Ahem. It's the 25th September, which means....

[FellatioNelson]

That I hereby declare the Fellatio's Poncetastic Christmas Thread Part 4 open for business.

For those of you who do not know WTF I am on about, read this from 2010 by way of explanation:

OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom. A bit like the war in Afghanistan, only with nicer food and sparkly shoes.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobsworth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapes and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessies' on the packet, this is not the thread for you.

If you want to read the previous three threads for Christmas 2010, 2011 and 2012 search my name in the Christmas topic.

In the words of the great Mike Reid from Runaround, G-G-G-G-G- GO!

If you google Nigella's chilli jam it will come up on her website, the recipe is for red but if you swap the peppers and chillies for green it's the same quantities etc.

I left a day in between in the fridge so it was 100% set! it goes really 'set' so they layer nicely and stay layered.

If I could find enough yellow chillies I would have done a yellow layer but 150g chillies is actually quite a lot and they don't sell yellow ones in the shop around here.

It's a very easy recipe.

Brilliant, thank you :) I was doing Nigella's chill jam anyway but I never thought to do green/yellow. Fab idea.

Thanks Ethelb - I am going to make them - I'll post ASAP on how to make. It's in a nice Xmas mag out at the mo - Xmas makes its called.
They also have glass jars with floating candles, rosemary and berries which look lovely.

The green isn't as vibrant as the red because the colour is lost more in cooking but it looks lovely contrasted against the red.

I'm off to home bargains to get some hamper baskets this weekend.
I'm going to do Lemon Marmalade during this week too if I can.

I made some marmalade and blueberry jam with the dc today - not as marvellous as some of your recipes sound, but I am merely an apprentice poncer in my first year of poncing.

I am already running out of my stash of glass jars, and I have raspberries in the freezer to make more jam this weekend. Where is the best place to buy jars from?

I have all the jars, DP sent a pallet of them to my house a couple of years ago. I'm finally down to my last 30

Ladies, I have 2 buffets to make this year, I have a reputation of chief buffet maker-er in this family, I need it to be amazing.

Tell me what's your ultimate buffet piece please?

Coronation chicken every time. Or a really yummy quiche. Or an unusual salad. I LOVE a buffet!

Delia's sausage rolls and warm potato salad are winners here.

I always do a really big ham in the middle of the table with cloves etc studded on the outside, I just think it's so festive! Or salmon for the veggies........

If you're looking for cheap jars, we bought criminally cheap curry sauce from Sainsbury's one year just for the jars. Dumped the curry sauce and ran the jars through the dishwasher

Asda have these or I think these are the ones we bought from Sainsburys.

Vegetarians don't eat salmon.

I will do a ham/gammon and breads/cheese/olives etc. I need a few good dips for crudités and some other hand held nibble bits for 7 children and 7 adults.

Thanks for the jar tip eggdip .

I, too, would steer away from salmon as a veggie option. Because it isn't veggie (obviously unless you are catering for a pescarian).

For buffets I do Delia's cold chicken pie.

Everyone loves Christmas Pie on a buffet

I make it every year for the boxing day buffet.

Favourite buffet food: Delia's devilled chicken drumsticks

Goat cheese, red onion and thyme vol au vents. I just want to supersize these

All lovely, thank you. :)

Today I've made Lemon Marmalade and Honey, ginger and Lemon Marmalade. :)

Just chutney and the pickled onions and gherkins to do now and I'm all jarred out.

Apologies to the veggies for salmon - I only know one & she eats it !
My Christmas organiser has come but it's so nice & shiny I don't want to write in it.........will be unearthing all of the jars I've been saving tonight to do some chutneys & jams over the weekend - v excited!

A handy one to add to buffets is nigellas loaded potato skins. You can make a full tray and then freeze ahead. A dressed salmon does look pretty on a table too

Ooh - any chance of the honey, ginger and lemon marmalade, Titsalina? I can think of a lot of uses for that...

Anyone got any ideas for blueberries? I have a lot frozen and I really need the freezer space.

Has anyone made Sarah Ravens Christmas cake? I usually do Delia but fancy a change this Christmas, and her book just arrived and is brilliant! Lovely poncy recipes and unrealistic flower arranging ideas. Great.

Am going to be organised and make things this year. Not a pudding though because that's such an arse. E.g. SR Mincemeat with cobnuts & damsons, if I can get any cobnuts. And damsons. And maybe the Christmas rownanberry jelly.

I spent a very pleasant half an hour this morning in Liberty's Christmas department. Very pleasant. Most of the decorations are Gisela Graham but I don't think have seen such a large collection anywhere else and all colour coordinated by theme. Very nice wrapping paper too. Managed to walk out of there £68 lighter - and I only went in for a look!

Anne I made a batch of this jam last weekend, 'tis very nice.

Of course, it's here

As a tip (although don't tell anyone because I'll be evicted from the thread) if you go to Lakeland and buy the cans of fruit for Marmalade making you can get the lemon one and add 2 chunks of frozen ginger (or fresh grated) and a couple of tbsp honey, it works brilliantly.

Tonight it's a toss up between making Cranberry and Apple chutney or painting the bathroom...