Struggling with small present pile guilt

[BillHadersNewWife]

Stupid I know...I went over board when my DC were small....they had massive piles as little children....now they're 15 and 11 and the things they want are much more expensive.

I've just gone through my list of what I have got and what I have to get still and I'm worried the piles will look miserable.

They will have about 10 gifts each...none of them are very big physically either so I am a bit worried.

Is there anything I can add which is big in size but not something that's just tat?

I thought of beach towels which they both love...and maybe a fleecy blanket...any other ideas please?

10 gifts each is more than enough. Don’t buy just for the sake of buying. They shouldn’t be expecting massive piles at those ages anyway.

Put in bigger boxes or boxes within boxes to create a further element of suspense.

Cushions for their bed?

beanbags to sit on?

10 gifts each is plenty! My 4&3 year old are getting 12 each(not all toys!) plus 3 joint presents. I admit I went wayyyy overboard this year. I'd say 10 is still pretty generous and I wouldn't worry. They're certainly old enough to understand that the presents are more expensive.

Not what you asked but I hope that offers some reassurance

Dressing gowns?

A box of their favourite snacks/biscuits? Socks. Bubble bath.

I think expectations change as you're older. Could you wrap a joint gift of a family game to play Christmas afternoon?

A few bits from poundland. Some things are ok. Perhaps a plastic football to knock about with.

"10 gifts each is more than enough. Don’t buy just for the sake of buying. They shouldn’t be expecting massive piles at those ages anyway"

I agree.

I’m just aghast that parents feel like this ??? 10 presents is loads !

One of the big (around 1kg?) of Cadbury's chocolate?
You can also buy a yard of Oreos or similar with Jaffa cakes.

I think they understand as they get older that the "huge" pile of Playmobil, ride on toys, huge chunks of fisherprice plastic, gets replaced with things a tenth of the size but ten times the cost. Phones, tablets, generally tech stuff the suppliers try and make smaller year on year.

I know it doesn't have that same woooooowwwwww as when they're smaller and they seem to rush down to a pile bigger then they are. But they are half the size for a start. And a scooter and a slide are bloody enormous, unless your older DC are into sports and genuinely want things like skis and helmets and bulky equipment, older children get compact, but expensive piles.

If you want the overall image to look bigger, maybe some christmassy helium balloons bunched together? Stage the area so to speak.

Mumsnet and social media are awful for making parents think they have to buy tonnes of stuff. It’s all become so competitive and not in the spirit of christmas. It absolutely blows my mind reading about how much money people spend on their kids at christmas and the photos of gigantic piles of presents.

10 presents for a kid is loads.

10 gifts is a huge number of presents!

Ours have one tree present (maybe two if the desired thing is a very little one) from parents.

(Plus a stocking, which can contain lots of stuff, but the key words are small and inexpensive (and no business goer than a pillow case))

However, you must know that at you're at the lavish/conspicuous end, so to go back to your question: yy to fleecy throws and dressing gowns. Do they need any new jumpers, hats with big pompoms? A metre of Jaffa cakes? Drop into TKMAxx for other treat food (we got a huge tub of jelly beans for the family last year and it was enormously popular) and toiletries - they usually have discounted big bars of soap (with nice scents), plus branded sports socks

Agree that 10 is loads. Totally pointless to pad out with things they don’t really want or need just to make the pile look bigger. Also, will they not get a few more from family?

However, you must know that at you're at the lavish/conspicuous end

Really no! I don't think I am actually. I know people whose children are similar ages to mine and they seem to have piles of 20 gifts...I can't do that. It's not feasible.

You've all made me feel MUCH better though. I

Rather than buying more gifts start presenting them differently. About this age we started having the presents all round the tree wrapped. The fun of puling them our and finding which had my name on and opening them individually made it more special.

powerfulLizard As I mentioned, we're in Australia...sadly no festive pom pom hats or jumpers here. It's all beach towels and bikinis at Christmas. Weird I know!

@user1480880826 maybe social media, but MN (at least the parts I read) is all about the competitively minimal gifting. People are strenuously discouraged from excessive buying.

Rather than unnecessarily buying more, I think at 15 and 11 it would be better to just remind them that their gift pile won’t be huge because good things come in small packages. Though I’d imagine they already realise that.

I honestly don’t think dc spend half as much time thinking about the size of their gift pile as we parents do! I mean, did you? Surely when you’re past Santa age and hoping for specific expensive items then you’re just delighted on Christmas morning that you got that thing! I know I was and in our house young dc did get a “pile” of 10ish gifts.

I certainly wasn’t traumatised the year I got a hi-fi system and a selection box even though the younger children would have had more gifts, I was over the moon! Stop overthinking it and if in doubt then have a conversation with your dc.

Agree with @wellhellohi that it’s far more fun to put all gifts mixed together under the tree. Part of the tradition is then doling them out.
I also agree that 10 presents is LOADS. it’s so ridiculous nowadays how many presents some kids get. Completely devalues any gift if it’s just part of a huge pile!

I will let them know in advance thanks everyone.

Omg consumerism at its worst. The planet is in crisis and you're buying more stuff for no reason - just stop. Your kids won't remember all the tat you brought for them, unfortunately the planet will

What will your DC appreciate more...

• 10 thoughtfully chosen gifts they want, although small in size
• a pile of stuff they don't want but looks impressive wrapped under the tree

Mine are only 6 & 8 but already the piles are shrinking.
I've got a firm memory from a few years back. Village had a tradition where parents dropped a present off at a central point, then Santa would go round the streets delivering them to the kids, we have street parties etc. Price limit was ten Euro. My DD2 was 2.5 and the youngest there that year, all the others were school age. DDs box was more than double the size of everyone else's (fake Duplo, but had quite a few dinosaurs in). One of the older kids said 'why is hers so big' and promptly told by his friends 'because she's a TODDLER and their toys are massive'. Kids get it. Presents shrink as you grow.

Bert The planet is in crisis and you're buying more stuff for no reason

No. I asked for more ideas...that weren't tat.

Obviously I realise it's not good to buy things for the sake of it or I wouldn't have posted. Wind your neck in a bit.