Leaving money to nieces and nephews - MNers without children forum

[KimberleyClark]

There’s a thread in progress on this topic. Was just wondering how many of you have siblings that are expecting their children to inherit from you? My sibling has told me not to leave anything to DN but I suspect he may be unusual in this.

Expecting?! I have no idea, I doubt it's something we'll ever discuss.

My childless siblings are leaving to our kids. We have a copy of one of the wills.

My kids and siblings are pretty close though so it seems natural for this to happen.

DH and I don’t have children but are likely (excluding obvious unknowns such as care fees) to end up with a fairly decent estate. Assuming we live similar lifespans to our siblings, the majority will be left to nieces and nephews, with some gifts to god children and a decent sum to small local charities.

I've no idea what siblings are expecting, but if it's coming into an inheritance from me they'll be disappointed. Eldest DB cut off contact years ago, and altho we're back in touch I've never met his DC, plus they come from a wealthy family on DM's side. Younger DB has one DC who is grown up, and any money to that DB would probably go to his step children - who also come from money.

DH & I are childless and fully expect to spend most of our money on care & support in old age. DN will likely have a substantial inheritance from both sets of grandparents & my sister & BIL.

There are no children in my family. My SIL has nieces / nephews. I expect that is where my DBro's money will end up (and care fees allowing it will be a decent chunk). I don't really know these kids so amn't minded to leave them money.

I do however have lots of friends' kids I'm close to and fulfilling a surrogate aunt role for.

I need to change my will I think to redirect my money (assuming I have any left when I die) away from my siblings who are no longer in need of it. I don't really want to fund a newer sports car for DBro (we get on, but he has plenty of his own cash) but instead send it down the line where it could potentially help secure housing or further education.

The major barrier to doing this is that I have no idea how to do it fairly without causing upset. For some of the kids I'm close to it would make a huge difference, for others it will be a drop in the ocean as there is so much family money heading their way but I don' t want to pick and choose recipients/ alter the division as so often inherited money is equated with love and I love them all equally.

I’m estranged from my parents so my siblings will get a bigger share of any inheritance (parents are very wealthy). I know my parents expect me to leave all of my money to the family children as they told me that’s what families do and if I don’t have any kids then I have nobody else to leave money. I don’t know how my siblings feel but I imagine that expectation may be theirs as well.

I will be splitting any money I have between friends who I consider family, the family children and charities. Though I can’t imagine having much money by the time I get there, what with state pension age constantly rising and the state of the world etc.

That one has really pissed me off. Probably because my brothers and one of my sisters all assume I'm leaving them/their kids my money. They have never bothered to have a relationship with me. They supported out mother in bullying me. They refused to help me move house when my marriage imploded in the middle of my own cancer treatment and have just been generally selfish arseholes my entire life.

Hmm. Might have touched a nerve. But I hate this assumption that childless relatives have some kind of duty to continually put their hand in their pocket for faaaamily. Fuck that.

I hate this assumption that childless relatives have some kind of duty to continually put their hand in their pocket for faaaamily. Fuck that...

Agree with this.

DH and I have no children, but quite a few nieces and nephews. Their parents have never asked us for money and are unaware that, once we both die, anything left will be split between our nieces and nephews. We’re happy with this but would probably feel differently if we were being pressured!

I recently made my first will. I plan to spend my money on my retirement but if I should die early it will go to my sibling for his children. They know this as I asked if I should leave it to the sibling or to the currently very young DNs. It's entirely my decision - sibling was not expecting it. And hopefully I will have spent it on my long life anyway.

My childless siblings causually mentioned anything they leave will go to their 10 nieces/nephews/god children, but their plan was to spend as much of it as possible before they pop off so don't expect much 🤣

i appreciated the thought while also hoping they get to spend as much as they can!

Mine will be going to charity. Won't have anything anyway so a moot point.

I've no idea what either of my siblings 'expect', it's not a conversation we've had. I imagine they imagine at least a token amount.

Currently I don't have a will so my surviving parent gets it all (except my death in service benefit which is 50% parent and 50% nephews & nieces). My parent will have to take on my pets so they'll earn it 🤣

Assuming my surviving parent dies before I do then my will will firstly ensure my pets can be cared for and secondly divvy the rest between nieces & nephews (held in trust until they are 25 if necessary).

Obviously my own life and care come first so there may not be much...

My child free uncle just died suddenly younger than expected and has left a few thousand to each of his nieces and nephews which I had never thought about before (and wouldn't think he'd have big savings/he didn't own property) but it's so appreciated and will really help me to provide for my son and save up for a bigger home for us one day

Good for them!

MN: "no one owes you anything. its fine to write your siblings/their children out of the will. Do what you want!"

Also MN: " no you CANNOT leave more money to one child than another even when they is strong sensible rational. You CANNOT do what you want! It's not fair/right!"

My childless sibling is leaving me their entire estate.

Until i had a DH my sibling was my sole beneficiary.
Then when i married my sibling and DH were joint beneficiaries.
Now i have a DH and children, my DH and children are beneficiaries and my sibling receives a fixed amount (£20k)

Unless you are NC, you hate each other or your sibling is a multimillionaire i think its bizarre to leave it to charity

A close spinster friend is planning to leave her property and savings to her nieces and nephews. Tbh I find it rather sad. They never contact her to ask how she is, rarely thank her for the birthday and Christmas gifts she generously gives them and never visit her .
I think she should spend what she can on herself , leave some for possible care support in her older years and then donate the rest to charity.

Apart from a cash legacy to the cat rescue I volunteer for and some items I want to go to friends, I’m leaving whatever’s left half & half between my niece & nephew. They’re lovely kids & I’m happy with that.

Yes I'll leave all of mine to my neices/nephews. I once met a girl who inherited a house from her uncle when she was 19 and she was sorted for life. I love the thought of being able to do something like that for my family on top of what they'll inherit off their parents.

Unless you are NC, you hate each other or your sibling is a multimillionaire i think its bizarre to leave it to charity

Like I said, I have a niece and nephew who come from money and who I've never met. I have a nephew the other side of the world who feels no need to keep in touch. Where exactly is my financial obligation to them?

My will divides everything five ways between three of my friends and my two nieces. The friends will need the money more than the nieces, but I didn't like to leave them out completely....

Sad for her that her nieces and nephews don’t contact her and her close friend calls her a spinster. I hope she has some nice people in her life.

Absolute nothing.
My sibling's child is the only child on that side of the family, SIL is (sadly) the only child and all GPs (outlr parents) own properties, hers of significant value. My nephew will be probably the richest peson in generations just from inheritance from their parents. If anything, I should be getting help 😂

And even if not it's simply not expected at all. It wasn't ever mentioned even. It may be because we keep to intestacy law rather than random wills more (eg you can't leave out child from inheritance unless it falls into the prescribed allowed reasons)

I am spending whatever I have, planning to die penniless basically with nice view from Dignitas, and with 4 lifetimes of experiences stuffed into one. Whatever is left, good luck getting it from whatever country I will be in at the time😶

I haven't got a penny to give, but if I did, I would leave it
to them in a heartbeat. They are my reasons for living