mollynp:
Hello.
I will fisk through your post in the hope I can reassure you. Although you should be addressing these concerns with your own childminder - have you spoken to her about this?
"Basically is it normal for childminders to take kids out in the car much if they don't need to (i.e. don't need to drive to schools, etc.)?" Yes and it depends on the circumstances. If the childminder is running late for whatever reason (for example, a parent brought a child late to her) and she wants to get all the children to school and nursery on time, she may use the car instead of walking. Remember too, there is a financial incentive to walk. After all, the cost of fuel in very expensive and although some childminders claim it back on expenses, the childminder still has to pay cash up front for the fuel so it is simplest not to do the journey by car in the first place unless necessary.
"I am really uncomfortable about someone I don't really know driving about with my dd, when i don't know how skilfull a driver she is or how safe her car seat is/if it is correctly fitted. I am very anal about car seats, and my dd has a stage 1 rear facing one in our car, so i'm also not really happy about her being forward facing in the car."
This is entirely understandable. Speaking as a childminder who uses her car, I always show my car to prospective parents and ask them whether they want to use my car seats (I have a collection of 10 car seats!) or their own.
When I sign the contract with parents (and only once I received the deposit cleared into my bank account), I offer them my prospectus (62 pages long!) containing my policies, procedures, permission slips and copies of my certificates. This includes a car use policy. I explain why I use the car and my prospectus has a copy of my MOT, car insurance and a certificate saying that I have completed a course on car seat fitting and have done so with the necessary competence. With 3 children of my own, and with 3 mindees on my books, I also get plenty of practice!
"Is it acceptable to ask her not to take her out in the car?" If you do insist on this requirement, the childminder will probably have to reconsider whether to take on your child. It depends on how many other children she minds, and their ages and needs. I do not know how old your daughter is, but children do not fair well being cooped up in the house all day and if there are others in her care, they will need to go out on outings. Depending on the distance, sometimes it is simply not feasible to expect 6 children under 8 to walk, for example, along very busy roads to the nearest soft play centre or park. To a certain extent, it depends on where the childminder lives.
"or if i'm uncomfortable with dd being forward facing, should i buy another rear facing seat for her car (£200-250)?"
That should not be necessary. The childminder should have the necessary equipment in good working order. The car seats my mindees use are never older than 3 years and are in the best condition possible. However, if you are not convinced, it is ultimately your decision if you wish to purchase a car seat for your daughter and the childminder to use.
"Also the car has loads of scrapes and dents in the side, which doesn't make me entirely confident!" I have a few dents, and none were my 'fault' and all occurred whilst the car was stationary. For example, I have a dent from where someone in a neighbouring parked car opened their car door into mine. Then there is the dent from where someone pushed a shopping trolley into my back bumper.
I hope this helps ? it is always difficult to reassure someone over a forum. Please go speak to your childminder. I must admit that I would be a little put out if one of my parents had asked these questions on a forum and not to me personally.
(My mindees are on holiday this week btw, just so you don't think I'm on mumsnet during working hours!)