Overdue and losing it

[lilysmemo]

Help! I am so confused- according to my lmp date my baby was due 12 days ago- according to my 1 st scan 4 days ago- I have had 3 sweeps, bloody show and NOTHING. I have tried all the usual stuff , nipples, sex. Walking, raspberry leaf etc. The hospital won't induce me for another 10 days and I am now starting to lose it. My daughter came dead on her due date with no interference and a quick labour, now I have myself worked up and think I will have to wait to be induced and may have a slow painful labour. I know I am being irrational and need to relax, but I feel like a failure- and just want my baby here all healthy and lovely. I've hardly stopped crying today , especially as i keep hearing about other babies arriving and think I'm losing my marbles- help me!

lol - LittleMs have just had a loook at your link

I don't use FB but still it's a good one if you keep getting hounded 'have you had the baby yet?' I've already had a few texts from friends asking if I've had the baby yet, but told them I'm still here with bump. Our time will come eventually!

lovechoc: I'm only at 39wks but the foetus is enormous and even my MW wants to get it out... apparently the latent phase is technically labour but not established labour (eg you're less than 3cm, not regular contractions.).

My MW said something along the lines of "look, this is effacing your cervix not opening it, but it still needs to be done. Some people don't feel it but everyone does it. . . so you're getting there"... I just wish I was getting there faster or more visibly!

blackcurrants

how difficult for you, with having to have an injection and the hospital being far away!

My baby is also big, about 10 pounds now(last one was 10 pounds too), and I wanted to have it in a midwives-assisted unit 15 min drive away. After lots of arguments the consultant gave me his blessing if I have the baby by the due date, otherwise they want me to have a medically managed birth in a big hospital with not very good reputation and an hours drive away. Obviously I'm past my EDD now

I still will try to keep any interference during birth to a minimum, my last one was a home birth because no-one realised he would be so big, and it was a great experience, I thought I'd never want to give birth in a hospital again!

I know a woman who had a solo(just with her husband helping) birth at home recently and preparing for it she found out how to check how open her cervix is, apparently you can find instructions on the internet and it's not too difficult.

For me the biggest problem would be reaching round my enormous bump, I don't think there is any position where I could reach to check myself!

I'd be scared of introducing infection, too - don't have sterile latex gloves here, or anything like that - but also I'm not sure what it would tell me. I mean, I know I was around 1cm on Saturday, but I also know you can stay at 1cm for weeks, and go from 0-baby in less than 12 hours - so ...

Plus, I definitely couldn't reach!

Oh god, I'm so weepy at the moment. Last night the midwife called and told me to change my 40wk check from Thurs to Tues, and that she'd need to put me on a monitor for a while, and that we could talk about setting up more monitoring and scans (the placenta) for the 41 week check. I managed to keep it together while we talked, then hung up and absolutely sobbed at the thought of getting to 41weeks while feeling this miserable... DH did a very good line in strong manly shoulder and then heaps of praise for how well I'm handling things. The man's a diamond. But then I had a shitty night's sleep (nightmare that the bump was a stillbirth, followed by me waking up and poking and jiggling at the poor sleeping foetus to get it to MOVE SO I CAN STOP PANICKING!) and here I am, sitting around the house, trying not to cry because we're almost out of milk and it's 33C outside and I can't face leaving the nice airconditioning to go and get more...

Oh heavens, I'm in a state! How's everyone else doing?

Oh dear blackcurrants I do feel your pain - I have put a bit of a rant on the pregnancy board, on BigMommaOfAlmost4 FFS... thread - theres a few of us over there (I am 40+6)

Had a bit of a giggle reading your post about poking and jiggling baby as thats what I have done at times Poor baby must get motion sickness and wonder what the hell is happening.

I am semi-hibernating as I am fed up of people and their "havent you had that baby yet" comments. DOES IT FUCKING LOOK LIKE IT???? Aaargh! Next person that says to me "he will come out when he's ready" is going to get a smack in the mouth - providing I can conjour up the energy...

blackcurrants sobbed at the thought of getting to 41weeks while feeling this miserable

I've been soooo miserable for weeks, and so convinced I wouldn't have this baby late, due to everyone assuring me I wouldn't last long with a belly this size, and hoping that me taking a 6 week course of primrose oil(which I had never done in previous pregnancies where I went to 42 weeks) would help. I thought I just CANNOT last past 39 weeks in this heat(thankfully subsided here a week ago) with legs like tree trunks, pelvis hurting all the time due to SPD and belly as heavy as if a cannon-ball is inside me.

And now I am past 40 weeks and I am STILL here. Every morning I wake up and it is such a disappoitment that the labour didn't start in the night!

Someone has reminded me that if you have a long menstrual cycle, that usually means you have a longer pregnancy, and if you have a short one, you are likely to be early. Seems to be true about me and my friends. If the duration of gestation is directly connected to the length of your cycle, I guess no amount of primrose oil, pineapples or raspberry tea can make a real difference...

Last time when I was overdue as well the midwife said let's wait till the next full moon, that's likely when you will go into labour, it affects many women. And it was true, I did go into labour as soon as the moon was full. Next full moon here is on Sunday, I think, now I just hope that it will help me have my baby on/by Sunday!

LittleMs that's interesting - I hadn't considered the length of the cycle aspect. Mine has always been 26-28 days, so .. huh, I have no idea.

I live in America and it's sodding HOT here - 34C most days and extremely humid. My fingers are all swollen up and painful. Happily I have a massive tub of sorbet!

I'm booked in for induction on Friday thankfully, because I just can't take much more of this Midwife did do a sweep yesterday at the internal exam, and now the pains are even worse. Will just have to grin and bear it for a few more days then it will all be over guaranteed.

Last night was VERY humid - was difficult to sleep.

littlems that's interesting about the length of cycle - usually I'm 31-33 days and sometimes even longer so that tallies up for my circumstances. Would explain the loooooooooooong pregnancy!

Hello everyone, I'm still here too and really fed up. Going for a sweep in half an hour and hoping that might get things going. (Ow, does it hurt??)

I only went to 40+4 with DS1 and today I'm 40+5 - really didn't think I'd get to this stage for some reason. DS1's birthday is on Sunday so I hope this one doesn't arrive on the same day!

DS1 is starting to be really aware that something's up, and is so clingy to me. Not surprising, seeing as I keep bursting into tears! I feel so sorry for him, and keep thinking he's not my baby boy anymore.

And to top it all off, my piles are worse than ever! I can barely walk, so no chance of a brisk stroll to try to get things moving. I'm already in so much pain with them that I can't imagine how it'll be post-birth.

I really am losing the plot

lovechoc

What was your due date? Here (in Leicestershire) I don't think they would agree to an induction until 42 weeks.

I am climbing the walls but I would only consider induction if I knew the cervix was soft and open at least an inch and the baby fully engaged, otherwise it's too much like forcing the baby out which too often goes wrong for everyone.
Unfortunately I cannot be sure myself, but it seems that it does get engaged and then pops out again, I get days when the bump is suddenly high up again pushing against my ribs.

update from hippopo

Hi everyone, sorry not been on for while you can guess why .......

After having sex wed night, acupuncture, reflexology and long walk on thursday i started having twinges 8pm thurs evening. Was in established labour my 3am Fri morn and Henry Michael Merlin arrived 3pm on Fri 16th weighimg 7lb 4oz at home as planned at 41 weeks. We are all well and very happy. Just a little tired and trying to get breast feeding established.

Good luck everyone still waiting xxxxx

How did your sweep go BettyButterKnife?

I had one today too - Bloody hurts doesnt it? Well, not hurts as such, more uncomfortable.

Midwife freaked me out saying she could feel baby's head - It kind of brought home the fact there is a baby there ready to come out!

I've been having some cramping but no show or anything as yet. I am feeling quietly optimistic that I may well avoid induction (booked for Sunday) which would be nice but if I do end up being induced its not catastrophic.

I've been totally fed up and feeling murderous for the last week - since seeing the midwife this afternoon I now feel calm and collected and can see the end is in sight

Hooray hippopo! Congratulations and well done- good luck to all the other mommies- it will happen , and soon I promise :-)

that's what I keep telling myself, lilysmemo - "No one is still pregnant at 10 months"

Heh. Some days it's more helpful than others. On the others, I have cake

I was watching Jackie Chan on Jonathan Ross the other night, and he reckoned his mum was pregnant with him for 12 months! She was a medical marvel, so it seems (or he's full of shit, which I hope is more likely)

41+2 here, off to hospital this morn to discuss induction, I'd imagine, which I'm hoping to put off until Monday. Hopefully they'll offer me a sweep too - my second, maybe this one will do something.

No one is still pregnant at 10 months

Actually I was just thinking that a lot of women who are overdue are pregnant at NEARLY 10 months anyway. 40 weeks is 10 lunar months or 9 months and 10 days, so if you go 2 weeks overdue, you end up being nearly 10 months pregnant.
Women who have their babies at 37 weeks spend five weeks less pregnant than those who deliver at 42 or over, that's a big difference which people don't necessarily appreciate.

I've been up all night with not too frequent, but still regular and quite painful braxton-hicks, thinking the end might be near, all this pain could not be for nothing, and AGAIN, by the morning it all petered out

I just met a friend on the street. This friend had her DD last friday - EARLY. When I got the email I felt miserably sorry for myself and SO jealous.

I forgive her everything now () because her baby is so beautiful, and she looks so very, very, very happy, and so well - that I feel motivated to keep cheerful and keep on truckin' - I'd started to get a bit fed up with my baby before it even came out, and now I"m excited about actually MEETING the baby again.

It was very motivational! We'll get babies at the end of all this! I'd actually forgotten that part cos I was so sorry for myself. The baby part is motivational

You're right, blackcurrants. I know it's going to sound a bit hippy-ish, but we need to try to turn every negative into a positive (hard, at the moment!).

Sweep went ok, MW said I'm 2cm dilated but don't think the cervix is particularly soft or effaced. I did think I had a bit of cramping but not enough to get excited about. But I did have a massive show at about 2.30pm today.

Trying to keep mobile despite the piles - painful, but I don't want to be induced. I'm booked in for Friday for assessment so it wouldn't be until this time next week, I don't think.

But whatever happens, every minute is a minute closer! Hang in there!

Anyone still here? Or is it just me??

Someone sent me this article which I think made me feel better, better at least than the unhelpful conversation I had with my mum last night where she told me about a friend of hers who said babies put on half a pound a week at this stage, and that her friend opted for an epidural and would recommend I do too, and that the more overdue they go the more likely they are to have eczema. FFS!!! why did she think that would be something I'd want to hear?!

I'm still here, I'm definitely still here.

I can't believe friend who've had kids are also going "haven't you had that baby yet?" when I log into gmail in the morning. My sig this morning says, in screamy capitals, "I WILL TELL YOU WHEN I'VE GIVEN BIRTH."

As if we wouldn't say anything! God, why are people so ANNOYING!

[goes-on-murderous-rampage-while-still-in-pajamas emoticon]

I'm still here! The midwife should contact me on Monday about when she can offer me a sweep, though I don't have much hope for that, think it'll only work if 'it's nearly there' anyway, like all these methods.

BettyButterknife, I gave birth closer to 42 weeks 3 times and none of my children had eczema, and after 40 weeks my weight and measurements tended to go down rather than increase! I think they all gained their final weight by about 40 weeks and then just stayed the same.

blackcurrants, I have a friend(with 3 children) who when I didn't answer the home before 8AM the other day - was still in bed - started calling me on the mobile, I thought it was an emergency!
Turns out she just just thought that me not answering the phone that early in the morning was sure to mean I was having a baby, and it meant it was appropriate to call me on the mobile. As if that was what I'd be doing while in labour - taking phone calls! And I did tell her 20 times I'd text her once I had the baby!! I never pestered her like that when she went to 42 weeks!!!

Fingers crossed that the full moon (soon after midnight on Sunday) will entice our babies out as it happened to me last time true to the predictions of my midwife

I'm having far fewer training contractions now than I had even 2-3 weeks ago, but maybe it's just 'calm before the storm'?

BettyButterknife, great link (even though I knew most of what was said in that post). I wish there was a way to make the link to that blog 'sticky' all over the internet on pregnant mums forums.

I also wish I didn't tell anyone my due date! That's the advice I'm going to give to all my newly pregnant friends, to be as vague about it as possible, or add a week or two!

I went in for a sweep on Wednesday morning and by 6pm was having regular contractions 5-7 mins apart. Phoned MLU at 7.30pm in extreme pain (DH had to do all the talking!) and we got to MLU at 9.15pm (had to wait on relative arriving for childcare for DS1) by this point I was 6cms dilated and at 11pm DS2 literally just popped out! Easier birth than first time by a long shot.All is well.

Good luck to anyone else still hanging on - it will happen. I was all prepared to be induced yesterday(!!) but it all kicked off on Wednesday due to a midwife giving me a 'good stir' as she put it.

Meant to add that my waters broke at 8.30pm and I just knew that was it. Definately wasn't a false alarm!!

It will happen for you - just have faith!