Intimate hygiene in girls

[cleanandfresh]

Yeah I know crap title and I apologise in advance for "twee" terms BUT I am genuinely a bit confused about cleaning my little girl's "bits" (and I am calling them bits for brevity's sake rather than getting into labia major and minoria etc...)

So my girl is nearly 3 and she has a bath before bedtime most nights (except Fridays). I know that soap is not a good thing for the intimate regions so I don't get her to soap there but do remind her to "swish her twinkle" (yeah shoot me!) along with swishing her tummy and legs etc.

I have noticed these past few days that she has white, creamy deposits in the folds and around the top of her clitoral hood and wondered whether I should be trying to wash these away. She's been ferreting around this area occasionally and has said "look it's creamy" but it doesn't seem to bother her. The other day she was pretending to be a baby and have her nappy changed so I took the opportunity to get some cotton wool and try to really clean in this area but she really didn't like me doing it and I must admit it didn't feel right.

I guess I worry about thrush but I don't think it is and then I worry about messing about where I should just leave well alone. But then I worry about being too coy and maybe I should be actively encouraging her to "clean" there a bit more. I know on Mumsnet there is a small sector that think any female scent or secretions should be disinfected away and I don't want to fall into that trap - but I do want to keep my daughter healthy and instill a healthy, positive attitude towards her genitalia. I always use the words beautiful and fresh in relation to her body as in my own childhood I was very much given a negative impression of that area of my body.

Mothers of girls please help me out here

Aithch I do understand your reaction but if we consider the facts:

1. To soap or not? Whilst it's true that many females use soap with no ill effects, some react very badly to it and as soap is not actually necessary, probably best avoid it to be on the safe side. 2)Many of the troll hunters are whining "Why don't you just take her to the dr/HV if you're for real? Why post on here? Well, we've already realised that HVs and even some doctors are not all they are cracked up to be, evidence the STUPID and potentially really harmful advice I was given regarding my DS
2. I've looked on the web and the OP is right, there is very little that is helpful in this regard, much less advice than for boys.
3. Your point about 3 being just the age for this sort of question to arise as just coming out of nappies etc. Also the age at which we enter the minefield of teaching children that this area is "private" and not to be touched by others and discouraging them from "fiddling" in public whilst NOT giving them the message that exploring their bodies is "wrong" or "dirty" is a veritable minefield imo
4. The point made that the vast majority on this thread think that the question (given 1 - 3 above) is a perfectly reasonable one shows that it is the minority who have the "ishoos" and are to be pitied rather than anything else.
   They are pathetic in their desperate search for the shocking and we shouldn't be validating their position by taking it seriously.

Can't believe this is still going.

I don't understand the 'if you wash yourself you must know' stance people have. My bits are totally different to my DDs bits.

I've never heard of this 'no soap down there' thing. I was my bits with Carex anti-bac hand wash.
I don't know why, its just the stuff that leaves me feeling cleanest. My DD just swishes in the bath with some top to tail in there.

I use a very gentle soap called Lactacyd (on the recommendation of my MiL!), which has no perfume or anything and is supposedly the right phd. It also washes off very easily. I find I don't get thrush when using it. We bring it over from Scandinavia where it's cheaper, but you can get it in Boots.

Have only boys at the moment, but if had a daughter would also wonder about this, and would probably teach her to wash with some sort of gentle soap/other wash.

Really don't see why people think this was a strange question.

?

yes please.

Still waiting to see why my thread which mentions labia and stuff was okay, and this OP is labelled a perve? Anyone?

OKAY.

we have some breaking news, trollhunters et al.

i now know who cleanandfresh is and she most definitely is neither a troll, a child abuser nor a neglectful mother.

i bet she wishes that she had just waited to ask me about this when we meet up for coffee next week... how's wednesday suit, cleany? (btw shit name, that.)

but seriously, this has been an eye-opener, folks. a big one. never again will i assume that MN is populated by women who are too smart to get into a paedo-panic. you should all be sick to your stomachs with shame.

Ah, fatal mistake Aitch.
MN appears to currently be populated by 50% woman who are too smart, 10% troll hunters and 30% easily led.

The other 10% are matthew wright's researchers lurking

Thelibster - if you honestly think that a health concern re a young child does not necessitate a visit to the GP or at the very least a chat with your heal visitor then you are pitiful in, IMO.

I haven't read all the posts, just the fist page, but I would just encourage her to wash with a flannel when in the bath. It's no biggie.

tumbleweed**

Aitch Hooray! Now let's see if the troll hunters shut up. Not holding my breath here Give cleanandfresh a very unMNer hug from me. Wish I could buy you both that coffee!

you cannot go to the GP everytime you have a minor health worry !!! surely as parents, you;'d never be away from the place. what a terrible thing to say.. how arrogant to state that. there have been plenty of times i've asked on MN, googled or called a friend/parent re a concern about teh DCs before going to the docs.

Aithc, i fear your statment will be lost amongst all the peeeeedo hysteria

Clicked on this thread because I was interested to read responses, being the mother of a 2 year old girl myself.

Unbelievable responses. I have been on MN, mainly lurking, since I was pg and have never seen anything like this. Really - this is a bit like the Brass Eye Paedo special.

Sorry lulu, if my child had discharge that was possibly bothering her and I had no idea how one might keep a child clean I would seek professional help.

HalfTerm - why on earth would she take her dd to the dr? From what she's saying it sounds like the small amount of 'build up' you get on young girls sometimes when they've been having baths and a swish with a flannel etc but not been actively pulling bits apart to deep clean.

You're told by nct/hv etc not to pull all the bits apart but just to clean the outside with warm water so no wonder OP probably was a bit confused.

Seemed a totally normal question to me, but then perhaps I'm a 'paedo' too

Yeah yeah I've already fessed up to it being a shit name Aitch

Coffee is a damn fine idea.

well good for you halftermhero. that's your choice

other people may ask friends or family first, to see what they think, rather than bothering a GP with something tat might be perfectly normal

or, given that MN is right here and it's a saturday night, they might ask here.
what's wrong with that?

who is MN though?Posters may well sound convincing but who the fuck are they? A genuine concern re health would see the sensible seeking a qualified opinion.

HalfTermHero I used to think just that but some other MNers have opened my eyes on here and cleanandfresh is clearly much wiser than me, or you for that matter. I hope I'm open to re-think and admitting I am/was wrong. (See previous posts) but I'm confident I'm right in one regard, some just don't read before piling in with their knee-jerk accusations. (Shakes head in disbelief at some people's attitudes)

Thelibster - thanks - I might make mine a gin and tonic on reflection!

oh, and ARE you american, c&f? you certainly don't sound it. nor do you look like a chap (although i have said you should consider having a wee go at those eyebrows... )

who are MN? a bunch of mums for a start, who may have experienced the same thing and have some advice

i shall expect to see you on ALL threads in the health section from now on then halftermhero, telling people NOT to post on MN but to get to the doctor.

you're going to be quite busy... there are plenty you haven't replied to yet.

I stated clearly that I did not think that op was a troll. Hunting is not my style . I hope that op gets qualified advice that she is comfortable with. If dd needs treatment then I hope she gets it. If op is advised that the little girl might benefit from cleansing with a mild, simple soap then I hope she gets that too.