossed over the years but his response was: "Nah not really. Actually having a birthday in a different month would be worse because there's all this extra attention on you and I wouldn't like that." That shocked me, which it shouldn't because he's always been a shy kid even about other things (like collecting certificates at school, standing up in front for medals at football), but it still made me emotional.
I told him I loved him so so much and he deserved to have a special day like his sisters, I just broke down in tears and gave him a massive hug and it felt like no matter how much I tried to put things right, he'd always resent me for it. But DS comforted me and he kept saying "aoh mum stop worrying" and "having a christmas birthday's kinda cool actually, its nice and chill"
Anyway I asked him some more about his birthday and asked him what he'd like to do, He doesn't want a cake but LOVES the sound of birthday pizza decorated like a rainbow friends character. He wants the big fountain sparklers on it but he begged us not to sing because it's embarrassing 
(we can't promise we won't).
Presents wise the boy wouldn't even tell us what he wants for Christmas because he hates asking for things. I had lots of ideas, and got him the same amount of presents as his sisters for the 25th...and then half that again for the 27th. It did mean I had to cut back a bit on the girls but it felt a lot better doing it this way. It was hard finding birthday paper in the shops so I bought some plain gold paper for his birthday gifts (it was advertised as christmas paper but no patterns on it so can be used for birthdays).
His biggest present is the thing we both know he always wanted because he spent the last few months looking at them...a football table. He's getting that on the 27th.
We told a white lie to family and inlaws that DS was really looking forward to his 10th birthday, and they have sent birthday presents as well as Christmas 