c-section a must, if refused i'll need to pay, advise on getting c-section on nhs or paying the nhs in wales, or private c-section in wales

[Ema76]

a c-section is a must for me.
i am really worried that i will be refused one on the nhs. if so i have to have options. can i pay the nhs to give me one? really want to have my baby in wales too which restricts me as it seems more private c-sections are done in London.
Does anyone know of a good private hospital in wales (south in particular) and how much it would cost?

Many thanks for your help.

Fio, I see your "risk of hysterectomy and pulmonary embolism" cards and I quietly place the "risk of fistula and urinary/faecal incontinence" cards on the table.

If the OP has researched the risks she is aware of the medical risks from both vaginal and c-section births and has made her mind up as to which set of risks she will be taking, subject to counselling naturally.

To my mind the statistics regarding the number of female medical staff that opt for an elective c-section, naturally available without all the barriers placed in their way that josephine public has to overcome, is very interesting and I know the theory is that this is because they only see the end results of vaginal births with complications.

I feel sorrier for you, Ema, because you fail to understand that your fear of vaginal childbirth is a very real psychological issue which can indeed be very symptomatic of antenatal depression.

You're really selling yourself short getting so worked up about this and not getting the help you need.

Not to mention that it can cause low birth weight.

Finding an NHS consultant who will agree to ELCS before 39 weeks when you have no serious medical condition, well, best of luck! It's possible that you could go into labour before 39 weeks and then you'd have to deal with it.

Otherwise, be prepared to pay.

yes i read about female medical staff (consultant obs) too and lots opt for elective cs, interesting.

Ema - Just thinking about this, I really think you should look at the privte options.

An el. CS isn't everyone's birthplan, but it can be a wonderful experience - mine was, but I had been totally truthful with my consultant about what I wanted. He listened to me and was excellent (would happily recommend him, but he's in London)

You do also have to consider that the baby will have to be delivred earlier (usually week 39) so there can be some problems with lungs... It's not a massive risk, but I mention it because you do need to have regular contact with your consultant to ensure you get the timings right (I had a late scan at 35 weeks to check everything and my CS still had to be moved by a week!!!)

I seriously think you would feel fr better if this decision had been made and you didn't have to continue to worry about it.

The NHS will offer counselling but it will be (IMO) to try and change your mind. If that is not what you want, I would recommend the private options. But, please be aware that even some private units might be anti el CS without some counselling.

I went to the Portand. I'd recommend it, from my experience, but I appreciate others have different view points.

Does it have to be Wales? Would London not be an option?

i don't agree expat with saying that it is symptomatic of depression but thank you for your comments. i am not depressed and never have been, not to say i won't be in the future that it. if made to have a vbirth - i would def have some form of depression however.

I wouldn't want to go with a consultant who just said yes to an elective tbh if they didn't at least try to find a way of alleviating whatever was causing the fear of vaginal birth.
If they didn't discuss it with you and try to help with anxieties etc then they are not doing their job effectively.
I know this is not what you want them to do, but it is their job to give you all the facts and recommend the best treatment as they see it.

i live in wales and it would be easier for us and family. so ideally yes but will go to the Portland or another London hospital if necessary. thank you youcannotbeserious

Privately around our area I think the clinic in Spires hospital Cardiff (used to be the BUPA hospital). The clinic is called Innermost Secrets.

However as I said earlier on, I think you should see the consultant in the Gwent tomorrow and see how the land lies -

Ema76 I'll email you this afternoon and if you want you can let me know how tomorrow goes.

whatever, ema. i hope once your baby is born you become a bit more open-minded and flexible in life and in mindset. it makes for a much easier life.

good advice, youcantbe.

i think to get the kind of birth you want, ema, you may have to look very seriously at going private, especially if you don't want there to be the possibility of going into labour at all.

TBH Ema, I think you should ask for counselling, rather than just agreeing to it if they demand that you do. It sounds as if you have some understandable but quite deep fears connected with childbirth, and I think you are being a little naive in thinking that securing an elective CS will solve all of these.

I've had 2 emergency sections, and would have preferred VB both times. And I would not underestimate the problems, both physical and psychological/emotional, that CS can cause, regardless of your support network and the choices that you have made. I'm not trying to dissuade you, as you sound pretty resolute, I'm just encouraging you to talk to someone professional about your situation.

yes i am sure that the consultant will discuss my anxieties etc and agree they need to do their job.

Ema, just wondered if it was the same problem that caused the sad death of your great grandmother and problems for your mum and gran. I'm no medical expert, but if there's a hereditary reason for problems in childbirth then a. maybe something can be done for you to make your pregnancy and birth safer and b. this may make your case to have an elective c stronger.

Also, do you have any female blood relatives who have given birth without problems?

thank you all above for recent messages.
i am so sorry for your loss fiofio.

poorbuthappy yes email me please. i've noted the private hospital you mentioned. thank you so much will investigate it now.

i have no female relatives who haven't given birth without problems.

two of my great grandmothers died in childbirth.

it used to be a lot more common than it is now, sadly.

i had two vaginal births.

But it's not about the consultant 'doing their job'. Or rather it shouldn't be. It should be about you getting the best outcome, which, IMO, would involve getting to the bottom of what's causing your fears. Because you want to, not because someone else wants you to.

no i haven't cuppateajanice. all thebirths in my family have been awful to say the least and it just confirms things for me. although not related a very good friend of mine had ababy recently. she knows my views and always though - well it's natural and what the body does. after the birth she said i was the most sane person she knew as had a very traumatic time. another friend of mine had an emergency cs after hours of labour. although i know friends are not relatives it still further confirms things for me.

a friends brothers wife died in natural childbirth just a few years ago. that happens too

It's really early days, and like most have stated, it's quite unlikely a decision will be made so soon.

With both DD and DS, up until the last minute, medically I was going to need a c section (due to low lying placenta with DD and breech position with DS) which changed at week 38 in both instances.

Just go with the flow until later....

Ema - If you do consider the Portland, I would def. recommend Mr. Kunde (Works between Lansdell and Portland).

He was wonderful and I felt he listened to and respected what I was saying. My scar is tiny (DS is 3MO now) and I was up and about after 12 hours. And my bikini days aren't over!

My whole experience was wonderful. Happiest day of my life, with my DH with me throughout (was a big factor for me)

I appreciate that CSs carry risks, and there are others here far better placed to talk about them, but IMHO, a CS was the best thing for me, my fmily and my son.

And it was still a wonderful, special and intensely emotional moment. I do believe that a woman knows her own body and if you feel strongly about this, then you should have the birth you want.

YCBS x

just went on innermostsecrets site - feel relieved already!!

I'm not sure I understand why you are worried about dying in childbirth but not worried about dying from a CS related complication. The result is the same surely?

The fact that you have had previous surgery won't go in your favour I'm afraid. In fact it's more likely to go against you. Multiple stomach surgeries leave you at risk of adhesions and they can be very nasty. Mine almost killed me.

Counselling sounds like a must.

Actually having a planned caesarean when you want one has just about the best psychological outcome of any type of birth.

This Swedish study showed that women with a phobia of childbirth who had counselling had more caesareans - and were happier because of it.
Those who didn't have counselling had fewer caesareans, yes, but also had a much worse time. Which I really don't think is a great outcome. Counselling seemed to give women the confidence to choose the way of giving birth that suits them best - something Ema already feels very sure about.

www.ingentaconnect.com/content/bsc/bjo/2006/00000113/00000006/art00004;jsessionid=4p7gltu81923k.alic e?format=print

My own consultant said, 'Look, I have to tell you you run twice the risk of serious complications if you have a caesarean, but twice nothing is still nothing"
Don't panic Ema, even NHS guidelines say that women should be offered a caesarean in cases like yours. Take no notice of what midwives say, you just need a consultant to say yes and get it organised. I'm sure they will realise that this is blighting your pregnancy and hopefully you will get the reassurance you need so you can start to enjoy your pregnancy.
Good luck!

thank you so much youcannotbeserious. i'll make note of him

incontinence is a risk from a section as well.

After my elective section, when they damaged my bladder, I re-read my notes (before leaving the hospital). A whole load had been added about how I had been warned of the risk of fecal and urinary incontinence from a section and I was happy to accept that risk. In fact no such conversation had taken place although it was no doubt listed on the consent form.