Dutch Au Pair available - preferably close to London - Available now

[stressed2007]

We have been liaising with a very nice Dutch girl with a view to her becoming our au pair. We have now secured someone else (an au pair who we thought had let us down but is in fact still coming) and want to try to help the other girl out. Her spoken English is great. She is currently with a family in Kent but without going into details they seem like a total nightmare and very weird and she is not surprisingly very unhappy (I am sure she will fill you in on the details). Effectively she is doing no childcare at all now but being asked to do 35 hours a week cleaning while being watched by the mother! She is in a room with no curtains etc. She is looking for a new position as soon as possible. She is 18 and has extensive babysitting experience with all ages and has been with this family nearly 3 months. She is now really looking for a position with a more balanced split of work. She is interested in going anywhere but particularly would like being somewhere she could get to London from so she could do a bit of sightseeing while she is in the UK. She does seem to be a very sweet girl.

If you are interested please can you contact her on charly_lovygirl at hotmail dot com. Please could you mention in contacting her that you got her details form mumsnet as I told her I would put her details on here. Her host family has left her for 3 days in the house so she is able to come to see a prospective family during that time if you are not miles away.

I hope that someone is interested as she seems genuinely very nice.

Hi, our current AP has just flipped her lid resigned. Your Dutch girl sounds like a real possible - our AP has no responsibility for cleaning and only around 15 hours a week childcare ... No need for her to drive - in fact after a very dented car I would prefer a non-driver. Would you mind catting me with her email address? Thanks lots Qx

AN
Re the email. We got so many weird email addresses when recruiting au pairs. My husband is a deputy head of a secondary school and he regularly has to tell kids not to put 'sexy' in their email addresses when they're used for CVs to apply for jobs!!!!

I nevertheless did actually reject someone whose mail was 'little minx.' It was mid way down then rejection reasons but still on there.

I know HArriett. If I meet someone with a RL weird name, I think "What were your parents thinking?" (I don't say this of course). But an e-mail adress? You chose that yourself. That is the name you use to present yourself to people who don't know you.

I have crossed off numerous applicant based upon rude or crude e-mail addresses. And if someone's CV came across my desk like that... oh my I don't think so.

But, I'm obviously alone on this thread so I'll shut up.

I am reading this thread, and I am a little flummoxed.

So, OP doesnt really want this AP, infact she hasnt met her,she wants a different AP, yet she vouches for her. AP has only been at her present house for 3 months, and it is so horrible, as she has no curtains and only housework. Her email address is really silly, and she has no second thougths about bitching about her present family and moan about her room.

err... Why would anyone want her?

I am not surprised the OP doesnt want her. I am guessing OP has offered her a job and changed her mind when the faouvered AP became available, and now feals a little guilty?

When the weather is like this, it has to be Preludes 1, TS Elliot:

The winter evening settles down
With smell of steaks in passageways.
Six o`clock.
The burnt-out ends of smokey days.
And now a gusty shower wraps
The grimy scraps
Of withered leaves about your feet
And newspapers from vacant lots;
The showers beat
On broken blinds and chimney pots,
And in the corner of the street
A lonely cab-horse steams and stamps.

And then the lighting of the lamps.

OOPS - wrong thread. Don't mind me

FWIW I had planned with my current AP for her to do lots of childcare, but now she does almost none, um, because she is no good at it. Not saying that will be the case with dutch girl, but it IS a possibility... Still am sure dutch girl can speak for herself about all family set up and difficulties with someone who is interested

you know I have just read some of the posts on here and am absolutely flabbergasted....what nasty women a few of you are (not all, a few). Really it is unbelieveable. I have tried to help out a girl in stook and as she seemed really nice and keen and had just been unlucky with a bad family. I wanted to help and as I know what difficulty some of us have finding good au pairs so I thought I would pass her details on to someone that was interested. Why do I bother? I have already explained why we have n't just taken her as we have been speaking to someone else for ages - I am not "feeling guity" talk about totally twist the whole thing - I asked her why she did n't like her curent family,,,she was not moaning - anyone looking to take her on is gong to ask why she did n't get on with the last family. Why do I bother - she could end up with someone as unpleasant sounding and mean spirited as some of these posts. I am so disappointed!

There are good and bad au pairs (and nannies) out there. And the best way to weed them out is to be sceptical about all of them.

She may be a nice girl. And it is of course nice of you to try and help her. But, no propective employers here should enter into these discussion with a potential au pair with a false sense of security on some whom you don't actually know.

She may be lovely. But, of course, these questions should be asked. It does not make me mean spirited. It makes me thorough.

Incidentally, my current nanny was working as an au pair for a horrible family when I found her. I asked a lot of questions. I checked her references. I asked more questioned. I came to the conclusion that she was telling the truth and that she would really appreciate what we had to offer after the way they had treated her. I was right. She is fantastic.

A bit of scepticism is not a bad thing when you are interviewing for someone who is going to come llive in your house.

I could n't agree more - all good common sense. But I have never said I vouched for her - I just said she seemed nice and had been unlucky - I am not endorsing her just saying there is an au pair available now and here for those ladies having a rough time finding an au pair. I really resented the comment by the poster that I felt guilty about not having her as I had changed my mind.....total poppycock.

Poor ol' Stressed (less of the old, eh? )

I can see what you were doing and I think it commendable.

I know so APs that are treated dreadfully (amongst my friends ) so it could ba a case of A bad family rather than a poor AP.

I once met a lovely MAP who was literally kicked out of the house at 12 hrs notice as he refused the advances of the (single) mother - fwiw I did think it odd that she had chosen a MAP, but maybe I'm a cynic. He ended up at a good friend's and he was fab. The ex family had their house on the market and MAP was there when I went round, he was courteous and polite the house (inc his room) were spotless. The mother when I went for a second viewing on the house quizzed me more about what he'd been like when I went round than she told me about the house.

Another friend's AP sleeps in a room over the garage - fine and dandy - but the family have 2 dogs that yap/bark all night and disturb the family's sleep. So the family shut them in the car (parked in the garage) every night, the AP then gets no sleep.

I wouldn't want to sleep in a room with no curtains and I wouldn't expect my AP to either.

People are unkind to APs for no reason sometimes. It does happen

PS. I emailer her basic details yesterday evening, but she obviously doesn't fancy Kent as she's not replied.

doubt that it is - I am going to speak to her today so will see why she did n't reply -she might not have got it.

Hi-- have e-mailed her ,but no reply eaither.I live in Leatherhead and need an au-pair for my db's as i'm to return to work after a year off.
Any info would be gratefully received.thanks.

Yep still waiting for mine too, I guess she found somewhere?