how did you prepare yourself mentally for the --agony-- --pain-- er, I mean intensity of childbirth...?

[makipuppy]

I'm hoping to deliver our baby without an epidural.

How did you prepare yourself for the pain, or what did you do with your mind to help you through it?

Dp will be outside the delivery room. I respect his decision and have never tried to sway him on it, but it's quite daunting to think I have to face it essentially on my own (SIL will probably be there, but we're not incredibly close - I just think she's very nice and down to earth and has done it twice herself).

I've got two weeks to go

BTW, I forgot to say my partner was great - he did all the right things, inflating the pool, filling it, handing me my dressing gown at the right moment, holding a drink with a straw out to me etc, but I didn't speak to him at all. I found I went right into myself, if you know what I mean - I didn't really notice anything or anyone around me, I was concentrating on breathing steadily to a count of 4 in, and 4 out, through each contraction, relaxing, drinking water, next contraction etc so I can't say that I even noticed what my partner or midwife was doing! You may not need a doula! I did find the midwife saying "I can see the head, ooh, and it's got hair" and "You're doing really well" etc really encouraging though. I suspect most midwives will do that anyway but if you feel it might help you, tell your midwife that you'll find positive encouragement or descriptions of what's happening helpful, and write it into your birth plan in case you get a different midwife to the one you've been seeing.

I read:
Childbirth Without Fear by Grantly Dick-Read
Unassisted Birth by Laura Shanley
Understanding and Teaching Optimum Foetal Positioning by Jean Sutton

And I ate well, stayed fit, and went to an Active Birth workshop.

Must have worked, as I had a midwife-free, pain-free birth :)

I haven't read all the thread so sorry if this repeats anything anyone else has said. I had a CS with dd1, and persuaded the drs to let me have a go at a VBac with dd2 4 years later. I went to ante-natal yoga and read up loads. Took some music.with earphones so I could just focus on me..hired a doula as I thought dh would be crap at knowing what to do..tho in actual fact he rubbed my back really effectively through it. I remember reading up on some breathing technique where you vocalise your outbreath and this really helped for some reason. A few times, I did 'lose' it and started screaming h pain but the midwife instructed me to pull all that energy inside and use it to push instead. And then it was all fine. I wouldn't have missed it for the world. In fact, I now think back and think it wasn't that painful. You need to read loads of positive birth stories and access birth sites. I think the pain intensifies if you are scared and I did loads in advance to try and mitigate any anxiety I felt. I am not an earthy treehugger either but an academic who knows how to research. Oh, and I didn't lie on my back..I stood for most of the time, doing some kind of pelvic rollling when the contractions hit..and then gave birth on all fours. It worked somehow. And, I felt amazingly good to have done it with no medicalised pain relief or gas and air..just me and my body really. As soon as dd2 slithered out, I thought 'Wow! I could do all that over again!!'..and I felt amazingly powerful.