Poncetastic Christmas 2014

[HopeAndStories]

(Posting FellatioNelson's OP from previous years )
_

OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom. A bit like the war in Afghanistan, only with nicer food and sparkly shoes.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobsworth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapes and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessies' on the packet, this is not the thread for you.

I've had a truly poncetastic shopping spree this morning, PIL are coming to stay for two nights this Christmas and I realised that means they'll be here when the DC have their Christmas pjs delivered by the elves...

So I decided that means PIL needed to have beautiful tapestry stockings to hang with ours and bone China christmas mugs from the elves

So... stocking fillers for them now.. I probably need someone to stop me at some point- but not before I've sourced old white ice skates to go on a fresh garland on the garage!

My name is AllThatGlistens and I have a Pinterest addiction

I haven't got a picture of it with the decorations on it, will post one later in the year though!

Made my Christmas cake this afternoon!

My favourite thread, thanks for starting it!

I'm going to pull out all my Christmas books and Cath Kidston planner next weekend.

I got Sarah Raven's book last year but didn't end up doing anything from it (too faithful to old Nigella's); this year I've decided to try her Peppermint Creams and Turkish Delight.

Trying a Christmas pudding in the slow cooker this year too.

In the meantime, I'm looking for inspiration for wrapping themes and Christmas cards.

I've done the whole brown paper with silver bells, then with cinnamon sticks and holly, with paper snowflakes/dollies and with silk bows. Also did newspapers with beautiful gigantic ribbons.

Have toyed with the idea of trying Furoshiki the Japanese art of wrapping with cloth, but not feeling brave enough. Any ideas?

TheWoolly do you have the link for the Chocolate Chestnut Torte please? I found a couple of different ones online. Thanks!

Ooh Poppy, you've just reminded me that I have Nigella's book somewhere too.

I've been looking for a new planner as I can't find my CK one. Does anyone have any recommendations? (don't want to get another CK one in case I find it!)

Poppy It's this one. I'm looking for a Christmas cake stand to serve it on - although for maximum ponce I should make my own from a vintage christmas plate and tea cup

For those posters looking for tree skirts I searched on Pinterest and found loads of inspiration - there is a no sew one made from burlap (hessian?) and sequin fabric that looks stunning.

I have to ponce by stealth as DH is set in his ways - but he does admit it looks nice when it's done. He had a bit of a funny turn when I hid the tinsel a couple of years ago.
Food poncery = good
Decor poncery = little by little, year on year

Does anyone have any ideas for a chocolate bark other than peppermint? I did that last year, and although I plan to make it again, a variation would be nice....

Hello all! Hoping to have a slightly more poncetastic Christmas than usual this year, although probably won't be make many gifts by hand.

I am on the lookout for a very nice nativity set if anyone knows of one. Quite like this one but pricey! Looking for eternally stylish, not realistic, will look good in my house which none of you have seen. Pretty easy brief for you lot, I reckon.

Orangette, whose peppermint bark recipe is deservedly popular, also has a recipe for almond bark, which is probably very nice if, unlike me, you don't have a nut allergy.

Ha yes woolyback, the stealth ponce approach is best I find :o
Where DH is concerned food ponciness is acceptable and in most ways desirable. For decorations, he just stands looking slightly bemused and murmuring about tinsel and coloured lights

JustaPhase have you seen the Willow Tree Nativity? It comes in three parts - Holy Family, Shepherd and Animals and Three Kings. There is also a stable to buy. The whole shebang will set you back £300+

Gorgeous though - I love stylised statues.

ItIsntJustAPhase not sure if this is too childish for you, but I'm going to make this nativity this year, but keeping all the outfits to hessian and white muslin in the style of Willow Tree.

little-inspirations.blogspot.co.uk/2011/11/wooden-doll-nativity.html?m=1

Unless I've misread your post and you're looking for something more pricey in which case

Also, anyone looking for an easy no-sew tree skirt - I like the look of this one

cleverlyinspired.com/2012/11/kraft-paper-tree-skirt/

Plus you could probably change the paper/filling to fit your theme

It was me that read JustaPhase's post wrongly.

Is this nativity set more in budget?

I have read this all whilst having a sleepless night and really enjoyed it. I am probably totally unrealistic because I started a thread last week how do I manage my time now working full time but I like a challenge

After reading some of the lovely things and also very sad things on here I am determined to give it go.
So some questions if you don't mind
Where is the best place to get fabric?
Is my very dodgy sewing ok or do I need a machine?
Can I have some very easy decoration ideas to do with the children?
Hamper ideas and where do you get baskets????
Want to make little present cakes. Do I need to buy lots of little tins?
Where do I get glue gun?

Thank you I am very excited. We have lots of horrible things happening so determined to bring some light. I am useless at this stuff so if it turns out ok ish I will be delighted.

TwoNoisyBoys my Mum makes some with toffee popcorn in and it's so nice. I wasn't convinced at first but then she forced me to try some and it was glorious. Kids love it too!

Scoob where in the country do you live? Do you have a market close by that would have any fabric stalls? I am lucky to live in Leeds as the market here is fab and there's loads of fabric/haberdashery stalls which are cheap. I bought my baskets the first year from eBay in bulk as it was the cheapest place, but last year I got some from The Range which were fabric lined for around £2 each. You can buy little cake boxes in the pound shop

Oooh, Woollyback you have raised the bar now! I I've the Willow Tree ones but I actually also like the eBay one you posted.

I do like the one you posted too MyMummyRuns but I think I want something that is definitely NOT for the children but MINE ALL MINE.

I will have a think. Lovely to have choices, thank you.

I like your thinking ItsJustAPhase

Scoobdoob the DC and I made and painted salt dough decorations last year which was messy but turned out well in a rustic kind of way! We also made these stained glass window biscuits which can either be eaten or hung on the tree

life.wilko.com/5-weeks-to-go-make-your-own-edible-christmas-decorations/

Oh blast - I have bought blueberries instead of cranberries by accident. By the bucketload. I live in Spain, and checked in the dictionary in preparation, but as it turns out, the word is the same for both blueberries and cranberries. DH pointed out that he hadn't expected them to be blue, but I suggested perhaps they weren't quite ripe yet.

Blueberries are a summer fruit! I can't be making blueberry and pistachio biscotti, blueberry and chicken Christmas pie, blueberry vodka for my Christmas cocktails...

scoob I can answer a couple of questions...

• Is my sewing ok - it depends what you are making? Have you tried Bondaweb - it is the best thing since sliced bread. I have made masses of bunting with no sewing whatsoever. You can also type "no sew Christmas tree skirt" (as an example) into Pinterest for ideas.

- individual cake tins - I find it best to make a big cake and then use a cookie cutter in the desired dimensions to cut out mini cakes. This way the cakes are beautifully evenly shaped and evenly cooked throughout.

• hamper ideas - perhaps choose a theme and work around it. So a 'cheese lovers hamper' or a 'film night hamper.' My brother is having a 'coffee hamper' this year full of homemade coffee syrups, the pods for his machine, long latte spoons, the stencils for making pretty patterns in the foam, homemade biscotti and a mug (hopefully) decorated by DS, but he is still very small so maybe just a photo mug of the two of them!
• decoration ideas to do with the children - woodland walks! Collect pinecones, acorns, sprigs of fern etc. Spray paint or dip in white paint. Arrange artfully around a bent-into-a-circle coathanger to make a wreath, or tie with tartan or glittery ribbon. Make stencils and spray paint a cheap dormat with a Christmassy message to have for December to make everyone smile when they enter your home. Obviously the paper snowflakes to stick to the windows. Buy cheap wooden photo frames and tiny christmas decoration bits/paint (hobbycraft?) and get them to make presents for family members. Hobbycraft for the gluegun maybe... Potato printing on brown parcel paper to make wrapping paper. Also, if you pinterest "christmas handprint craft" you will find a range of fun ideas!

Sorry for the essay!

Has anyone ever done any mantel or stair garlands with fresh ivy? I have loads in my garden.

oh my, I think I have found my new home.
You are all my new best friends!
yipppeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Ooh, marking place! :) I'm hoping to get a lot of my Christmas shopping done by the start of October so that I can focus on decoration, DD's presents, and all things poncetastical

I had no idea that my Christmas tree needed a skirt!

I'm hopefully making greenish tomato chutney this afternoon. There weren't enough green tomatoes left on my plants so I'm making up the quantity with some red ones from the supermarket.

I made the Mars Bar Vodka a few days ago(right after reading about it). We didin't use all the vodka because it seemed REALLY strong. Anyway DH and DD loved it, I thought it was OK, the next evening DD tasted it again and made me have some....it is lovely, it just needed time to chill and for the flavours to develop. I will definitely make this as a gift for people I really like.
We added more cream than it suggested though.