Intimate hygiene in girls

[cleanandfresh]

Yeah I know crap title and I apologise in advance for "twee" terms BUT I am genuinely a bit confused about cleaning my little girl's "bits" (and I am calling them bits for brevity's sake rather than getting into labia major and minoria etc...)

So my girl is nearly 3 and she has a bath before bedtime most nights (except Fridays). I know that soap is not a good thing for the intimate regions so I don't get her to soap there but do remind her to "swish her twinkle" (yeah shoot me!) along with swishing her tummy and legs etc.

I have noticed these past few days that she has white, creamy deposits in the folds and around the top of her clitoral hood and wondered whether I should be trying to wash these away. She's been ferreting around this area occasionally and has said "look it's creamy" but it doesn't seem to bother her. The other day she was pretending to be a baby and have her nappy changed so I took the opportunity to get some cotton wool and try to really clean in this area but she really didn't like me doing it and I must admit it didn't feel right.

I guess I worry about thrush but I don't think it is and then I worry about messing about where I should just leave well alone. But then I worry about being too coy and maybe I should be actively encouraging her to "clean" there a bit more. I know on Mumsnet there is a small sector that think any female scent or secretions should be disinfected away and I don't want to fall into that trap - but I do want to keep my daughter healthy and instill a healthy, positive attitude towards her genitalia. I always use the words beautiful and fresh in relation to her body as in my own childhood I was very much given a negative impression of that area of my body.

Mothers of girls please help me out here

cleanandfresh I understand your urge to defend yourself, but I really do think that it's time to just leave this lot to their own rather pathetic devices. Their lives must be mighty dull for them to chase after the tiniest possibility of a scandal so arduously. They're really not worth your time imo.

and mathanxiety, it's probably because you are calling decent mners paedophiles. that sort of thing pisses me right off, i can't imagine how i would feel if it was me being attacked like this, i would be beyond furious.

mathanxiety do you read? At all? Ever? Get a life!

lol, yes, and that too thelibster.

i dont own a childcare book either.

sometimes i feel like i am cleaning dd4 too much iyswim. due to her allegies she often has loose stools, and its gets into all creases and folds. i feel so sorry for her and try to be gentle with her. would hate for anyone to think i was a paedo if i asked how to clean her better iyswim.

x-post with the get a life. i'm not saying that. but i am surprised at some of the trollhunters being imo usually sensible and non-hysterical women.

Right mathanxiety I couldn't let your post pass. So, I am not allowed to ask a question on Mumsnet that I could safely find the answer to in a childcare book? That's priceless. And I am "continuing to harp on about the matter" am I? Maybe it's because I feel personally affronted at being called a troll/pervert and want to defend myself and ALL THE OTHER POSTERS who might have deigned to ask such a question under a namechange.

OK I really really really didn't want to have to reveal myself to anyone but I do want to clear myself here and exonerate myself and the posters who have kindly defended my right to broach this subject in the way that I have (anonymously and using "scientific" words).

Leave it with me, just thinking about the best way to do it without dragging someone else into it who might not want to get embroiled in a hoo ha.

OP - worry not about being called weird or odd or whatever.

Thar some people read your posts in the way they have speakes VOLUMES about where their heads are at.

I agree with Aitch.

OP, please don't let this get to you, it's a question I could have easily asked.

Bugger - the poster I want to Facebook isn't on FB at the moment but is evidently on their computer because they just recently posted on this thread. Going to wait to see if they log on in the next 5 minutes and then I'll leave it.

did not strike me as trollish, and i haven't read more than the most recent page, and here is my advice: as the mother of 3 girls I have read/heard over the years that that area is self cleaning; all you need to do is "swish". dont over do things as it can upset the natural balance of good bacteria, that kind of thing. sorry if anyone on here has made you feel bad, it happens.

Aitch that last post was just me venting at mathanxety's remarks about the OP not letting the matter go. As far as I can see, the original post was brought to a close by her on page 6! Since when all the "toing and froing" has been almost exclusively concerned with whether or not the OP was for real and has been led by the troll hunter brigade!

Limez, very good point!

Oh dear, I think people are getting rather het up about this.

When I was accused of being a troll I just took it on the chin because I had namechanged to tell a rather unusual story. I could have outed myself to prove my credentials but chose to remain anonymous.

I knew I wasn't lying and most people on the thread believed me. I wasn't going to worry about why others didn't believe - infact I could quite understand why some of them did not!

There is no "high-fiving" going on amongst the "troll hunters".

Christ, just use soap. Something tells me that you struggle in life generally if this is a serious dilemma for you.

THAT is the fucking dizzy limit, namey, i absolutely FURIOUS now.

one should just take being called a child abuser on the chin, should one? fuck that for a game of soldiers.

and see why she would need to ask? half-term hero's just advised her to give her kid thrush. but, yah know... better not to ask in case some nosey bint wants to brand you a paedophile.

Cleanandfresh, dh & I had a discussion similarly re dd who had whitish discharge when she was about 3 and pre puberty I wasn't sure what was normal. We initially left it, but she then got a bit itchy, so dh took her to see the GP. GP prescribed canesten twice but it still persisted so had to have a swab, it was an infection, probably from her not wiping front-to-back at nursery, and had antibiotics to clear it up.

Obviously haven't felt the need to namechange

Seriously aitch, you have lost the plot if you think that soap is a one way ticket to thrushsville. SOAP IS SAFE, PEOPLE! Nah, it does not matter how loud I shout it, it ain't gonna make the front pages........lol

Try and be calm Aitch? They're so not worth it. I have never come across such a bunch of smug, self satisfied... No, I've been too well brought up. at self!(Wanders into troll hunter gathering and proffers bowl, " anyone?")

you do see the point, though, don't you? surely to god you can see the point? loads of posters have just advised the opposite, so you coming on and definitively advising to use soap, while insulting the OP, is just more proof that it's an entirely valid question.

Think you may be over-involved Aitch if you are now furious.

Was just suggesting that the op could maybe try to understand why she has caused the reaction she has. Mathanxiety's long post was in response to someone who asked why she didn't take the op at face value.

Why should op worry, though? She has 80%, 90%? posters on this thread who are 100% behind her.

I am not going to take umbrage at comments like this:

"Thar some people read your posts in the way they have speakes VOLUMES about where their heads are at."

I have things more in perspective when it comes to posting on the www, perhaps.

I really am surprised by this -- it's gone from a bit unpleasant to full-on batshit over the course of today. Totally agree w Aitch that posters I normally feel to be utterly reasonable are seemingly BVU here.

OP, please don't feel you have to own up your usual posting name because of all this, if you don't want to.

I just don't get why people don't just report and stay away if they suspect a troll. if you think it's a troll, why feed it? I said as much earlier. Others have said it too. Nobody who doubts the op has answered. Troll hunting is never a good idea and MN doesn't actually allow it, right?

I can see that it's harder to hold back from calling troll on a drunken Friday night but on a sober Saturday surely we can show a bit of restraint?

P.S. both dd and I use femfresh, it never causes any irritation at all .

My honest reaction to reading the op was 'jesus, your child is 3 and you don't know how to care for her? Fuck.'

Get to a GP or your health visitor if common sense and life experience leaves you with unanswered questions pertaining to your child's well being.