Boss always late!

[sharkteeth]

Hiya! I am looking for some advice. I am a nanny and I work for a family 3 days a week 8am-6pm. In the beginning mum was always home at 5:45-5:50 meaning we could have a chat and handover and I could leave at 6. She was very occasionally late and I know that you can't help being late. She was very apologetic and I honestly didn't mind.

But since the New Year she has been late 2,sometimes 3 days a week. She's a cyclist and sometimes gives the excuse of traffic. Other times she might text saying she's running 10 minutes late and that usually means twenty. Once she just outright said she was down at the pub!

I'm not leaving work now until 6:15 at the earliest. I'm not even getting apologies anymore or any extra pay.

I was wondering what others would do in this situation? Would you say anything/ ask for extra pay? Or just let it go?

Thanks :)

I'm a nanny you should make it clear in a polite way it's not on and she needs to come back on time. I've just started a new job and made it clear if they can come home 5/10 mins before so there's enough time for a handover. We work enough hours without having to stay any longer and not being paid. So really you can suggest that they move your finish time till a bit later. Or you start charging them say for every 15mins their late like some childminders/nurseries do.

I would raise it with her - she may not be aware that you find it an issue. If it carries on then I would maybe politely just suggest that if she is struggling to get home for 6 that they extend your hours to 6.30pm (if that would work ok for you?) so that she doesn't seel rushed & you can have a decent handover. She may genuinely be struggling to leave work in time to get home & have good intentions to get there on time. I work 3 days a week myself & on countless occasions colleagues have grabbed me "just for a quick word" as I'm heading out of the door which adds another 10 mins on my day often.

As a cyclist she shouldn't really be able to play the traffic card as cyclists in my experience tend to whizz past the queues (lucky things!)

ask for a chat and say you have noticed she is often late/past agreed contracted hours and ask if she is finding getting home on time hard and did she want to discuss a later finishing time

Could have written your post. I also need to get brave and speak to bosses about habitual lateness.

I don't think this is acceptable, I employ my nanny until 6, I'm always home by 5.45 and often earlier. Would agree that you need to discuss.

I had this in a previous job - and mb would text 10 mins after she was due home to say sorry she was running late. I had a chat and asked if she wanted to change the contracted hours but she said she would make the effort to leave the office on time (like Aberchips she would get caught by colleagues as she was leaving) She did improve greatly but would usually get home at my finish time and then spend 10 mins chatting about the kids and what we'd been up to. I just accepted this as in all other respects the job was great and they were paying well, but if she had slipped back to as bad as things were originally then I would have had another chat.

Ditto above about maybe extending your hours so you have time for a handover rather than rushing out of the door. But after that if it continues, I'd probably just put up with it. I know it's frustrating - but I don't think many people finish bang on time with their jobs - it's just part of life.
It depends if there's a bit of 'give' from the family as well. Do they finish earlyish other times and give you hour/s off but still pay you?
If my nanny continuously made a fuss about 10 mins overtime, I think it would ruin our relationship and just create sourness. But I sometimes give her a few hours off (paid) here and there so expect a bit of give and take.

I've had this problem. Boss was 15-30 mins late home every eve, no text, call, no sorry nor extra pay! This had been going on for a while, so a couple of weeks ago I emailed her just politely saying I'd like to finish at our agreed contracted time.
All's been going well so far.
You've got to bring it up

I agree with the poster who made the point about give and take. It's so frustrating leaving 10/15mins late, because if you rely on public transport this could mean missing a train or bus home. However, it's life I'm afraid, not everyone can leave work on time- what does the mom do? I've worked for families in the past who were nhs doctors, they could never leave the ward on time, but they would often let me leave early on a Friday afternoon, and still pay me so those 10mins were always returned to me in some way. It's unlikely your extra time will go unnoticed and it could sour relations if you don't go about it the right way- asking to change your hours may work, perhaps start quarter of an hour later and finish later?

theres give and take and theres taking the piss

yes if you are a nanny and every now and again finish early then great, and its give and take - but if you dont ever finish early, then you need to say to employers about time keeping

they wouldnt like it if you were 15mins late every am

its also about respect - yes sometimes trains/meeting etc run late, then let your nanny know

and i disagree about the nanny souring the relationship by mentioning it, the employer has already soured the relationship by continually being late

Thank you for all the advice I think I'm going to sit down this weekend and write an email!

I'm not particularly fussed about the money it's more about the lack of respect. I know that as a nanny I have to be flexible and I totally understand you can't always leave on time. But this is a constant thing.

If she's in London it's entirely possible to be late due to traffic even on a bike. Ultimately though, she's not leaving early enough and it's now habitual by the sound of things.
Time for one of those tricky conversations. I suspect that as soon as it becomes paid overtime for every part of 15 mins, it will halt but I would beware a parent who thinks that they can just tell you they are going to be late without so much as a by your leave

People who employ nannies need to realise that the nanny has the same rights of employment as people employed elsewhere . If your lady employed you to work in her bank , factory, shop or office etc she wouldn't text you to say you had to leave 15 minutes late. If you turned up late every day she would be the first to complain. Ask her for a chat . What would she do if you asked to leave 15 minutes early every night ? Being a nanny is a demanding role, very tiring and a long day . The least she can do is be home on time 98% of the time .

By all means mention it politely but also bear in mind that people in professional jobs (teachers, doctors, lawyers etc, people who work in banks, etc) almost never work the minimum contracted hours. In 15 years of working I think I might have done 9 to 5 on the dot possibly once.

You will show maturity and an understanding of the world if you let it be known that you understand that although your boss may well try her hardest to leave on time, she might simply be unable to, mostly probably due to colleagues (a call that finishes 5 minutes late, a colleague who needs your views on email before you leave etc). Extending your working hours may be wiser, but do be careful not to sound like a whinger.

Sound like a whinger? Show maturity? WTAF?!

It doesn't matter what job the boss does. The nanny has contracted hours, and the boss is just taking the piss - especially if she's admitted she's been in the pub! If it had been set up at the beginning, that the boss had unreliable/unpredictable hours, then that's a different matter. But it wasn't like that.

OP you have to deal with this and stop it happening, because this is all about her not having any respect for you.

Don't make it emotional. But send her an email something along the lines of:

"Dear X

Having been employed by you now for [x] months, I would appreciate it if we could review how things are working.

Whilst everything seems to be going well between me and [child/children], I'm concerned about the hours that I am being asked to work. As we agreed, I would start at [x] am and finish at 6pm. However, it is increasingly the case that I am not finishing until 6.15pm. In the last month, for example, I have finished on time on [x] out of [y] occasions.

I am happy to be flexible, but regularly working late without being paid for this extra time is not acceptable. I am wondering if it might be appropriate for us to re-negotiate our contract, and extend my working day (and therefore increase my pay) so that your working day can be accommodated?"

And start keeping a log from now on in terms of your arrival time at work and your boss's arrival time home. Get her to sign them as well, so there's no arguing about it.

I think on day three I'd have texted at 5:59 asking who would be looking after the kids between me leaving and the boss getting home.

When they panicked, I'd say I'll stay this time but next time I will have to shoot.

I am glad all our childcarers have been a bit more flexible.Quite apart from the "can't leave the ward" argument I have frequently been delayed by trains running late or being cancelled. In our defence we have always given more days off/holiday than the contract states,decent bonuses and a bottle of wine/glass of bubbly if late on a Friday night.:)

Well yes, Still. I had a nanny for almost 15 years, and my job wasn't predictable. So there were times when me or my DH were late home. But because we worried about taking advantage, our nannies were either allowed to go home early on other days or were paid extra.

And in that 15 years, we only had 2 nannies - one for 6 years, the second for 9 years - so I hope that indicates how well they were treated.

I think people sometimes forget that they are employers and that their nannies are employees who deserve to be treated properly and not like domestic slaves servants.

Yy BIWI. We use a nursery. If trains are cancelled, we call a friend to help out, if no friend available , we pay the late fee.

Even if it's unavoidable, it shouldn't go without compensation.

BIWI and AlternativeTentacles: each to their own, but a text such as AT's would be the end of the working relationship as far as I am concerned. There is a reason that "breakdown of trust and confidence" is one of the legal grounds for dismissal.

FWIIW, like others, we pay a good salary, offer more holiday than the statutory minimum and will release our nanny early when possible, but we do expect flexibility. OP's employer may well feel the same and an inflexible attitude may well diminish her employability. Flexibility is after all one of the reasons people use nannies instead of nurseries...

I think it kind of depends on the extent of the lateness (10/15 mins is different from 30 IMO), your own commute, and whether you are OK with the overall terms and conditions, especially pay.

We use after school club, they close at 6 and have huge fines for lateness, so we always get there! Or ask a friend for help when transport is a mess. we previously had a CM who was more flexible which we appreciated, but didn't take the piss. Hangovers and getting the DC to leave her house () often took us ten mins over the agreed time (train times meant we got to her just 5 mins before) and this became usual, but was discussed at the outset.

If clients' jobs mean it's difficult to leave on time then it'd be polite for them to raise this upfront and make clear if overtime will be paid or unpaid.

A senior colleague at work with a nanny very often leaves late, and also often makes reference to how little salary she has left once the nanny is paid. she seems to really resent the cost! A friend with a nanny makes similar comments. Wonder if some people with nannies feel like because it's an expensive form of childcare they should be entitled to be late IYSWIM?

Handovers not hangovers, bloody autocorrect!

New contract could say "We may sometimes go ten minutes past 6pm due to our hangovers. We will compensate for this with "

I love the way that some families say that want a flexible nanny - this often means that she will end up doing duties that she shouldn't - cleaning - and having to stay late

Obv if employers are late we stay. We don't have a choice. We can hardly leave the children home alone - so if they ring and say 'we are going to be late is this ok' what can we say or do

No it's not I need to leave at 7pm as have dinner with friend/gym class/ babysitting etc - it's not going to make them come home on time if they can't

As I said previously it's respect. Yes bosses run late at times / but tell the nanny

Biggest bug bear is the phone call at 6pm Saying still at office/just getting train now etc / so gonna be late - knowing full well that to be home at say 7pm they need to leave office at 5.30 - so call nanny at 5.30 and tell her grovel even lol but don't assume they can always stay - we have to but may ruin our evenings plans