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Original poster

Christmas Eve Birthday

88 replies

Sugarfree23 · 30/09/2023 08:05

How do you give a child a bundle of birthday presents and then build them up for Christmas day excitement?

Until now we've held birthday a few days earlier but feel he's getting bigger and birthday should be his actual birthday.

Or do we continue to do it earlier until he's well beyond Santa ?

OP posts:
IndeedDanielJackson · 30/09/2023 08:13

I have a Christmas eve baby and we always just prioritised his birthday. So on his birthday it's his day and we don't start getting excited etc for santa until after dinner. We always kept Christmas a bit quieter, largely because we couldn't afford to go mad! He will be 18 this Christmas so it's all a lot easier and this is all he and his siblings have known.

His youngest sister was then born on new years day so Christmas is just a quiet day between birthdays round here!

CowboyJoanna · 30/09/2023 22:29

My DS was born two days after Christmas. It's a crap time of year for birthdays, this is going to sound really bad but we're so worn out by all the Christmas festivities we just don't make a huge fuss of it. DS gets a card but we don't bother with extra presents with birthday wrapping, nor cake (too much food left over to eat up!!). Thankfully DS couldn't care less about birthdays anyway so he's happy, but my mum always goes on at me about how it isn't fair

But if your son is used to a proper celebration though i would continue to do that, but maybe on Christmas Eve so he gets a sense of celebrating the actual day?

Fezbomb · 07/10/2023 21:12

We tend to do either a birthday party or big family day out the week before to celebreate and then on Christmas Eve have birthday presents in the morning and a chilled afternoon playing with his new toys / building and setting them up. We then go out for a birthday meal followed by singing and happy birthday and cake with grandparents and aunties and uncles. This works well for us as there's no tidying up after tea and it feels like a proper birthday celebration. We don't do Christmas eve boxes etc as I feel like this would detract from his birthday which isn't fair

Original poster
Sugarfree23 · 07/10/2023 21:34

@Fezbomb I totally get what you mean about Christmas Eve boxes detracting from the Birthday. I'm so glad I never started that tradition for my oldest.

However you have given me a genuis idea. We should do dinner out, instead of our usual takeaway in. I'm thinking somewhere family / Birthday friendly (TGI or F&B). Don't know why I haven't thought about it before, possibly that combination of age, and a few years of covid restrictions and other worries.

OP posts:
NuffSaidSam · 07/10/2023 21:39

If he's still young enough for Santa, I'd carry on doing it a few days earlier. It's surely better for him that way and any siblings looking forward to Christmas.

I think kids care about having a fun birthday rather than it being on a specific day. If I were you I'd also find an excuse to give him some presents (maybe even a party) in the summer, it's rubbish having a Christmas birthday!

Paynefully · 07/10/2023 21:40

This must be so hard OP.
Ny eldest was born on New Year’s Eve and o thought that was a pain in the arse, nobody wants to come to a kids party on NYE.

but in terms of not making it Christmassy, for us we make sure to take down the tree and Christmas decorations before the 30th ready for her birthday in the 31st. Obviously this doesn’t quite work for you on the 24th 😅

my mum is also born on the 30th and she agrees and has always been open about the fact having a ‘Christmas’ birthday is absolutely shit, there will always be people who wrap birthday presents in Christmas wrapping and some who say “this is for your birthday and Christmas” which is really shitty tbh, especially for a kid.

Me and DP have discussed the possibility of celebrating a half birthday in the summer instead, DD always wants a bouncy castle in the garden for her birthday but we can’t really do that in December 😅 We’re just not sure how DD would feel us celebrating a half birthday and going something smaller on her actual birthday ☹️

AceofPentacles · 07/10/2023 21:43

We had parties at the start of December and one year in June for half birthday! But Xmas eve always been a birthday day with decorations and balloons and birthday tea. DS always loves to get presents a day earlier than anyone else!

TMess · 07/10/2023 21:44

My birthday is Christmas Day and I always loved it tbh. My parents made a big effort though - birthday paper, decor, no “this is Christmas and birthday!” gifts, etc. and I usually had to have my “friend party” in November or January. The whole extended family was always there for my birthday and I got twice as many gifts as my friends, what’s not to love. I still quite like it as an adult because at an age where birthdays aren’t really a “thing” anymore, nobody can escape mine. 😂

Blanketpolicy · 07/10/2023 21:47

We have always kept birthdays low key here regardless of the time of year and went all out at Christmas so it wouldnt have been a big deal for us.

Birthdays were smallish gift and/or party/special dinner with nice dessert in/out/delivered as requested.

Paynefully · 07/10/2023 22:11

@TMess did you ever (as a kid obviously) think about the fact you’re birthday and Christmas was so close together and then you have to wait a complete year before being celebrated again? - my birthday is in June for example and I used to love the 6 month countdown from Christmas to my birthday, from my birthday to Christmas again. - I feel sad that my daughter has to watch the majority of our family (all born May-September) have birthdays then and not have to wait as long for another big ‘present day’ 😅 I might be totally over thinking that one but for some reason it really makes me sad 😂

Ginger1982 · 07/10/2023 22:27

Paynefully · 07/10/2023 22:11

@TMess did you ever (as a kid obviously) think about the fact you’re birthday and Christmas was so close together and then you have to wait a complete year before being celebrated again? - my birthday is in June for example and I used to love the 6 month countdown from Christmas to my birthday, from my birthday to Christmas again. - I feel sad that my daughter has to watch the majority of our family (all born May-September) have birthdays then and not have to wait as long for another big ‘present day’ 😅 I might be totally over thinking that one but for some reason it really makes me sad 😂

I'm a December birthday too. As a kid it didn't bother me. As an adult it's a bit difficult when I get asked what I want for birthday and Christmas so close together. I feel greedy if I ask for things which, if I had a birthday in the summer, wouldn't seem like so much.

TMess · 07/10/2023 23:30

@Paynefully not that I remember - but I do think it contributed to the fact that I’m always in the holiday mood long before anyone else. 😂

Original poster
Sugarfree23 · 08/10/2023 00:31

@Paynefully yip my whole family is winter birthdays and yes it seems like a long time from one winter to the next.

I do keep money gifts back to spend later in the year to try and shorten the gap. There's not an easy answer. I know some would do half birthday but it just doesn't feel right to me.

OP posts:
HauntedPencil · 08/10/2023 09:09

Mine has a Christina's birthday and that is the rub - they have everything together abs as their tastes change a bit throughout the year as kids so it's a long wait to ask for a big thing

Now that he's getting more money he saves that up and we try not to spend till summer!

BellyDancer124 · 08/10/2023 11:27

CowboyJoanna · 30/09/2023 22:29

My DS was born two days after Christmas. It's a crap time of year for birthdays, this is going to sound really bad but we're so worn out by all the Christmas festivities we just don't make a huge fuss of it. DS gets a card but we don't bother with extra presents with birthday wrapping, nor cake (too much food left over to eat up!!). Thankfully DS couldn't care less about birthdays anyway so he's happy, but my mum always goes on at me about how it isn't fair

But if your son is used to a proper celebration though i would continue to do that, but maybe on Christmas Eve so he gets a sense of celebrating the actual day?

As a member of the Christmas birthday club this made me so sad Sad this is how it was for me growing up and I hated it.

shoofly · 08/10/2023 11:35

DS1 birthday is 27th and my Mum's birthday was 28th. She always said he was her best birthday present ever and as she said Christmas birthdays were shit when she was a child, we had to make sure he had a proper birthday. So he's always had separate presents in birthday wrapping paper and birthday bunting and the odd balloon. In primary school, a party was always before Christmas and my friends daughter (who was in same class ) is the same day so it was usually a joint party.
This year they'll be 18 but they aren't close now so although we usually see them, they don't celebrate together.

I think going out for dinner is a great idea. I do think it's only fair that theres some effort to split Christmas and birthday

Original poster
Sugarfree23 · 08/10/2023 12:55

I definitely always make a bit of an effort, with gifts. But at the same time the actual day feels like a damp squib, but trying to figure out how to make it special and not detract from the carrots and Santa magic.

The dinner idea with cake in a restaurant is genius! I'm thinking we might do early dinner / lunch. But I just need to decide where and book it.

OP posts:
Bluenile1 · 08/10/2023 13:10

I had a Xmas Eve baby. She’s 18 now. We always make her birthday special. She adores her birthday. House has happy birthday banners etc up. Pressies b4 breakfast. Friends come over in the afternoon to celebrate and cake. Since she was 14 we do an early Xmas eve swim with friends. It’s good fun. Last Xmas we included bubbly on the beach as she was 18 so will prob keep that up as well as the customary hot chocolate.
in the evening we get into prep for Xmas dinner etc etc. I love having a Xmas baby. When she was younger class party before or after Xmas. Actually there were always shows circus etc available to go to if we wanted to bring a gang of her pals.

ShowOfHands · 08/10/2023 13:15

I'm a NYE birthday and I bloody love it and always have. I loved the fact that the house was decorated and full of lights and festivity. It felt like an extension of a period of joy and celebration, rather than an afterthought.

OP, I'd continue to do it a few days before to mark the difference slightly.

BlairWaldorfOG · 08/10/2023 20:05

Christmas Eve baby here, my parents nailed it. Always woke up to a birthday banner and balloons, handful of birthday presents and cards then we'd do something nice so go somewhere child friendly for lunch. Christmas build up resumed when we got back. I loved (still love) my birthday, party with friends happened before the date. Maybe I'm weird but I loved getting the excitement of my birthday followed by the even bigger feelings of excitement about Christmas day the next day.

Bankholidayboredom23 · 08/10/2023 20:11

I was going to suggest the half birthday in the summer but I've been pipped to the post! All the December birthdays in our family are adults so we tend to do something earlier in December before Christmas stuff gets too crazy.

CowboyJoanna · 08/10/2023 20:49

BellyDancer124 · 08/10/2023 11:27

As a member of the Christmas birthday club this made me so sad Sad this is how it was for me growing up and I hated it.

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Yes I suppose if you're a "birthday" fan it is really crap. If DS was big into his birthdays he'd get extra presents too (well, not "extra" presents because he'd get the same amount of presents as his sisters, but we'd spread them out so a couple of them he'd have to wait until the 27th to open).

But the fact is, he's nearly 10 and we've always done his birthdays like this. He's never had a party obviously, its not practical to have a birthday cake because it wont get eaten (normally we cut off a piece of leftover cake and stick a number sparkler in it, last year we saved Christmas pudding til the 27th and we sang happy birthday while DH flamed it. We were all in hysterics Grin)

When December rolls around, he only talks about what he wants for Christmas. It's like his birthday never really crosses his mind all that much to be honest.

CowboyJoanna · 08/10/2023 20:49

We never believed in "half birthdays" in our house. If DS were allowed a half birthday in June, his sisters would want one too and none of them have Christmas birthdays

Original poster
Sugarfree23 · 08/10/2023 20:58

@CowboyJoanna do the sisters not get birthday presents either?

OP posts:
Qwerty21 · 08/10/2023 22:21

CowboyJoanna · 08/10/2023 20:49

Yes I suppose if you're a "birthday" fan it is really crap. If DS was big into his birthdays he'd get extra presents too (well, not "extra" presents because he'd get the same amount of presents as his sisters, but we'd spread them out so a couple of them he'd have to wait until the 27th to open).

But the fact is, he's nearly 10 and we've always done his birthdays like this. He's never had a party obviously, its not practical to have a birthday cake because it wont get eaten (normally we cut off a piece of leftover cake and stick a number sparkler in it, last year we saved Christmas pudding til the 27th and we sang happy birthday while DH flamed it. We were all in hysterics Grin)

When December rolls around, he only talks about what he wants for Christmas. It's like his birthday never really crosses his mind all that much to be honest.

Show quote history

Of course his birthday doesn't cross his mind cos he's never had one 😞 poor kid. It's not hard to make some effort.