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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

is there anyone here who have had lovely births????

210 replies

psychomum5 · 15/08/2008 12:07

there are so many sad sad threads here of women who have had truly awful times, and someone (sorry, can;t think who now), commented that we only really here the awful stuff and never the nice births.

so, in some type of helpful way, maybe we can have a thread where women can go that can be an encouragement that some births can be lovely and fabuous........VB and CS births.

will post this now and then come and say mine

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halogen · 15/08/2008 22:20

I only have one child (daughter, 23 months) but I had a great experience when she was born. It did hurt at the end but none of it hurt nearly as much as I'd been led to believe it might and I managed with just gas and air and forgot to ask for anything else (and I am a big wuss about headaches etc). Went to hospital at about 6 pm after approx 12 or 13 hours of contractions and she was born at 10pm. I spent a lot of the day in a weird state and can't exactly tell you what happened or what I was doing but I remember with absolute clarity the moment when she slithered out of me and was finally here. It was the best moment of my life bar none. I wouldn't swap a minute of it, not even the episiotomy, which was not nice but completely worth it to meet my daughter. I'd do it all again in a heartbeat.

Oh, and I did have one moment of blinding insight about ten minutes before she was born when I thought 'Christ, why on earth do people do this twice?!' but I now know why - my daughter is the best thing that ever happened to me. Sorry if that sounds a bit soppy but it is true.

psychomum5 · 15/08/2008 22:21

sherbertdip, it is women like you I feel the need for a thread like this. there are so many threads that can quite honestly scare the bejeezus out of pregnant women, (and that it not a knock on the women posting on them, they need and should be able to post about and get support for their traumatic labours/births), but there are just not enough threads (I feel) that celebrate GOOD and WONDERFUL labours and births.

we need more, we should say that some women have fab times, and love their births, and look back at them with fondness and a glow about the memory.

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sherbetdipdab · 15/08/2008 22:29

Well I wanted you to know that this thread and all the posts on it are much appreciated!

I agree that we need to have both sides of the story, sometimes we all just seem to talk about the negative things but I really feel there is a place for the lovely and wonderful things in life to be appreciated too

I am currently swimming in a sea on 'nice' hormones, I keep telling DH how much I love him so please indulge me, I am not always like this!

psychomum5 · 15/08/2008 22:34

you love those happy hormones girl

and I hope your DH is loving them too!

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marjean · 15/08/2008 22:56

What a lovely thread. I've had two wonderful wonderful births - both at home. Very different but just amazing. No complications, no drama but completely miraculous. Bit painful but very empowering and I was very well supported by dh and fabulous mws. I see my body in a different light since having children and their birthdays will be the best days of my life. Bit soppy, but true!

Poledra · 15/08/2008 22:56

For anyone about to be induced, I was induced for dd3 (4 weeks ago) and it was by far the best of my births. I wasn't too pleased about induction, as I was hoping to have a less 'medicalised' birth following an em c-section and a forceps birth but the obs did not want me going overdue (for reasons I won't bother going into here).

My waters were broken to try and get things started, then DH and I were sent off for a walk, something to eat etc. Came back afer 2 hours, on monitor, some minor contractions but nothing exciting. DH and I played cards for another 2 hours (and I whupped his sorry ass, which I thought was pretty good for a woman in early labour) then the obs came in and said they felt that I'd had long enough (4.5 hrs) to get going on my own and they'd like to start up the drip. Would I like an epidural first? The obs and mw were really good - they went through the options then left DH and I alone to decide. As there was still a real possibility that I might end up with another section, (and I am a wimp) we went for the epidural then the drip. So, epi put in, drip started once the epi was working. Then the lovely mw turned off all the lights except one, brought dh a pillow and told us to both get some sleep while the drugs did their work. So we did.

After a couple of peaceful hours, I was really starting to feel the pressure. At about 02.30, the mw examined me and said 'Oh, yes, I can feel the head, you're ready to push.' She was so relaxed and non-interfering IYKWIM that she had done (or even requested to do) any VEs between 2cm dilated and 10cm. Once she got everything ready, I started pushing on her instruction (and she was so not frightened to give DH his orders too ). Everything was just so controlled and calm, it was amazing. Once dd3 was out as far as her arms, the mw said 'Come on, you catch her now, she's yours' so I reached down and pulled her out the rest of the way and up onto my chest, 29 minutes after I started pushing - it makes me feel a bit teary even now to think of it. DH was given no choice about cutting the cord either. After that, we were left alone with dd3 to get to know her. Honestly, I am going to write to the hospital in praise of this mw as she turned what could have been a negative experience of being induced into one of the most wonderful experiences of my life.

Poledra · 15/08/2008 22:57

Ooh, sorry, my post's a bit long - still on a bit of a high about this one, can you tell?

psychomum5 · 15/08/2008 22:59

poledra, that is a wonderful birth story

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cheerfulvicky · 15/08/2008 23:37

Wow, this thread is so wonderful, thank you. I'm due on Monday with my first and alternate between blind panic and delicious anticipation of meting my baby boy. But some of the stories I've heard on MN, well they scared me! I just need some balance to give me perspective on the massive spectrum that is childbirth, and this thread is it.
I know I won't go into labour until I relax and stop being afraid, so thanks for helping me on my way to letting go of my nervousness

psychomum5 · 16/08/2008 00:08

oooh....we may get a brand new baby story then

I am so glad that you feel a little calmer from this thread.....t'was my aim

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MamaMimi · 16/08/2008 00:40

Although it was a week before I was due I was going to be induced as the baby wasn't growing at the correct rate anymore.

When the MW came to induce me on the maternity ward she examined me first and then went off to get another MW to examine me for a second opinion. The 2nd MW confirmed what she had thought, that I was already 7cm dilated!!

I walked to the labour ward where I had a picnic with my OH and my mum, tucking into strawberries and reading mags.
I had NO pain, didn't feel any contractions, didn't even consider pain relief.

I felt a slight twinge whilst I was bouncing on a birthing ball and eating a pack of walkers worcester sauce crisps, and that was because it was time to start pushing. But the MW had to tell me that cos I had no urge to push whatsoever.

My daughter was born half an hour later.

I can honestly say it was a completely painless experience - not normal I know - but brilliant.

MamaMimi · 16/08/2008 00:48

BTW I was completely relaxed about the whole thing beforehand, I think this really helps.

I finished work on Friday (end of summer term) and had dd on the following Tuesday.
I think keeping going helped her to work her way down cos in the last few days before I had her I felt alot of pressure very low down, like if I sneezed she would just pop out (which is practically how it happened ironically!)

MamaMimi · 16/08/2008 00:50

Off to BD now. Want to see if I have the same experience twice!!

OurHamsterisevil · 16/08/2008 00:57

DS1 was 4hrs, with Gas and air only. Despite having a 3rd degree tear it was fine. I had no problems with my stiches or recovery.

DS2 was at home less than 2 hours and just amazingly wonderful.

Reesie · 16/08/2008 05:33

I look back at my labour fondly. I have one dd and just found out in pg again. I was delivered by a close friend who I trusted completely (she was a midwife - I wasn't a freebirther!!!). The labour lasted about 6 hours and was painful but manageable (with gas and air!). The pushing for me was completely painless - I just felt some pressure as her head was crowning. I pushed her out quite quickly. I'm a midwife and I've spent years learning and supporting women through labour so it was really interesting to go through it myself! I do think that it helped that I was very excited to go into labour (rubbish pregnancy - 2 weeks overdue) and was really calm about it. Also - I expected a bit of pain so didn't feel scared which def helped me cope. I'm looking forward to doing it again (although a bit nervous about being pregnant again)

psychomum5 · 16/08/2008 09:24

I am going to add my first birth story here.....it was 14ys ago tho, so I my waffle and not be conctrete on timings, but it is still very very clear in my mind as I still remember it with a glow!!!

labour for me started on easter monday.....at 3pm. I know this as I had predicted it during my pregnancy. may sound odd, but I had not had an easy time and this was pre-mobiles.......I used to get DH to ring from work (a building site so he had to go find a phone box for this........how ^pre-historic). anyhoo.....I told him monday and tuesday was the only days to worry over.........made me feel better at least.

I digress (I do that a lot)

by 9pm, contractions were every 5mins, and as I had had a rough time, and spent time in hospital, we rang and were asked to go in prepared to stay.......

I was 1cm dilated on arriving, and altho most women would go home to get going more at this point, I didn;t and was sent up to the ante-natal ward.......it did mean that DH could go home and sleep ready for me needing him, and I felt more comforting being close to midwives I had to know and trust already.

I contracted thro the night.......I had lots of baths, played cards with the midwives, I was in too much pain to sleep but not enough to need anything, so really, me being apart from DH was a good thing as I could get on with it on my own for a while.....which looking back was lovely as I spent it talking to my baby.

8am I was examined again, fully efaced (sp?) but still only 1cm dilated so they gave me a sweep.

DH arrives about half hour later......and by then I am needing him as my labour is in my back........oooh, that hurt, but he massaged me (hard....so hard I actually had thumb prints on my back the following day and he had very sore thumbs!!), and the massage helped and we were doing this together.

10/11ish I was feeling the need for more than 'just' massage, so they called down to delivery and up came my two fave midwives......and I relaxed so much. I was thrilled, I had hoped and hoped for them and there they were.

they asked me my plans, and all I said was no cuts, no catheter, and 100% being told what was going on so I could feel in control.

we got down and they examined me.....I was 4cms, so in established labour.........off we go.

they put me into a rocking chair (soooooo nice), and taught me how to use gas & air (first few mouthfuls were odd), but then I felt as tho I had had 10 G&T's......I was LOVING it, so much so, they were hard pressed to get me off it later!

short while later, I feel wet........we thought waters but no, it was blood! now, at this point, I had a small panic, but they explained so well that it was a huge show, and that can be bloody.......I had no idea until that point, so any of you first-timers.....shows can be bloody.....do not panic!!!!

around 2ish, as I now know with the benefit of 4 more births, I went into transition....and decided I was not haivng a baby anymore and I was off home.....and was rather determined!! DH and the midwives steered me back to bed, the midwives obviously realising I was going into transition, and got me set up for my final examination.....and yes, I was 10cms and just waiting for the urge to push.

oh, another tip....in transition I do not have any sense of how close people are, and when I go to tell them I feel sick, I often am, on them......DH often needed a change of t-shirt because of me and transition....oh, and I say extraordinary things and tell people to stop patronising me. DH likens me to the girl from the exhorsist (sp?), (without the head spinning!).

anyhooo.......back to my birth. the midwives were fantastic....they told me how to push, encouraged me, coached me, helped me. they told me at each point what they were doing, and I at no point felt as tho I was anything other than 100% in their care....and they cared.

towards the end, I was tiring, baby was tiring (heart rate was dropping IIRC), and was begging them to cut me, get baby out, I had enough now. they still kept me going, and at this point did say I was going to need a little help, they thought maybe an epesiotamy (sp?), but they knew my thoughts.......what did I think now. I said yes, so they asked again, so that I was sure and so I never at any point felt as tho they were going against my wishes. again I said yes, and they did........and out came my darling baby girl, 8lb 8oz of her, she was mine.......oh what a high:0. they delivered her onto my tummy, I picked her up, and the first thing she did was reach out and touch my face as tho to say "oh, hello, you must be my mummy".....to say we all were tearful would be an understatement.....even the midwives were flapping each other...."did you see, did you see".....I felt so blessed and and tho I was the first mum they had ever delivered.

I still grin thinking back on my birth of my Megan Ami.......she was a delight from the off, and my brith could not have gone sweeter (IMHO)....I had wonderful care, and everything stayed in control. my cut healed (took a time and I was sore), but it healed nicely. breastfeeding was a challenge, but it all paled in the glow I had from my new baby.

and it meant that all my next births, altho not quite as fantastic in some area's, never shocked me or demorilised me.....I carried my fantastic experience thro each of them, and we eventually learned the tip of me being sick on DH and he needing t-shirts in my labour bag!

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WindUpBird · 16/08/2008 10:36

Thanks for starting this thread, it's something I feel very strongly about; that pregnant women should read ALOT of positive birth stories.
I've had 2 dcs, both in hospital. Both births were special but my second birth to DS was, for me, amazing. I will mention DD's birth here as, though not as positive, I feel that it could have been a very straightforward birth if I had been more prepared and aware beforehand.
With DD I had a couple of days of pre-labour (I didn't know this was possible at the time so I hadn't a clue what was going on or how long it could go on for). Established labour was fine and I coped fine with just G&A but by the time it got to the pushing stage I was exhausted and had no urge to push so the midwife immediately put me on a drip to speed things up. I just wanted to have a rest then start again...but wasn't allowed. So after 2 hours of pushing, and DH and midwives shouting at me to PUSH DD born by ventouse. A happy result as we were both fine. But, to echo what psychomum5 says, I felt a loss of control (and a feeling that I just couldn't do it) which impacted greatly on me dealing mentally with the birth process.

Pregnant with second child I did a lot more reading of positive birth stories (can highly recommend Ina May Gaskin's book ,plus learning a bit of hypnobirthing I felt I had a better understanding of what happened first time round and how to deal with the second stage of labour (i.e. I probably could have had a half hour sleep and a snack, then maybe I'd have had the energy to get on with it myself!).
I planned a home waterbirth and did lots of relaxation during pregnancy and early labour. Result was a very quick and easy labour, had to transfer to hosp as midwife suspected baby had passed meconium. DS arrived within 1.5 hours of getting to hospital after only 7 mins second stage. The contractions really weren't that bad, I was in my own little world, really. I didn't have to push at all, I just breathed him out and it was, really the best moment of my life. I was on such a natural high for about 3 days. I was just so impressed by the whole process
So, I guess I'm saying that for me, it was important to read a lot of positive stories, and also to learn some very basic relaxation techniques from the Ina May book (this should be handed out with the bounty bags imo) and hypnobirthing. I am certain that the combination of these led me to have an incredibly special and empowering birth.
Sorry, that was long and probably quite gushy, trying to type quickly while DS naps.

peasoup · 16/08/2008 10:40

Yes, mine was good-very exciting. I didn't mind the pain just screamed my head off which was fun. Cracked jokes and really loved it actually; must be a wierdo...

lauraloola · 16/08/2008 11:22

I screamed my head off too! I never thought I would but it felt really good - I think it scared dp

pippylongstockings · 16/08/2008 11:50

I am still amaxed at the great things our bodies can do and feel the power of positive thought and beleiving you can do it is a great influence.
I was apprehensive for my first birth but hoped through trying to remember my yoga and concentrating breathing out I would stay at home as long as possible -

What I didn't expect was by the time we rang the midwife and she came to us I would already be 9cm! As I felt I couldn't move by then I went for a home birth (not planned) but after 2 hours of pushing I had to go to hospital and had my DS1 about 20min later. Did it all without even gas & air as it made me really sick. Did have G&A for my stiches and it was great then!

2nd time round all a whirr - Couple days over due and my DH wants to go to work but I feel a bit twingy so ask him to stay on for another cup of tea - fast forward to me deciding I was in labour and ring my mum who's 15 min away to looks after DS1. Go upstairs to get dressed, waters break on the bedroom floor and I suddenly can't stand up. I swore alot as I wanted to go to a Midwife lead unit 30 min away which it is clear I wouldn't make - my mums arrives just in time as DH has rung 999 to get me to hospital - once there throw all my clothes off, get on all 4's. Not really aware of anyone, just trying to catch my breath - the midwife says 'I can see the head keep panting!' No pushing just sort of panted him out 3 min later my lovey ds2 born in the caul.

DH said it was amazing as DS2 was so clean and peaceful.

Still amazes me now. It was great.

pippylongstockings · 16/08/2008 11:51

Alot of amazings there...

pippylongstockings · 16/08/2008 11:52

Alot of amazings there...

natalier · 16/08/2008 11:53

im due to be induced on wed nite at 13 days over and im panicking tht the pain is going to be soooo bad. can anyone tell me if being induced is ok? x

MrsBick · 16/08/2008 11:54

I had a lovely birth.
i was induced, went into hospital at 8pm, had the prostin at 11pm.
contractions came thick and fast within half an hour.

midwife didn't think it could happen so fast so sent me to have a walk then a bath.
went from 2cm dilated to 8cm in 20 mins and was rushed (wrapped in my towel dripping water down the corridor) to delivery suite.

Too late for epidural to be effective etc, had had pethidine earlier.

My lovely DS was born at 4:48am, weighing 8lb13.

i will never forget that almost orgasmic feeling when the head and shoulders are out and the rest of their little body just slithers out!

DH was there all the way thru, running my bath counting me thru contractions and at one point holding my IV in!!

Best night of my life and we were home by teatime!

psychomum5 · 16/08/2008 13:04

natalier......I was induced for my last four (my first birth was my only spontanious labour).

I can honestly say that it was no worse than my first wonderful birth except I did not have the 12+hrs of pre-labour first.

with DD2 they put in the gel to 'ripen me' at about 9pm, so that they could start me off properly in the morning.......I started contracting by 11pm, needed pain relief by 3am, got to the labour ward at 3.40am (I think), she was born by 4.18am. and pushing took 5mins!!! (oh, in fact went from 5cms dilated to having her within 10mins). I did tear, along my epesiotomy scar, but that healed well, altho the stitching left a bit to be desired.

DD3 was induced but because of other issues (SPD due to falling and doing the splits five days previous ), I could not walk about to help, so needed several lots of gel and an epidural......from needing pain relief tho to giving birth was 5hrs, and again, 5cms to birth was 10mins!

induced again with both my boys (other reasons but medically needed), and for them both, the gel was put in at about 9pm, contractions started about 10pm, both times needed to go down to the delivery suite about 3am.........DS1 was born at 9.52am, DS2 (these are seperate births BTW), was born at 4.49am.

I can honestly say, induction does not mean awful labours.......each time I was kept well informed by the midwives, they listened to me (even when I told them they were pants, couldn;t do their jobs, looked funny.......all in transition each time), they stuck with me, helped me stay in control, and gave me, my baby, and DH a birth to look back on and about.

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