Poncetastic Christmas 2021

[VivaJen]

Welcome to the 2021 Poncetastic thread. With a nod to Fellatio (wherever she is), at the stroke of midnight, let the poncing commence.

OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobs worth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapés and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessie’s' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

Does anyone know where I could get flocking power or spray? (Bonus points if it’s available in RoI). Snow spray isn’t thick enough and I end up having to use way too much.

Ooh I'll have a look after I've had a shower, thanks @OnTheHillNotOverIt!

Or something like either dauphinois potatoes or some chocolate ganache @lucysmam Both freeze really well. The dauphinois would be useful for one of those "I can't be bothered to do potatoes" days and the ganache could be used in a Yule log.

I tried to make a wreath like the lady on the video upthread, but I couldn't even get my sticks to go in a circle! Gah, she made it look so easy.

I have a few materials from LAST year that never got made into anything. Which I should really use before getting into anything else!Mother of pearl buttons, which were to be a garland, and wooden beads, which I'm not sure what I intended to do with them. I'm thinking perhaps another garland might be the easiest! Anyone made a garland before, any tips?

The Dutch houses look wonderful. I feel like they are within my capacity, but hey I always think that until I start!

@JoyPeaceHope they're so simple! Cut round the outside, leaving the flaps, cut out the windows, score along the flaps & fold them back. Add battery tea lights & "ta-da" 🥳

The trees and stag I posted upthread are from a different website but equally simple once it clicks to cut the smaller tree first & not the big one, so you don't cut through any bits you need (not that I did that, of course

I have a few materials from LAST year that never got made into anything. Which I should really use before getting into anything else!Mother of pearl buttons, which were to be a garland, and wooden beads, which I'm not sure what I intended to do with them. I'm thinking perhaps another garland might be the easiest!

@JoyPeaceHope If you’re not set on using them for a garland, I think I’d use the buttons on a cushion cover. If you got a plain one and sewed a snowflake on in white, then added the buttons, sort of like the photo below, (not my photo) but more snowflakey, that would look quite effective. Or sew them closely together in a star pattern.

With the wooden beads, I’d make pine cone elves with them (again, not my photo) and put them on the tree. If you fancy a garland, I’d add a white tassel every foot or so, just to give it a bit of impact.

May I just show off my envelope embosser that arrived yesterday? I went for first names as DH and I have different surnames, and it is every bit as poncey as I’d hoped!

@lucysmam please could you repost paper folding websites? I did scroll back a bit but failed to find them.

What equipment do you need? A board and Stanley type knife?

[quote TheWoollybacksWife]**@DanceWithYourBalloon* just dampen them. Hovering over them should* be ok but I find acrylic goes a bit floppy when exposed to heat. This could purely be down to my ironing technique That's fine for blankets but the snowflakes need a bit of definition. [/quote]
Thank you! I shall dampen them and maybe give a squirt of starch too.
I was bit nervous of melting them! 😂

Thank you to the posters who were kind enough to say they liked my last year’s wrapping ☺️ @Sn0tnose I’d just say not to make it too complicated for yourself. I bought my nephew one of those dinosaur excavation kits and addressed it to him as Professor (nephew’s name) in the basement of the Natural History Museum, South Kensington etc. Then I felt like all the address had to match the gifts inside 🙄
There are so many great ideas on this thread. I don’t usually do any baking but am toying with the idea of attempting homemade sausage rolls this year 🤔
I wanted to do a Twelfth Night cake (some lovely pics of iced ones online with crowns on top) but I’m not feeling confident.

I keep meaning to make this one; I might get round to it this year. www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/galette-des-rois

@OnTheHillNotOverIt this is the one with the houses.

And this one for the trees.

There's all sorts of lovely things on the second one, I haven't properly browsed the first one yet.

I just use a stanley type craft knife & cutting mat for them. I do have a swivel blade craft knife too but struggle with turning it smoothly :)

@sueelleker. Are you planning to include a bean or one of those porcelain feves Sue?
I’ve actually already got a couple of really sweet little porcelain ones that I bought before I knew what they were.

[quote Micawbs]@sueelleker. Are you planning to include a bean or one of those porcelain feves Sue?
I’ve actually already got a couple of really sweet little porcelain ones that I bought before I knew what they were.[/quote]
I hadn't thought of it.

So many fab ideas. Absolutely loving this thread.
I started maternity leave this week and bought myself some little Christmas card cross stitch kits from the Works. Have become absolutely hooked despite having carpel tunnel in both wrists. I had a look on Etsy and I'm thinking of buying a poncey Cross stitch calligraphy font and making gift tags. I have a notion that sewn onto some felt at the back they'd make nice Christmas tree decorations in future years for the recipients

@sueelleker I am going to add the galette de rois to my immense list of recipes to try this winter.

Finally got myself into gear, have the cake in the oven and spent yesterday making:

Mango Chutney
Gingerbread Gin
Christmas Pudding(s)
3 kinds of mincemeat
Speculoos
Chilli Jam

As it’s a bit early for making my decorations, I’m looking for other things to make. Might try Red Cabbage and Bucks Fizz curd from Good Housekeeping.

THREE kinds of mincemeat is serious poncing!

@VivaJen

THREE kinds of mincemeat is serious poncing!

I've done 3 this year too!

I have a batch of mince pies in the oven right now, in fact! Most have Delia's mincemeat from last year's batch though.

I do have a tendency to go OTT!

Speculaas was meant to say Speculaas Liqueur. I might try some mince pies later as I misjudged my jars and I’ve got a bit leftover.

DH will probably injure himself eye rolling later.

@RubyFakeLips

Finally got myself into gear, have the cake in the oven and spent yesterday making:

Mango Chutney
Gingerbread Gin
Christmas Pudding(s)
3 kinds of mincemeat
Speculoos
Chilli Jam

As it’s a bit early for making my decorations, I’m looking for other things to make. Might try Red Cabbage and Bucks Fizz curd from Good Housekeeping.

Oooo can you share your chilli jam recipe?

2 big bottles have gone into the gin marmalade I made the other day. 🤩

Ingredients bought for Christmas pudding vodka, hairy bikers recipe, and after eights for the chocolate mint vodka which even my alcohol fussy son loves (adult).

I want to make some line come decorations with DGS but the instructions say to Hyde a hot blue gun , as he's only 4 and I'm dyspraxic I'm wary of this as one of us could get burnt. Can anyone advise something else? I'm trying to stick ribbon to the cones in order to hang them.

Pine cone not line cone.

@DanceWithYourBalloon, I know you didn't ask me, but I've been making chilli jam for years (with homegrown chillies). This recipe gives me jam that everybody who has tried it keep begging me each year for more!

It's beautiful. 🌶😍

@goose1964 I use bostik all purpose clear glue for a lot of my craft projects and I find it holds better than hot glue. You need to hold it for a few moments but it dries fast.

I still wouldn’t let a four year old loose with it though! I’m dyspraxic too and I’ve never managed to do a project with a glue gun without burning a finger at least once.