Nanny asks for day off, is refused, and calls in sick anyway

[oranges]

Our nanny asked for today off to greet her boyfriend when he gets back from holiday. I did try to accomodate her request but just couldn't. But her sister has now texted me to say she's not coming in. I have no choice but to believe her but it looks fishy. Can or should I say something? She calls in sick quite often and I've never said anything before than get well soon. And we give loads annual leave- 8 weeks a year, just on the understanding that it's taken at a time that suits us. I have also always said yes before for requests for time off, even if IRS inconvenient but today is really, really tough. Am wondering if we should look at nurseries instead.

I wouldn't do that in a job unless I really didn't give a toss! I would recommend either finding a new nanny or nursery and not continue with this one as she'll think she can walk all over you now (even if she does get a slapped wrist)

www.nhs.uk/chq/Pages/1062.aspx?CategoryID=68&SubCategoryID=158

You can ask for a 'fit note' (not a sick note anymore) for employees who are persistently off - GP might charge for it though, which I guess is a deterrent.

I've worked in jobs where I was required to provide a sick note for even half a day's sickness - but that wasn't in the UK.

I think you need to implement a sickness absence policy. The one at my work states that you have to call in yourself not text or email or get someone to call for you unless of course there's a good reason why you can't.

Then there are certain trigger points where HR gets involved.

Personally I would give her a verbal warning for this as she is so obviously taking the piss.

I wouldn't even bother with starting a sickness policy. She's been there six months so I don't think she has much in the way of rights and seven days off in six months is absurd.

Many moons ago, I used to run club nights. You really, really don't care about your day job when you're doing that - that's where your passion is and it's really exhausting.

So sorry about your FIL :(

7 days off in the first 6 months of employment for one-day illnesses does not show commitment to you or your family.

I would start looking for a new nanny - sounds drastic but if this is her level of performance at the start of her employment it doesn't bode well.

Ok you can talk to her, give her a warning etc but the danger there is that she will improve temporarily and then once she's been with you for 12 months you will have to follow procedures to sack her if her performance goes down again (or be in danger of an expensive unfair dismissal claim).

If you do decide to keep her on you should make sure the contract states the procedure for sickness reporting - you may need to rely on this in future if you have a problem.

I would give her a verbal warning, if she was working for any other company her sickness would be under review by now.

I work for the NHS which is notoriously lax in dealing with employees taking liberties with sickness but even there this suspicious pattern of "one day bugs" would have resulted in action by now.

Thank you. I am now totally in a tizz, as I've just discovered her brother is in a gang (I knew she had a chaotic family, but struck me as very, very determined to improve herself.) and am stupidly worried if this is going to be really bad for my family. Shit.

You need to have one of those chats where you are very clear and firm and ask her whether she is enjoying the job and is adequately committed to it, explain what you expect of her and tell her you will want sick notes from now on.

Your aim is to start being such a strict boss that she will walk away and then you wont need to worry about reprisals!

She has been with you for under one year. Legally you can fire her for no reason. Personally I would tell her her behaviour was unacceptable and you are giving her notice and I would get a new nanny who is committed. There are lots of very good nannies out there who are looking for work, for me that type of behaviour shows complete lack of respect and consideration.

You do not need to go down the verbal warning, written warning, performance improvement process under one years employment. You do however have to provide notice either in lieu or working notice.

I'm intrigued how you have found out that her brother is in a gang!

I would try not to let that worry you - she obviously is trying to make a better life for herself if she's trained to nanny but she clearly isn't taking her responsibilities seriously. I certainly wouldn't let fear of reprisals stop you from getting rid of her. It could be the kick up the arse she needs.

We had exactly this situation with our old nanny. She kept having time off sick, always for what I felt were pretty flimsy reasons (period pain, bad cold etc). She just didn't seem to understand that we needed her to be reliable because our jobs needed us to be reliable too. In our case, I do believe she didn't feel 100% when she called in (or texted also in our case) sick, but she couldn't understand when we said that we still went to work when we felt rough - take some painkillers etc.
Anyway, once I realised that she had had 8 days off whilst working for us (about 7 months) and I had had no time off at all I knew something had to change. As it turned out, she came back from her 2 weeks paid holiday at Christmas and told us she couldn't work Friday afternoon (her 1st day back) as she had a dentist appointment. Neither dh or I could change our days so we said no, she refused to change it and that was the end for us.
As others have said, under a year's service leaves her little room for appeal. We just said we felt the relationship had broken down, we needed to rely on her 100% and paid her 2 weeks notice which she didn't have to work. We didn't have a proper contract though, I still felt what we did was fair. (There are a number of other issues we had, which aren't worth going into here).

Anyway, I found another nanny, who in 9 months had never even hinted at being off sick, is often early and stays a bit later without a moments hesitation. She is also great with the kids (if not a bit better) so really don't be afraid to cut her loose. It is a pain finding new childcare but once you get a good carer, the difference is amazing. Good luck.

as a nanny i wouldn't dream of doing that! knowing i was letting the parents down! if i was you get rid and find a new nanny! The amount of time she's been sick is awful.. sounds to me shes mucking you around!!

If you are really worried about repercussions get rid of her in a day with the appropriate paid notice. Same day, gone, with her replacement lined up, and change the locks.

Nannies tend not to be sick that often - at least I'm not and nannies have commented here in the past that they are not often sick either. When we are sick it tends to be major, so more than just a day off.

Keep an eye on Facebook, Twitter that sort of thing if your nanny uses them, that may help show if they are really sick or just going to meet their boyfriend.

Also, considering that she asked for the day off and you refused and then she has called in sick it would be quite reasonable to say you're struggling to believe her, especially as she didn't even call herself! Do you pay her when she's sick?

Get rid. This story has annoyed me intensely

I would be looking for alternate child care. Your nanny doesnt seem to be making your life easier - she is making it harder.

I know lots of nannies and they go to work when feeling shitty - cold, period pain, its a case of take some medicine and get on with it! If they are really ill then obviously going to work isnt an option.

Sounds like yours is taking the piss big time. Get rid.

If you really want to keep her I would:

When she returns from her sickness (bet it's tomorrow) say you are glad she is better

Formalise a few basic rules in writing including a notice period to be given for a holiday request and your right to decline if inconvenient. Any sickness to be called in herself, failure to do so resulting in loss of days pay.

I would also call the nanny agency to go on the register in the event you need to terminate her contract.

Tell her you are putting DC in a nursery, use any excuse -near your work, money etc, and give her the notice period in your contract. And if you are worried about her brother change the locks, and tell her she can leave today with the pay for her notice period.

No point having a nanny who you are scared of, and is unreliable.

I'm a nanny (On A/l at mo) and can count on my 1 hand how many days off sick I have had in the past 4 years of nannying - and this was due to 2 separate viruses.

I just man up and have a duvet day at work - the kids love the fact that we decamp and can have a lazy day instead of full of activities and my bosses are greatful that they don't need to take a day of work, they usually come home early too :)

I would sit her down explain 7 days in 6 months isn't good enough and that you are putting her on a warning and lets hope that she decides to get better quick.

But can you give warnings and all that over sick days? don't you just have to take their word for it? And look for alternative childcare longer term?

But there must be some limits surely? What would your employer do if you repeatedly phoned in sick? You're not saying you doubt her sickness (although I certainly would for today, and would def not pay her) but that her level of attendance is not acceptable.

I just called her - on a different number. She picked up sounding okay, then said she had been sick since the end of last week (she only works Mon, Tues, wed for me, and someone else on Thurs and Fri). She then said its the change in the weather, and she gets like this, and if her body just goes weak sometimes. I said if there was an underlying cause it needed to be addressed, and that she had really let us down, there were repurcussions for us. She said ok, and that she would be in tomorrow.

I always read the whole of a thread before posting, but this time I will make an exception because it is so long!

She has been working for you for less than a year, you don't need to go through a disciplinary process to sack her so tell her it is not working out and give her a months notice (or whatever is in her contract).

As others have said, most nannies will just dose themselves up and keep on working. They may have an easy day at work to rest a bit but generally we keep going as we know how important it is to our employers to be reliable. As you point out if you get sacked so does the nanny.

I strongly believe she's taking the piss. Change in the weather? Do you pay her for her sick days? If you do, stop! Personally, though, I'd get rid.