Is my budget for the children too stingy?

[BretonStripe]

We have two dc, approaching 3 and 6. We're ok for money, plenty of savings. Have always thought £100 for Christmas is plenty, but am going to struggle this year as dc1 would love an £85 Micro scooter, to replace his battered cheap scooter (which he uses almost daily).

By the time I've bought nice pj's/onesie, pants, books, a bit of Lego and a board game etc my budget is nearly gone, so wouldn't be able to get the scooter.

I grew up fairly poor; council house, Mum struggled to pay rent/didn't have fancy things etc so think I struggle with being spendy sometimes.

What is an average Xmas budget for people who are not poor, but don't want to spend loads? (Can't understand people who have to spend £300+ on each child each year).

25 from us, 25 from both sets of grandparents plus 15 on stockings (useful fun stuff usually). For bigger gifts we group cash for birthdays and xmas's

Mine are similar ages to yours and this year it's around £100 each. Next year it will probably be more as they will be ready to move up a size on their bikes.

Its interesting what P00p mentioned above as they only get presents at Christmas and on their birthdays as they have so much already and we prefer to put money into their bank accounts.

We are middle class I guess and live in a wonderful area. We can only give this life style to our children through being restraint spending wise. They have great financial values.

We aren't particularly materialistic and our children aren't either. They are always greatful

I disagree that present are frivolous things that are not needed. My DH has bought some essentials as my xmas gift and I'm very happy

I do 100 each and could afford more but choose not to. My dc will be delighted by their gifts but they do also get extra stuff from family.

The people who say that underwear and clothes aren't pressies, had better tell my lot. You must also have plenty of money.
Mine have always enjoyed getting these as presents, my dd said she can't wait for new pyjamas and smelly stuff too. It's more to open too.
It wouldn't be Christmas without the essentials as well as the frivolous.
If your children do have to wait until Christmas as you don't have much money, why not include them.

Whilst generally speaking I think it's a good idea to have a budget for Christmas presents as it's easy to spend more than you intended, if there is something particular that you know your child will cherish, and you can afford it, I would go for it. Maybe spend a bit less on his next birthday instead.

And remember kids have no idea how much things cost and need it to look the same, not cost the same!

DH and I similar in background - we spend way more than that and always have. But then although they get cheques etc from other family (not mega bucks, token gifts) they have never really been given actual gifts from anyone.

In general we don't give things such as scooters or bikes as gifts. They use them as a mode of transport so have always been bought them when required. Same with clothes although they will always get PJs/underwear etc added into their christmas pile, they aren't part of the budget. Having said that, like a poster above, we don't really have a set budget. Mine are now teenagers and I had a rough budget of £500 each. I've already gone over it a little for DS1. I'll not necessarily make DS2 up to exactly the same - there isn't a huge difference, as I'd just being something for the sake of it. It's swings and roundabouts really, iirc DS2s birthday things were a little more than DS1s and also we are paying for music lessons for him and not for DS1 but then DS1s phone contract is more.

I think they are treated fairly though not always exactly the same.

OP, I'd buy the scooter if he needs it and would enjoy it and you can afford it. Life's too short to make everything in life a lesson and you don't spoil children by buying them things, there is more to it than that. My DSs never ask for anything are always thankful for the gifts they receive and behave well and work hard at school. Technically according MNet, they have been overindulged...:o

Also some of the more frugal people on here forget to mention that the grandparents bought their DC a pony, a computer and an ipad for their birthday.

We have one preschooler DD and spend all in all about £120 on her, including stocking, various bits and pieces, some books/DVDs, a couple of clothing items, and a main present. Stocking costs about £20 (mainly items bought in sales/Tiger etc. so not expensive), and the main present will be about £60 (in previous years a big train set, IKEA kitchen, Mini Micro scooter). This year I'm thinking about playmags, which might cost a bit more for the main present than we usually spend; but DD doesn't get that many presents from relatives/friends and my family tend to spend relatively little on children's presents - say, about £20-ish.

From loads of previous threads on this topic, my impression is that we are very much average/in the middle how much we spend. (The average spend on this thread seems quite low - normally it seems to range between £60 and £300). I anticipate that each year it will go up a bit, so probably around £150 in future years.

In relation to the income thing a pp mentioned - we are quite "middle class" but have quite a low income at the moment for various reasons. So we keep our Christmasses quite low-key, and birthdays even more so. If we had more disposable cash I probably wouldn't spend much more if anything. We do buy DD books, toys etc. during the year, and I don't normally give clothes as presents, unless they're special ones (eg. party dresses).

I usually do £100, although ds needs a new bike this year, so its more like £150. Wriggle room as a bike is more of an essential.

You've reminded me, DD age 8 said at the weekend "I really need a new hat and gloves now it's colder". (She's right). She then fixed me with a Look and added "And don't you go trying to give them to me as a Christmas present, they don't count you know!"

They're in the cupboard upstairs waiting to be wrapped

I find it odd that your children have the same budget at their ages
£100 would buy loads for a 2 year old, but not much for a 6 year old

I've never understood the people who try to spend the same amount of money on young children for this reason
Children generally don't know the cost of things (and even if they do, Santa doesn't need money for presents!) so I've always bought mine the same amount of presents, regardless of if one of their piles adds up to £100 and the other £20, as long as they have the same amount of actual presents and its stuff they want, that's all the kids care about

I think pjs and character knickers , plus charcter toothbrushes and bubble bath are presents. I just wouldn't include them in the main gift budget. My budget is approx £150 per dc but that's not including stockings actually thinking about it it does include the pjs because the elves bring those.

I spend lots on DS at Christmas but we have the money and we like playing toys and reading books together so why not? He is spoiled rotten but that doesn't make him spoilt. We had lots of presents growing up and the day was never just about that. I get fed up of the withholding of treats to raise nice children all the time on mumsnet. Lots of people don't have the choice and can't afford a big Christmas but I just don't get posts like this. You have the money, he will use it, he will love it, it will make his Christmas magical. Where's the catch? It just seems to be making a point for the sake of it. Will he get money back when his toys are passed down? Is it more sensible to buy a cheap scooter that won't last so you still have budget for character underwear? Aaaarrrrgghh I'm baffled

We spend around £1000 between 5dc. It works out to about £50 per big pressie, 3 pressies each. One they ask for, and 2 we choose. Then £50 per stocking, which will include lots of goodies to eat, toiletries, games and a t shirt or something.

We don't have an annual holiday and Christmas is the only time DH gets more than 2 days in a row off work, so we treat it as a special holiday. This is the first year in 17 that he won't be working Christmas eve and he will have a full 15 days off instead of 10!

We fill the house with an obscene amount of food and drink and our huge extended family visit lots.

But if you asked the kids what makes Christmas, they would say shortcake animal biscuits, gingerbread stuffing and pigs in blankets.

I would get the scooter if you know he will love it.

My DC are now adult and teen , we have never had a set budget and we have never price matched , they get what they want / we think they would like . Some years we may spend £100 other years we may spend £1000 , we don't price match because I figure it evens out over the years . If you can afford to spend more than the £100 ,and the scooter would be used then just spend the extra . Despite our approach , or maybe because of it , neither of my DC are remotely materialistic and the bit of Christmas they enjoy is the buying gifts for everyone else .

I don't have a set budget but will probably end up around 150. I wouldn't include clothes at this point, since I only buy what I like and they're too young to have any opinion. If they're looking for specific fancy duds in years to come, then they'll be part of the present.

It does sound odd that he really needs a new scooter, he love to have a new scooter. You love to see his face when he gets a scooter. Money is no object. Yet feel should wait rather than spend over £100 or only if he gets money as gift. Just very odd.
do you just want to be able to say oh I never spend more than £100?

His main present next year could well be a must have craze toy for £40 and plenty left over. If you spent £30 over this year surely it dosnt matter?

specific fancy duds :o should indeed be part of the present, My teens aren't really into clothes so therefore wouldn't consider a designer top a gift but for other teenagers that would be a prized possession. In order to make their present pile look decent (since most of their gifts will be £££ but tiny), I will add in things such as new PJs and a tshirt or two or a hoody and underwear etc. But they aren't part of their gifts really.

We have new pjs on Christmas eve here. Shoes, pants, pj etc are bought in the supermarket/ outlet store when needed so my dc don't really see them as presents. Mine however have a long gap between birthday and xmas so, invariably we have bought stuff like scooters, bikes and other potential presents as and when they are needed as it would be daft to wait to xmas.

My 5 and nearly 3 have about 100 each (stocking on top) tbh the same budget has worked out well as the youngest has a lot of hand me down/shared toys already so try and buy quality stuff that will last rather than just filler. Ds has 3 presents that were around 25 quid each and any of them could be a "main present" so that £100 has gone quite far for him - he will have around 6 or 7 to open.

I bought him a new scooter in the summer when he outgrew his little one (which has gone to his sister) but I got a £40 one which is more than adequate for a decent scooter. When I have given such things as gifts then it's for a birthday as we generally have fewer gifts then anyway. If he was having it as a gift then it's reasonable that there should be a bit less on other things, but I would do any or all of these: cheaper scooter, bit of wiggle room on the budget, make the rest go as far as I could with toys and wants rather than clothes.

My kids have been wearing their woolly hats this last few days and did at the last cold snap, they'd have been pretty chilly if I'd kept them till Christmas, so I never understand that (unless of course old things still fit)

I spend about £150 each on my two. Plus a stocking. They get new Xmas pjs which I don't include in that amount because in all honesty I buy the pjs because I think it's ncie to have new pjs for Xmas, not because they want or need them (I usually buy a few multipacks in the next sale for normal pjs).
TBH I don't really have a set budget though, I encourage them to write a list with 3 things on, they may get all 3 things. They may get only one thing.

if you can't splurge money you can easily afford on your dc at Xmas what's the point in having it?

Savings are worth cock all at the minute anyway, might as well spend it on something that brings a small child joy.

I find on here people all seem to spend £50-100 but in real life most people I know spend around £200 and more if a specific gift is more expensive. Imo as long as you aren't going in to debt it actually doesn't matter what you spend. Kids have no idea of cost so wont know if their gifts have cost £10 or £1000 but will know if they got their wished for gift or not. I would buy the scooter. Yes it isn't all about the presents but bringing them happiness with a gift doesn't make all the other bits less magical, same as not buying the scooter wont make everything else you do more special.