CM Club - TRYING TO TRACE A PARENT!!!!

[KSquiff]

I'm owed a lot of money by a parent of a mindee but she left 1 wk afer she moved into her new flat and I could never pin her down for long enough to get her new address. I'm actually lucky she was here long enought to sign the contract - she even had other peoplecollect the child to avoid giving me the details!

Any idea's how I can race her? tried uktrace and 192.com but no joy

I have her previous address (rented) DOB and even her NI number, any ideas, anyone.....?

It sounds like you have tried really hard to get this money back and your hands are tied now. There isn't really much you can do without paying out more money. If you hire someone to find her and she has no money then you won't be able to recover this either. It's hard trying to run a business. I imagine it's alot harder for cm as you build up a relationship with the child and their family.
To be honest with you, she's gone to such legnths not to pay you, I really don't think she has the money or is prepared to hand it over. I've been in situations where I can't afford my bills. It's really unplesant. I would contact all the other cm and nurseries where you live though and ask them to be on their guard.

I did try warn others through the CIS, they said they completely understand and its so horrible to be in this situation (and I blame noone but her and myself - for not insisting on getting all the info I needed, and I WILL NOT do it agian) but they have to be inpartial and can't hold or pass on that kind of info, which I do understand.

Its terrible for my son, everytime the bell goes he gets all excited and says mindee's name, its horrible to have to tell him every morning he's not coming anymore.

Do you think I should warn people about her on here?

That's a tough one. I'd be tempted to write to my local newspaper about the perils of being a childminder. You could also put an add for info in there and see what happens.

Good idea, but more money.

Can't tell you how frustrated and angry I am.

It shouldn't cost a lot, a few pounds. Just say that you are trying to find the where abouts of.... They nomally put them in the classifieds section, where the "single man looking for..." go.

Will give it a go, do I say why or just say I'm trying to find her?

Don't say why you are looking, or you could maybe say that you are a friend who's lost touch or have some nice news to share. Don't give your name. You can arrange for any correspondence to be sent to the paper (PO box type thing), this way you don't have to print your name and address so her friends/family won't be discouraged.

Maybe something along the lines of 'old school friend is looking for the where abouts of..... Still believed to be in the ..... area, I would very much like to be able to get in touch with her. All replies to ....newspaper, box number....'

Will try that, thanks AL.

Will let you know the outcome.

Good luck.

KSquiff I used to trace people for debt recovery, what we would do is ring the contact number we have so in your case the MIL and say that you need her new address, then you get the usual oh I can't give you that, you then do the "oh god, I have some of her stuff and I'm about to move and I don't want to take her stuff with me" and see where that leads (you would be surprised at how often we got the address this way)

You could also write to the neighbours either side of her old address, she may have pissed someone off who may give the area she may live. Include a stamped address envelope to make it easy for them, we used to have a tear off strip at the bottom of the letter.

Also have you gone to her old address? There may be a "to let" sign so you know who the agents are and you could approach them, they can forward mail but they don't like to so sometimes you do get mail returned to you with their forwarding address on.

I agree about the elecotrol roll, but you may have to wait a few weeks to see that as we have only just had ours through.

Good luck.

I'm on the committee at a local pre-school and we have about 3 non-paying famillies that owe about £3,000! between them.
One familly did a midnight flit, and left all of a sudden, did not pay rent on their house and just ran back to their parents pleading poverty.
They had been using cocaine and ran up huge debts and are expecting another child .
Another familly just don't care and think that they don't have to pay anything as they get the nursery grant, ditto for another familly.
We are getting in touch with our local playlink to see how to get them to pay up.
One local businessman is going to help us by giving us details of a "special" debt collection letter that gets people to pay up fast!
Sorry to the OP for having so many problems, i'm taking note of everything as knowing my luck one of these famillies might want to use me for childminding but i'm not THAT desperate.

i thought if you get the nursery grant you didn't have to pay?

Thanks Fizzy, will give it a go. I'm not sure how willing to give info she will be as I think Mindee's dad has moved back in with his mum (I assume by MIL you meant Mother In Law?)

Will have a drive around to her old place tommorrow and see if I can dig anything up or see any signs. Will also slip a note through the doors of her neighbours.

Thanks for the advice.

Open to all suggestions.

Its my fault for being so soft and trusting her (my mum has always said I'm far too trusting). In future I will take measures to ensure this doesn't happen again i.e. no payment on time = no childcare!!! I will not be taken for a mug again.

if you have her ni no,could you ring up IR and enquire if she is working and also see if they could give you an address?

might be worth going to local library and giving them all the info you have about her, they may be able to find her on the electral roll

A note to dad, would reach her im sure, also a note to mil, maybe saying that if she doesnt pay you within 2 weeks, you will be taking her to court - dont suppose they are married?If so then he would be liable for the payment as well wouldnt he?

it really sucks that you are out of pocket, yet seems nothing you can do (hug)

IR wouldn't give me that info, GOD I wish they would - I'm sure "the people" would sympathise but with DPA there's no way they could.

Will try the library but again not sure if they would give me the info.

I actually sent the temination letter to dad too although when I called him on Fri (withheld my no so he picked up) he denied all knowlede of it, but I know he got it - could tell by the way he reacted when I asked him.

I would have thought being the mindee's father he would be liable in some way anyway - I know if it was my hsuband he would feel liable. But then again there's absolutely NO way we would do this to anyone.

I just can't believe there are people out there like this, who think its ok to do this to people. It means now my kids are completely missing out, her son isn't!!!

I've tried everything I can think of and will try everone's suggestions tommorrow, I'm desperate!

Ksquiff, this is so annoying, I had this with a parent who left without paying a £500 bill, gave no notice so also owed for the month's notice period. The most annoying thing is that she claimed for a couple of weeks that she hadnt been paid by work through some mess up, then went off on holiday to Turkey!! Then just never showed up again, and moved house. Never got the money back, and we had to cancel our holiday plans as we then couldn't afford it!! People don't realise do they? Did the dad sign the contract too, or was it just the mum? Could you send letters to the dad and to the mil, threatening legal action? Might shock her into contacting you? Best of luck, I know how stressful this type of situation is

The nursery grant only covers 12.5hrs and this year will be up to 15hrs a week.
So when the non-paying famillies were at the pre-school, the day would start from 9am until 12.30pm which was 3.5hrs, so basically each day they had to pay £8 for that one xtra hour.
They NEVER came over early at 11.30 to collect their child and ALWAYS made full use of the full sessions available.
At least with the 15hrs grant then most people could have 4 sessions a week and just pay a little more for the 5th session.

£8 for one hour? that's expensive!! ds' is £3.40 per 2.5 hour session.

JoJo, thats what the letter said anyway, its what the NCMA told me to write. It was sent to mum's best friend, MIL and her previous employer who frowarded it. She knows I don't have her current address and she doesn't care.

Sounds exactly the same, she claimed she couldn't pay me for 2 weeks because her employer had messed her pay up (didn't stop her shopping and spending 70 quid in next and 30 in Topshop on her way to collect mindee!!), the following day dad turned up with 200 (137.50 short!) but she refused to pick up or respond to any attempts at contacting her. Paid me on 3 days later then disappeared!

Can't believe I have been so easily Duped!!! AAARRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

oh i see, sorry I missed that. In the end, mine went bankrupt and started to pay back the money through an agency, started off at about £2 a month, then it went down and down as more debts were uncovered till it got to pence, and I stopped bothering to cash the cheques in the end, as it just reminded me of how annoyed i was about it every time!!
I know this is very annoying, don't blame yourself, though. We could all do things differently in retrospect but I think sometimes by their very nature childminders are often generous and giving people, and sometimes people take advantage. You will be tougher with people in the future, I bet, but it wasn't your fault, some people are just gits. Really feel for you, I remember how I felt and it really knocks your confidence.