I am apalled at our AP - she let DS poo in the park

[OneLieIn]

I have not posted this under AIBU because I know I am not. DS is 5 and more than capable of holding it in.

What do you think of this? This is a park as in with fields and trees, not swings and slides. He wiped his bum on a leaf!

OneLieIn, YOU know your son and apparently know that he would be prone to asking to poo in the park even when he doesn't need to but how is your not very experienced AP meant to know this? How long has she been with you?

I've pooed in a park before, and I'm 27. Needs must.

2 months, she is mid20s and has a ton of childcare experience. Like I say, I will bow down to popular opinion if you all think this is OK - but she should have cleared it up.

It'll still be there - send her down now with a plastic carrier bag!

my dd(3.6ish at the time) declared she needed the loo whilst in the park, so I took her to one side(far away from others!) and to my suprised she pooed She didn't tell me that she wanted a poo, just the toilet. I did leave it, but only whilst I went to get a nappy bag from ds' changing bag and then i cleared it up!

So no I don't think letting him do it there is an issue tbh. But yes she should've cleared it up

But what was she supposed to have cleared it up with?

Should she have scooped it up in her shoe and hopped home?

"2 months, she is mid20s and has a ton of childcare experience"

Doesn't make her qualified nanny. There are worst childcare disasters in the world. For example my son once had a childminder who did not see car seats as necessary.

You have made your views known. If you are nasty to her and make her go and pick up the poo you might lose an otherwise good Au pair.

I wouldn't have an issue with him pooing in the park but not picking it up is a no no.
I took dd to a park while at a friend's house and she needed to do numbers 1 and 2. We were 20 minutes walk from friend's house and there were no public toilets so I took her behind a bush, got her to crouch over one of ds's nappy sacks then stuck everything in the dog poop bin. I didn't have a problem with it, nor did my friend and tbh I hadn't given it a second thought. She certainly wouldn't have done it had she not been desperate.
Dd is 4 1/2

i have to say, it shows ingenuity on her part for not being a total tyrant and making the poor boy hold it in - which is bad for you!

a shit in the park is not the end of the world, in fact, isn't horse manure used as a fertilizer?? so not only is she quick thinking, she's eco friendly too!

what a gem

this is silly I am sorry but your child is JUST 5yo and if he need it and your park does not have publick toilet .... if I were you I will say thank you to you au pair that she was there with him. And another .... did you think that au pair did not have any paper (she did not if he clean his bot. with leaf) or some paper bag or ... do you expect that she will cleaned poo just with hands????

DS1 went through a phase of pooing in the park - he would eat lunch, then I would collect him from school, and then he would need a poo. He was 3. He pooed in the park quite a few times, but I did always have a carrier bag with me to pick it up.

He's 6 now, and hasn't done it for years.

Sometimes when you need to go, you need to. DH had to poo in a box in the back of his van last week. Not sure why he needed to tell me about it though

Apparently the army use cling film for this purpose!! So ensure next time your AP is armed with some of this and a small bag....

ehm, and what would a qualified nanny do??

Well I let my ds who is 6 poo on a secluded beach in Northumberland He was desperate, there was nowhere else for him to go.

If I tell him to hold it in he gets really distressed.

When you've got to go you've got to go.

FWIW, I know plenty of grown men who pack baby wipes in golf bags becasue sometimes on the 9th hole, miles from a loo they need a poo.

PMSL at Blu's comment about a Buzzard thinking her tampon was a snack! Classic line Blu

allowing an emergancy poo in the park is just about ok...
Saying that this summer i was with my 5.5 year old a 5 min walk from the loos in country park with a portable potty in my bag (for 2 year old brother)... i still made him go to the toilet.... i didnt realise quite how desperate he had suddenly become, and we DID make it, just, but as far as i was concerned he was 5 years old and i made him wait for the toilet and he did... then told him that he was old enough to ask eariler

but IMO leaving it there without cleaning it up is not ok at all ... i certainly wouldnt wantto be cleaning human excrement off a shoe

Oh Blu - you really are on form today!

I was laughing so hard that DH has just come over and read the thread over my shoulder and is now howling with laughter too!

To the OP - there are some things in life that are just beyond asking the hired help to do and picking up your child's poo is one of them I'm afraid!

There is more that a hint of the Hyacinth about your 'We don't do that' that is making me verge on the incontinent too

OneLiein - if you are so concerned about the poo get her to take you to it and remove it youself.

Would prefer not to but it wouldn't bother me that much if it was necessary.

My ds has had numerous alfresco poos. Lol at 'anal'.

nannyL - no child should be made to wait for the toilet, under no circumstances should waiting for the loo be used as a threat - 5 years old is still quite impressionable you know!

just my thoughts

Apparently, when on undercover missions in the wilds, the SAS hold out bin bags for one another to poo in so their "movements" can't be tracked ....

Lol ds does love to do a bear poo.

soapbox, I have never been called hyacinth before and OMG, you soooooooooooooo don't know me in real life! Anyway, have decided maybe the poo is reasonable, the cleaning up of it or lack of is not.