Worst comment you've had as a child free woman

[derekdied]

I'll start. Someone I had literally met about fifteen minutes previously. One of her first questions "do you have kids?" Me "no.." her "oh could you just not be bothered with the responsibility?" 😮

Those caring, empathetic parents again.....

It’s been deleted - shocker! A thread for thoughts & feelings you can’t say out loud

Latest housing thread "we need more flats cos there are more single people"

Ok to live in a tiny sweatbox if you dont have kids

Ok to live in a tiny sweat box if you don’t want a garden too :-(

A letting agent once asked why I wanted a garden, as I didn't have children.

I got told by a work colleague that she didn’t understand my wanting to buy, as only parents really need that security.

I did try and make sense of it with her but never managed to understand why she thought childless people are fine with being evicted.

There are some corkers on a thread at the moment about what children in the UK eat.

Apparently only those with children understand that children need to eat healthy food or that children sometimes want unhealthy options. And a poor poster who admitted to not having children has been told in no uncertain terms that her opinion doesn't matter.

Apparently, people who don't have children are unfit to be President. Who knew....

Harking back to Andrea Leadsom's comments about Theresa May (not that she was our finest PM but still!).

Making me so angry reading the rhetoric from the US.

Ah yes, Andrea 'As a Mother' Leadsom.

So patronising.

The gatekeeping around this kind of thing is so bizarre. It’s not particularly interesting or impressive to have an understanding of what kids eat, but often parents act like this is some sacred knowledge that only they possess and must jealously guard.

I personally couldn’t give a shit what kids want or don’t want to eat but I’m sure that it can be readily understood by people who haven’t raised them.

Also, anyone making an argument about not having a stake in our future - we have to live here for the foreseeable, which is stake enough for me. Unless there’s a childfree planet that I’m unaware of?

It's people having children without any apparent prior understanding of what they need to eat is what worries me 🤣

If they don't want us to have a say in how the country is run etc then I'm very happy not to pay taxes.

If you find the location of said planet, please put me down for a one-way ticket.

I haven't particularly had anyone comment negatively about my lack of children. However, I've always found the burning martyr 'your so lucky, if you had kids you couldn't....' comments irritating.

I've worked with a few people who were particularly annoying, you could barely say anything without them chipping in about how hard they worked because they had kids. It was exhausting and put you off talking to them.

On one occasion, I went out to meet a friend for lunch. I came back and was telling my colleagues about a lovely little craft market we'd looked around in town. One colleague said I was so lucky to have the leisure to do that, she had to spend every spare lunchtime doing kid admin or buying stuff for the kids.

I always regret not chipping in with the fact that the friend I'd met had three young kids and an infinitely more senior and responsible job than said colleague. She also worked full time not colleague's three days a week.

@ForPearlViper God, yes, the martyrdom. You reminded me of one of my colleagues who insisted that parents don’t have weekends, and that they should have more annual leave as a result.

I've been reminded of a thread about the merits of various types of deodorant. Someone said that sticks/roll ons take too long to dry. I said that mine usually dried by the time I'd brushed my teeth and moisturised, and someone asked how on earth I had time to do. all that in the morning, did I have kids? The whiff of burning mummy martyr was strong!

the latest wheeze

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/5131007-angela-rayner-and-building-more-houses?page=5&reply=137171048

Tedious. The childless cat lady shite seems to have emboldened some around here.

BK, I was subjected to:
-you're too picky (to my face)
-what's wrong with you (to my face)
-she must be gay (behind my back)

Honestly, all of the comments, and variations, made me self-conscious, like I had to constantly defend my life, and I was often in awkward situations where I had to explain myself. Now as a spbc I'm often doing it again. People are just judgmental and trying to put everyone into a box for their own comfort.

Can I have a minor moan? It’s far from the worst thing I’ve ever heard, and nothing compared to most on this thread, but message exchange with my SiL today. It’s my birthday, and I decided to work today and take tomorrow off. Today has been crap because my job is awful and stressful. She asked what my plans for tomorrow are, and I said I might make myself a cake but will decide tomorrow if I can be arsed.

Reply was, “at least nobody is relying on you making one”. ODFOD. Your choice, keep your martyrdom to yourself.

@LoobyDoop2 I guess it depends on the rest of the message/other context, but could she just have meant 'at least if you can't be arsed, that's fine not to bother'?

That could be what she meant, but I knew that already, I didn’t need to be told. And the martyrdom is strong with this one.

When my son and his then girlfriend became more serious, his girlfriend asked me out for a meal so that she and I could get to know each other better, which I thought was a lovely idea.

Anyway, part way through our lunch she brought up the subject of her having children - I would have never asked her about it - and said that she was very sorry, but that she didn't like babies or toddlers at all, so she wouldn't be having children.

I love being a mum, but I said to her very honestly that I was pleased that she and my son weren't going to have children if they didn't want them, because I felt then, and I still do now, that only people who actively really want children should be the ones to have them. I feel very sad for those that do want children but either can't have them, or are struggling very hard to do so.

I believe that far too many people have children because of an accidental pregnancy, or without giving it real consideration. So I was very happy that she knew her own mind about it (and of course I hoped that my son felt the same way, but I didn't say that to her).

I hope I don't sound arrogant or anythin̈g, and/or that I think that I am a great MiL, as I really don't believe that I am anything special at all. I made lots of mistakes when my boys were growing up (I did try to learn from the mistakes so that I could hopefully do better next time), and unfortunately I have unintentionally said the wrong thing to each of my DiLaws on occasions, but as soon as I have realised that I have done so, I apologise.

I have also asked all my children - both birth and in-laws - to please let me know if I ever say the wrong thing, especially if I have upset any of them in the process. I suppose I am a great believer in communication as I think more of us need to try quite a bit harder in that respect.