Poncetastic 2016

[WaitingForEgg]

Ok this thread may commence from midnight in honour of Fellatio. I sadly abandoned last years mid run due to pre-eclampsia and early birth of my December baby and therefore fully intend to throw myself fully into this years festivities:

"OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom. A bit like the war in Afghanistan, only with nicer food and sparkly shoes.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobsworth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapes and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessies' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

Let's surpass all poncestastic pasts please

Waaaah I've reached the end of the thread :( had a friend over tonight who loves a bit of poncing herself so getting all excited now :)

I'm going to use them to pop my homemade bits in. Scarf / coasters / gin / truffles etc. Hopefully should fit if I lay bits down.

Fell off thread after asking question - bad form. Thanks cookie for answering ages ago.

Why have I never seen this thread before?! I love a bit of Christmas ponce. Although we're going on holiday for Christmas this year so won't be doing too much. Will miss cooking Christmas dinner! I have planned to make all edible Christmas tree decorations this year though; popcorn garland, gingerbread stars and orange slices. Will add some pics from past Christmases later.

So this year I will make Christmas pud, cake and mincemeat. I have a glut of apples and have already made spiced apple chutney. Going to make apple butter I think because it looks delicious, apple sauce for Christmas dinner and then probably just freeze the rest.

I always make decorations and cards with the kids so need to think of some ideas for those.
Also thinking about making little fimo place settings this year. Each of us in the family in Christmas get up and reflecting our personalities. . Dd as a little girl elf lying on the floor colouring, ds as a little boy elf with a car and possibly an apple, dh as a Santa with black beard and games conrroller and me as Mrs Santa and my camera. Probably bitten off more than I can chew. But not I've written it I have committed to it.
That'll probably be enough as I also have dh's 40th cake to make in nov and ds's 3rd birthday party the week before Christmas.

I'll probably try and do too much and get stressed, as usual.

And dh says he wants to make Toffee apple cider again. Though whether he will is another matter. ..

I have a good friend who makes wine with the wilkos kit, love the idea of the end product hate the idea of a bucket sat in the kitchen for months! Fortuately she gifts a bottle or two at Christmas so I can enjoy her hard work and bucket hording!

The fimo sounds awesome!

Do you guys dress up on Christmas Day? I really want to wear a posh dress till after lunch when we will go for a walk.

We dress in Sunday best as we sing in the choir at dawn mass, fingers crossed I get a solo this year

Always had best clothes or new clothes growing up, but last few years it's been Christmas jumpers. Quite fancy posh frocks this year, though I am sure dh will wear his Christmas starwars I am your father Christmas tshirt. (I despair :))

Our wine/beer/cider making always ends up in the study, but it's a pain there too.

Hellohohoho everyone!

I do love a bit of ponce esp at Chrimbo, but never get as much done as I would like. Am going to try the Christmas Cards and Christmas Jumper bunting mentioned earlier on and am planning on making SIL a scarf so need to get that sorted out too.

Really fancy making my own Xmas pud, I absolutely love the stuff! Does anyone have any good recipes? The boozier the better, tis the season after all

Rowboat those figurines sound incredible! Imagine what a fabulous heirloom they'll become. Is fimo difficult to use? I've never tried it because I have an erratic oven and couldn't be sure of the temperature ranges.
Pretty please would you share the recipe for toffee apple cider sounds like something Dh would love.

I got most of my Santa stash wrapped and hidden away. I don't wrap the soft toys because they look cute peeping out the top of the stocking but I've put them into paper bags with cinnamon and cloves so they'll smell convincingly of Santa's workshop on Christmas morning.

I need to make a new reindeer hoof print template. ever since the kids started putting out that blasted reindeer food in the garden they fly down off the roof and leave the garden in an awful state.

Has anyone spotted bargainous white fake fur or velvet? I want to make a tree skirt but can only find £££ throws and animal print fur in th raft shops I've tried.

Amy you make your soft toys smell of cinnamon! Stealing this. Maybe for me. And all my things.

I've found my home!!!

A few years ago I made tons of felt tree decorations so the DTs didn't ruin my pretty ones and we add a few more every year. They can pick the design this year now they are 4 lol.

I am impressed with the advent tree. I've just bought a wooden one along with some decoupage stuff from hobbycraft so that should keep me busy for a while, oh and also a wooden star and little sleigh that need decorating too.

DH has made some blackberry wine and just bottled it. He is now making elderflower wine which should be ready in time for christmas.

I have just made Ginger and grapefruit gin and going to make some raspberry and mint gin as soon as DH gets home with my mint! So i think we are sorted for christmas booze though i am temped by the christmas spiced liquor and might give that a go as there is a fair few bottles of vodka in the cupboard.

It's not Christmassy, but I'm just about to make an autumn wreath with DD. I'll post a picture when it's done. Unless it goes horribly wrong.

wheatchief I have recipe book with instructions for miniature Christmas cakes. The mixture for an 8" cake will make four 4" cakes and it recommends cooking them for 90-120 minutes at 140 deg C, 275 deg F or gas mark 1.

I cook my small cakes in tiny springform tins that I bought in Tesco - I just line them with double/triple brown paper and make sure that it sticks up a fair bit. I check mine every 10 minutes or so after an hour.

I usually make mine once the DC go back after half term and soak the fruit for a fortnight beforehand.

I have a question!
Can you be poncetastic with children and if so, how?
Any tips/ideas for some junior poncing?
😀

But...we don't like Xmas cake (pils had it as a gift) and I'm a bit bored of paper chains!
I'm hoping to take them shopping over half term and could maybe find some crafty shop?

How old are your DC Badders?

Pompon wreath in tasteful colours to match your Christmas decor

Stamping rolls of brown wrapping paper with Christmas stamps to make unique wrapping paper. You can then use this in advanced poncing - finish the wrapped gifts off with real ribbon bows, hand stamped gift cards and little jingle bells. The Works or The Range are your best bet for stamps and inks.

Gingerbread house (buy a kit )

I bought a set of star biscuit cutters in Wilko when mine were small and made stacks of iced shortbread stars that looked like Christmas trees. DS loved doing that.

Salt dough decorations? Christmas cards made from hand or foot prints?

What an amazing idea to make the toys smell of Santa's workshop Amy!Stealing that! :)
Yeah, if I remember, Fimo is pretty easy but it'll take while I think!

Right, found the Toffee Apple Cider recipe.
350 g honey
4.5 l organic pressed apple juice
1 tin pear halves in juice, blended
1 tsp each of malic acid, champagne yeast and yeast nutrient.

1. Boil clear honey til 'burnt' . Don't rapid boil but simmer for 10-20 mins
2. Once boiled, add 750 ml of apple juice and warm up for 2 minutes to allow any 'crusty' cooled honey to melt back into broth.
3. Add pears and rest of apple juice.
4. Allow to properly cool
5. Decant to sterilised demijohns
6. Add yeast, malic acid and nutrient.
7. Add air lock and leave for about a month.
8. Decanted into sterilised 'grolsch'/kilner type bottles. If you want sparkling add half tsp sugar, if you want still leave the sugar out.
9. Leave another month or so.

10. Drink lots :)

Oh sorry - should have said, Ds1 and 2 are 13 and 8
It's more for ds2 I'm thinking....
Although ds1 did enjoy making a Tudor boars head Marchpane last year! :)

I like the idea of a wreath

Last year DS got some evergreen leaves and wrote people's names on in gold pen for place settings.
Looked great and easy for kids Badders

We also collect some greenery and make centre piece for table or garland for mantel piece. Depending on age of kids of course but they can add fruit, ribbons etc

9 year old DD did a lot of the work for my new autumn wreath...