Poorly child

[ifmamaainthappy]

Child is 14 months, has a cold, just generally not happy, contacted Mom to let her know, that she's not herself, Mom has told me she's got to much to do to collect her at the moment??? What do you do??? i can't just sit cuddling all day, have others to look after, ( i'm having a late lunch and 5 minutes right now!!)

No. I disagree. You can't legislate for everything and write a policy that covers every aspect of a child's behaviour. As parents we all know the difference when our children are a bit whingy and not quite right and when they're really unwell - your mum senses start tingling because the cry is different, their behaviour is different. It's not something that is easy to write down in a policy and ultimately comes down to trust. I don't make a habit of ringing the parents I work for so I would hope they'd trust me if I rang and said 'he/she really doesn't seem right today'.

this is the reason that we ask for more than one emergency contact - so that someone is available to collect.

it amazes me that people could be so pig headed about collecting their own child when ill! Your child is ill, you collect him/her, surely??

do people really rate their child's health/welfare below their work/shopping/gym/hair appointments??

Sorry x-post, that was to Blondes. Jassy, that's how i operate actually. I'd ring and have a chat and we'd work it out together. The idea that the OP shouldn't have been even bothering the parents with 'a cold' is one I don't agree with though.

blondes, i think you are a nanny,aren't you? we are different as childminders, we are self employed - we dictate our own terms - we don't have to look after sick children. if we feel the child is too ill to be with us we will insist on collection. a parent can not simply turn around and say 'sorry too busy' it doesn't work like that. if i got that answer, i would be delivering the child to the parent and delivering my notice to them at the same time...

Reet - I doubt very much that anyone equates work with gym/shopping/hair appointments.
If i dashed off from work every time my DCs had a minor illness I would have to take unpaid leave and would seriously hamper any prospects of career development. DHs job is equally demanding and we have no family within 3 hours drive. Thankfully we have a wonderful nanny and this thread helps confirm we made the right choice.

Do CMs give a refund when they send a DC home by the way?

no, none that i know ceeveebee, as the cm is available to work...

I would have to take unpaid leave and would seriously hamper any prospects of career development

Sounds normal to me. A nanny is absolutely the way to go if you earn enough to pay for one. Most of us don't. My childminder is brilliant and her fees are very reasonable but I have to look after my own child if she is sick.

very true AllDirections

I would of course come home if my DCs were actually ill but I don't count colds, grizzling, teething etc as illnesses.

Bloody hell thank god for the nannys of the world..demanding a working mother leave work to collect a child with a cold?? What the actual hell? School don't send kids home with a cold why should a cm? A cold!!??

Perhaps giving up child care is for the best reet .ASAP.

there are different types of cold - no one is suggesting a child be sent home with a sniffle. but schools/nurseries would send a child home that is full of cold and too ill to be in a childcare setting. who wants a sneezing/coughing/infectious child in a childcare setting with other children?
no one actually even knows this mother was at work - op says mum and dad are both full of cold - they could just have easily been at home ill themselves and still too busy to collect.

i've had a child brought to me extremely ill and with a high temp (didn't realise until she was through the door and by then mums phone was convienently switched off) and it turned out both mum and dad were at home that day!!

some people need to sort their priorities out, seriously!!

"Do CMs give a refund when they send a DC home by the way?"

What, the CMs should be out of pocket for a child being ill?

To be frank, no one on here, except possibly the OP, has any idea what was wrong with the child. It might have been "just" a cold (although sometimes they can be severe and unpleasant), but the cold symptoms might also have been part of something altogether more serious.

And caring for a sick child is not about whether or not the CM is a trained first-aider. If my baby was ill, I'd want to care for him myself.

Samlamb, I would expect most schools WOULD call actually if a child in their care was too ill to participate in anything and was crying in consolably.

you are absolutely right samlamb - i can't wait

'And caring for a sick child is not about whether or not the CM is a trained first-aider'

It is in part. Of course you want to be there for your sick baby and he needs you for comfort, but on a medical level, if he did 'take a turn for the worse' and stopped breathing, for example, would you want him with you (assuming you don't know CPR) or with someone trained to administer CPR? I know what I'd choose.

The Op said the child was crying continuously...not "grizzling". They are different things. And Samlamb some kids have Dads too....one parent...or another pre arranged adult could come and SHOULD come to collect an unwell child.

Why should the other children be with a sick child?

Ling I think the age of the child is relevant. If a school age child was crying inconsolably and was too ill too participate in anything then I would expect them to be sent home because it's a sign something is very wrong. It's completely different with a 14 month old though. They cry, their babies, that's what they do. My youngest charge will be whingey and wanting cuddles all day when he has teeth coming through, it's not a reason to call his parents. If the 8 year old, was in tears all day it would be a completely different situation.

All I want to add to the conversation is that I am glad that I don't mind for any of the posters who say they wouldn't want to pick up a child when the minder feels that the child should be at home with their mum/dad.
Thankfully all my parents know that I would only send home if it was for the wellbeing of the child.

but outraged - you are missing the point, again... it is not the cms job to administer cpr - she is a childminder not a casualty doctor or paramedic for goodness sake.

an ill child should be sent home. it is not up to the cm to decide how ill the child is. obviously we use a level of common sense when deciding whether to call a parent but a child who has been upset all day, and has dry nappies and is obviously not doing too well should not be with a childminder. why is that so difficult to understand?

say it turned out the child had something else, dare i say, meningitis, which suddenly developed from the symptoms described to something much more serious, the parent would then be within their rights to say, the cm didn't call me, i wasn't give the choice of whether to take my child to hospital - we just can't win, can we??

No Outraged...the OP said the child "was not herself" that's not "what babies do" at all! As the OP is a CM and therefore experienced I think it is safe to assume she knows what ILL is and what teething is.

To be fair Neo the OP originally said 'has a cold, just generally not happy'. Only after a couple of posts suggesting she didn't need to call the mother did we learn about the parent's illness, the constant crying, the not eating, the not drinking, the dry nappies etc. In a later post the OP said that she'd managed to deal with it.

but you know all that now Outraged, so it's not really relevant that the op didn't mention it in her first post

Well Outraged a bit of drip feeding does not an argument win....unless we doubt the OP's version completely and assume she exaggerated....then it's STILL fair to say that the baby should be at home. Crying continuously is not a happy child. It's probably a child in pain.

Outraged, I have an 18 month old mindee who can be incredibly whingy. But I know every well the difference between that and him actually being unwell. So does his mum, thankfully. No way would I just dismiss a child - whatever their age - crying constantly and in a way that was out of character. In fact, the younger the child the more cautious you should be as they can't verbalise what's wrong with them.