blimey I'm naive!

[Kewcumber]

Just thread a thread on NannyJob, no need to discuss why

I haven't read it before and the thing that shocked me most was the repeated references to half a day pay being "nothing" to their employers.

Fuck me as an employer of a CM half a days pay is the differnce between me having a night once a month and not going out at all

AIBU to be shocked by the cavalier approach to employers money!

Yours naively, KC.

Using a CM and employing a nanny is pretty different though.

I was also quite shocked by that. Childcare costs can often be a very high proportion of a parents salary.

Not sure what you mean RahRahRachel... it's not much different at all really - it's just the type of relationship. Childminders are their own boss, whereas nannies are employees. Major difference is where the childcare takes place.

KC, typical NJ thread. I'm loaded, don't you know?

no it isn't rachel childcare costs are a huge part of my salary money is tight, if I have a second and it makes more financial sense to employ a nanny, money will be equally (in fact more) tight.

No doubt there are wealthy nanny employers out there but if ordinary run of the mill not particularly well off people didn;t employ nannies too there presumably wouldn;t be many nanny jobs around.

I was just really shicked at the attitude that employers money mattered less to then than to a nanny. I'm prepared to bet I have less disposable income than most nannies.

I meant financially. More "normal" people tend to use childminders, whereas you have to be a pretty high earner to employ a nanny.

I was quite open-mouthed reading that same thread, (1) by attitude towards money as if it grows on trees (2) seeing someone being fleeced alive for what seemed like not very much and seemed to stem from a misunderstanding and (3) realising that our nannies may be spending their working hours posting about us on sites like this

Nannynick, I wish they were all a bit more like you and a bit less like, well, um....

lololol at "More "normal" people tend to use childminders"

you haven't met kew, have you?

I am a pretty high wage erner compared to a nanny rachel. After mortgage (London), childcare and bills, I have enough spare cash for one, not too expensive, night out a month and a cheapish holiday once a year (caravan in UK this year) and maybe a weekend away too.

Don;t get me wrong I don;t consider myself badly off but half a days pay what would that be £35'ish? Is my "entertainment" money for a month.

Rahrah, we would love to use a childminder, but they won't do the early starts I need, so we have no choice. I know that is the same for lots of people.

And yes, my nanny does take home more each month than I have in disposable income once all our bills are paid...

I want to say something very horrible about nannies but am restraining myself. [gritted teeth]

None of us knows the constraints of another's budget and we would be stupid to assume we do, imo. [diplomat]

I'm a bit more flush at the moment as I've reduced my mortgage to interest only so I can restock my savings. But its not exactly a long term solution so it will have to go back up at some point.

Thanks Tutter! I am frequently accused of being "normal" I'll have you know.

i have employed a nanny, and am abnormal, so i guess she's right then

nannies are cheaper than nurseries or childminders where I live. And I only have two kids. God only know how people manage to support 4 or 5 kids.

Am beginning to think if DC2 ever arrives that I will have to find the money for extar CM hours - sharing my space with someone else seems bad enough but sharing with someone who has such a distorted and well teenager-y approach to money would just do my head in.

Before I offend anyone (or anyone else!) I'm not arguing that money is meaningless to nanny employers and I know lots of people really have to stretch their budgets to get good childcare. But generally nanny employers are very high earners in comparison to most people. Maybe the nannies on that thread weren't taking into account things like the bigger mortgages, bigger bills, those chelsea tractors that guzzle petrol () etc that nanny employers have compared to lower earners that also means they have little disposable income.

I've worked for families for which childcare was a huge part of their budget and have always appreciated that. I have also worked for a family for whom the money they paid me did mean a lot more to me than to them.

Normal?

It depends on whether your nannny is live in/share/part time/qualified/experienced. Also, once you've 3 children, a nanny is usually more cost effective.

Not always true about high wage earners.

at the prospect of dc2, kew.

Not all nannies think they have a right to all your cash. They do, however, have the right to all your biscuits. Sorry, it's the law.

don;t think that my vauxhall meriva could be described as a Kew tractor but I feel sure that a nanny would easily make assumptions about me based on my job, my house, my accent. Which are completely untrue.

Besides - the argument shouldn;t be about whether the money measn as much to the employer (they earned it they don;t have to justify what it means to them) but whether the extar money was fairly due.

I am still shocked that anyone responsible enough to be looking afetr children is juvenile enough to think that money should be paid just on the basis that the emploeyer can afford it!

I clearly don't know enough nannies.

Obviously only in theory

The average salary in this country is around 25k, and less than 50k puts you in the top 10% - I'm not saying all nanny employers are fabulously wealthy, but I'd assume most are pretty above average earners.

I don't think the nannies who chat on NJ are really a fair sample of the nanny population. I find NJ to be quite bitchy toward employers. Although I did once have a fab nanny whom I found on NJ.

So what if the employers are wealthy? What does that have to do with it?

I think that's the way of message boards - reading this forum doesn't give a very representative view of nanny-employers either. You're bound to take the side of the person there, and be support/bitch.

rachel - I agree that I am above average earner - see below. That doesn't mean I have any spare cash. Obviously I could choose not to live in an expensive part of London or take in lodgers etc, it doesn't mean I have enough disposable cash to be csual about £35.