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NannyCam and our Male Nanny (Manny)
foursacrowd · 18/03/2007 12:06
NannyCam and our Male Nanny (Manny):
Well, the brief story is that ATM we have a male nanny, since the difficult arrival of DD. Excellent references, married and a clear background check. No problems on the face of it, but we were curious to see what he was doing with our DS2 and DD1 every day.
A friend of mine put together two tiny camera systems that activated when someone came into the room, and we hid it one downstairs and one in the children's bedroom. They were in for about 6 weeks, and DH and I watched highlights in the evenings.
What we saw was a days packed with love and activity, total attention and consistency. It had never even entered our mind about the possibility for any perversion on his part, so it came as no surprise that we had not employed a Paedophile, contrary to many of the stereotypes on mumsnet! We also discovered why the house is sometimes a bombsite, he prefers to direct his attentions to our DS and DD rather than domestics (which he can do to perfection).
So here is the problem. I feel guilty as hell that I thought to do this, especially as I have seen truly outstanding work that I really did not appreciate beforehand. But where do I go from here? I now value him more than ever, but feel that I have betrayed the trust relationship. Should I tell him? My DH also now feels aquard talking to him, maybe something to do with his insecurities.
What did we expect to see, and why did we do it? I don't know. Everything was perfect before, but it has turned into one big f**K up.
Any thoughts greatly welcomed!
amidaiwish · 18/03/2007 12:18
i don't find it weird. i use a nursery because i would feel curious about what they "do" all day... i know i don't look after the dc's 100% of the time (who knows what they are doing atm?!) but if i employ someone then i would expect them to.
anyway, i understand why you did it, now be thankful that you can work at ease knowing your dcs are well cared for.
don't say anything. just move on.
JOSIE3 · 18/03/2007 12:22
I have to point out that what you did was illegal. You have an obligation to inform employees if they are to be filmed. I know because i work as a nanny and was filmed secretly a few years back - not intentionally i have to tell you - maid was stealing. The family were taken to court by the maid and lost.
Having said that if i were in your position i'd probably just remove the cameras without fuss and never mention it. Obviously you've employed a great nanny, and it would be awful to loose him. Live with the mistake - which is all it is really - and forget about it.
hatrick · 18/03/2007 12:28
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hatrick · 18/03/2007 12:31
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JOSIE3 · 18/03/2007 12:33
foursacrowd- you invited comments!
Don't get me wrong, I'd want to know exactly what my babies were up to aswell. And kudos to you for epmloying a male nanny - many people won't even consider one! riduclous when you consider half of parents are well erm MALE!
I'd be tempted to say to my friends that you've checked him out, seen him in action and wou;dn't hesitate to recommend him. If they still question you then tell em to shush!
hatrick · 18/03/2007 12:33
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