Is it ok to leave baby with grandparents to go on honeymoon?

[Demacrexsigma]

11 month old dilemma

Me and my husband got married in March 2020, just before Covid hit and closed everything off. So we rebooked our honeymoon like three times so as not to lose the money. At the end of the third booking we had to cancel as they’d upped the costs by an extra £3000 and as both of us were on furlough still we couldn’t afford that so we cancelled. We only got half our money back and the rest the airline kept so we had to book another holiday by January 2022, which we have for June 2023.
We didn’t quite expect that I’d get pregnant quite so quickly after trying and welcome our firstborn in July 2022. However we can’t afford to upgrade the tickets to accommodate the baby as well and as it’s our honeymoon too to Disneyland.
Its booked for 18 days and my parents are completely fine to have him for those many days, but I’m worried as an 11 month old he’s not going to be happy and going to miss us too much even with video calls every day.
Is it better to just lose the £2500 and book somewhere around the UK to take him with us, or would he be ok with the grandparents?

Said by someone clearly clueless about attachment theory.

I left DDs for a fortnight when I went on honeymoon - they were 2yrs and 6mths old.

They divided the time between both sets of grandparents & it doesn't seem to have had any lasting effect on them.

But then I left DD2 overnight at 2 weeks old as my parents had a big anniversary party that had been planned for over a year.

Sleepovers at grannies were a regular thing throughout their childhood, their grandparents houses are like second homes to them even now at 22 & 20 as they spent so much time there growing up.

I’ve never been away from our 2 for more than a week and they’re 16 and 14!

it’s a very long time, and a huge amount to ask of your parents too.

I’d either have a shorter honeymoon or take your lo with you.

Why would it cost so much to add the baby to the booking? Under twos don’t even need their own seat, you can take it in turns having them on their lap during the flight.

In answer to your original question, I think it’s far too long to be away from a baby if it’s avoidable. If you were, for example, in hospital then yes, baby and grandparents would just have to muddle through and cope but it’s not something I’d do by choice. The baby will miss you desperately and won’t know whether you’re coming back. It’s a long time for grandparents to look after a baby that’s missing its parents; it would be hard on them too.

18 days is a very long time to leave a baby and a long time to expect anyone else to look after him. Are your parents really ok about it or just saying they are to make you happy. Can you go for a shorter time?
However only you know your baby and how you think he and your parents will be.

I have had separation anxiety leaving him with husband whilst I go food shopping once or twice and i would honestly rather the money lost because I can’t bear to be away from him at all. Now or when he’s 11 months old

Ok?!? Not what I asked, but I’m breastfeeding until 10 months anyway.

There's your answer.

This. 18 days is far too long.

Only because I don’t know how a 11 month old may react. I’d rather not go if he would become too distressed at us going

18 days is a long long time to leave a baby.

If you're going to Disney for the rides and stuff, it won't work with an 11 month old in tow. You'll never be able to go on at the same time.

I looked after my friends 6mo for a week when they grabbed a week long overdue holiday. We all survived very well. Go for it!

Only just read this. Don't then.

@Shmithecat2 1 week is v different to 18 days - for parents and baby

The longest I’ve spent away from my 4.5 yr old is four days, my 10 month old, 20 hours. Spending any longer than a few nights away from them would be hellish. It’s a personal thing and I think you’ve answered your own question.

We did take my oldest to Disneyland at 10 months (and Disneyworld at 15 months) and she loved both though!

Gosh I wouldn't leave my baby/kids for 18 hours let alone 18 days. I hate leaving them even to go supermarket

OP at 11 month my LO had very bad separation anxiety and cried non stop when he was separated from me, even hours at the time (never stopped crying). I wouldn’t go personally, babies grow up so quick and right now you are his universe and he needs you! Can’t you take him to Florida and have a pool/beach holiday? Shouldn’t cost anything to add a baby to the booking.

Personally is find that too long. He'd probably be fine, but I'd just be unsettled the whole time. Plus I'd rather not be so far away from a baby that young.

Is there any way you could get some money back from the holiday and even use it to go somewhere closer to home for a week? Or pay for your parents to go with you on the understanding that they take the baby out each day?

Well then it’s beyond idiotic that you’d even ask if it’s ok.

Way too long in my opinion. I couldn't personally x

That’s a very long time away from a baby who won’t understand where you’ve gone and if you’re coming back. I wouldn’t leave them for that long, it will cost you a fortunate to get back too if he doesn’t settle.
Can’t you take him with you, shouldn’t cost any extra or just a small fee for the plane.

Your child will be ok and looked after Im sure, but it’s definitely not a good thing to do to your child. They have no concept of holidays at this age. They will feel abandoned and very emotionally distressed. They have had you to rely on their whole lives and then you suddenly disappear for almost 3 weeks?! I honestly think it’s slightly cruel.

Yes it’s fine
but you don’t want to, and that’s fine too

Wow ok I asked for an opinion not for you to be judge and jury. How rude! I don’t even want to leave him I asked for others opinions and whether it had even been done. Least I’ll show my child kindness rather then what you’ve apparently been taught