Overdue and losing it

[lilysmemo]

Help! I am so confused- according to my lmp date my baby was due 12 days ago- according to my 1 st scan 4 days ago- I have had 3 sweeps, bloody show and NOTHING. I have tried all the usual stuff , nipples, sex. Walking, raspberry leaf etc. The hospital won't induce me for another 10 days and I am now starting to lose it. My daughter came dead on her due date with no interference and a quick labour, now I have myself worked up and think I will have to wait to be induced and may have a slow painful labour. I know I am being irrational and need to relax, but I feel like a failure- and just want my baby here all healthy and lovely. I've hardly stopped crying today , especially as i keep hearing about other babies arriving and think I'm losing my marbles- help me!

A normal pregnancy is 37-42 weeks. Try looking at it like that. You are not overdue.

It's so miserable to be hot and exceedingly pregnant. I wouldn't hesitate to do anything and everything that makes your life easier. If you want to sit in the bath and eat chocolate all day then find a way to do it.

It'll be over soon. I know that's stating the bleedin' obvious but it will only be a matter of days.

lilysmemo I am with you there, I am 40 + 4 and feel like I am going crazy. My DD was born at 37+5 which was so great, none of this waiting around. I feel quite depressed about being overdue, have had sweep too and bloody show, but now too am facing induction next week which I so wanted to avoid. It does feel it will never happen doesn't it?

I think its really hard to be rational and can't help thinking the more stressed I get about it the longer I am delaying labour...I never realised being overdue was so miserable

At least slightly comforting to know there are others out there who feel the same...

Hi Ladies, 40+2 here and have already spent alot of the last two days in tears... I know they don't generally arrive on the due dates, but DS was +15 days (with a failed induction ending up in EMCS) and I'm terrified that this one will end up the same way, with the additional burden of already having a 20 month DS to look after and the fact that DH is now working away from home.

I know that worryng won't make it happen, but I am sick to death of all these people telling me to relax, that the baby will come when it's ready! How the fu*k do they know that?? There's an equally good chance that it won't be ready when the induction date arrives and it'll be a re-run of the last time!! Piss off with your platitudes! But at the same time I know they're just trying to make me feel better which is why I can't scream at them....

If you're losing your marbles Lilysmemo then mine are gone too...

Actually - mine are definitely gone!

40+5 and feel like I'm losing it too if it's any consolation. I can't bear to answer text messages or the phone to one more 'any news?' communication, bursting into tears all the time as I so want a natural birth and feel like it's all slipping through my fingers. Have felt nauseaous and crampy for days on end so can't decide what I feel like doing, or what I can be arsed to do. Only people I can meet up with are ones with newborns and I can't bear it as I'm so jealous at the moment.

Thank you ladies for your views, it really has helped to know I am not alone, and not mad. Have had tightenings in my abdomen this am and more 'show' so fingers crossed for us all- especially as today is my sister's birthday, and she is fantastic ! Good luck to you all, hopefully this time next week we will all be exhausted and emotional for different reasons xxx

You sound like me, I went 14 days over and NOTHING. Gave in to induction as so miserable/ pressure but it was fine. I was so overdue that one lot of gel kick-started a pretty normal labour. If it does get to it and you decide to go for it do keep in mind that many inductions do run very smoothly and aren't as bad as all the horror stories everyone tells you!

Bloody hell- they want you to go 22 days overdue? Am I reading that correctly? My hospital when MENTAL when I was 10 days over, I held out until 14 days (basically by not turning up and not arranging an appointment 'til then).

No, by scan date it's 14 days overdue (so not even overdue technically). The LMP date is only a rough guide until the scan provides a more accurate picture.

You don't have to be induced. You can ask for expectant management where they monitor daily to make sure everything is well and you can allow labour to happen naturally.

And induction isn't always that bad.

I was under the impression that dates were more accurate by lmp than by scan- which makes me 40+ 13 today. Saw the mw this am , she did another sweep but advised me to go to the hospital if I am at all worried as she was confused why they have not considered my lmp date in their calculations- totally confusing- but I honestly don't see how a scan can be more accurate when all babies are different and a mm can make a huge difference in dates

No the lmp is not more accurate. A baby in the first trimester generally develops at exactly the same rate. The dating scan does have a margin of error but only a few days either side. They then use the 20 week scan to confirm their findings from the first scan and adjust accordingly. Assuming all babies develop similarly in those first weeks, the scan enables them to see how developed the baby actually is.

Look at it this way... I have a 26 day cycle and ovulate on day 9. My friend has a 35 day cycle and ovulates on day 25. If we both start our periods today and conceive this month (assuming conception on the day we ovulate though this isn't always the case at all), my baby will be conceived in 9 days time, hers won't be conceived for 25 days yet, giving 16 days difference between the gestation of our babies. If you scan me in 6 weeks time, you will see a 6wk old baby developing, perhaps with a heartbeat. You scan my friend in 6 weeks time, you probably would see very little indeed as she would technically only be 4 weeks pregnant. That's over 2 weeks difference, a larger margin of error that would be expected from a dating scan.

That's what they just told me at the hospital- I wish they'd bothered to explain earlier as you read so much stuff in books and online- even some mw's have different opinions- still , seems I am just 2 days over 40 weeks and naturally or not I will have my baby within 10 days. Thanks so much for bothering to reply on this thread x

You sound so utterly fed up. It's hot too which makes it difficult. Try and do whatever you can to make things easier. Don't feel pushed to induce if all is well and you want to labour naturally.

And come back and tell us all about your lovely newborn and how it was all worth it.

I really really know how you feel - my kids were;
ds1 12 days overdue, induced
dd 14 days overdue, resisted induction for homebirth
ds2 8 days overdue
ds3 12 days overdue

Dd was born in the 37 degree heat of August 2003, and it is NOT pleasant being so pregnant, sympathies to you all!

If it helps at all, ds2 was born 3 hours before we were due to go in for induction - the previous day my mw gave me a fairly vigorous sweep - she said she had been quite 'rough' (and it was EXTREMELY uncomfortable), simply because she knew I wanted a homebirth. Anyway, it worked, because that was in the afternoon, and went into labour that night.

Good luck - hope you all have your babies soon!

Mw has made an appointment for me to have a sweep on Monday, I'll be 40 +7. I'd rather wait until Wednesday. Does anyone foresee any problems if I ask to change to Wednesday appointment? Or do you think I should just go for it on Monday?
The heat really isn't helping, was going to try another bout of mercy sex this eve to see if things get going but it won't be pleasant in this heat!

OP, I was induced with both my sons at 12 days overdue. Both labours were fine and as far as I know just like a 'natural' labour.

I did get very depressed though with both once they were overdue, and I think it has something to do with the placenta not working quite as well as it should!

Good Luck and congratulations on you're imminent arrival!

Mookie- u don't have to have a sweep at all if u don't want to. I have now had 4, no result, but didn't experience any pain or discomfort with any of them - good luck to you xx

I don't know what to do, yesterday I was sure I was going to postpone it. Today I am a hormonal mess again, wish I could stop spontaneously bursting into tears, and think I can't take much more of this. I know it's ridiculous because I'm not even that far over my DD. I would like to just happily potter about ignoring it but the mood swings are awful.
Keep getting 'signs' cramps, back ache, nausea etc but then these die off to nothing. Any advice welcome-support only those please as I'm pretty delicate!

i went 9 days over with DD and it drove me mad! but remember ladies you've patiently waited 9 months so another 2 weeks won't kill you even if you feel it will. DD was so much stronger than the other babies i know that were born on or before due date, i think that extra time really did her some good.

Also i think in france normal gestation is counted as 41 weeks, so you're only really a couple of days overdue. I think they should adopt this policy in the UK to stop us all going mad when the due date arrives and no baby comes.

Try and relax your LO's are in the safest place they will ever be. you'll have the rest of your lives to worry about them

Oh mookie- I feel your pain, really. It really is a form of madness- it's like looking forward to a holiday but the travel company keeps moving the dates. I have had all the symptoms too- and what's more frustrating is my daughter just came on the day I expected her to, no drama, no weeks of pressure, cramps, contractions, backache etc. Be brave and I will too, it will be soon and when we are holding our little babies all this will be forgotten xxx

Oh thank you, it's so nice to know that someone else feels the same. Woke up with a really strong vision of feeding a baby this morning-hoping it's a sign but trying not to think about it too much.
Going to go ahead with the stretch and sweep tomorrow, I guess if it's meant to work it will and if not it won't!
I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you too, lilysmemo, thank you for your kind words xx

hi ladies, I'm 40+6 and feeling quite sad about it I'm booked for a sweep on Tuesday and we'll see what happens. I was really hoping for a home birth, we have the pool all set up but I might end up going to hospital anyway. I know it's one of those things one cannot predict but feeling a bit gutted anyway. Ah, I'm not having ANY symptoms so that's depressing as well.

Best of luck to all of us!

Hi everyone,

You all have my sympathy. I too am over due, am only 3 days over but it seems like more. Also have a throat infection to content with which is last thing I need.

I am also hoping for a homebirth so hope things get going within the week!

Have been getting a few twinges but trying not to get hopes up. Have had rasp leaf tea, pineapple, bouncing on ball. But cannot find the energy to go walking or do the deed. May have to investigate turkey baster .

Good luck eveyone x

Well ladies- good news, my 8lb 12 oz gorgeous daughter Nancy Myrtle came this am at 5:02, after a quickish labour- there is light at the end of the tunnel- stay strong! You can do it

Congratulations that is lovely news. Well done and wishing you all the best for your first few days. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx